[-]

_Internet_Hugs_@reddit

Definitely D.A.R.E.. I was a Dare Role Model in high school, one of the big kids who would go to the elementary schools and tell younger kids how much fun we had without drugs and alcohol.

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Flux_My_Capacitor@reddit

Well when we were in school, DARE stood for Drug Abuse Resistance Education.

Now it’s TRDAV?! 😂

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SurpriseVast8338@reddit

Thank you for leaving the motto, because I was initially misremembering Woodsy as the Tootsie Pop owl and was like "that mf's not a role model…He just lived in the woods and stole kids candy!"

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colostitute@reddit

I can hear this picture. Of all the pictures, this one?!

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problyurdad_@reddit

Is he more of a 70’s thing? I’m an elder millennial and I feel like he was before my time? I very much remember everyone in the photo above but I don’t remember Woodsy?

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SurpriseVast8338@reddit

Thank you for leaving the motto, because I was initially misremembering Woodsy as the Tootsie Pop owl and was like "that mf's not a role model…He just lived in the woods and stole kids candy!"

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Wasting-tim3@reddit

I’m not sure if I disappointed them the most. They ARE the ones who taught me how to do drugs.

Also, no stranger has ever given me free drugs.

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OtherlandGirl@reddit

Exactly! They promised us it would happen! (I wasn’t actually given free drugs until YEARS later when my dad got medical marijuana) 😁

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Antnee83@reddit

DARE was hilariously counterproductive to the point where I wanna don a tinfoil hat and say it was on purpose.

I remember very clearly the officer showed up, had a literal suitcase full of (I assume) fake drugs and paraphernalia.. and the effect was a bunch of kids wide eyed and curious as hell.

"Looks like mad scientist gear!"

Every book about drugs was checked the fuck out of the library for weeks after that. It did nothing to deter us, we were enthralled.

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I just remember when the officer was talking about street names for various drugs, and us white suburban Catholic school kids going "HAAA HE CALLED THE WEED 'ACAPULCO GOLD' " and then doodling guns and joints on all the characters in the workbook.

Yeah we turned out great, lol.

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wokittalkit@reddit

Did anyone get that book they passed out that had a description of all the drugs, their effects, how long they lasted etc…? I did and that book made me want to try LSD, Mushrooms and Mescaline. 12 year old me thought damn how cool does that sound? Visuals and patterns and colors and synesthesia oh my!!! I had never tried any drugs at all at that point haha

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briktop420@reddit

My DARE experience was the Chapelle show skit almost verbatim. Police officer showed up with the suitcase full of drugs the first week and then the next week (because we didn't seem scared enough) full on crackhead. Which went well.

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VotingRightsLawyer@reddit

Honestly, it's just an impossible task to keep kids off drugs. The access to them is too easy and the allure too deep. I just wish they would do an actual education drug program to teach kids about the actual dangers of drugs without all the fearmongering and hyperbole.

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Antnee83@reddit

My highschool Health teacher unironically did that. I can hear it in my head two whole ass decades later:

"You guys are gonna do what you're gonna do. Always drink lots of water and if you feel sick, stop."

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cookiemonster8u69@reddit

I used to wear a DARE shirt when I'd go to the dispensary.

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cookiemonster8u69@reddit

The bud tenders used to think it was hilarious. Got several freebies because of it, so, win win. Take that, DARE!

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OtherlandGirl@reddit

New life goal for me

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Nearly_Lost_In_Space@reddit

Our dare officer got arrested for cocaine possession, I don't think they cared.

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walruspawls@reddit

Became friends with my DARE officers son, and actually smoked weed with his dad after he retired.

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XPN1971@reddit

The local leader of M.A.D.D. got caught in a DUI checkpoint with a open bottle and a drunk 18yr old boy she was screwing

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OtherlandGirl@reddit

Bwahahaha!!!!😂

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SexyFroot@reddit

I did drugs with a DARE shirt on……..

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Working_Physics8761@reddit

Same

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Rise-O-Matic@reddit

Best way, honestly.

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Oubastet@reddit

Our DARE officer killed a middle schooler crossing the street in his patrol car while driving home. After his shift and off duty. While speeding. In a school zone.

He "voluntarily" retired with full pension and then left the state. This was over 30 years ago. Nothing changes.

