TheaterFire

It don't matter to Jesus!

Posted by therealtwomartinis@reddit | lebowski | View on Reddit | 135 comments

It don't matter to Jesus!

Reply to Post

135 Comments

somanyusernames23@reddit

Jesus’
View on Reddit #48141913

Regular-Quit-1331@reddit

How can I love something that doesn’t exist?
View on Reddit #47917371

ManlyVanLee@reddit

Feminist's, catholic's, and mormon's what? Also what is a 'High Fullutent?'
View on Reddit #47913457

BottleAgreeable7981@reddit

Was trying to figure out who 100Laters were until a synapse fired and I saw IDOLATERS.
View on Reddit #47907021

gettinsadonreddit@reddit

https://youtu.be/mHa1zTLrXO8?si=uaQjuDdClHXQSBWx
View on Reddit #47906837

dasuglystik@reddit

This is the absolute most unnecessary commas I have ever seen.
View on Reddit #47891859

Affectionate-Raise-8@reddit

😡 I’m in 9 of the check list
View on Reddit #47888896

Ok_Stand7885@reddit

I’m on the list. Win.
View on Reddit #47879427

DanInNorthBend@reddit

So is this one of those lists where I add up the number that I am pro?
View on Reddit #47878033

GratefulDawg73@reddit

Come on, man. I had a rough night and I hate the fuckin' apostrophes, man!
View on Reddit #47785470

quintyoung@reddit

You beat me to it, I came here to say that I love how everything shows possession
View on Reddit #47873701

Baronvonkludge@reddit

The apostrophe is the crux of the biscuit.
View on Reddit #47796025

The6Strings@reddit

You can’t say that
View on Reddit #47836864

PunkRockMiniVan@reddit

Taste the biscuit. Taste the goodness of the biscuit. Taste the honey sauce. Taste the goodness of the biscuit with the honey sauce.
View on Reddit #47796796

Emergency_Garlic_713@reddit

![gif](giphy|hiLLD9o1wTB3a)
View on Reddit #47819356

runk_dasshole@reddit

That some kind of Eastern thing?
View on Reddit #47813251

Baronvonkludge@reddit

ZAPPA
View on Reddit #47815449

runk_dasshole@reddit

[Far out](https://www.slugmag.com/archived/zappa-behind-the-sneer-june-1995/)
View on Reddit #47816908

Baronvonkludge@reddit

Fuckin A
View on Reddit #47817604

Cream_Gingerly@reddit

He told me no, no, no. I told him yes, yes, yes!
View on Reddit #47798557

therealtwomartinis@reddit (OP)

‘cuz the night before, behind the door, a leprechaun had *stroooooooked it*
View on Reddit #47803804

Lumpy5887@reddit

My PANCAKES are not this issue!!
View on Reddit #47811411

hefebellyaro@reddit

Fuck you. You don't like apostrophes, find your own ficking protest.
View on Reddit #47819128

EminorHeart@reddit

Apparently it’s a lot more fun!
View on Reddit #47872277

omn1p073n7@reddit

But then they came for me, a new ager.
View on Reddit #47872150

Ghostofmerlin@reddit

Well, we all know what Jesus said about using unnecessary apostrophes.
View on Reddit #47870445

lotusland17@reddit

No actual possessive apostrophes were harmed in the creation of this sign.
View on Reddit #47862710

Whisky_Shivers@reddit

"We only have 37 names for our banner, we need 38!" Guy in the back of this meeting waving his hands : "SPORTS NUTS!"
View on Reddit #47861888

Donkey_Bugs@reddit

A friend of the devil is a friend of mine.
View on Reddit #47852218

therealtwomartinis@reddit (OP)

Adulterer’s got a wife in Chino, baby And one in Cherokee
View on Reddit #47860487

OJimmy@reddit

Also Dude, " liberal's" is not the preferred Nomenclature, liberalS please
View on Reddit #47859213

