ULPT: Got invited to an interview at a known mlm company
Posted by UnusualBody604@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 54 comments
Some way i can be really annoying to them, or really waste their time?
IndividualistAW@reddit
Pitch your timeshare to them at the interview
benisbroker@reddit
Act like you are actually interested and waste their time
jnthnmdr@reddit
When they ask if you know anyone who might be interested, give them the phone number of the person that invited you.
AdAdvanced8019@reddit
Give them the Hall & Oates Hotline number.
1-719-266-2837 (1-719-26-OATES)
UnusualBody604@reddit (OP)
I think theyll see through that, its not in the US :/ (czech republic)
LOUDPACK_MASTERCHEF@reddit
if you're in europe, can't you just report them to a regulatory authority? I hear they have those over there
SugarInvestigator@reddit
Give a scientology number
JimmerAteMyPasta@reddit
And then you prank them by accepting the job. You rise to the top of the ladder, as a joke. The head honcho is a beautiful 43 year old powerhouse of a woman, god she's attractive. You have a secret love affair with her. Get her pregnant. She gets a divorce and moves in with you. You raise your child together with love. You're both about to retire, someone needs to take over the company. Your son is the obvious choice. He takes over, everything is going just as planned.
Little do they know that over the past 30 years, you've been secretly accumulating piss disks in an off site storage freezer. You convince your wife to go on vacation. You still have keys to the building. You hire some help and work fast.Every square inch of the office building is covered in piss disks, as well as your old house. You empty the bank, you're on a trip to the Cayman Islands to make a new life.
Slight-Ad-1038@reddit
This is the way
Single_Asparagus4793@reddit
They get really upset when you use the term “pyramid scheme”, so make sure to bring that up a few times during the interview.
Same_Ad494@reddit
Actually, it's more of a trapazoid...
nevergirls@reddit
A parallelogram, as it were
martyboulders@reddit
A parallelogram is a type of trapezoid!
nevergirls@reddit
Oh shit
Driesens@reddit
It's an inverted funnel system!
InevitableCraftsLab@reddit
nah dont use pyramid scheme but use the word pyramid. like "ok so then i am so to say at the top of a smaller pyramid and my friends and family are the fundament, right?"
Single_Asparagus4793@reddit
Touché! Well played lol!
tilldeathdoiparty@reddit
‘It’s multi level success!!’
kauaiman-looking@reddit
A 3 sided rectangle.
Progresschmogress@reddit
The conjoined triangles of success!
SludgegunkGelatin@reddit
Now that’s strategic, entrepreneurial, and robust thinking. You are now the regional vice assistant principal manager.
Progresschmogress@reddit
Action Me strikes again. BooYa!
Smash_Shop@reddit
If you've really got time to kill, go ahead and get hired, just be an astoundingly shitty employee. It'll take them ages to go though all the paperwork of hiring and firing you.
SneezyAtheist@reddit
Don't they charge you to join. That's the whole grift.
Smash_Shop@reddit
Great point. I have no idea.
Piddy3825@reddit
lol, every time one of them tells you how much money they make doing their scheme, ask to see their last two years tax returns.
VStarlingBooks@reddit
Sell them Cutco Knives.
SneeKeeFahk@reddit
Quickly join another MLM and turn your interview into a pitch meeting.
yowtf420x@reddit
Genius
The402Jrod@reddit
And “people who join MLM’s” is your target market for MLM’s!
yowtf420x@reddit
This should be a Seinfeld episode
Actual_Doughnut9248@reddit
Jerry: “so, you’re pitching a pyramid scheme… to pyramid schemers?”
Kramer: “No no no, see, you’ve got it all wrong. It’s not a pyramid scheme, it’s a… reverse triangle of opportunity!”