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-Invalid_Selection-@reddit

Most dare officers were the biggest drug dealers at school

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lookieherehere@reddit

Not even close honestly

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alberthere@reddit

I didn’t even think they had a mascot.

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vincicon@reddit

McGruff is in prison, so his opinion is moot.

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Strytan@reddit

That was a crazy rabbit hole to go down. A grenade launcher!?

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/mcgruff-the-crime-dog-actor-gets-16-years-in-prison/

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RedJohn04@reddit

You (two) just did such good reddit. 1) rando fact, that IS entirely related to the OP… , followed by… 2) the link to answer the question I was formulating in my head. And now I’ve read a story about 1000 plants and a grenade launcher. I feel like we all win here.

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DisabledMuse@reddit

Plus a thousand marijuana plants and a small army's worth of weapons?!

He took a bite out of crime and got a taste for it.

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JimJordansJacket@reddit

Crime tastes GOOD!

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Financial-Bid2739@reddit

Based

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vincicon@reddit

Right?!

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tillyspeed81@reddit

Man Mcgruff taking a bite outta crime literally! Letting down the lion, possibly Smokey and sparky with that grenade launcher…

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eatyourface8335@reddit

It’s moo…like a cow’s point. It doesn’t matter.

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Limerance@reddit

I will upvote this quote every time.

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Treadingresin@reddit

I don't even know who Sparky is, but I've never set anything on fire I didn't plan to inhale. So the lion and Mcgruff.

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LABignerd33@reddit

Agree, who is Sparky?

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monster_bunny@reddit

Goddamnit this is brilliant

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DEATHbyBOOGABOOGA@reddit

What the fuck is Sparky?

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GrunchWeefer@reddit

Clearly some sort of dalmatian. Beyond that, though, I have no clue either.

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problyurdad_@reddit

Smackey the Frog, of course

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JuliusSeizuresalad@reddit

Oh I know who

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MarkWestin@reddit

Smokey. I burn stuff.

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GoodeyGoodz@reddit

The DARE lion told me people would offer me free drugs, and that fucker lied to me. I shoulda know he was lion.

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Interesting_Bet2828@reddit

Mostly the right column

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miseeker@reddit

I’m fucked..at 10 the neighbor kid and I set the woods on fire. I’ve dissapointed them all.

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DrewZouk@reddit

This isn't a tough contest.

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droford@reddit

Not pictured..Smackey the Frog

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umbrawolfx@reddit

Daren, no question. 😂

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Intelligent_Pass2540@reddit

WHERE IS LOUIE THE LIGHTENING BUG??? BECAUSE UM WELL....

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NuovaFromNowhere@reddit

The DARE lion since I’m a medical pothead. No violence, though. No forest fires or other crimes either.

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RickiSpanish5@reddit

I've only disappointed DARE lol, and just weed.

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noonesaidityet@reddit

Never Smokey.

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Zopheus_@reddit

Hopefully no one disappointed Louie the Lightning Bug.

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nochickflickmoments@reddit

gif

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Horror_Purple1867@reddit

I always thought he was funny, most of these PSA’s were funny. The funniest was still the Owl. Don’t pollute.

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cbih@reddit

D.A.R.E. didn't have a mascot when I had it. That program did teach me a very important lesson though, never trust the police.

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wBeeze@reddit

And they told us all the drugs were bad, but when I tried weed and found it to be pretty enjoyable and not life ruining, it made me wonder what other drugs they were lying about.

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cbih@reddit

That's kinda how opiates get you though. Taking an oxy on the weekend can snowball real quick.

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wBeeze@reddit

But that's why lying about weed is dangerous. Tell the truth and don't make em think meth, opiates and other hard drugs are similar to the ganja.

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Steely-Dave@reddit

You couldn’t be more right. You are never anonymous when it comes to cops, they will always share information where it benefits them and they will always, always use it against you.

And there was most certainly a mascot for DARE when we were in it. It was Officer Smith, the lazy easily corruptible patrolman. There was a related reddit post some time back and it seemed every bodies DARE officer had a skeleton or two in the closet. Mine was busted for providing rides back and forth to the airport (2 hours away) for influential locals while on duty.

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wBeeze@reddit

Dare! To keep kids off drugs.