Past_Guava@reddit

P.K.’s!
View on Reddit #47858276

AnominousBeef45@reddit

The unnecessarily possessive's
View on Reddit #47850115

Mental_Somewhere2341@reddit

Do you think they got all the way to *THIEVE’S* and then were like, “Oh.. Shit.”?
View on Reddit #47847678

strongsilenttypos@reddit

Dis Loud Mouth Women open for the “bunch of assholes” on the Speed of Sound tour? Really dig their early stuff…
View on Reddit #47845453

ZestyEnterprise72@reddit

All the Dude ever wanted was his apostrophe back
View on Reddit #47840811

Nein-Toed@reddit

As a Satanist I feel a bit underrepresented by this list
View on Reddit #47840610

PebbleSizedPleb@reddit

![gif](giphy|MPuTZQqOmYKPK)
View on Reddit #47840215

Glittering_Bet_8610@reddit

And they peed on your fuckin` rug dude
View on Reddit #47798343

cozmo1138@reddit

They peed on my fuckin’ rug.
View on Reddit #47834969

FleshyPartOfThePin@reddit

HIGH FALLUTEN!!!
View on Reddit #47787411

cozmo1138@reddit

Someone the square community won’t give a shit about.
View on Reddit #47834926

LastUserStanding@reddit

I think "Why do you love the devil?" isn't a question being asked of all the people in this list. This is actually a great list of reasons to love the devil. OK fine I need a Lebowski tie-in: "I've got information, man! New shit has come to light!"
View on Reddit #47786606

cozmo1138@reddit

Real! For the most part, these are my people, man!
View on Reddit #47834860

Several_Dark_7711@reddit

What are P.K.'s? Penalty killers?
View on Reddit #47785675

sakko303@reddit

Psycho Kinetics ala Stranger Things
View on Reddit #47788863

cozmo1138@reddit

Growing up in Christian circles, PKs were always what pastors kids were called, so I was confused when I saw them on the list. This makes a lot more sense.
View on Reddit #47834761

MyGrandmasCock@reddit

He’s talking about PK’s Burgers in Brea, California. It’s a place where they serve both American fare and Mexican food, which this guy says is “comestible miscegenation”, or basically “food race-mixing”. He thinks burgers and burritos should “stick to their own kind.”
View on Reddit #47823404

FalseDmitriy@reddit

heidelbeer-PfannKuchen
View on Reddit #47806048

Several_Dark_7711@reddit

She has also pigs in blanket
View on Reddit #47806198

handsomeape95@reddit

r/apostrophegore... Fuck me. Now I know this exists.
View on Reddit #47785217

cozmo1138@reddit

Oh, “Fuck it.” Yes, that’s your answer. That’s your answer to everything. Tattoo it on your forehead!
View on Reddit #47834487

Alternative-Way-8753@reddit

That must be exhausting.
View on Reddit #47800390

InternationalWolf899@reddit

At least it’s an ethos.
View on Reddit #47785759

AmbassadorCheap3956@reddit

This club has everything…
View on Reddit #47830123

Confident-Security84@reddit

I didn’t see “Loud mouth Men”.
View on Reddit #47784428

theAlphabetZebra@reddit

I’ll admit that loud mouth women got me a little bit. Thieves and murderers and you know who else? Women who speak too loudly!
View on Reddit #47797577

Metaphysical-Failure@reddit

Are not loud mouth women and feminists one and the same? J/k
View on Reddit #47826435

theAlphabetZebra@reddit

you know, that question would break a lesser man lol
View on Reddit #47829220

sorotomotor@reddit

*I didn’t see “Loud mouth Men”.* He's holding the sign
View on Reddit #47784921

black2fade@reddit

Mark it zero!
View on Reddit #47828704

Regular-Flamingo9882@reddit

This whole church is just me and the bag man, man.
View on Reddit #47827319

Cosmicfool13@reddit

I thought it was a menu. I had picked out 7 before I realized it wasn’t.
View on Reddit #47825996

