For the gen-Xers that didn’t fit in…
Posted by Natural_Towel4894@reddit | GenX | View on Reddit | 206 comments
This is for the ones that stood out or maybe you felt like you were in the wrong place.
I remember growing up in a place where I didn’t fit in. I didnt like the general culture , music and general everyday life of where I grew up. I liked 80’s music, obscure shows and non popular general things in comparison to the norm there. I of course was ridiculed for being “different”. I hid my likes and tried to fit in ….but eventually decided to say “fuck it”.
Got into music …deep in. Discovered the smiths, the cure, thrash metal, obsecure 70’s rock bands, cult movies etc. I decided to go so far away from the norm there to stick the middle finger at them. My version of a silent rebellion. I finally got to find myself through challenging the norm. It was cathartic. This really changed my perspective on life vs the people around me.
Any of you misfits have any similar experiences through not fitting in ?
OwlRare9948@reddit
NO ONE in my friend groups were ever into the same things I was. I grew up listening to the Beatles and 70's rock. My friends were listening to Cyndi Lauper, I was rocking out to CCR. I finally stopped worrying about what people though when I was 16 and discovered a few new and \~real\~ friends around that time.
Helenesdottir@reddit
Never did, never will. I was the girl who read Narnia and loved Star Trek. I was bitten by the astronomy bug at 6 and at 18 was the only female astrophysics student at my university. I was bullied out of the program. I've been bullied, teased, harassed and ostracized everywhere I've gone. I am a shape that fits nowhere. I don't care anymore. I am me and I will enjoy, study, read, and do what I like, as long as it doesn't harm others.
CaligoAccedito@reddit
Wild! I was the only 2nd grader who wanted to be an astrophysicist! Unfortunately, that didn't pan out for me, but I love that you went for it. Sorry it turned out bad.
RogerClyneIsAGod2@reddit
In elementary school I LOVED astronomy but once I learned there was a LOT of complicated math involved I tossed that dream in the trash. I'm terrible at math but some of that was due to shitty teachers.
taueret@reddit
I feel like i was born too soon...i was so lonely as a LOTR reading, stargazing nerdy 8 year old girl in a rural town in the '70s. The internet would have brought me to my tribe and i would have had friends who liked what i liked instead of bullying me so i dumbed it down and eventually became dumb for real.
Helenesdottir@reddit
The smart you is still in there. Sometimes we have to be the supportive community we needed. By ourselves for ourselves. Tell her she is competent!
taueret@reddit
I'm ok, I've done fine. But i think i could have done ANYTHING if Id had the internet to learn from and communicate thru. Oh well, it is what it is, and I make the most of the wonders at our fingertips now!
soyverde@reddit
I’m not surprised about you being bullied out of a STEM field, but fuck everything about that.
Frosty-Sorbet3698@reddit
Same comment here. Never did, never will. I don't give a fuck about what people think about me. They have always judged me without ever knowing me.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Yeah …where I was from if you were smart and had hope, they would bully you due to the fact you would rise above everyone. They wanted you to be on the same level as them…..I stupidly and immaturely went that route due to lack of support and confidence .
JKnott1@reddit
I spoke with an industrial psychologist recently and was told there is a massive amount of toxicity in aerospace. Lot of bros running these places. You may have dodged a bullet.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
For me ….i was a smart kid that loved to read and think about the impossible…..my parents went through a 15 “divorce” …..my brother and I were in the fall out…..I knew deep down ….i wasn’t going to college or amount to anything due to lack of support from my parents….that was tough to recover from
Jsmith2127@reddit
I was into a lot of the main stream pop culture, but I was and still am a huge Scifi need. Both reading, and watching.
I currently am in a D&D campaign with my husband, youngest son, and some friends.
I think it was deemed weirder for girls to be into stuff like that, especially in the 70s and 80s
TakeMeToThePielot@reddit
I’m so sorry. The world needs more astrophysicists not fewer. 😔
immersemeinnature@reddit
"Bullied out of astrophysics." This really boils my blood. Are you doing that now? Or something like it?
Helenesdottir@reddit
I wish. I eventually became an accountant, doing budgets, admin, and even property management, before ending up as support staff at the same university. I threw my all into encouraging students until retirement in 2019.
Note to all: never tell a female student she's a 'black hole'.
immersemeinnature@reddit
Dang. It's heartbreaking and pisses me off. I wanted to be a cellular biologist but was not taken seriously by any of my teachers (highschool) and had some pretty serious math anxiety so I gave up.
I'm so glad to hear you were able to encourage others 💚 thank you for sharing.
Helenesdottir@reddit
You could have made a difference in so much if you'd been encouraged. That breaks my heart.
immersemeinnature@reddit
Yes. We all could have love. I hope it's changed. I'm hoping Gen Z will be different. Many blessings and good days to you friend.
linuxgeekmama@reddit
Note to all: anyone who calls a female student a black hole, deserves to be thrown into an actual black hole. The singularity might vomit them out, for being so vile. Which would be fun to see.
Helenesdottir@reddit
You made me laugh. I appreciate the sentiment.
linuxgeekmama@reddit
Fuck everybody who bullied you out of the astrophysics program. I hope all their papers get rejected, and they get denied tenure.
immersemeinnature@reddit
I commented to her too because that just is such a vile thing that so many science and tech loving girls have to put up with
Helenesdottir@reddit
It's my only regret - that I didn't stand up to them.
Bright_Guest_2137@reddit
I became a huge lover of Star Trek TOS in the 80s. It used to come on Saturday nights after the news. I think I recorded all of them to VHS. Still love it, TNG, Voyager, etc.
jk_pens@reddit
Wow, if I had known you in high school, I would’ve probably had a massive crush on you
linuxgeekmama@reddit
I might have too, and I’m mostly straight. u/Helenesdottir just sounds awesome.
TK-385@reddit
Asian, non religious, only kid, latchkey kid who grew up in a middle class almost all white suburb back in the 80's to 90's. I ended up hanging around the misfit white kids from the neighborhood. Now the same suburb is less white.
john-th3448@reddit
There were different subcultures in my middle school (I think for the Americans that's a combination of high school and college). The dominant culture was "spoiled children from rich parents", and I was in the "prog rock lovers from normal parents" group :-)
UpstairsCommittee894@reddit
American school system (at least around here) is Elementary Kindergarten through 5th, middle school 6th through 8th, and high school 9th through 12th, Then you go to college.
jk_pens@reddit
Some places in the US have elementary through 6th and middle school aka intermediate school is just 7&8.
