The Dalai Lama once said “sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.” What experiences or anecdotes do you have to support this?
Posted by Katstronaut@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 56 comments
This quote has always helped me through disappointments in life.
Back in 2021 we were so desperate to buy a house that we had an offer accepted on what was, in hindsight, a pokey little flat that we would have been fed up with in no time. In a wonderful stroke of luck, we were gazumped by someone else, and went on to find a house that we’ll love and will hopefully be staying in for many years to come.
Be great to hear of any similar experiences from others.
Imreallyadonut@reddit
Seth Macfarlane was due to be on one of the planes that hit the World Trade Centre.
I imagine he wanted to get that flight, but he overslept and missed it.
JonnotheMackem@reddit
When I lived in China, I moved across the country, and my ex phoned me out of the blue one day and said she'd made a mistake leaving me, wanted to get back together and come join me where I was. But I would have to secure her a job before she moved. I said that was absurd and that was the end of that.
Met my now wife a month or so later.
thecuriouskilt@reddit
The example is more you couldn't something YOU wanted. It sounds like your ex wanted you and you said no... that doesn't seem to be the same thing.
Going with OP's question would be you wanted your ex back and SHE said no then you met your wife.
ThatsMeOnTop@reddit
Sorry to be that guy, but does this example really illustrate the quote? It sounds like you didn't want to be with your ex?
JonnotheMackem@reddit
I would have taken her back, had she not insisted I somehow get her a job before she left!
tmr89@reddit
What’s wrong with getting her a job?
JonnotheMackem@reddit
It wasn’t my country, nobody was gonna hire a stranger just because some foreigner said so, and I couldn’t exactly interview on her behalf and get her a job offer!
Level-Bet-868@reddit
Couldn’t she get a job in a chinky takeaway?
tmr89@reddit
Fair enough 👍
aliceinlondon@reddit
That was her not getting what she wanted
zephyrthewonderdog@reddit
Applied for a higher paying job and got it. They then pulled the offer, just after I resigned from my old job. I was now unemployed with enough bill money for a few months, then Covid kicked off.
I had no option but to go solo and start up on my own. Online at first then rented a business site. My business has been running three years now and I employ 5 people.
Desperation can be really big motivator.
Level-Bet-868@reddit
💥 your a real g
PetersMapProject@reddit
There was an admin error with my grades and UCAS; I ended up taking an unplanned gap year but it turned out to be fantastic - I worked full time for 7 months and then had the time of my life travelling for 6 months.
Went through a fairly traumatic breakup, but that led quite directly to me meeting and later adopting my dog - a substantial upgrade on my ex!
Level-Bet-868@reddit
Don’t shag the dog tho bro plz
Basso_69@reddit
Love it! Humans - a dog's best friend.
SenatorBiff@reddit
My entire career happened because I didn't get a crap job a few weeks before i stumbled into a trainee position doing something else. To think I was livid that day, if only I'd have known.
FJ_815@reddit
I just got a rejection email today for a job that I had 2 interviews for. Hearing stuff like this is good right now. I'm trying to tell myself that it wasn't meant to be and something better will come along.
Level-Bet-868@reddit
It was there loss,u were too good for the role
mediocrityindepth@reddit
Yes, I was rejected by Foxtons (a London Estate Agent) so I went to work selling audio equipment for Richer Sounds. HiFi has been the basis of my entire working life since then and I love it.
A-Grey-World@reddit
I'm very glad I got turned down for the Navy due to migraines after I applied. Looking back I don't think it would have been a good fit and I've had a great career since.
JennyW93@reddit
My current job (the only job I haven’t been sick of after 6 months) only happened because I left a career, took a slightly dodgy remote job that offered better pay and frequent trips to the Gibraltar office … and then got made redundant almost immediately (3 months in).
I was heartbroken to lose that job - especially after I’d left a niche career I’d trained for over a decade in.
About a week after the redundancy notice, my auntie got diagnosed with aggressive, terminal cancer. Redundancy payout meant I could spend her last months with her every single day. I applied for some bs jobs along the way, got one that paid better than the dodgy remote job and is basically fully remote anyway, and fucking love every minute of it. Auntie died on my first day of the new job because she’s got bants, think she wanted to get me a couple of days bereavement leave.
Expression-Little@reddit
I originally wanted to go to medical school. I got the grades but didn't get in after the interview phase. Instead, I took a gap year where I worked in China as an English teacher, France as an au pair, the UK as a nanny and applied for another course, the polar opposite subject (English lit) which took me to Canada for a year. Not the most employable field but it taught me a lot. Skip even more years to COVID and I trained as a personal trainer to make a side hustle online. Skip a bit more and my grandmother mistook PT as a physiotherapist and she was very surprised I could learn that online. Skip to now, I've gone from wannabe doctor to wannabe lecturer to physiotherapist. I've never been happier. It took a decade to get here, but I'm here now and it was all worth it.
croissant530@reddit
Got rejected from med school, now earn 200k+ working 9-5.30 in an interesting job with time for my hobbies. Was also diagnosed with autism and was able to get a private diagnosis. Medicine would have made me miserable, I see that now.
