Inspired by another post here, what is the best/ funniest name for a pet you’ve ever heard?

When we were much much younger my siblings and I had hamsters, I can’t remember the names of mine and my sisters but I can remember my brother named his Double O Nibbles (00Nibbles - as in 007)

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Human_Performance945@reddit

Dad once had a friend who called his Westie dog Fred…

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Nimmyzed@reddit

sucks in air through clenched teeth

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GrandMoffNoseyBonk@reddit

Old friend of mine had a dog he called 'Bare Arse' due to the lack of fur around his anus... I'd also mention he loved that dog more than anything 🍻

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WPorter77@reddit

I know people who have had dogs and cats with two names like humans

Tommy Stonks & John Loo being my favourites, the latter being named after two words for toilet.

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Succotash-suffer@reddit

My grandpa had a three legged Staff named Tripod

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Creepy_Radio_3084@reddit

Daughter had a cat called Diogi (Dee-Oh-Gee). Friend had a dog called Dog. (Said friend previously had a Doberman called Snert, after Hagar the Horrible's dog, who was lovely but thick as a brick).

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keelekingfisher@reddit

I once met a cocker spaniel named Jarvis

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Think-Professional-2@reddit (OP)

This is my favourite so far! 😂

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Many_Hamster6055@reddit

2 of my Neighbours have Dogs called Humphrey and Sherlock!!😂😂😂😂😂

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RAGEWOMBLE-Z@reddit

A pair of German Shepherds called Pikey and Asbo.

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EvilCustardy@reddit

A dog named 'Deefa' (deefa dog = d for dog).

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robfuscate@reddit

My miniature poodle cross with black curly hair was named Merkin

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bigsillygiant@reddit

Fenton, Fenton, Fenton, oh bloody hell Fenton, not sure how us centric this thread is, but any UK reddit or may get a chuckle

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Real_Ad_4173@reddit

I knew someone with a dog called 'Difa' as in 'Difa Dog' or 'D for Dog'

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Mother_Ad7869@reddit

There was a dachshund living in the town I used to live in named Richmond 🌭🤗🤗

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josh5676543@reddit

My dad knew someone who had a cat called bastard

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Tough-Whereas1205@reddit

I had a cat called bastard. Irritating little ginger twat.

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KetoFatBoy@reddit

I have 3 cats. Chester, Brenda and Larry. Can't blame the kids. I named them.

If I ever get another, I would like to call them Mlem Fandango.

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Imperator_Helvetica@reddit

Meow! Feed me! Meow! Feed me! Meow! Feed me!

I can hear you Mlem Fandango.

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MadWifeUK@reddit

We have a Brenda cat! Her brother was Malcolm, we named them after the Watching characters.

We also have Mollie, Florence, Edna, Mordred and Penny in the house.

In the barn we have Tedwina (Teddy until she had kittens), Berta (Bert until she had kittens), Stevie, Marley-Bob, Martok, Kahless, Harry, Hermione, Cederica (Cedric until we spotted she was a she), and Tonks who only answers to Tonksy-Toot.

Visiting toms we have Alistair (after Moody: Manx cat with half an ear and one eye), Kingsley and Toby Biscuits (his name is Toby but he thinks his name is Biscuits).

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ilikecocktails@reddit

Brenda 😂

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IntrovertedGiraffe@reddit

A trio of pigs: stink, odor, and smell

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pervertsage@reddit

I recommend 'Miasma' if you happen to get a fourth. Sounds quite formal and feminine in a noxious sort of way.

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Obvious-Water569@reddit

Today is the 1 year anniversary of when we lost our tuxedo Siberian cat, Sloppy Joe.

His name always got a chuckle at the vet's.

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BackgroundGate3@reddit

I thought naming the Eastenders' dog, Wellard, was pretty good.

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BarryIslandIdiot@reddit

When I was a teen, we had a Budgie that would attack people if they put their hand in it's cage. It didn't have a name until my mum was watching Eastenders one evening. When the dog was on screen, she said, "That dog isn't Wellard, my Budgie is Wellard." So it stuck.