TK-385@reddit
That's how it was where I lived in the US. It was kindergarten, elementary: 1 to 6, junior high: 7 & 8, and high school: 9 to 12.
john-th3448@reddit
Yes, we only have primary school, middle school, and then off to university or learning a trade.
Substantial_Dog3544@reddit
We had elementary K-4, middle school 5-6, jr high 7-8, and high school 9-12.
marshfield00@reddit
yup. this has been my experience too. the lame top 40 stations in my red state town drove me insane. i grew up in small red state town and attended catholic school so hipness wasn't really on the menu. I remember my one tether to the outside world was Rolling Stone (a mag I generally loathe. I was totally a Spin guy. Had a complete collection at one point.). If you remember on the very last page in a tiny corner there was what they called College Radio chart.
when all the kiddos get nostalgic for the 80s I have to remind them it was a terrible time to be weird. Fuck Reagan. and yuppies and izod and turned-up collars. fuck 'em all.
Lemmy_Axe_U_Sumphin@reddit
It’s Reddit so yeah that’s probably half the people on this sub.
GreatGreenGobbo@reddit
Then there's the 25% with Michael Jackson and Phil Collins.
And the final 25% with Iron Maiden, Van Halen and Guns n Roses.
arlmwl@reddit
And a lot of us with a smattering of everything.
Negative_Corner6722@reddit
I’m in that boat. I had my iPod on shuffle in my car a few years ago and one of my friends said ‘this mix is insane’ after it played The Beach Boys, Metallica, Snoop, Alan Jackson, Disturbed, and then something classical. Trying to pass this love of music down.
arlmwl@reddit
Ha! I hear you. I listen to a lot of stuff I scoffed at when I was younger.
These days I'm trying to discover new Jazz artists.
I mean, I love some Miles Davis, but there's only so many times I can listen to Kind of Blue.
RevereTheAughra@reddit
Try Miles Davis' Sketches of Spain :)
Salty_Pancakes@reddit
You gotta get to the crazy electric Miles stuff from 1968/69 to about 1975. Miles had some great bands through the years but that period he was just off the wall. Like He Love Him Madly (excerpt). Throw some headphones on and give it a whirl. Starts quiet but get's going around the 2 minute mark.
And then all the offshoots bands from folks who played with Miles like Mahavishnu Orchestra, Weather Report, Return to Forever. That era for jazz fusion was packed to the gills with great stuff before the smooth jazz came on the scene in the later 70s.
Like, you know Bob James? Wrote the theme song for Taxi. Before that he was doing stuff like this bombastic jazz version of Mussorgsky's Night On Bald Mountain from 1974.
Sorry lol. I dig this era in fusion.
arlmwl@reddit
Weather Report and Brand-X are both great early jazz/rock fusion.
um_like_whatever@reddit
That's my kind of playlist! Fist bump 🤜
Negative_Corner6722@reddit
🤛🏻 back at you, internet stranger with excellent taste.
AntonChekov1@reddit
Under your username it says "class of 1993" How did you get that ?
Negative_Corner6722@reddit
Go to r/GenX (can’t do it from the comments). Hit the three dots in the upper right and choose Change User Flair. There’s one that says Edit this to make your own, choose that, then hit Edit in the upper right and put what you want. Apply and enjoy your brand new flair.
AntonChekov1@reddit
Thanks
ZestycloseDinner1713@reddit
Thanks!
AntonChekov1@reddit
Test
TangledUpPuppeteer@reddit
This was always an issue. This was what made people think I was weird. You can absolutely rock out to Michael Jackson, then turn around and blast country, folk, heavy metal, rock and roll, and blues. Why can’t you? Who says that’s not allowed? A bunch of people who “like what they like” say it, good for them. I like what I like and they won’t limit me.
That was my childhood. Other people trying to force me to choose. I can’t like Madonna and Elvis for some reason, that was against the law. It was also criminal to like Bob Dylan and the Beatles. It’s all a bunch of hokum.
To this day, I like most music and will continue to. That’s just how it goes. I don’t have to choose at all, and if you live your life in one lane, I wish you the best, but no thanks!
Salty_Pancakes@reddit
And don't forget the Grateful Dead. Like when I was in college in the early 90s, and they were massive. But also just hanging out in the background. Like Touch of Grey was in '87 so that wasn't really in rotation. Didn't really see them on the radio all that much but they were the highest grossing tour in 1991 and then again in 1993.
Everyone listened to everything, but when the dead came within 700ish miles of us, we were on our way lol.
Ima-Derpi@reddit
The circus before the show was the best part. I mean, out in the parking lot if you didn't get lost and forget why you were there.
GreatGreenGobbo@reddit
I'm in Canada. Grateful Dead is a US thing. Nobody cared about them in my orbit.
Salty_Pancakes@reddit
Yeah, it's a shame they didn't play Canada more. Or Europe. They were a great show.
All those festival tours like Horde and Lollapalooza were based on how they did their tours. And then Phish came in and picked up where they left off when Jerry died.
dfh-1@reddit
I'd be the one with a playlist covering everything from Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart to Weird Al Yankovic. 😎
Ok-Cauliflower-3129@reddit
Don't forget Metallica, back when they still kicked ass !!!
Moved up to central Pennsylvania for a year and the principle called my parents all in a huff thinking I was a devil worshiper because I listened to them !!! 😂
Had the long hair, Levi's jeans, jean jacket and concert shirts.
They acted like I was Satan himself. Me and the few group of freinds I had were DEFINITELY the outsiders.
Funny thing is, I was really good at football and it used to fuck with their heads that I was so different from the rest of the team.
Coaches loved me because I was the "wild man" of the team, lol.
kmweytx@reddit
This was me in HS! Jock girl who loved heavy metal and hung out with the “devil worshippers”. The satanic panic was real in rural Indiana. At one point my softball coach had a sit down with me to try and make me see the error in my ways. lol. And Metallica still can kick ass! The M72 tour shows are incredible.
Barlight@reddit
I liked them all
Ok_Sundae2107@reddit
I never embraced 80's music. In the 80s I listened to album rock music from the 70's and 80's.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Here’s to half of Reddit. Cheers guys!
Ok-Cauliflower-3129@reddit
I was going to say we all were like that, unless you were a jock or a preppy 😂
Awkward_Rutabaga5370@reddit
I'm a white guy and grew up in a relatively wealthy suburb. When I was 21 I moved to the hood hood. Like a place with a violent crime rate of 2,500/100,000 for many years in a row. Somehow I fit in there now and feel comfortable there .
Katerinaxoxo@reddit
Never fit in.