_WillCAD_@reddit

* Rustler's * Cut throat's * Murderer's * Bounty hunter's * Desperado's * Mug's * Pug's * Thug's * Nitwit's * Halfwit's * Dimwit's * Viper's * Sniper's * Conmen' * Indian agent's * Mexican bandit's * Mugger's * Buggerer's * Bushwhacker's * Hornswoggler's * Horse thieve's * Bull dyke's * Train robber's * Bank robber's * Ass-kicker's * Shit-kicker's * Methodist's
View on Reddit #47812060

therealtwomartinis@reddit (OP)

scumbum’s wharf rat’s lowlife’s numbnut’s bootlicker’s poontanger’s soft-soaper’s beseecher’s wrangler’s sumbitch’s
View on Reddit #47825282

teacher-dude@reddit

Highfalutin
View on Reddit #47824080

Emergency_Garlic_713@reddit

Apparently that is my checklist. I'm on there multiple times.
View on Reddit #47819705

KarlPHungus@reddit

The unnecessary apostrophes are what offend me
View on Reddit #47786110

AdultishRaktajino@reddit

Apostrophe or “comma to the top” if you’re not into the whole brevity thing. That’s god’s comma.
View on Reddit #47810791

Blue-cheese-dressing@reddit

The “royal” comma, man.
View on Reddit #47818115

KarlPHungus@reddit

That some sort of Eastern thing?
View on Reddit #47816809

TryAgain024@reddit

r/apostrophegore
View on Reddit #47815814

Dee_DozyBekyMiknTish@reddit

Wifebeaters treat objects like women, man.
View on Reddit #47815428

Crazy-Reward-4783@reddit

Why do I LOVE Grammar? Apostrophe 'S' denotes possession. IF you're going to try and insult someone, at the very LEAST, make sure you are using correct grammar when you do it.
View on Reddit #47814390

Wildcat_Dunks@reddit

They're just against people possessing things.
View on Reddit #47813954

ThePanzerMan@reddit

Nihilist's
View on Reddit #47812939

GubbaBumpz@reddit

I’m not trying to be possessive here. She’s just my lady friend!
View on Reddit #47811609

_WillCAD_@reddit

Until it goes *click.*
View on Reddit #47811137

AdultishRaktajino@reddit

The original Port Hades statement. Not the compromised second draft.
View on Reddit #47810243

KrabbyPatty2028@reddit

It reads like the list of men that Headley Lamar wanted in Blazing Saddles 😂
View on Reddit #47787246

AdultishRaktajino@reddit

Kinky!
View on Reddit #47810068

Hirsute_Sophist@reddit

And Methodist's
View on Reddit #47794802

mxpx77@reddit

Hahahaha high fullutent
View on Reddit #47809568

WileyCoyote7@reddit

I got 12 of those dude,…mark it down.
View on Reddit #47808602

cov1972@reddit

Repent for your inappropriate use of apostrophes. You’ll be saying Book of Revelations next. Tch.
View on Reddit #47808589

tucker_sitties@reddit

Shit kickers, mercenaries and Methodists!!!!
View on Reddit #47795706

FalseDmitriy@reddit

Could you repeat that, sir?
View on Reddit #47806489

WhiskeyBadger_@reddit

I got 14. What did you guys get?
View on Reddit #47794184

therealtwomartinis@reddit (OP)

14 year olds, Dude
View on Reddit #47802301

WhiskeyBadger_@reddit

Mark it zero!
View on Reddit #47805494

dubiousdouchebaggery@reddit

Pretty much covers everyone.
View on Reddit #47805475

Speedhabit@reddit

I haven’t heard lesbians referred to as sophists since college
View on Reddit #47805149

El_Mec@reddit

Emo’s? Like a gothic monk?
View on Reddit #47794388

Mano_LaMancha@reddit

And making the list before pedophiles. Sad hair swoop, indeed.
View on Reddit #47805139

krakatoa83@reddit

Nihilist’s
View on Reddit #47804929

PerfectlyCalmDude@reddit

They spelled Ba'hai wrong.
View on Reddit #47785396

krakatoa83@reddit

They spelled everything wrong homie.
View on Reddit #47804852

Genghis_Chong@reddit

My buddies didn't die face down in the muck for these damn emo's, these sports nuts....
View on Reddit #47788556

therealtwomartinis@reddit (OP)

uhh, it’s “Sports Nut’s” please
View on Reddit #47803848

imjustmos@reddit

Sport nuts? Obviously you’re not a golfer dude
View on Reddit #47803819

eugeneyr@reddit

What’s a Bahi, Walter?
View on Reddit #47803404

moethedestroyer@reddit

Nothing is possessive? The Godamn apostrophe has crashed into the sign!
View on Reddit #47802265