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Fudball1@reddit

Shouted in the waiting room at the vets - Cornelius McAvennie. I assume it was some sort of small rodent as the guy who stood up was holding a wee box, smaller than a shoe box.

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knittingkitten04@reddit

Our son named our cat Ian and his hamster Mary

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647666@reddit

Had a vat named Nigel

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321noej@reddit

Deefor.

Years ago we had family friends and their dog was called Deefor. I never knew why until my mum told me much later: Deefor dog.

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Purple_Guinea_Pig@reddit

We have a chicken with a dodgy leg who hops more than walks. We call her Tumbleweed.

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Purple_Guinea_Pig@reddit

We had a bearded dragon called Harry, which is not that unusual in and of itself, but we named her (yes, she was a girl dragon) that, so that my husband could come down every morning and greet her with “Yer a lizard, Harry”.

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HannaaaLucie@reddit

My MIL has a pug x chinese crested (so imagine a pug, but completely hairless). She called him Dobby after the house elf on Harry Potter as he's the same colour with long ears.

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williamshatnersbeast@reddit

Just rescued a spaniel called Harry. I’m not a bit fan of human names as pet names but it is what it is. However, when I found it he was named after Harry Styles I couldn’t abide it so he is now called Ray Harry Houndsen if anyone asks.

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yearsofpractice@reddit

We got my kids two goldfish and during the journey home from the pet shop they were given about 20 different names based on things being seen from the car - “Red Light” and “Line” being the standouts. They settled on “Flash” and (I love this) “Barry”

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danger_of_biscuits@reddit

When our vet calls the next patient into the treatment room, he calls the animal's name followed by the surname of the owner. I'll never forget the day when he walked out, sighed heavily, and called out: 'Flash Gordon?'

The entire waiting room erupted in hysterics as the grinning owner of an ancient basset hound started the slow walk towards the vet.

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Fluffy-Rhubarb9089@reddit

They should absolutely have played the theme music for that walk

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colinah87@reddit

Fenton!

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cheesecake_413@reddit

We have a grey cat called Concrete, and a black cat with ginger speckles called Cinder

Despite being colour coded, my mum still gets them the wrong way round

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Strong_Roll5639@reddit

Our whippet is called Desmond, which always gets an "aww" or a laugh.

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Bullshit_Brummie@reddit

Met a woman from the Black Country at a prize giving for Johnson's Veterinary Products who owned a lurcher called Juanforte. Wow, I said that's a posh name and she said it was his kennel number at the rescue centre - 140. If you know the accent, you know it's true!

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dinkidoo7693@reddit

There was a guy up near where i used to live with a collie called Tamwar after the easterners character.
The dog wasn’t the best at recall and it was hilarious to hear him shout for it

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BeEccentric@reddit

FENTON!! Oh Jesus Christ… FENTON!!!

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Ok_Owl_8062@reddit

amazing!!!! Side note I used to really fancy Masood.

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GosmeisterGeneral@reddit

My ex had a chinchilla called Derek Acorah. Only ever referred to him by his full name. We were together for 2 years and I still never really understood where it came from.

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hellhound28@reddit

That man was pure comedy gold. What a great chinchilla name!

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yyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet@reddit

Derek Acorah is the scouse medium who was in Most Haunted back in the day.

Absolute lunatic.

‘Mary Looks Dick’ IYKYK

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Legit_Vampire@reddit

😂 & when he was on the balcony at the Skirrid Inn ( where they used to hang prisoners) " yes they're tossing them off here"

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Visible_Grand_8561@reddit

My neighbour has huge moggy called Catfunt, because its a huge pussy.

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Daniel_De_Bosola@reddit

I met a little dog called Sherlock, which was made better when the owner said their surname was Holmes

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hazps@reddit

Someone on "Heartbeat" had a dog called Deefer, which I was rather liked.

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hutchipoos@reddit

Wasn't it Hollyoaks?

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hazps@reddit

Possibly both, but there was definately one in Heartbeat.