Seller of house pulled out on us twice, ended up saving more money so bought a bigger nicer house instead.
Got dumped by someone terrible just before I started a PhD, met my husband.
There are more but I now approach disappointments with a healthy dose of optimism which is often self-perpetuating.
hoodie92@reddit
I did the first year of a medical degree then failed out. Seemed like the worst thing in the world at the time but in retrospect I'm so glad it happened. I definitely don't earn 200k, but I earn about the same as a doctor my age would and I don't have to deal with being a doctor. So glad I didn't have to be in healthcare during COVID as well.
Candid_Associate9169@reddit
200,000? Hey divorce your husband for me. I can make a fantastic spaghetti bolognaise. Also I can burp talk.
Basso_69@reddit
What an offer!!
Candid_Associate9169@reddit
I can make you one too. I completely mastered snake on the 3310.
nibor@reddit
Quite a few really but i've kinda always been able to identify at pivotal points in my life and be thankful I took the decision I did. For some of them i can visualise what the alternative would be and it does not make me happy.
I really wanted to work for Oracle after university but got rejected, ended up working for a large media company where I did very well and have been able to progress to the top of my field. it is not a perfect line and I've had set backs but I'm pretty certain the choices I've made were the better life.
whostolemycatwasitu@reddit
Well I wanted to join the Navy around 2016, and I failed the eye sight test three times (just on the border). It was my one and only plan so when it fell through, I was absolutely clueless and had no direction. I applied for Camp America as a spur of the moment decision, ended up interviewing for it, getting the role and flying out 6 months later.
I met my wife, met my best friend who I still stay in contact with, and have a beautiful daughter who's almost two. Probably was the best thing that could've happened, although seemed like the worst at the time.
porspeling@reddit
Same story with buying a house but the owner turned out to be a pedo so we retracted the offer and found a much better one in a better location for the same price
Slothjitzu@reddit
Genuine question, why did you not buy a house just because the previous owner was a pedo?
porspeling@reddit
Several reasons. Im not handing over hundreds of thousands of pounds to a pedo first of all. The place was decorated creepy (thought there was a teenagers bedroom but turns out he lived alone?), there were posters of the clown from IT and other weird stuff in there so you don’t want that mental image when you know the background. Finally you don’t want the neighbours to know yours as the pedo house.
theflickingnun@reddit
The best way to live is to not die.
The fastest way to happiness is to steal it
The sun burns the eyes but warms the soul
A cold beer swallowed tastes better than a warm beer regurgitated
Anyone can spout this crap.
Katstronaut@reddit (OP)
All those were shite though
permaculture@reddit
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometime you'll find
You get what you need
-=- Jagger
sleepyprojectionist@reddit
I missed out on a promotion to technical trainer at work.
The guy who got it was notoriously shit and it really rubbed me up the wrong way.
A year or so later and we had a deal fall through that meant that we wouldn’t be hiring anyone new for the foreseeable future, so they made him redundant.
Bullet dodged.
bannanawaffle13@reddit
I was at college as a late-entry student completed my course but decided against following the career I was going for and was going to volunteer up on Iona for a year but was told thanks but no thanks, I ended up in the job I am in now which I love and given me the opportunity to explore a different calling, something I doubt I would have done if I went to Iona.
grouchytortoise@reddit
Was rejected for voluntary redundancy. Hated my job role so I applied for 3 jobs within the company that were basically the same role just different departments. Rejected after 2 rounds of interviews for one, outright rejected for the second and got the third a few months later. Met my partner from working at that job that I wouldn’t have in the other 2 departments. I also got double the payout when voluntary redundancy rolled around again.
Bonus - for the original redundancy my plan was to teach in China… second half of 2019.
geth1962@reddit
I took early retirement. A month later, I was offered a job. This job was a zero hours contract and minimum wage. I walked after being lied to about my prospects of a good contract for ten months. I really loved that job and wanted to stay there. After a few permutations, I was offered a much better job, with a better contract and better pay
HmNotToday1308@reddit
I was due to start a new job on Monday, on Thursday they sent all the stuff confirming and then tried to lower my pay by £15k a year and act like I was the one who misunderstood despite having it in writing, signed contract etc. They are legally allowed to do this within the first month and were all too happy about telling me too.
So I didn't show up on the Monday. Husband was working from home and yeah had the little boy we'd been hoping for 36 weeks later
kingsindian9@reddit
This is amazing - congrats.