Wasn’t “cool” enough
Was smart but not “nerdy” smart
Played sports but was definitely not athletic or a jock
Played video games but wasn’t a “geek”
Not a band/drama “freak”
Was definitely a late bloomer, didn’t have a car, never really fit into any group or genre even though I had friends in each group.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Sounds like we were the same.
Katerinaxoxo@reddit
Haha probably!!
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Sounds like we were the same.
Frogbonz2020@reddit
Yup! Grew up in Utah and was not/still not Mormon. Just for context that is like being a leper.
Never was interested in sports. Still not interested in sports. Which as an adult man seems to make me still an outcast of sorts. When I hear guys talking about their fantasy football teams and I tell them that it sounds like a D&D fan talking about level 18 paladin they tend to get all butthurt. I even made the mistake of equating a sports fan getting super emotional about a game on tv being similar to a cuckold husband watching his wife get railed and having no control over the outcome. Which got me kicked out of a sports bar.
Anyway, I have accepted being different my whole life. I seem to be genuinely happier than most guys my age and I call that a win.
JagerMeisterChief@reddit
Had the same non-mormon in Utah experience. Soon as the neighborhood kids found out I was not part of "The Church" they weren't allowed to play with me and told me I was going to hell. That same year I got coke bottle glasses and became a nerd to add an extra layer to being an outcast. But made it through with, books, music, video games and cable TV (which all of the church kids were not allowed to partake of) Life began after high school and has turned out pretty great.
Frogbonz2020@reddit
I left after HS graduation and never looked back. Best decision I could have made at 18.
Life has been pretty amazing since.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Yeah nice about the comment to the sports guy. I hate team sports with a passion. Don’t understand why coaches get paid more than teachers at universities….crazy.
atomic4u@reddit
Weird or not… GenX had a good time. I don’t want to compare…I just want to keep living and enjoying! Hope you are having a blast too!😄
Breklin76@reddit
virtualadept@reddit
Never fit in, still don't. When I was in the hospital (long story) I decided that I was going to do things on my terms and fuck everybody else's expectations.
I like to think I'm doing pretty well.
HermioneMarch@reddit
It’s why I spent middle school with my nose in a book. And high school in my room listening to music made by people weirder than I. And no, I don’t regret it.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Me also now. I have this eclectic collection of music that holds deep love and memories to. And that’s what kept me going.
Inevitable-Grocery17@reddit
I was into classic “nerd” stuff like MtG and Tolkien before it got cool, but also played sports. Was not really accepted (and occasionally just straight up disrespected) by either group because of my affiliation with the other. People are rigid. Is what it is 🤷🏻♂️
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Used to love d&d ….now it’s popular,.,lol
Inevitable-Grocery17@reddit
Oh yeah, for sure! It’s kind of interesting to see the shift of all the things I got shit for enjoying become not only cool, but essentially ubiquitous in society. That’s not to say people aren’t still opinionated and often unnecessarily mean or dismissive about hobbies, but people just like to hate 🤷🏻♂️
sativa420wife@reddit
I left where I grew up four months after graduation. 1994
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Took me 6 years to leave after I graduated….i really don’t wanna live there again.
mesablueforest@reddit
I graduated in 94, the class of 91 were fkn terrible people aside from like 3 punk kids, that befriended me. Class of 92 were marginally better. Class of 93 had more alternatives and my class had a few more. In jr high I had been rejected by a group of girls so that's when my outsider journey began. Found another girl then another and we were our own group.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
For me it was musicians . Music saved my life. If I didn’t discover music and playing guitar….i would have hanged myself. I finally found my group…..
mesablueforest@reddit
Definitely music had/has a big big big big part of my life. My parents started it with classic rock, I took classical piano, then 7th grade had the influence of my bf's older sister, plus Headbangers ball and 120 minutes.
tmphaedrus13@reddit
Gay, intellectually gifted, undiagnosed adhd, grew up in rural northern New York State. You can imagine how well I fit in. 🙄
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
I was a metalhead, music geek living in Hawaii with Hawaiian music and basically Polynesian rednecks everywhere
emax4@reddit
I got bullied, and like today, adults hardly did anything. No friends in school no matter how hard I tried to fit in, but not close enough where people would invite me to things.
When Facebook came about I reconnected with some, but as you grow older you see others have families and other obligations, and it's harder to get into someone's inner circle of friends. So this past November I deleted Facebook. I also recall liking a crush then becoming sad/upset when she rejected me in college. We still had funny times before and after where the positive outweighed the negative. Years later the negative came up, so that reinforced that it's better to be forgotten than remembered.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Yeah deleting Facebook this month…also finally gonna burn my yearbook. …I think I actually message one person from that era
emax4@reddit
I forgot about yearbooks. I gave those away to a former friend over a decade ago.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Next time I have bbq I am burning mine….the only reason I kept it was it was the only picture I took of myself in high school.
squirtloaf@reddit
"Discovered the smiths, the cure, thrash metal, obsecure 70’s rock bands, cult movies etc."
I mean, I thought this was the normal Gen X path..?
I did not fit in where I grew up, so I left and did not fit in a new place in a different way.
"Fitting in" is just not possible for me for some reason (I seem to have different priorities and value different things from the mainstream of humanity), so I have become a person who fits in by being singular. People know me as the only one of me, and that is my place.
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
Not for me . My area was only reggae , Hawaiian music and top 40 . Anything outside of that was headbangers ball 120 minutes or you had a friend that listens to it. It was impossible to find anything
ManUp57@reddit
My philosophy here is; Be the exclusive club your looking for other to join. If they pass your standards.
um_like_whatever@reddit
Cool!
Humorous counterpoint. As Groucho Marx once said "I wouldn't want to belong to a club that would have me as a member". Now how would that combine with your idea lol. It'd be the sort of paradox to melt a computers brain.
ManUp57@reddit
The joke there was that he was Jewish. Get it?
um_like_whatever@reddit
I didn't think of it in those terms I must confess!
dreaminginteal@reddit
I think it was a small minority of people who actually felt like they fit in. I'm pretty sure none of my friends did.
Green-Walk-1806@reddit
6th grade is when I discovered Black Flag. It changed my life and I never looked back..
patrickwilliam69@reddit
I came out in 1985, and I really didn't go to high school after that. Because everyone found out and it was just easier to move on. So in 1987I hit the big city and experienced the tail end of the era before AIDS really hit and man, What a wonderful and magical experience those gay bars were, and that will never be captured again
d2r_freak@reddit
I think this is true for many of us. I grew up in a rust belt small town, even the wealthy people were poor. Heavy country music area, very working man town.
Was early into metal, maiden, sabbath, Dio, Jpriest etc
Then into very early rem/u2
I got into the alternative music scene, skateboarding, some drugs, shenanigans. Still love my smiths, new order, joy division, Sex Pistols, pil.
