Nah u got it right and wrong. Women want a man capable of violence and measure that by confidence. However if you have any violence displayed they dont even have to measure it anymore. From then on its based on a risk assessment on if the woman wants to take the risk of a violence capable looking man who has been violent in the past vs capable looking man who has restraint. Its basically choosing between getting a dog from the pound to both be a companion and make you feel safe. If the dog looks intimidating and you want one to make you feel safe. Do you a) choose one which seems very capable but is nice staying unsure if it is able to protect? b) choose one that is a except has the history of having bit people. c) get b but its trained to attacks only on command and never its owner? Most people would choose c or a if they wanna play it safe. Stupid people risk it and go for b thinking they have what it takes to tame b or even see it as a challenge or ego thing. They think if theyre good/pretty/smart enough they can pull it off. (This is the "i can change him" crowd). maybe they just dont know any better because of their past experiences with others. Sometimes theyre not socially adjusted enough to recognize that they chose b instead of c. sometimes they think maybe here and there it works out. But we often see they get bitten and are shocked but have already bonded with the dog too much until it gets way too far out of hand. And sometimes the b dog is smart and pretends to be c or a but as soon as hes adopted and in a stable home he reveals his b side. This is the reality of abusive relationships. Men can experience the same except is usually more a case of "Ill get what i can get." The ones who still want a thrill or short fling but dont want to risk anything go for c or in some cases a. The ones who just wanna settle down quietly or already feel safe and are well adjusted go for option D) sweet and cuddly nanny dogs with a heart of gold not even capable of anything bad. These are useful for times when safety is already present or when These dogs are looked for when it's time to find an absolute safe choice if you already feel safe or need one to help around with basic stuff. Most people would LOVE nothing more than a combination of d and c. However thats rare. Whats more possible is d and a (loveable bear who doesnt hurt a fly). If the partner is only d women will crave any of the other types for a fun time. Men would love to just collect as many as possible.