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Competitive_Reward21@reddit

All I can think of is Greengrass’ dog Alfred.

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hazps@reddit

Just checked - she belonged to David.

https://heartbeat.fandom.com/wiki/Deefer

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hutchipoos@reddit

Ah, I tried to avoid heartbeat if possible but it was on when I still lived at home so ended up watching it occasionally, but must have missed the dog.

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NobleNun@reddit

I had a rabbit called Arfur.

And another rabbit called Elvis.

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Any-Conversation7485@reddit

A dog called Dejavu. My dad couldn't stop saying the same joke every time he saw it "I'm sure I've seen that dog before."

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Collide74@reddit

Teabag- cat Quill smith- hedgehog

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gotanygrapes88@reddit

Mr. Wiggles

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Top-Bet1435@reddit

The woman who designed my bedroom fitted units said her daughter had 2 pet pigs named Snoop Hoggy Hog and The Notorious P.I.G.

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shiverslinky@reddit

A member of my wife’s family used to call their SO “chicken” which was funny when they were planning food.

“Do you want chicken, chicken?”

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CatalinaBigPaws@reddit

This is in bad taste!!

I'm not defending it, I married into this family in the 90's, the starving stray cat they homed came in the 80's (important for context).

El Stumpo the Ethiopian Tall-Cat.

It was a starving, tail-less cat. Went by Stumpo until it's passing. RiP Stumpo

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MissionFig5582@reddit

There was a stray three legged dog on Koh Pha-Ngan dog named Tripod.

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FredH3663@reddit

Down the road is very friendly dog called Phoebe

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Defiant_Return_2908@reddit

Was in the vets the other day, the nurse was on the phone to inform someone that Gandalf's bloods had come back fine.

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a-ks94@reddit

Came here to see Gandalf. Especially as the Gandalf I’m talking about was an old, long haired grey cat with a very dramatic yowl. Gandalf wasn’t a fan of his cat carrier, but when the nurse called “Gandalf!” in the waiting room, he yowled right back at her. Made the whole waiting room chuckle.

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Faithful_jewel@reddit

Someone I know once had a dog called Trousers.

My ex knew someone who named their cat Flannel.

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tent_tickles@reddit

I met a dog named Pajamas once

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Wonderful-Pollution7@reddit

I received a russian blue cat from a family member named Kitka. Because kitty kat, but russian sounding.

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Roysterini@reddit

I had a cat called Dave.

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Thestolenone@reddit

I name my cats after gods and goddesses. My current two are Seth and Aradia, my last two were Juno and Kali.

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KFlaps@reddit

Our family dog when I was a teenager was officially called Jet (pretty typical), but he was a GSP with most velvety black ears. One day one of my friends called him Captain Goodears and it sort of stuck.

I miss Captain Goodears.

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Abbiethedog@reddit

I love pets with regular people names. When we bought our first house our next door neighbor had a golden retriever named Larry. I asked why and he said he never knew a bad Larry.

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Curious_Buy_3955@reddit

I really enjoy someone calling a dog in a park with a normal human name. Like Alan or Geoff.

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Good-Gur-7742@reddit

I had a dog called Madame Baguette. Shortened fo madbag.

I also had a horse called Plop.

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InteractionThen9424@reddit

One of our customers had a French Bulldog named Biggie Small Paws 💀

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SomeWomanFromEngland@reddit

A three legged cat named Yardstick.

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anonynonnymoose@reddit

One of the preschoolers named her cat Meowcolm.

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CartersUSM@reddit

My vet allegedly had clients with the surname Lee who had two dogs called Brocco and Ravio Parents’ friends had a cat called Bonkers which I always thought was great! And of course Furris Mewller.

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KatVanWall@reddit

When I was on holiday last year, the dog next door kept escaping into the yard where we were staying. He had a tag on his collar saying ‘McKay’, so my mum kept calling him McKay until we realised that that was just the surname of the guy who owned him. When he called him, he called ‘Daniel’, so clearly the dog’s name was Daniel, which kinda made me laugh as it seems like such a human name! (I have 3 friends called Daniel!) After that, my mum and daughter kept referring to the dog as ‘Daniel McKay’, which seems like such a relentlessly human sort of name that it struck me as funny on a dog.