After than came to industrial (meat beat manifesto, tkk, kmfdm, nitzer ebb) and electronic
I left that town as soon as I could, went as far west as possible to find that promised land of freedom and acceptance. Of course, when I got to California the people were anything but kind. It was like moving into a John Hughes move where even the kids from the wrong side of the tracks looked down on me.
It’s moments like that which galvanized what being gen X was all about. I suppose I could’ve capped on myself and my upbringing to fit in- but I was never good at self hate as a way to please others.
The funny thing about gen x is that we are the oldest generation to never have a president from our age group. I’ve never had an xer to vote for because the boomers refused to let anyone take the leas after they should have retired and let us have our turn. They still won’t do it, they won’t even retire because they don’t want gen x to make decisions at all.
I always disliked the Beatles, but I never understood why until I spent time with the boomers. They ruin everything.
I know this turned into a generational rant, apologies
um_like_whatever@reddit
Early REM is amazing!! Though i was late to that party. I also went through a Judas Priest phase. But my favorite band was Journey.
Am I a weirdo lol?
d2r_freak@reddit
Journey is pretty good - I used to play that Atari video game “journey escape” that cracked me up.
Early rem was so good. If you check out the album “dead letter office” their first ep “chronic town” was made part of the release. Songs like carnival of sorts and wolves lower are stellar- can barely understand stipe there bbut I listen to them all the time :)
EulenMond@reddit
I was basically the girl version of Eddie from Stranger Things and an all black wearing, Slayer listening, D&D playing metalhead went over really well in the small ultra conservative Christian town in Alabama that I grew up in.
EulenMond@reddit
I was basically the girl version of Eddie from Stranger Things and an all black wearing, Slayer listening, D&D playing metalhead went over really well in the small ultra conservative Christian town in Alabama that I grew up in.
Ima-Derpi@reddit
I really would have liked to fit in for my childhood, I was one of those weird kids with a single parent stuck in the 60s - no TV, no junk food, anticonsumption, didn't even celebrate holidays, "we didn't have much but we had each other and that was the worst part." I don't know who said that but it was so true of my family. It did, however, give me the ability to entertain myself and develop patience and self awareness and a knack for being able to fix things and repurpose things and be able to taste subtle flavors. It also helped me to decide not to get into woowoo things including going to church and believing in half baked weirdness. Honestly I knew quite a few kids from similar backgrounds as a kid and we laughed so hard at each other and our stupid parents and their crazy ideas and our clothes and food. And then cried a little because other people thought we were weird and we got called hippies everywhere we went. Thats why when I went out on my own I did everything I could to experience all the stuff I had been told not to.Got into music and drugs and drinking and metal and very endorphin enducing dangerous sports I don't remember all of that but I survived it. And here I am a boring middle aged mom of 3 adults trying to shut off Reddit and do my chores for the day.
Wooden-Glove-2384@reddit
Yep.
Still out of step.
Still DNGAF
CaptMerrillStubing@reddit
> Discovered the smiths, the cure, thrash metal, obscure 70’s rock bands, cult movies etc.
This was all highly normal and very accepted where I grew up in Canada.
Where were you?
Natural_Towel4894@reddit (OP)
I grew up in Hawaii….in a small shitty town. they all liked reggae or Hawaiian music. Rock and anything with guitar was shunned …you got your ass kicked if you played anything with a loud guitar.
cassinglemalt@reddit
Not OP, but in my small New England town they generally liked "both kinds" of music--classic rock AND hair metal. So yeah I was a Smiths and REM etc weirdo
sixtyfoursqrs@reddit
Can we be friends lol.
I transplanted to a relatively poor rural town where Country Music reigned supreme. I was into Sabbath/RUSH/Hair Metal/ etc… I Don’t hunt or fish which were the main hobbies of the locals. There was a bowling alley, an ice cream shop with one foosball table. A pool hall with 6 tables that was frequented by folks my age now. Me and a few other like-minded spent most of our time in the woods or on a dirt road smoking weed and drinking.
sugarhillboss@reddit
I had to write a masters thesis for my MFA Part of the concept was tied up in how I had to live a double life just to get by. Be willing to punch and get punched and then go home to ivy league hippies who were non violent. Played sports and watched games on tv just to have enough know how to blend in then spend the weekend wandering art museums with Aunts and Uncles who were famous artists. Honestly it has served me well being a bit of a chameleon.
HumbleXerxses@reddit
110%! I did the same. Got deep into punk rock, metal, skateboards, etc
Most GenX were trendy ass bullies. Now they try to pretend they were one of us. Getting piercings, dying their hair, tattoos, oh, ad OF COURSE they're punk rock too. They love the Ramones and wear their Walmart misfits tshirts.
NostalgicRetro73@reddit
I knew I didn't fit in, so I gave a big FU to mostly everyone & stayed introverted. At lunch I read. Though when my peers passed by me and said hi, I said hi back, wishing deep down it was more than just a hi every day. I was born with no hands & a speech impediment, so I knew early on around 5th grade something was changing. Before 5th grade, recess was choose a kid and play with them regardless of their reputation, their looks, etc, as long as they were fun, who cared. After 5th grade, it got seriously into groups, with high school being the peak of the groupies. The popular, the smarts, the goth, the outsiders, and those who didn't fit into any, which basically were the mentally disabled, the deaf hung around the other deaf students, & I just didn't really care & read at lunch & walked to my classes & tried to learn stuff. I did have conversations with the teachers though, they seemed more mature than the people my age were in school.
WillaLane@reddit
I never really felt like I wasn’t a complete freak until I was in my 20s. I moved 1000s of miles from my family and every one I knew so I could be myself. Being an artist in a family full of professionals has come with a lot of shaming. Truthfully the internet helped a lot too, just when you think you’re weird, you either find your people or find people even weirder
velvet42@reddit
I wasn't the weirdest kid in school, but I did get voted "most unique" in my senior yearbook. I spent my childhood trying to figure out how to be "normal", and just not being very good at it, so at some point I stopped trying. Towards the end of high school, I decided why not actively embrace it? If I liked something, I wore it, it didn't matter if it was a polyester, butterfly collared shirt that was my mom's in the 70s, or black lipstick and fishnets. If I liked some piece of music, I listened to it, it didn't matter if it was a month, or 25 years, or 250 years old.
In my mid-20s, some guy who was still oddly preoccupied with labeling people referred to me in mock-consternation as a "punk-rock/hippie/goth chick" and I kind of love that
ChiliAndRamen@reddit
I was playing D&D during the “satanic panic” of the eighties. I let a Christian classmate “borrow” one of my books, because I thought he was curious. Nope he burnt it in a book burning, he never understood why I called him thief from then on.
