ULPT:Need Help Crafting a Reason for Unavailability During Morning Hours
Posted by DifferentElk4940@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 25 comments
I have a manager+ meeting scheduled in my office for two hours that I've dedicated ample time to prepare for. However, during that same time, I also have a court hearing for a traffic ticket. I'm unable to reschedule either the meeting or the hearing as it would inconvenience my boss. Can you offer any suggestions for a reason why I won't be available for two hours in the morning and will need to come into the office after lunch? I'd prefer not to use a sick call excuse. If you have any other creative ideas, I'd love to hear them!
HoxhasDeadbeatDad@reddit
Spray liquid ass in your office for a full 30 minutes the day before on your way out and close the door. Text your boss that you left a couple of minutes early because you were feeling sick. In the morning text him that you will be there a little late because you've been puking all night / might have food poisoning, but the door should be unlocked for them to use. Once they go in there, they will smell the ass and want to change venues for the meeting. No one will question why you came in two hours late.
Lucky-Technology-174@reddit
IBS
Skyblacker@reddit
Catch the meeting remotely. Just turn off your camera and mic in court.
taffibunni@reddit
Depends on the court. Some courtooms will kick you out for even taking your phone out of your pocket/bag. Not to mention that anyone who has ever tried to do a meeting while attending to some other important business will tell you that your attention to both will suffer.
mimi-blah@reddit
Say you broke a tooth or a crown fell off & you have an emergency dentist appt.
But have you tried to reschedule the hearing? It’s usually pretty easy to do so. You can also see about going in to court before the hearing date.
ChefArtorias@reddit
Parental doctor's visit. Something they can't drive home from.
GardenerInAWar@reddit
Eat the ticket and go to work.
SupermarketSpiritual@reddit
"I'm not available for reasons" block the calendar.
Juanita_Yo@reddit
Picking up a relative from the airport or taking relative to dr.'s appt.
Recent_Obligation276@reddit
Old person to the doctor. Makes you look like a model family man, and there are no alternatives from having someone of a more sound mind attending an appointment with you. If you use airport they can say “just call them a cab I need you here”
Warm-Iron-1222@reddit
Just say you have an appointment you can't schedule for any other time. Then give no additional information. Easy. Use your sick hours or PTO. They don't need to know your life story. If you have the time, take the time when you need it. That's how it works.
jankyj@reddit
I have received a notice to appear in court.
xikbdexhi6@reddit
Yes. Exactly. Why even lie?
Temporary-Ear-7798@reddit
This. Skip the cognitive load of lying and just keep it vague. Summons to appear is perfect.
jankyj@reddit
“I am being asked to appear because I am apparently a witness to an alleged crime. I’d rather not talk about it for the integrity of the legal process.”
Still very truthful.
WatchingTellyNow@reddit
The danger of fibbing is the manager might expect you to join the call, even if just on the phone, which you can't really do if you're in court. So if you're going to fib, it's got to be something where you wouldn't be able to be on the phone.
Key-Organization-159@reddit
You got a jury summons. Close enough.
claygriffith01@reddit
Dude what better excuse than court? Just tell the truth.
sydouglas@reddit
If you have kids in grade school you can always say there is a school function , works great this time of year
gurmerino@reddit
explosive diarrhea
Actual_Doughnut9248@reddit
Too much detail is bad. Just saying a personal family issue came up that requires immediate attention is enough
Prize_Assumption4624@reddit
Send them step by step instructions on creating piss discs and say I won’t be available as I’m busy making these, then proceed to leave them around the office
Embarrassed_Flan_869@reddit
Depends on how you want to play it and how trustworthy of an employee you are.
Flat tire on the way to work is always a good excuse on the day of. No one is going to check for a plug in the tire.
Before that, the landlord needs you home for X. Maintenance or repair etc. Or gas/electric company needs you there.
Drive an elderly relative to the doctors. No one else is around. Make it something serious that can't be rescheduled.
You need to tend to your piss disk/liquid ass production.
virtualchoirboy@reddit
Get an air pump you can run off the power port / 12V connection. Deflate both passenger side tires. Take a picture, send it to boss, say "Waiting on a tow to tire shop. Will be in when fixed". Get out pump, pump up tires, go to court, go to work.
Since getting towed and getting tires fixed is dependent on others, you're at their mercy for timing so boss should give you some leeway. And you deflate two tires because you only have one spare.
Just-Brilliant-7815@reddit
Accompanying a sick parent to the doctor? Taking them for a procedure - colonoscopy is a good one.