Dare! To keep kids off dope.

Dare! To give kids some help.

Dare! To give kids some hope.

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waywardviking208@reddit (OP)

Dare I say it’s time to smoke

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wBeeze@reddit

I gave that up a long time ago, brethren. Have one for me.

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waywardviking208@reddit (OP)

Weed not tobacco

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wBeeze@reddit

That's what I figured

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SarahBear81@reddit

Oh definitely the lion. If drugs were Pokémon, I've caught them all!

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Only1Skrybe@reddit

Probably Scruff McGruff, because fuck the police.

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couchcreeper23@reddit

Anyone except Smokey is acceptable.

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_Batteries_@reddit

Smokey can suck it

Apparently he is the reason forest fires have been so bad lately.

Forests are supposed to burn occasionally. Brush fires really, not gigantic one.

But Smokey made everyone super paranoid about putting out fires. Which meant the underbrush just kept building up, and building up, and building up. For decades. Half a century even. Then that goes up and you get the massive firestorms we see today.

So yeah, best of intentions and all that, but still, Smokey the bear can get bent

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cllittlewood@reddit

McGruff is my neighbor nickname so all but him!

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TheLoneliestGhost@reddit

DARE. I have no clue who Sparky is, tho.

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CRX1701@reddit

Scruff McGruff Chicago, Illinois. 60652.

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Distinct-Reference-3@reddit

DARE😞

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5pens@reddit

None of them!

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tweakin_casually@reddit

Fucking DARE lion is staring into my soul rn. He knows man, I swear he KNOWS

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JGrabs@reddit

Captain Planet. Definitely Captain Planet.

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kinopiokun@reddit

The war on drugs was a joke, and weed specifically was about racism so I don’t feel bad at all lol

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Steely-Dave@reddit

It took us so many years to finally ask What the fuck is the end-game for programs like this anyway. The Army has a “zero-tolerance” program for many things including suicide. And it seems a little silly trying to exert total control over the uncontrollable. But then you recognize it’s as much about unit readiness as it is caring about Soldiers. So at least there’s an honest end game. If we all stopped smoking weed, then what?

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drawredraw@reddit

It’s the lion. Stupid fucking tool, fuck him. Who the fuck is sparky?

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jachildress25@reddit

They’d all be proud of me.

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ArachnidMother7211@reddit

That dare lion is fucked

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blownout2657@reddit

The dare lion is in therapy form my crew alone.

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Steely-Dave@reddit

DARE stopped caring a long time ago. Right around the time they started using the program to turn kids into informants.

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ryhoyarbie@reddit

None. Never caused any fires, did any drugs, or caused any crimes or stole anything.

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Autumn_Forest_Mist@reddit

I was a boring kid so I obeyed all of them.

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mallarme1@reddit

All of them. Probably Smokey the least, but he’s got something on me for sure.

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JimJordansJacket@reddit

I went to jail for having drugs. 😂

I would definitely never disappoint Smokey Bear.

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qtjedigrl@reddit

Wow, none of these. I guess I'm not one of the cool kids

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Uller85@reddit

Smokey the bear campaign did a lot of damage to prescribed burns that actually help prevent forest fires. But I guess it's the thought that counts or something.

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NICD4DDY@reddit

The Lion, for sure..

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rooks1999@reddit

Oh man, this just hit me harder than I expected! I honestly can't decide.

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in_Need_of_peace@reddit

The entire right column

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Slugwheat@reddit

All those plus my parents

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East-Caterpillar-895@reddit

I never let Smokey down, I smokey every day. The D.A.R.E. lion doesn't like me for sure

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ethan__l2@reddit

Smoky disappointed us. Decades of forest mismanagement have taken their toll.

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bridge1999@reddit

He is just one Bear and do you know how much of Alaska is woods. Poor guy can never keep up. It’s hard for him to hire crews with no budget

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Sht_n_giglz@reddit

Hes just a public servant. His budget was cut.

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ChickinInaBizkit42@reddit

DARE. Only for the green stuff though.

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Remote_Independent50@reddit

The Dare program cost over $500 million!! Every year!!! That is very disappointing to the American people

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Orvan-Rabbit@reddit

None of the above.

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headsbig@reddit

The DARE Lion would just throw his hands up at me.