FlopShanoobie@reddit
Marching band president. Future Problem Solvers and Odyssey of the Mind teams. Way too into Star Wars. Star Trek fan since I was a baby. Scared of girls. Skinny. Poor. Discovered the Pixies in 1990. Started playing guitar. Started a band. Saw Pavement and Mudhoney. Started wearing thrift shop clothes. Graduated in ‘93 while dating the drill team captain. DGAF.
Bagoong4Lyfe@reddit
I never fit in and still don't. As a consequence, I am fiercely independent.
“A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.”
― Robert A. Heinlein
allflour@reddit
Sounds like me lol. I found a spouse but never my people.
PhotographsWithFilm@reddit
I went to a rural school in a rural area.
And I sucked at sport.....
There is a saying about how I perceive how others thought of me (probably not politically correct now):
"He doesn't like football? Is he some sort of poofter?"
So, yeah, I didn't fit in. In a way, I still don't
creyn6576@reddit
“Did you see that ludicrous display last night?” -Moss
clickinanddraggin@reddit
"The thing about Arsenal is that they always try to walk it in."
velvet42@reddit
r/unexpecteditcrowd
Severe_Eggplant_7747@reddit
My high school girlfriend’s dad (who liked me actually) suspected that I was a communist because I wasn’t into sports. He didn’t even see me wearing my Lenin t-shirt!
TheGreenLentil666@reddit
Similar but was a musician to boot. To this day I just don’t fit in, too nerdy to hang with musicians, too creative to hang with nerds, etc.
The older I get the more lonely I become. Not sure if that’s just me or my environment though.
LASER_Dude_PEW@reddit
I am all about equilibrium and can fit in almost anywhere but when it comes down to it I don't really fit in anywhere apart from a very surface level. It's exhausting so I wander off alone a lot. Luckily I have a cool wife who mostly understands my quirks.
Musically I can listen to almost anything except for what is popular at the given moment. This is my life.
JJQuantum@reddit
We moved around a while when I was little and I became an introvert as a result. By the time I was in middle school we settled down but that didn’t change my not being overly social. In high school my friends were in various groups - band, popular kids, rich kids, loners, nerds, partiers, etc. but I never really fit in with any of the groups themselves. I was always just on the perimeter. The good thing is that I still have 3 friends from those days that I see quite often and the cliques are long gone.
LipsRedAsBlood@reddit
I was a band geek who joined Academic Decathlon and entered math competitions for fun. It somehow didn’t punch my ticket to popularity.
readingreddit4fun@reddit
Choir girl into theater whose drama coach refused to do musicals; Quiz Bowl team all 4 years (lovingly dubbed "Nerd Squad" by its members), into all the academic clubs (Future Business Leaders of America, marketing club, drama club, yearbook staff...you get it), and so deeply into "contemporary Christian" music (Amy Grant before she was secular, Michael W. Smith, Petra, etc.) that I didn't listen to anything main stream at all until my senior year of high school. Also in a rural area and not athletic in the least, didn't drink or smoke anything, so I had zero hopes of being cool with anyone but the church grannies. I spent a LOT of Saturday nights embroidering & crocheting stuff.
hmmmpf@reddit
I’ll one up you here. I was in orchestra and Academic Decathlon.
MangoPeachFuzz@reddit
Band geek, Academic Decathlon and Quiz Bowl.
Did not do math for fun and recreation, but did well enough in math.
Shockingly in my small, rural town I was not popular.
GreatGreenGobbo@reddit
"Demented and sad, but social."
cerealandcorgies@reddit
underrated movie quote
Professor-genXer@reddit
Me too except orchestra vs band. 🎶🤓
LipsRedAsBlood@reddit
We didn’t have orchestra (does that require strings?) but we had concert band, pep band, marching band and jazz band and I was in them all!
Professor-genXer@reddit
Orchestra is usually strings yes. A “full orchestra “ has woodwinds and brass too. I played in a full orchestra in college, it was sooooo cool 😍
wayyzor@reddit
I didn't fit in with the other kids who also didn't fit in, that's how hard I didn't fit in.
Haunting_Bottle7493@reddit
I was The Cure in a world of Springsteen. While everyone had high bangs, I shaved my head.
mindcontrol93@reddit
Punk rock changed my life.
Knut_Knoblauch@reddit
My brother, who is a late boomer, loved making fun of my 80's music and clothing choices. So what if I used Aqua Net to make my hair stand up tall. So what if my friends liked elf boots that Depeche Mode wore. We didn't care. We were 12 and discovered the fusion that was 80's music and clothes. Those damn short mens shorts where you were worried about a dong spotting are finally coming back for ill will. Oh yeah. Can keep going. My HS graduation (88) song was by Poison, the QB and Cheerleader did their thing. yeah the normal 80's for a weird as teen who liked computers, astronomy, dnd, and all the uncool shit in 1982,
attaboy_stampy@reddit
A little bit. I also had a really wide music interest compared to most of my friends - with a couple of exceptions. I liked the typcial late 80s stuff, but my friends were very hair metal guys. I liked some of that. And then some of my friends were into 70s stuff, Eagles Jimmy Buffet etc... I liked that. Then NONE of my friends were into rap music, and I was way into that. Run DMC, Beasties, Sir Mixalot (pre baby got back), PE. And by my senior year, I was into U2, REM, Pixies and shortly after that Sex Pistols, Ramones...
It was like I had my own secret mental super power that did nothing but make me feel better that I had a wide perspective and interest. I would never really have a friend who had such a wide variety of interests and musical tastes. Even now.
nycbaldman@reddit
I was the only punk in high-school.
Had a blue Mohawk while the rest of the school were affluent preppies and jocks. Spent most of my Sundays at CBGBs hardcore matinee.
I never needed people to like me and was perfectly content just being my self.
The leather jacket I made in 1985 is now proudly worn by 27yo son. It's now the family crest. Both my sons are into punk and hardcore. We often go to shows as a family and all jump in the pit.
I fit in just fine wherever I am.
mjh8212@reddit
I’m was a weird kid a weird teen and am currently a weird adult. I didn’t fit in anywhere but at the same time I had friends from different groups from jocks to burnouts. Living in a big city the way I look and dress doesn’t get stares or comments. I live in a small town and I really don’t fit in here. The older religious ladies gasp and clutch their pearls sometimes. I have piercings tattoos stretched ears an undercut and I love wearing black. It makes me laugh cause I’m not as extreme as some people I know.
shelli05014471@reddit
I was the girl listening to Iron Maiden when the others were drooling over Dian Duran.
grahsam@reddit
Even in sub cultures I don't fit in well. I'm nerdy but not quite that nerdy, I'm a musician that can't stand musicians, and I'm a gamer that doesn't understand most gamers. What I think about things never seems to match up with what others think about them.
idiotsluggage@reddit
Maybe that means you're just well rounded?
grahsam@reddit
Maybe? I dunno.
