ULPT: Where can u go and eat endless salami for a low cost?
Posted by TheAnalyst03@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 169 comments
Hi I love salami but it’s 9-15 dollars for one pre packaged link. I love it but I’m a broke college kid! Whenever I’m at an event I will eat like half of the available salami as most people don’t touch it or only take one.
Where can I go and spend a relative low amount 10-50 and get endless salami
GarageIndependent114@reddit
Weddings
gmoney_downtown@reddit
Some of those Brazilian steakhouses usually have a salad bar only option, almost always have salami and other cured meats. It'd be cheapest during lunch. It probably won't be that cheap, but you could definitely slam as much salami as your body will allow.
gutscheinmensch@reddit
I can think of so many places around the world where it’s way easier to find random salami and then a specifically Brazilian steakhouse
fruderduck@reddit
Watched a dude at Souper Salad eat nothing but taco meat. Got refilled repeatedly until the kitchen actually ran out.
AreYouAllFrogs@reddit
Maybe sneak some into a bag when no one’s looking.
SLUGyy@reddit
Came here to say this.
faidleyj1@reddit
Exactly my thoughts. Lunch priced salad bar at a churrascaria.
o6ijuan@reddit
I just got a 12 oz pack for $2 at grocery outlet. Also try WinCo and look for the end cuts. They don't look as pretty and they're half the price usually.
winniesmom97@reddit
There’s an app called toogoodtogo that restaurants and food places use to get rid of food for cheap that they don’t sell so maybe they have salami?
Odd_Rope2705@reddit
Your local glory hole
IWantALargeFarva@reddit
The oooold glory hole!
lookslikeyoureSOL@reddit
I got some "endless salami" for you OP, and you can have as much as you want for free.
r0ck_ravanello@reddit
Glory hole. You might even get paid for that.
motherfuckingdamnit@reddit
As the old saying goes: "A salami in the pants is worth two at the check stand."
scritchesfordoges@reddit
Not free, but Costco has massive packs of sliced salami. When they went on sale for $2.50/lb, I bought a ton for the freezer to placate the voracious salami eater in my household.
Alternately, crash Xmas Eve feasts in an Italian neighborhood. Grow out your eyebrows and wear a festive sweater and Acqua di Gio cologne.
ultrahateful@reddit
Armani + Salami = “When you’re here, you’re family.”
No-Pudding-7433@reddit
As an IAnerican of Italian descent, this made me laugh so hard.
scritchesfordoges@reddit
Everyone’s gonna have their eye on the seafood. OP Salami Pockets will get away Scott free!
HalfaYooper@reddit
Is that a salami in your pocket or are you happy to see me?
No-Pudding-7433@reddit
Where is his cousin black olive fingers? 🤔
GakkoAtarashii@reddit
This guys freezer!!
Jealous_Tutor_5135@reddit
You are a gabaghoul
lummoxmind@reddit
If you are gonna go that far, get some gabagool as well.
temp_nomad@reddit
Gabagool? Ova heeerrreeee.
catman_in_the_pnw@reddit
costco
Jack_Spatchcock_MLKS@reddit
Costco samples.
JoseThePlumber69@reddit
How do you expect an unethical tip on getting more salami. Do you know how silly that sounds
Snoo_85901@reddit
What exactly is salami
davesknothereman@reddit
Cheapest possible is Gordon Food Service or someplace like that for around $4 per pound. But it ain't the good stuff.
No-Community-585@reddit
Sometimes the meat ends are separately packaged at the grocery store and you can get a ton of meat for dirt cheap. I lived for it in my early 20s.
irenelee772@reddit
Hey man, Jon’s or any ethnic supermarket that has Salami at the deli will sell it on the low! I get a pound for like $4
panomania@reddit
In Los Angeles there's a place called Vaseline Alley. West Hollywood if you want to be technical about it. You can go there and eat salami 24/7, for free, any day of the year. It's a regular soup kitchen.
I'll just show myself out, thanks.
cyrusthemarginal@reddit
Get a job selling pepperige farms at the holidays, cut up and eat lots of the summer sausage.
Slobberknockersammy@reddit
Nobody asked about summer sausage my guy
ZanzaBarBQ@reddit
Become a hunter, have your deer processor make you some Venison Salomi. Get some jerky made while you're at it.
Oops, this is ULPT.