BoopingBurrito@reddit
When I was coming towards the end of Uni I had made a provisional agreement with my parents that they'd fund a Masters for me with an interest free loan. I'd picked one out, that'd be a good start into HR, which I thought was a solidly stable corporate career path.
Just before I graduated, my parents loaned most of their savings to my uncle to try and help him save his business, and were unable to follow through on our agreement.
I was, of course, really annoyed. But I've ended up going down a different career path, which I enjoy a lot more than I think I would an HR role, and earning a lot more than I probably would be in HR as well.
buginarugsnug@reddit
I desperately wanted to do a PhD in Egyptology in Liverpool after finishing my Masters there. There was just no way I could make the finances work, I’d missed scholarship applications and they were incredibly hard to win anyway. I had to move back in with my parents in rural North Yorkshire to get on my feet and started a new job. A week after I started my job and a month after I’d moved back home I met my now fiancé. I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I never met him. I still want to do the PhD, but I’m making sure I save enough for it first.
Slothjitzu@reddit
I once really wanted a promotion in work. It was basically from one sales role to another, in a new product line opening up in the business. The comms were massive so my bonus would have grown by like 50% if I had a similar level of performance.
I didn't get it. My boss was a bit of a prick and he said afterwards that they actually wanted me but he rejected the proposed transfer and that it was "for my own good".
I was livid and I stewed on it for months, until people I knew on the new department reported back how impossible it was and how they wre struggling to make any sales. They were constantly under pressure and the department folded entirely in like 8 months, with most of the staff being made redundant.
It was then that my boss told me that this was basically a product that one of our useless directors thought was a great idea, but none of the floor managers wanted to touch it because they knew it would be shit. So she staked her reputation on it and tried to run a sales floor with zero experience herself, on a product that everyone with experience thought would tank.
My boss basically knew how this was all going to play out and essentially made sure I wasn't near it when it all blew up.
polishprocessors@reddit
My first girlfriend.
Navy_Rum@reddit
It’s not the Citizen Kane of stories but I believe I can contribute:
My work contract ended in the pandemic. I spent weeks desperately applying for jobs in my industry - and to adjacent industries where I had transferable skills - and, despite a few interviews, nothing was happening. I took a 3 month temp job in a shop to ensure I could pay my rent, which I was a completely left-field vocation compared to what I usually do. This is where I met my now partner. We are now living together and both in new jobs that match our qualifications and work experience.
dinkidoo7693@reddit
I was offered a free ticket to see Ariana Grande in Manchester. It was a great seat close to the stage. I couldn’t get a babysitter. On the day of the concert my friends had travel issues (first train was hugely delayed so no chance of getting the connecting train) and they also ended up not going. We all felt a bit shit about missing out until what actually happened that night.
Imagirl48@reddit
I’m in the U.S, but have always liked the Garth Brooks song “Unanswered Prayers” for the same reason.
screwfusdufusrufus@reddit
Isn’t he a bit risky round kids?
Katstronaut@reddit (OP)
This has admittedly soured the quote a bit for me
Physical-Bear2156@reddit
When I first started out after university, a friend and I both applied for a vacancy at a big electronics company. He was accepted, but I was not.
Fortunately, I already had a job offer from another firm in the industry, so failing the interview was a disappointment rather than a crisis. My friend being successful did irritate, though.
The contract my friend was hired for was cancelled by the government three weeks after he started work, and he was given four weeks' notice. The job I accepted resulted in my staying with that employer for over 20 years and having a pretty exciting career working around the world.
Outside-Independence@reddit
Nearly moved to LA in 93/94 for my dad's work. 16yr-old skateboarder me was gutted to not be moving to California. 47yr-old me is eternally grateful I didn't!
Moist-Writing5955@reddit
Things didn't work out with a woman I was in love with. Worked on myself, read a lot about philosophy and general self-improvement. Second best thing to happen to me (after my son being born, which also started out as an 'oh no' moment).
CoffeeIgnoramus@reddit
Lost out on a house (fuck estate agents). 3 months later we got a house the same size/quality much closer to the city centre for the same price and this one had a much bigger garden and in a street known for being one of the nicest communities.
Also more out of choice but even if I want something badly, I always walk away if it doesn't quite feel right.
For example, I've always bought my cars second hand and pretty much have always walked away from the first few I see and I've ALWAYS found a better one for the same price or lower.
My proudest one was a car that was going for about £8k at the time and I only found them with 45K-60K miles on the clock. All had dents and dings. After walking away from loads, I finally found one for £6k and 14k miles on the clock. Although not mine anymore, It's still in my family and doing well 10 years on!
BarracudaUnlucky8584@reddit
Applied for an internal role didn't get it, then got promoted to that same salary and that entire team got made redundant!
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