It's frustrating because I will get into something and end up with takes that don't mesh with the "community." After a while I get tired of being a square peg.
One of the biggest examples is being a musician. I've been writing music and playing shows for over 30 years, but God damn it do musicians and music industry people gross me out. It's all talk and bullshit and ego. It's also completely insulated from the rest of the world. Things that would never fly in a real business are normal with the music biz. And so many musicians are just flopping heads that yammer on endlessly while they try to impress you with their shows. I just can't, even though music is one of my passions.
UnknownPrimate@reddit
I've found that groups attract the same "group people" who mostly seem to be there for the power dynamic and to start drama.
Breakfastclub1991@reddit
Not being all the same and still getting along was my genX experience. I was a heavy metal football and baseball player. My brother called me a dumb jock. I hung out with people of all races and clicks. The coolest people were the different ones. 8th grade super punk girl next to me shaved her Mohawk off and was bald. I think I invented the 🤜 🤛 bump that day. IMO the preppy kids where the judgmental pricks. Why, because they were to afraid to be themselves.
Dear Mr Vernon…
one_bean_hahahaha@reddit
54 years old and I've been a weirdo my entire life. Still haven't figured things out so now I just live with it.
hamlet_d@reddit
I didn't fit in where I grew up (semi rural) but my sophomore year we moved to a huge suburban area and I found people that liked these things. That was huge for me
OccamsYoyo@reddit
I was the same. Hated, hated, hated every year of the ‘80s past 1986. Things started changing when I discovered Metallica and Pink Floyd in eleventh grade, followed by a bunch of classic rock bands.
W-Stuart@reddit
You described me perfectly. Still don’t fit in. Don’t want to.
SoberDWTX@reddit
I never felt accepted. I was a kid that was shuttled around from home to home so I never really made lifelong friends in school. I was always the new kid. I got into punk rock, rock, new wave, goth. Weeks awa To this day, I say “David Bowie saved my life”
Extra_Engineering996@reddit
Never once, did I fit in, until about 1979 when I found punk. School was horrible in general, at all times. My parents paid too much attention to my brother, basically ignorning me.
Found punk, and I found home. I'm 64 and I still don't fit in with the 'normie' things people my age do. My music keeps getting harder, my tattoos multiply, and my hair is never one color for very long.
But I am accepted and loved by my husband, my kids, and a few close friends. Everyone else can FTFO.
NefariousnessOther28@reddit
For sure! I'm 51 now and never felt i fit in anywhere, and I still feel the same. I fell in love with all the alternative music, even some hardcore back in the day.
Fickle-Shop-691@reddit
Being gay in a small logging town in SW Washington late u0s, early 80s, was pretty hard. Joined the Navy as early as I could, then got kicked out for being gay, lol. Frying pan, fire... best thing I ever did, though. Got the hell out of that place, so it was worth it.
Zealousideal-Move-25@reddit
Um, yeah. I still feel like I dont fit in.
DaGeekGamer@reddit
Band geek who grew up listening to my parents 8 tracks and records. Bit by the reading bug at 4. Was called "Dr. Spock" by ignorant kids because I couldn't help myself and corrected improper word usage and terrible grammar.
It took me until I was 30 before my skin grew thick enough to not give a fuck. In my 50s I still sometimes have to remind myself.
Werilwind@reddit
I was called Mrs Spock in elementary school due to my vocabulary.
Helped on the SAT.
Karfedix_of_Pain@reddit
I'm a neurodivergent, nonbinary, queer weirdo who grew up in a small Minnesota town in the '80s.
I learned to mask and closet really fast.
Back then we didn't really accommodate any kind of neurodivergence. We didn't do a lot of assistance or support or understanding. You could either act "normal" enough to sit in class with the other kids... Or you got shipped off to "special education" with every other problem-child. So I masked.
Back then it wasn't really OK to be queer in any way. I was constantly bullied. I got called names. And it wasn't just the other students... I'll never forget a teacher telling me to "quit acting like a sissy" and "grow a pair". So, of course, I closeted.
I seriously thought there was something fundamentally wrong with me for the longest time. Thought I was broken.
I really didn't see a future for myself. I'd think about the rest of my life... Finish up highschool, go to college, get a job... And, what? Just work all day every day because that's what you do? Spend my whole life hiding and pretending so I didn't get beaten or bullied or arrested or whatever? Why? What's the point?
The Internet genuinely saved my life. I started working at a tiny little local ISP in the '90s... Got online... Got on USENET and IRC and met other people like me. Other weirdos. Made friends. Learned that there could actually be a future for me.
GracieThunders@reddit
There was the cocaine 80's and then there was the quaalude 80’s, I wasn't in tune with either one
OldBanjoFrog@reddit
Still don’t fit in. Cheers friends!
YouHadMeAtDisgusting@reddit
Oh yeah, I was a square peg. For one, having been born with clubfoot, I had multiple surgeries before age five so I could walk correctly. I had corrective shoes for a few years there, and then always had a slight limp. Additionally, I had a speech impediment that until it mostly ironed out, made me extremely self conscious.
I was an undiagnosed autistic. I preferred to read and sit by myself or hang out with one friend in early years, and I remember even teachers publicly embarrassing me for this and my other autistic qualities. We were a poor family in a pretty wealthy area, so I remember being bullied for my hand me downs and cheap shoes. I had no self confidence whatsoever.
I did become more outgoing in middle school and beyond. We moved to a more humble area. I become a varsity swimmer in high school, which elevated my social standing slightly, and I had friends from all social groups then. I took on various emo/punk rock/metal/beach girl personas until I found the mix that evolved into me. I am a music lover of almost everything, especially from that era.
I still feel deeply for anyone bullied and demeaned because of my early life and other experiences.
xtiaaneubaten@reddit
Yeah, I grew up in a small town. Moved to a big city, got a rib pierced and a sleve tat and hit the gay bathouses and industrial clubs...
MonkeyboyK72@reddit
Sorry. I feel dumb, but how does one pierce a rib?
xtiaaneubaten@reddit
I was joking about how for a while there the piercing scene was competitive and only the most hardcore were truly cool.
MonkeyboyK72@reddit
Gotcha. Thanks for explaining.