Poach several deer. Have your processor make venison salami and jerky. Kite them a check and leave town.
bmanley620@reddit
He should also leave a frozen piss disk for good measure
f1ve-Star@reddit
For the deer or the processor? Instructions unclear.
bmanley620@reddit
We’re being unethical here so I’ll go with both
continuetolove@reddit
Did a cat post this?
7222_salty@reddit
“I’m not a cat”
Ralph_Baconader@reddit
It’s a cylinder.
puppuphooray@reddit
Sounds like something a cat would say
204gaz00@reddit
Many many years ago I sat my son down and in all seriousness asked him if he was a dolphin. He laughed and said no and I said to him that's exactly what a dolphin would say. Oh man the laughs I got. Thank you for reminding me.
kiwidude4@reddit
Your honor
TheDoctor1601@reddit
Salami is actually not good for cats
polymorphic_hippo@reddit
Cats can have a little salami...as a treat.
Rhesonance@reddit
I mean, it's probably not great for humans either.
4friedchickens8888@reddit
I haven't laughed this hard at Reddit in a long time
freedinthe90s@reddit
Same ☠️
Artistic_Stand_4312@reddit
Rest areas after dark.
bridge2danger@reddit
Ashamed that I get this reference
Artistic_Stand_4312@reddit
🤣. "There's Something About Mary"
MassCasualty@reddit
I'm just here to pee...
Anhyzer31290@reddit
I heard Captain Ron hides his. Look around and you may find some.
Awkward-Zucchini1495@reddit
Fogo de Chao
p1xode@reddit
You're welcome over to my place. Anytime.
bridge2danger@reddit
This might be a trap. Or it might be fun. I say take a chance…
mj_syn@reddit
He might become the salami
bretthiker@reddit
I mean… the potential salami payoff makes it worth the risk
cryingatdragracelive@reddit
I think they mean salami the food, not your dong.
I could be wrong, tho. feel free to correct me, OP 😂
Cynical_Doggie@reddit
Probably a cheap breakfast buffet. Could probably just walk into an expensive one after saying your room number.
lilredcorsette@reddit
Asking the fucking real questions here, fellow salami lover.
lewtus72@reddit
Costco business center
GakkoAtarashii@reddit
Start crashing Xmas parties.
thatfakename1@reddit
If you live near a college/university wander around and crash events with a backpack liked with a grocery sack. Fill your plate with salami. Head off to a quiet corner and dump it in your backpack. Rinse and repeat until you have all the meat you need to eat.
grimalkin27@reddit
At the Y M C A
Cardchucker@reddit
Head to Costco when they're handing out samples. Bring a few costumes and keep getting in line.
orangutanDOTorg@reddit
The rainbow logo grocery outlet used to have sacks of salami ends super cheap. I haven’t looked for them in a while so idk if the still do
notthattmack@reddit
Hotel breakfasts sometimes have deli meats, and are all you can eat.
amanuensisninja@reddit
Part-time job at a deli or grocery store, steal a couple of pounds every shift.
dirtymoney@reddit
Find something you can get for free, sell it, buy salami.
I recommend hard salami.
Level_Economy_4162@reddit
Next post: where can I go to get a triple bypass for cheap
crayton-story@reddit
Turkey
Anagoth9@reddit
Get a job at a grocery store.
Become friends with the deli lead.
3.???
Specialist-Towel-554@reddit
Careful OP, I ate a 4 or 5 lb salami log in one sitting a long time ago. Big mistake, brutal diarrhea!
dieselonmyturkey@reddit
My man, join up with your local Zeppelin Salami Raiders, you sound like a good fit
ban_Anna_split@reddit
This is very specific and out there but there's an all you can eat Brazilian barbecue place in Las Vegas, and for $60 not only do you get endless really good meat and grilled pineapple, but they have a huge salad bar and charcuterie buffet that you can just get up and take whatever you want from. They had huge slices of salami there at the counter. Just in case you wanted to splurge an extra $10
ismokefakenews@reddit
What's it called?
ban_Anna_split@reddit
Galpão Gaucho
mr_muffinhead@reddit
If you're a boy, join the army. Someone will send you a salami.
ismokefakenews@reddit
Sometimes I'll see big bags of sliced salami in the frozen section of grocery store for like $5-6
Practical_Rabbit_390@reddit
Whole foods maybe? Stack a bunch of salami under something cheap like mashed potatoes.
not_aurelius@reddit
Huh? Food bar is charged by the pound…
Practical_Rabbit_390@reddit
Hot bar with individual items like soup
not_aurelius@reddit
Sam’s has 2lbs for $14. Whole Foods hot bar is like $10-12/lbs, haven’t checked recently. Better to buy in bulk, hot bar isn’t value priced it’s convenience
Practical_Rabbit_390@reddit
Right, again it's not by the pound. Soup is by the cup. Other items are too. Perhaps they changed this recently, but I knew hippies who lived by this method.