Liberate_Za_Warudo@reddit
lmao, this is perfect for Seinfeld.
kauaiman-looking@reddit
I've been calling pyramid schemes 3 sided rectangles for a while now.
ckellingc@reddit
I had that happen to me once. Actually showed up for the "interview" with like 8 other people there. He started the presentation, and I went "ooh this is one of those, hell no" and walked out
Key-Hyena5292@reddit
Eat as much as bread you can have soda and Then just Fart as much as possible
UGIN_IS_RACIST@reddit
I was once approached by someone in the aisle of a grocery store around 3 hours away from home and was offered a “business opportunity” alongside this guy and his colleagues. Stunk of MLM immediately. Who offers business deals in the soda aisle?
Anyway, I want no part of it, so I told him I was from several hours away. Doesn’t phase him. He asks where I’m from, I tell him, and he says “I went to college there! Why don’t my wife and I come down in a couple weeks and we’ll have a meeting and I can tell you more. For now, let me give you this book to look over.” It’s Rich Dad, Poor Dad 😂 I decide that if he’s going to make an effort to scam me into a MLM, I’ll scam him out of a free coffee and 6-7 hours of his time in travel and meeting, so I gave him my “spam” email address and we set a date.
He comes to a coffee shop in my town and I listen to his whole “you could earn income independently and live more freely” dog and pony show for about 15 minutes, and once my free coffee’s gone I tell him I’m not at all interested. He left and sent me an email later requesting his copy of the book back, which I have since kept as a trophy 😂😂😂
cbelt3@reddit
Is it over lunch ? Are they paying ? Expensive lunch !
I once had an engineering interview with a company for an “alternative energy project “ in Colorado. It sounded cool, they bought a flight, rented me a car, I drove to the site. Um…. With heavily armed Marines and APC’s.. um…. Turned out to be making nuclear weapons.
At the hotel that night I ordered the most expensive meal they had. Went hiking in the mountains. Had a nice day.
climaxingwalrus@reddit
Assuming group interview convince everyone not to join. But not in an obvious way.
UnusualBody604@reddit (OP)
Op here, im thinking i could leave some meme like "mfw im in a pyramid scheme" in their bathroom or something. Idk what kind tho
Joyage2021@reddit
Name names OP which one and what environment? Are they flying you to Utah?
UnusualBody604@reddit (OP)
ProfiFP, "finance consultancy", Czech republic
InevitableCraftsLab@reddit
i would just play along for half an hour and then be like : hmm but i dont know .. let them convince you again, play along as a naive idiot and do the same thing again.
over and over again 😂
Optimal_Shirt6637@reddit
But why male models?
InevitableCraftsLab@reddit
Because the fenale models seem to be at p diddy parties
FreeShat@reddit
For a paid job if you need it go.. otherwise don't waste time
metalflygon08@reddit
If they offer a free lunch of any kind really load up on it.
AlShapone@reddit
Ask them if you could do the washing up without any washing up liquid, or scrubbers.
ResponsibleAd6382@reddit
Had to share it.
https://youtu.be/lC5lsemxaJo?si=WtIBnihVeDU5EiNJ
ChocIceAndChip@reddit
Have you ever done the washing up without any washing up liquid?
Key-Control7348@reddit
At the end of the interview, become an absolute zealot for the product. "Guys I'm excited! I'm out for blood. They buy...or they die amiright?!"
_Volly@reddit
Wear a t-shirt that says "pyramid scheme" is LARGE letters. Just keep pointing at the words when they talk. Don't say anything, just keep pointing.
crystalline_jelly@reddit
If you're good at feigning outrage, I would suggest you go there and passionately defend the company to the point of absurdity, resorting to personal insults directed at all the morons who don't know the difference between an MLM and a "pyramid scheme", then describe an MLM as being more like a triangle, and insist that you are the perfect person to spread the message to the unwashed masses, but ask if they are hiring "further up the triangle." For added effect, show off some wild karate kicks and say you're ready to sell. Also, always say the company name wrong by mixing up the words.
Fitz911@reddit
Just turn everything around.
So I can make money from people below me? Does that mean you make money from my work? And the one above you? How can I trust you when you earn more money the more I believe you?
Ask them about the percentage of people that really make money with their products. These numbers are known.