Fluid-Safety-1536@reddit
My senior year I moved with my mom from Chicago to a small town in Texas that didn't even allow dancing. The local minister convinced the city council to outlaw it. I was able to get that overturned though.
Over-Director-4986@reddit
Kick off your Sunday shoes!
Did you know Footloose was based on a real story that went down in Oklahoma?
_ism_@reddit
Yeah. Turns out i'm autistic and never knew until middle age. I tried SO HARD and people just didn't react to me the same as other kids no matter how much I tried to blend in. At some point I turned it into a cope to act like I didnt' care and act rebellious of their social rules for me. I actually made a couple of friends when I began being more authentic and it turns out those friends were neurodivergent discovered in later adulthood too.
40Breath@reddit
Yup, skateboarding in the 80s wasn't cool. After a while, you'd think "Do an Ollie f@**ot" was my name. My 2 favorite bands are Slayer and the Smiths. I understand.
Alive-OVERTIIME-247@reddit
We moved 8 times and I went to 5 different schools by the time I was 18. Just when life was finally calming down, I'd get uprooted again. It did teach me to be adaptable and open to things (A guy in my art class introduced me to Dead Kennedys, to my mother's horror) and I got to experience a lot of cool things, but It took me a minute to find my place.
safety3rd@reddit
You were listening to 80s music in the 90s?
TheBariSax@reddit
I started out fine until we moved out of town, then back to a different part of town a year later. Going initially from city to small farm town sucked. Then when we came back in mid-grade school, even though I was back "home" it was a new school, new people, etc. I never really got in again after that.
By the time I got to my junior and high school years, I was in both band and sports, and had some nerdy interests. My presence in one clique made suspect in the other.
It wasn't until college that I truly found a group of friends that stuck through the years.
Nice_Cost_1375@reddit
I moved from Guam, where they had "kill haolie day", to Seoul at the age of 9. As a pale Irish-American, I never fit in. When I finally moved to Texas at 18, it was no better. I didn't really fit into American culture, or Korean culture, or anything.
I was a teachers' son, but went to school with the elite of Korean society' children, Ambassador's kids, and the offspring of high-level business executives sent to Korea.
Now I'm 53, and still don't fit in. In college, I drank way more than I should and enjoyed the American experience instead of studying. I barely passed with a history degree, so I got a job in the "restaurant arts".
Being a big liberal in blue-collar Texas keeps me from relating with many of my co-workers and moving out to the suburbs didn't help.
I went to the Mexican grocery store and found a tiny restaurant in the back that makes carnitas for the day laborers. I told my buddies about it online, the said "Were you the only white guy there?"
"Story of my life."
Head_Indication_9891@reddit
Where I grew up heavy metal was ubiquitous. It was almost like a cult. Any musical deviation in the small primarily white town that I grew up in was suspect. I decided in 8th grade that I really liked Run DMC and the Beastie Boys. I really got into hip hop and still am. I almost got beat up because I was playing L.L. Cool J from a boombox (I know a little on the head). I think I confused everyone a little bit,
PepsiOfWrath@reddit
Yep, wrote for a poorly published ‘zine which was mostly photocopies stapled like a book, was funny but ugly and too poor to dress counterculture so still dressed like a prep who’s parents exclusively shopped at garage sales.
blackpony04@reddit
As an awkward uncoordinated kid who had to wear special shoes that looked like dress shoes from 3rd to 5th grade while everyone else got to wear sneakers, I was constantly bullied growing up. I immersed myself into books and later music and honestly had very few friends.
My dad was transferred when I was in 10th grade, and it was that move that I thought was the end of my world that turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I went from a class of around 200 people I knew since kindergarten to a class of 1000 in a giant suburban Chicago school district. Instead of being a stranger in a strange land, suddenly I was with people who didn't know or care about my past and accepted me for being me. Friendships bloomed and when I went to college my self esteem was at an all time high and I never looked back.
I still love music and I read a ton, my library now numbering hundreds of books gently reminding me that I could always escape into them whenever I felt lost or out of place.
dazedUNDconfused42@reddit
Wow,almost like speaking to myself. I didn't really have a group until high school.
FistFullOfRavioli@reddit
I didn't fit in. I grew up in Brooklyn listening to oldies and country music and I feel it makes me feel like an old soul. I got into pop music in the 80's and then discovered Hair metal and classic rock and heavy metal. I got into grunge too but never forgot the other types of music. I played baseball but wasn't a jock. I was in the Honors program in High School but not a nerd. I was too poor to be a "Preppie" and I was very shy and had self-esteem issues in High School. I enjoyed being by myself and I still kind of do. I liked the cult and "B" movies as well growing up. I didn't take college seriously and I kind of regret that now but I have done OK in life compared to others.
missdawn1970@reddit
I grew up in the "poor" section of an affluent suburb. My teen years were like a John Hughes movie. I pretty much said "fuck it" from the time I realized I was different, and I rebelled and flaunted my differences.
tranquilrage73@reddit
Yeah. Growing up in the "slums" of a wealthy town is fantastic. I just kind of faded into the walls.
TwistedMemories@reddit
I was weird in that I was friends and accepted by a number of groups. Jocks, ok I was one the equipment managers for the football team. I was accepted and they stood up for us. I was also in the drama club, choir, journalism and was friends with the nerds.
I was friends with the cool kids, because I went to elementary and Jr. High with them. Most of the cool kids were on the student body, and I was accepted and helped to plan school events.
I knew some of the outcast as I would at times hangout with them at the smoking wall. It was actually a terraced area where the potheads and cig smokers hung out with.
Now, I wasn’t trying to be accepted by each of them or over extend myself, I just did what I wanted to do.
I can say that not many people, there were a few, were friends and accepted with so many different groups. I always had a couple of invitations to weekend parties.
Striking_Snail@reddit
I was the eternal "new kid", so I never fit in. Welfare clothes, no money, broken home, bullied everywhere I went. Until I wasn't. But that got me suspended for fighting back, which led to us moving. Again.
TheFirst10000@reddit
I didn't quite fit in either (I suppose I still don't), but I think where we differ is that it wasn't like I was trying to challenge anything or anybody, or trying to make my existence a middle finger to everybody. I was just me. So yeah, I unironically liked some mainstream stuff, but I also liked a lot of stuff that either wasn't big where I lived, or that wasn't what people my age would've been listening to at the time, but it's not like it was some conscious choice; it was more something I was drawn to.
Sometimes the further you get into it the easier it is to find more stuff like it, and through that to also find people who are more likely to take you as you are. What I always found ironic is how many of the "misfits" were pretty gatekeepy about the things they liked, so I didn't even necessarily fit in with the people who didn't fit in.