Practical_Rabbit_390@reddit
https://www.reddit.com/r/wholefoods/s/aI1piF1zCu
Let me google that for you^
ChanclasConHuevos@reddit
Better yet, get a part-time job at a pizza place. I used to crush salami and Parmesan in the walk-in during my shifts.
RootsRockRebel66@reddit
Hard or Genoa? This is important.
TheAnalyst03@reddit (OP)
Hard
RootsRockRebel66@reddit
Do you like gladiator movies?
Significant-Win-4405@reddit
Hmmm some sort of sandwich buffet, try the funeral home on a busy night
koolkidsAc@reddit
Endless Salami…. Sounds like a gay porn
jankyj@reddit
Don’t threaten me with a good time
Significant-Win-4405@reddit
Luigi Mangione has salami and meatballs
evildonald@reddit
Name of their sex tape!
bmanley620@reddit
Starring Salami Sam
Significant-Win-4405@reddit
Try Luigi Mangione
Significant-Win-4405@reddit
He's def got the meatballs
louisville13@reddit
Idk what you consider to be "endless" but you can get a 3lb salami for like $20 online here. So for you $50 you could get like 7lbs of salami
Podtastix@reddit
Delta Sky Club
Kithlak@reddit
I had an old roommate that ate so much salami that he started to smell like it. We called him The Salami Tsunami. Solid dude, RIP buddy.
TrevCat666@reddit
A Jewish New Yorkers house will have an endless supply of deli meats.
charliedog1965@reddit
Get a job at a meat processing plant and wear loose fitting pants.
NotDukeOfDorchester@reddit
One piece at a time 🎶🎵
prombloodd@reddit
What an odd post
codenameZora@reddit
This is why I come to Reddit.
weaseltorpedo@reddit
I mean yeah I love salami too, but God damn does a lot of salami make you take a big greasy pungent dump.
btfoom15@reddit
In your own mind.
What a stupid post.
featherybreeze@reddit
Love this post. I, too, am a salami fiend.
yomammaaaaa@reddit
Crash parties, weddings, anything. Dress as generic catering waitstaff, snag a tray, eat and keep what you want, rinse, and repeat.
dkrainman@reddit
"Weddings, parties, anything. And bongo jams a speciality (speciality, ality, ality)"
ChickenBeans@reddit
Work your way into master taste tester at the local salami factory.. fresh meat forever!
Bright_Ambassador_60@reddit
Jason’s Deli?
TheAnalyst03@reddit (OP)
What’s this ?
Bright_Ambassador_60@reddit
It’s a restaurant that typically has a salad bar in it that is all you can eat. Normally $12ish depending where you are.
TheAnalyst03@reddit (OP)
I legit was going to go right now unfortunately I guess they don’t allow the salad bar to be all you can eat now. There’s one an hour away and I would of drove straight there
mood-park@reddit
Noooo :(
bmanley620@reddit
Lol you really do love salami
Yesitshismom@reddit
I think we all need to know of this deli
humanityrus@reddit
When I was a poor college student, I had a friend who would get the list of receptions at city hall for anything and everything. He’d analyze the list for potential food possibility, show up and Graze the food trays, shake some hands, then load up the sandwich baggies in his pockets with leftovers at the end of the reception.
jacktucky@reddit
Go on Facebook and say bring your favorite salami meet up at the underpass on I-80. Make sure you spell salami right. Maybe add no homo and post some pics of your favorite salami. Agin be careful with that. Arrive and say you forgot your salami but you’re willing to try as much salami as you can fit in your mouth.
bird_teeth@reddit
Ethical tip: my local asian store sells frozen sushi grade salmon and tuna. You could check yours.
Unethical tip: just buy a slab of raw salmon and eat it.
TryingToFindAFlight@reddit
Get a costco membership, buy some salami, eat most of it, return the rest for a refund. Rinse and repeat. You will have to switch Costco stores at some point, but that should keep you going for a while.
trustme1maDR@reddit
I wonder if this would work at Target too. They do returns on almost anything.
Gogglesed@reddit
Order the "Putin's Mandate" at Mar-a-Lago.