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sporkwitt@reddit

What was Scruff MacGruff's deal?
Don't talk to strangers and i am definitely watching you masturbate from the closet? Probably just the first one, but I def got that latter vibe off of him.

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Drslappybags@reddit

I'm only familiar with two of those characters.

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DarthSangwich@reddit

Why? How many forest fires have you started? 😳

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silasmarnerismysage@reddit

I once soaked a basketball in gasoline, lit it on fire, and kicked it around my yard with my friend. Unbeknownst to me, our next door neighbor was the fire martial and he was not amused.

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allysung83@reddit

Only one 😅 My cousin and I, when we were dumbass 8-year-olds, built a fire in my parents woods... and apparently didn't properly extinguish it. Sometime later that day, our neighbors called the fire department when they saw smoke billowing from our woods.

Oops.

Thankfully, no damage was done. Lesson learned. Sorry Smokey.

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actionerror@reddit

Just one gender reveal party

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Nearly_Lost_In_Space@reddit

Wait, you haven't?

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Sal_Paradise81@reddit

Definitely the D.A.R.E. Lion.

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Sal_Paradise81@reddit

Definitely the D.A.R.E. Lion.

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This-Essay4507@reddit

Ohnoes, Mr. DARE lion better not come and arrest me uwu (jk, ...but that lion boy can get it)

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MothyBelmont@reddit

Well I don’t see a picture of my parents here so….

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hemlock337@reddit

Mr. Yuck.

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shawnofnc@reddit

Clean run across the board. Can't leave one of my homies feeling left out.

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SplakyD@reddit

I can't bear to look the DARE drug lion in the eyes.

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TheBugSmith@reddit

I'd say DARE but that way to keep KIDS off drugs not adults

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Le_Sadie@reddit

Been setting a lot of fires there, friend?

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drainbamage1011@reddit

OP disappointed everyone except Smokey. So, not setting fires.

...at least not in a forest.

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nochickflickmoments@reddit

gif

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Toblogan@reddit

Me and the D. A. R. E. lion just put a joint out... 🤨

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GelflingMama@reddit

Same. 😂 Everyone but smoky and the crying “Native” dude (aka the Italian actor who pretended to be native his whole life. 😂)

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Lanky_Republic_2102@reddit

I can’t even say Smokey, not with all the playing with fire back in the day.

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MyNameCannotBeSpoken@reddit

How many fires are you starting? 🔥

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waywardviking208@reddit (OP)

gif

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EricRShelton@reddit

I don't know what the statute of limitations is; I'm not saying a damn thing!

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elkniodaphs@reddit

I was going to say, "nobody..." but then I remembered my Everdrives. Sorry, McGruff.

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Rishtu@reddit

My parents.

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PsionicKitten@reddit

My initial reaction too.

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Kooky_Donkey_166@reddit

This guy

gif

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waywardviking208@reddit (OP)

Don’t drink formula 409 or windex would of been better than putting a cool green sticker on stuff to avoid

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harlembornnbred@reddit

Idk who sparky is but I know smokey is for sure the only one I didn't disappoint

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Coyote_Roadrunna@reddit

The lion guy ever since my state became a legal cannabis state.

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fiercetywysoges@reddit

Funny story. When he was a teenager my brother was a huge druggie. He was also naturally very tall and skinny. Our dad was LE and they had the McGruff suit they would use for various events. Guess who got recruited to wear the odd fitting costume? He was 100% high as a kite during most of those events and we laugh about it to this day.

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trickman01@reddit

Probably Smokey. He entrusted you. He told you that you were the only person capable of preventing forest fires, yet they still burn rampant.

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djayed@reddit

I want to say D.A.R.E, but probably Smokey the most. I won't go into details.....

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AtlasXan@reddit

I be burning tree every day. Sorry not sorry Smokey.

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Transplanted_Cactus@reddit

None, I guess? I've never set anything on fire that shouldn't have been and I've never used any drugs.

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Garpocalypse@reddit

There's no question that DARE didn't do a damn thing.

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nofateeric@reddit

As a completely sober, environmentalist, but former criminal... It's Scruff McGruff

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_its_a_SWEATER_@reddit

Smokey side eyeing California.

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Royal-Possibility219@reddit

DARE is the whole reason I started using drugs.