MooPig48@reddit
I was absolutely lost. My mom was diagnosed with cancer when I was 6 and given 6 months too live but lived until I was 11. My parents were older parents. My dad had polio as a child so he was handicapped, braces, canes, sometimes a wheelchair. My mom also had paranoid schizophrenia, she was in and out of both regular and mental hospitals, and us girls were seriously neglected.
They brought grandma to “take care of us”. Problem was grandma was absolutely evil and I’m not exaggerating. I went into early puberty and she wouldn’t allow me to bathe. Once a week in no more than 3 inches of water. So I had acne, I smelled bad, and I was so ashamed I wore a coat with a hood over my greasy hair all the time. Add in me being super scrawny and you have a kid that doesn’t fit in and gets mercilessly bullied.
After mom died and grandma left of course it got somewhat better, as of course I was able to bathe and shower and groom. But we never moved or anything, so the damage was largely done, and the same people who teased me in elementary school and junior high kept it up through high school, though I did find a small group of friends who I loved.
Anyway.
Silver_Objective7144@reddit
At first yeah, then in 11th grade I started a hardcore/punk band and then I met girls - still didn’t lose virginity til I was 18
boringlesbian@reddit
Let’s see:
Gender nonconforming, athiest, lesbian in a small Bible Belt oil town. ✔️
Undiagnosed autistic. ✔️
Theatre kid. ✔️
UsherOfDestruction@reddit
I was too nerdy to fit in with the outcasts. I was too much of a rule breaker/questioner and weirdo to fit in with the nerds. I certainly wasn't with the popular kids or jocks. The theater and band kids kept to their own.
I just had a couple friends from different social groups but never hung out much with their groups.
IB4WTF@reddit
I never fit in, never had parental support, and never had the budget to follow any trends. Grade school was a wasteland of boredom and frustration. I couldn't do any extracurricular activities (budget and support), and the few other kids on my block might as well have lived on a different planet for how different we were. I just felt alone.
My wife gets on me about my lack of a social circle while failing to understand that I just can't relate to a lot of people. I understand what the benefits would be, but you can't just go out there and claim a tribe for yourself.
So, yeah, I still don't fit in.
sforza360@reddit
I feel this. I went to a Haircut 100 show in NYC and, of course, bought a concert t-shirt. Wore it a couple of days later to my high school and got called a "f*g" by just about all of the older students, provincial morons that they were. Whatever, fuck 'em.
kristenevol@reddit
I played the violin and lettered in.....orchestra LOL. High school (graduated in '89) was quite difficult. I loved the music, the fashion, the culture, but I was just a smart, but odd duck. I had a few friends, but I'm sure most people in my class would have a hard time remembering me (graduating class of 497).
Everything changed though when I got to college. Finally being smart and nerdy became a good thing.
With that said, I'd never trade my generation. If I could live a week back then, though, I'd dye my hair pink. I always wanted to do that so badly but being noticed was terrifying to me.
Academic_Airport_889@reddit
Misfit here — spent hours listening to records including the smiths and the alternative/ college radio stations - was teased for my clothing and earrings choices - i had a small group of friends and they were wonderful people - I never responded to the meanies and I am glad - old me would have answered but I think silence was the correct response
The funny part now is the smiths and cute are very popular with the mainstream teenage set these days - tik tok does have value
WeirdRip2834@reddit
When I was a little older, I would drive south a little to chase the radio waves from WBRU. Such good music. The signal wasn’t very strong.
Just posting this for nostalgia.
linuxgeekmama@reddit
I’m on the autism spectrum. I tried to fit in, but I couldn’t. I think I missed some subtle thing about how everyone else was acting, so my attempts to fit in turned out not quite right. When I was maybe 14, I said fuck it, this isn’t working, and just did what I wanted to do.
gatadeplaya@reddit
I think this is probably more common. Were the 80s awesome in a lot of ways? Yes. Were they incredibly materialistic? Oh yeah.
Exciting-Half3577@reddit
I did think I was different for the same reasons you suggest. But it was just self-absorption and trying to feel less shitty and more special. But really there were plenty of kids like me and then once I hit college, a massive amount of kids like me. I did think I was really something unique and unusual but I wasn't. It's ok that I felt that way because it helped me get through but that feeling did tend to manifest itself in obnoxious ways at times.
The REAL weirdos, in my opinion, were those kids who went on liking Led Zep and Rush far beyond the sell-by dates of those bands. Kids in mullets and concert t-shirts their first years of university or into the grunge years.
Strong-Map-8339@reddit
Undaignosed ADHD, flunked 2 grades, bad at sports except tennis, which was considered a gay sport, so I never pursued it.
Most of the schools I attended were straight out of a John Hughes movie, except I was without a clique. I sat alone at lunch.
I discovered the alt music scene, books, and writing like OP, and that's been my vibe ever since.
I once crashed a popular kids' keg party and learned those people were vapid and uninteresting. Why did everyone, including school staff, think this was 'fitting in?' It cured me of wanting to be like them.
allminorchords@reddit
Grew up poor in BFE & did not care about sports. Also pot makes me physically ill. It was rough to find my people but did…mostly thru music & The Rocky Horror Picture Show every weekend.
Superb-Damage8042@reddit
Yes. I was one of those angry goth kids, then after high school I felt this overwhelming need to conform so I could find a succeed career, so I did that until years later when I started falling apart. I’m now trying to balance the career against my need to find my authentic self, and somehow that’s happening in a very real way. I’m much happier these days. It’s the right balance in the sense that I’m not rebelling against the world, but the. I’m also not adhering to standards that appear to exist only in my own head. I still love old punk, metal, and alt rock, I’m just not nearly as angry and I dare say I’m comfortable in my own skin.
dangelo7654398@reddit
I'm weird, but not weird enough to turn pro.
AllConqueringSun888@reddit
Give it time, Gonzo.
Historical-View4058@reddit
I really despised things that were overtly popular. For example, when kids my age were listening to repetitive mindless pop rock like Kiss and Nugent (if we only knew then), I was listening to college radio and album oriented rock. Wasn’t just to be different and rebel. It was because it was interesting, stimulating, and most of all non-commercial… like the time you heard Laurie Anderson’s O Superman for the first time. The more avant garde the better.
Any_Pudding_1812@reddit
aussie here. from a country town. everyone ( not just peers adults too) assumed my only friend and i were gay because he was into punk and i was into reggae so got beaten and spat on etc etc. wouldn’t change a thing.
Eat_Your_Paisley@reddit
The op is r/notlikeothergirls