Bag-Lady_Bills@reddit

I won many Grammys being in Loud mouth women.
View on Reddit #47802228

smkestcklghtn@reddit

Wow. Loud mouthed women
View on Reddit #47800349

JiveChicken00@reddit

What's a P.K., Walter?
View on Reddit #47798553

InsuranceThen9352@reddit

What about known pornographer's who treat women like objects man?
View on Reddit #47798108

HermiticHubris@reddit

After the uhhh, what-have-you
View on Reddit #47796435

j05mh@reddit

“They all think he’s a righteous dude”
View on Reddit #47786079

sakko303@reddit

OH ED! You sounded like Dirty Harry just then.
View on Reddit #47789233

CowPrestigious8447@reddit

Thank you, Grace.
View on Reddit #47795284

vhmike@reddit

Add "Dipshits with 9-Toed Women"
View on Reddit #47785863

Sad0ctopus@reddit

* Dipshit’s with 9-Toed Women, please.
View on Reddit #47787116

CowPrestigious8447@reddit

What are you a fuckin English professor, now?
View on Reddit #47795157

Kozzinator@reddit

Well I mean at least they hate racist"s
View on Reddit #47794536

CaptHab@reddit

Where is “pederast’s?” And how about “Nazi’s?”
View on Reddit #47786578

MaaartyMcFly@reddit

Those are good Republicans, Walter.
View on Reddit #47788328

Bob_Majerle@reddit

Shut the fuck up Elon
View on Reddit #47793330

jazzhandpanda@reddit

Are these the bahi's, Walter?
View on Reddit #47792669

jazzhandpanda@reddit

*in the HIGH FULLUTENT* "Mind if I do a J?"
View on Reddit #47792558

Nsflguru@reddit

It’s a list of everyone that fucks with the Jesus?
View on Reddit #47790574

KoobsInABox@reddit

WEAKLING'S COWARD'S BUM'S
View on Reddit #47790418

Dawildpep@reddit

So what are you supposed to be? A generic Christian republican?
View on Reddit #47783754

501Queen@reddit

3000 years of beautiful tradition from Moses to Sandy Koufax...
View on Reddit #47789259

GameTheory27@reddit

environmentalists? WTF?
View on Reddit #47785287

Interesting-Log-9627@reddit

"Concerned about the environment? Straight to hell."
View on Reddit #47788724

Genghis_Chong@reddit

Anything fun or progressive = bad In order to go to heaven you must live in perpetual self punishment and hatred
View on Reddit #47788647

Interesting-Log-9627@reddit

Drunkard Bahis absolutely fucking rock. Their bassist is awesome.
View on Reddit #47788630

ContentFlounder5269@reddit

As usual I got it laughed out of this when nothing else feels  laughable!  Fuck it dude let's go to in and out burger. That franchise is owned by the devil.
View on Reddit #47787019

tej1967@reddit

Those are good burgers, ContentFlounder5269!
View on Reddit #47788479

TabmeisterGeneral@reddit

"emos" lmao when is this from, 2006???
View on Reddit #47788361

Hot-College-7170@reddit

Apparently there’s a convention for this apostrophe use, because “druggies” didn’t make the cut 🤷‍♂️
View on Reddit #47788154

InternationalWolf899@reddit

You can tell they are with the devil. Most of the names are possessive.
View on Reddit #47785907

gunslingerJ0E@reddit

Pastors kids repent!
View on Reddit #47787038

Several_Dark_7711@reddit

"Thieve's" is sending me
View on Reddit #47785586

Muhfuggajones@reddit

I'm sorry I wasn't listening.
View on Reddit #47785127