Icmedia@reddit
Get a part time job at a deli and eat as much salami as you can until they fire you
realdappermuis@reddit
Think you should ask over at r/kitchenconfidential
I see almost daily salami there on charcoochieboards
hbgbees@reddit
Work for Swiss Colony or Hickory Farms pop up before Christmas. Or buy them at waaay reduced prices after.
CumAndMoreCumPartTwo@reddit
Get a job at a deli
CurlSagan@reddit
Do you have an Oberto factory outlet store anywhere near you? Or another similar company?
If so, check the dumpster for free meats.
cryingatdragracelive@reddit
mmmm dumpster meats
ScottieSpliffin@reddit
Discount grocery stores. The grocery outlet near me routinely sells these packs of end pieces that are off shaped, for pretty cheap
dizkopat@reddit
Un ethical tip find a good breakfast buffet at a fancy hotel try to look like a hotel guest, wet hair and slides and start eating free salami
dizkopat@reddit
Learn to make it. Bam unlimited salami. If you get good you can sell it. I bet there's a bunch of YouTube content, probably way better for you than store bought salami
FocusedPower28@reddit
Which orifice do you insert the endless salami into?
Commercial-Jury4605@reddit
Try Applebee's or a similar restaurant, they usually have salami in the salad bar and you can refill.
kcjnz@reddit
Fogo De Chao Salad Bar Only option.
SunnyAlwaysDaze@reddit
genius
soopirV@reddit
Learn to make your own
BOYZORZ@reddit
Any nonnos place
MrBeausephus@reddit
Finally, someone is asking the important questions!
hailthenecrowizard@reddit
Aldi is the way.
Forward_Door5052@reddit
Is wanting to pound a ridiculous amount of salami considered unethical these days?
cmh_ender@reddit
get a job at a pizza place. eat it while making pizza... profit.
ILoveLipGloss@reddit
if your town has a fogo de chao, their lunchtime special which allows you unlimited access to the buffet is your best option, because they have charcuterie (cured meats, cheeses, lox) & i load up on that, along w/ all the veg/salad stuff. there's also soup & you get the cheese bread & fried yucca. in los angeles, the lunch special before tax/tip is 20$, from what i recall, and is a great deal.
yzerman88@reddit
Glory hole
Johngo26k@reddit
Get a job catering and sneak snacks. Sometimes, they have deli trays with Salami. Additionally, you can buy more salami for your off hours with the money you make from catering.
FlailingBall@reddit
Some hotels do not check during their free breakfasts
SoftwarePractical620@reddit
I have never seen salami at a hotel breakfast
Snoron@reddit
I've seen it 2 or 3 times in the UK, at least.
bretthiker@reddit
Next to some beans and tomatoes I assume? (No wonder the Brits lost the Revolutionary War…)
Snoron@reddit
No, it tends to be part of a "continental" breakfast option, with the croissants and such!
apocketfullofpocket@reddit
I'm sorry you had to be there
FlailingBall@reddit
Okay
OkRegister1567@reddit
Come over to my house and I’ll give you endless salami
bretthiker@reddit
Steal a bunch of linked salamis from a cartoon butcher by biting into one, then take off running
sweetb00bs@reddit
Theyres a restaurant supply store near me that sells 5 lb bags of pizza topping. You can look into that
CoachDeee@reddit
Fogo de Chao market table ayce $18 for lunch only iirc
bmanley620@reddit
Break into a bank and hold people hostage. When the negotiator asks for your demands tell him you want all the salami
emgeehammer@reddit
Any airport lounge in Europe, during breakfast hours. I recognize this may not help OP, but it’s 100% true.
chris14020@reddit
Wear a big coat and then Wal Mart.
ironicmirror@reddit
Get a job as a waiter with a catering company. Make sure you get the job of cleaning up the charcuterie board.
TinyHandsBigNuts@reddit
Ok i gotchu, this works best at fancy grocery stores like Whole Foods. But it works for me when the salami cravings get too strong.
carlosdangertaint@reddit
Where would you like to hide the salami?
Odd_Rope2705@reddit
Fogo de Chao Brazilian steakhouse. All you can eat meat, and they have a lunch special.
garaks_tailor@reddit
Not terribly cheap but fogo de chao usually has lunch meats on their buffet. It will be 40-60€ but it's all you can eat and they won't throw you out if you stay literally all day.
magseven@reddit
Check out if grocery stores in your town have a salad bar. I think they usually have salami as a topping. Not the good stuff though. Wild question though. "Endless salami"
kiwidude4@reddit
Crash Christmas parties maybe?