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chueysworld@reddit

Who the fuck is sparky?

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instant-ramen-n00dle@reddit

At the moment, D.A.R.E. is failing me. I could not resist the drugs.

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AnimatronicCouch@reddit

I don't remember a DARE mascot. And when we had it, the slogan was still "DARE to keep kids off drugs."

I don't think I disappointed any though. I'm a boring goody two shoes. lol

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wheres_the_revolt@reddit

Definitely DARE for me, McGruff next cause fuck tha police. I’m great with fire safety though!

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semigator@reddit

Whichever one is your father

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hbi2k@reddit

McGruff and the D.A.R.E. lion disappointed me. Lying bastards.

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Best-Vegetable3550@reddit

I’m pretty sure a guy, who looked just like that lion, sold me some drugs out of this cool compartmentalized suitcase. He had all his stuff separated by drug type. Made it easy to step up to the harder stuff.

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Shaolinchipmonk@reddit

Smokey is the only one that would be proud of me, and honestly that's all that matters.

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Kobalt6x10@reddit

My parents

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TheThrivingest@reddit

Lmao well I haven’t started any fires, but I have done a lot of drugs 🤣

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WaxWorkKnight@reddit

McGruff got caught with 1000 pounds of weed, 9000 rounds of ammo, and 27 firearms as well as a grenade launcher

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Otono_82@reddit

McGruff with his trench coat.

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ToWitToWow@reddit

My dude. I’m walking around wearing that DARE Lion’s head like I’m Hercules

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Terrible_Shake_4948@reddit

No Snitching

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tearlock@reddit

Did you forget Woodsy Owl?

gif

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snoopy-person@reddit

That DARE lion for sure.

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TheGreatNickalo@reddit

all of the above are equally disappointed in me

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ElectricSnowBunny@reddit

Daren the Lion probably has me on a special list since I used to sell too

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Kizenny@reddit

lol DARE for sure. I never did find those dealers giving out drugs for free and my brain on drugs looked delicious for breakfast.

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braywarshawsky@reddit

I'd wear my DARE shirt while smoking pot way back in the day...

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DandyAndy008@reddit

Whatever they combine to form.

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Reasonable-Wave8093@reddit

I only rolled w Smokey & McGruff

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KitchenBomber@reddit

Same. Maybe the lion came after my Dare stint. Maybe he was an optional thing that my Dare program just didn't do. The dalmatian I can only assume is the "we've got smokey bear at home" of fire prevention.

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Reasonable-Wave8093@reddit

Smokey and McGruff shouldve done kickass short movies together!

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kid_sleepy@reddit

I played both McGruff and the DARE Lion when I was in high school over two decades ago.

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Everynevers@reddit

I think DARE let me down.

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cmack@reddit

Smokey is the only important one. Others are trash.

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sdujour77@reddit

Myself.

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eatyourface8335@reddit

I used to get high and light gasoline puddles in my parents’ driveway. I know it disappointed our neighbor.

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suitedmoniker@reddit

If smokey or sparky are in the running for most disappointed at this point in your life, cut that shit out!

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captain_trainwreck@reddit

I didn't know DARE had a lion, but it's definitely him

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MelodicLavishness335@reddit

Easily That D.A.R.E Lion. I just had more in common with Tony The Tiger.

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frenchfret@reddit

Who DIDNT I disappoint is more like it…

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New-Anacansintta@reddit

I don’t know Sparky or the Dare lion. I think I was too old for DARE. Smoky scared me, though.

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jessek@reddit

I’d never disappoint Smoky or Sparky.

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Ok_Visit_898@reddit

I'm on drugs right now

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Critical_Liz@reddit

Definitely DARE.

Which reminds me of a gaming story from a friend of mine, who was playing in a Vampire game. Her group were escaping prison and made it to the police garage and decided to steal the DARE car.

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cointerm@reddit

I've done my share of drugs, but no more than your average, curious college kid.

I did almost burn the fucking house down when I threw a cig I thought was out into a trash bag full of paper. Went to take a shower - when I got out, I smelled fire. Very lucky there was a fire extinguisher nearby, and very lucky my roommate kept cool and said, "Uh....you gotta pull the pin." I got evicted, sued, but it turned out ok. But yeah, Smokey would've shit bricks.