It was only several months later that I realised Daniel was probably called Daniel because he was a spaniel. Daniel the spaniel. Duh. I still like his full name, though!

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No_Concentrate6785@reddit

Cooking fat

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Frequent-Lock7949@reddit

Oh and I met a dog called Dave Growl once

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Telchara@reddit

Read about a chicken called Kylo Hen, and a boa constrictor named Julius Squeezer.

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RhubarbSalty3588@reddit

A friend had two dogs named Oi and you!!

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jamboman_@reddit

I know someone with a dog called Kev.

I used to have a cat named 'Lisa Davies'. We always called her by her full name.

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SkullDump@reddit

A friend of mine used to have a cat called Breakfast which seemed weird at first but which very quickly became quite normal.

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Low_Mistake3321@reddit

We have a big ginger cat named Alan. He croaks in a strangled-sounding way and can make a decent attempt at saying his own name.

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Anxious_Ad6026@reddit

Bird i knew a while back, named her chihuahua MyTitz

Could often hear in the park shouting C'mon MyTitz

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I_am_notagoose@reddit

I had a hamster as a kid, and around the time I got it my dad was often going to Amsterdam for work, so obviously it got named Hamsterdam (Dammy for short)

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Old-Refrigerator340@reddit

My Stats lecturer had a load of guinea pigs, like 30 odd. One was called '101st Airborne Division' (it was around the time Band of Brothers came out).

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rbarker82@reddit

The vicar in our local town once had a dog named Confess. He’d have fun calling her back whenever she ran off…

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RafRafRafRaf@reddit

My childhood dentist had a dog called Floss. 😂

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mandlepot@reddit

A pug named doug

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Quality_Cabbage@reddit

I have springer spaniels called Mr Loverman and Shabba. I get some funny looks in the park when I call them. (Sadly, none of the above is true.)

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Darkgreenbirdofprey@reddit

Chicken: Cluck Norris

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finH1@reddit

My cat is called Margaret

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jilljd38@reddit

We have a one eyed cat , my sons have nicknamed Dale after Dale Cregan

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CwningenFach@reddit

Many moons ago, a friend had two cats. One was called Devon. The other was called Malcolm. Yes, Devon Malcolm was their favourite cricketer. Why do you ask?

More recently, another friend - whose surname is Knight - had a dog called Jedi. At the time, vets tended to call your pet's first name and your surname. I'm not sure whether that's a thing now

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Naive_Box1096@reddit

Sausage

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borisdidnothingwrong@reddit

My mom had a coworker who named her dog Foramen, because she needed a dog like she needed a hole in her head.

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jonathing@reddit

We used to have a dark, chocolate brown cockapoo called Sunshine

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StrawberryF5@reddit

Happy Cake Day.

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-cunningstunt@reddit

I lived near a couple who found a stray dog rummaging their bins. They ended up keeping the dog and named him ‘Osama Bin Raider’

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thekittysays@reddit

When he was being particularly drooly I used to call my childhood dog Sloberdog Molosovitch.

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Think_Duty_5599@reddit

This is fantastic

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jimmywhereareya@reddit

Went on holiday to the Dominican Republic, many moons ago. Anyway we went on a jeep safari, the guide was very enthusiastically telling us about a dog in the village that we were to stop in for refreshments. Big Willie he told us was famous all across the island because, well he had a.. Guy wasn't kidding. there must have been something wrong with that poor dog. He could barely walk for the size of the thing

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gravejrI@reddit

My first gf had a gold fish called Legolas... Sounds like leg-a-less. Uni house mate just went with Hitler Barnon Von Cuntflaps when we had fish in the house as his has a little black patch above its mouth.

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cider-with-lousy@reddit

Didn’t Noel or Liam Gallagher have two cats called Mick and Keith?

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WallsendLad70@reddit

Gary.

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trainpk85@reddit

My mum used to have a cat who my daughter named when she was learning about space.

Vet records..

First name - Neil Armstrong Surname - Laser Cat

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DarthFlowers@reddit

When I was a student in Nottingham I came across someone with an Iguana called Kieran. Truth be told I was high at the time of this discovery - giggles in abundance. *

Disclaimer - it’s still hilarious when categorically sober

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GreenMist1980@reddit

A white cat with black patches in certain places, Kitler

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Missing-Caffeine@reddit

My partner had a cat with one ear called Vinny.

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One-Contest-2221@reddit

I have a bald cat called nudacris

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Queen_of_London@reddit

I probably like some of the names people on the other thread hated. For example, a friend had a cat named Toe, and I loved that.

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Not_Nora@reddit

That’s a magnificent name!

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lucanidaeblack@reddit

Met a pug called Ian once and still laugh to myself thinking about it sometimes.

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BUNT7@reddit

I call my dog Jurgen

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Fickle_Hope2574@reddit

A comedian called casio kid shared a story about a cat his friends girlfriend had, it was hit by a car and needed to use a wheelchair. His idea was make it useful and tie a little man behind it and call it Ben purr.

Absolutely floored me when I heard that.

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SituationNorth@reddit

Had a cat with hairless legs (he had an allergy of some sort) so we called him Scrappypants. Hair grew back but the name stuck.

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Mr5wift@reddit

Chairman Meow

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strawberrypops@reddit

My sister has a rat named Ratticus Finch, she did well with that one!

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dwhite21787@reddit

We were adopted by a mother cat with 3 kittens (2f,1m) and we named them Emmy, Goldie, Toni and Oscar after the award shows.

We also acquired 3 black cats (2m,1f) and named them Martin, Malcolm and Rosa.

The last litter of 4 I lost the imagination and we have Boog, Barefoot, Socks and Shadow.

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Cultural-Summer-2669@reddit

A cat called Doug

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WigglesFT@reddit

Growing up our home was a foster home for cats. We had hundreds over the years. There were points where we had as many as 14 at any one time. One of our own cats had a litter. My dad didn't like that we had so many cats and wanted to sell the litter. After a lot of negotiation and compromise he eventually agreed to keep one on the condition that he names the cat. He chose F**king Cat. My mum of course rejected this name. After more negotiations they settled on the name Cooking Fat.

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Rymundo88@reddit

A friend of mine had a King Charles, who he called Lewis, full name was Spaniel Day Lewis.

Which was great, but I think came second too my cat called Feline-el Richie

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3507341C@reddit

So I was convinced a friend of a friend was calling his dog Fullsome, it seemed very odd. Anyway, turns out he called it FLSM, short for Four Legged Sh1t Machine.

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RuthBaderBelieveIt@reddit

My uncle had a cat called lamppost

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RuthBaderBelieveIt@reddit

A dog called "help" not ideal when he got himself into a Fenton situation

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Stabbykarp@reddit

My Mum had a knack for naming most of our pets. She likes the old British comedians so we had

Ronnie Barker, dog

Eric and Ernie the hamsters till we found out it was actually Erica and Ernie and she ate the second litter

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VictorySignificant15@reddit

A pitty called Brad

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Agnesperdita@reddit

A cat named Cooking Fat.

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RuthBaderBelieveIt@reddit

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/s/BGinnc2Vyq do you guys know each other?

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aliclang@reddit

Are you the Ex..?

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FinancialCoat7315@reddit

When I was a kid a neighbour had a 3 legged dog called Tripod

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Musashi1596@reddit

Gary lasereyes

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BlackJackKetchum@reddit

I know someone who had a hamster called ‘Slutface’. There was some fancy footwork needed when a straitlaced relative asked the creature’s name.

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Muzz124@reddit

I’ve got a German shorthaired pointer called Hamish. I’ve always been a fan of dogs with human names.

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aliclang@reddit

I've got an Italian greyhound named Terrance. Human names are the best kind of names

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Key_Milk_9222@reddit

Ronnie Barker

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Think-Professional-2@reddit (OP)

Love it!

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