ULPT Request: how to fuck with a neighbor who plays music too loud.
Posted by tropicaldutch@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 108 comments
Yes I’ve asked them to turn it down. No I don’t want to go to the landlord. There’s a recent post on here explaining why Bluetooth can’t and shouldn’t be jammed. I was wondering if I can amplify the Bluetooth and just connect to their speaker and shut it off. Open to creative solutions, but they need to be ones I can do anonymously and without any destruction of property (except maybe the speaker, if I could get away with it)
therealdildoexpert@reddit
I've got one better for you. This worked for me. There is a YouTube video you'll want to put on the highest volume possible. Leave the house for a few hours. This video will randomly, play really loud noises in very short bursts so it's not like they can call the cops.
Ivabighairy1@reddit
Link?
LexB777@reddit
This video will randomly, play really loud noises in very short bursts so it's not like they can call the cops.
ohhim@reddit
Record it and replay it back amplified on a 1 second delay. It'll drive them crazy.
ClimateBasics@reddit
Depending upon the distance, you may not even need a delay in your circuitry... the speed of sound may introduce sufficient delay.
If they're close by (say, in a coterminous apartment), build a cone with your mic at the focal point, and attach cone to wall. Put your speaker butted tight up against the wall adjoining the offending apartment.
Build yourself an audio echo circuit, but shift the octave up a bit as well, so the echo they hear will be higher... the ear picks that up more easily than just an echo.
What's really cool about this is that they'll hear this frequency-shifted, time-shifted music, wonder what's going on with their stereo, turn off the music to investigate, and your feedback noise stops.
Leave it on all the time, and the circuitry might even catch them shouting, whereupon it'll shout back... with a time delay and at a higher pitch. Depending upon how firmly grounded your neighbors are in reality, they may believe they've got a poltergeist. LOL
sir_psycho_sexy96@reddit
You got any tips on how to do this?
One of the best tips I've ever seen here.
Trigger1221@reddit
Laptop with a microphone that has audio coming from speakers. All you'd need to do is select 'listen to this device" in the mic settings and it'll play back anything it hears with a small delay, then just crank the speakers.
LSDummy@reddit
When I try this is just starts to echo
Trigger1221@reddit
A directional mic pointed towards the music would be ideal for this, otherwise yes you're going to get a echo. Separating their music track from your played recording in real-time isn't very doable, so you'd need a mic that can fit the job.
Or, you just Google what song they're playing and play it slightly behind so you don't have to deal with mics.
mostundudelike@reddit
The Shazam app will identify it and link to play from Spotify and other music apps, with pretty quick turnaround.
cplatt831@reddit
How hard would it be to write something that could listen with Shazam, play that song (now slightly delayed), and then listen for the next song?
sir_psycho_sexy96@reddit
Fuck yeah. Thank you kind redditor.
I don't need this tip right now, but you never know when you'll get a new neighbor when you're in am apartment complex.
solidsnake0580@reddit
Do it at 1AM in the morning
2taintsmcgee@reddit
I agree. Beca1 AM in the afternoon would be ridiculous
solidsnake0580@reddit
Well if anyone ask just say “its 1PM somewhere”
tropicaldutch@reddit (OP)
I like this. A lot.
Slapmeislapyou@reddit
Lock the post. The answer is right here.
l00ky_here@reddit
I had this problem living in a multi unit building sharing walls. My next-door South American neighbors would start off playing loud Ranchero music on the weekends during the day. That was fine. Then they started playing it at night, but on the weekend, fine. Then they started playing it starting in the afternoon on Fridays and all through the weekend. Still, I was ok. When they started with the weekdays at that same rate, I was over it.
I had a surround sound system at the time, so one night I put some Metallica on, turned it up, and left to get some ice-cream. I left the door open and my security door locked. Their front door was so close to mine that when they opened theirs it would hit mine if they didn't catch it.
Came home and resumed normal music. They never said anything but I never had another problem about it.
forewer21@reddit
I did something similar, but with a subwoofer for an upstairs neighbor. I stacked a bunch of stuff on top of a table so a subwoofer faced the ceiling and turned it all the way up. Left for a few hours and voila, no more loud neighbors
l00ky_here@reddit
What did you play?
l00ky_here@reddit
I'm lucky because I am a nextdoor neighbor and wince inside everytime I trip, drop something or walk heavy at night. I'm on a "Hey Neighbor!" Basis with the ppl below, but I worry.
possiblysaid@reddit
I did something similar but I vote for playing cannibal corpse or something super heavy
mostundudelike@reddit
I’m convinced bad neighbors is why they sell as many copies of “Trout Mask Replica” as they do.
l00ky_here@reddit
I didn't want to truly piss off the rest of the building. My downstairs neighbor is a 90's kid and she's always playing the shit I listened to in high-school. Guy on the other side of loud neighbors is a former guitar player and front man who listens to Jimi Hendrix and Greatful Dead. They didn't mind the Metallica.
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
Frankly, this is what's wrong with our country. Communicate with your neighbor. If that doesn't work (seems it hasn't), you can either go to your landlord or call the police. They are violating the law, even after you asked them to respect your right to quiet enjoyment of your apartment. Call the police. They will come out and tell the neighbor to shut up.
As far as self-help (shutting down their music yourself), that is a bad idea. It's illegal. And it is the most likely thing to lead to violence. Be an adult and call the police.
undeniabledwyane@reddit
Wrong sub for that advice, bud
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
I'm an eternal optimist.
undeniabledwyane@reddit
I respect that
Flux_My_Capacitor@reddit
You’ve lived a privileged life.
Care to lecture us some more???
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
I haven't lived a privileged life. No money from parents. Made my own way. Have worked hard since I was out of high school. Don't assume.
slipstream0@reddit
Problem with calling the police is there has to be a law they are breaking. My town for example doesn’t have any noise ordinance laws, so when I called to complain about fireworks at 3am (nowhere near any holiday) we were told there’s nothing they could do.
My_Clandestine_Grave@reddit
Hell, even if there are laws or ordinances in place most of the time they'll still tell you there is nothing they can do or they just plain won't show up.
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
Not true. Every time I've called the cops they (eventually) show up. May take an hour, but I had a neighbor recovering from heart surgery. I called not knowing this, but he thanked me profusely. His wife wanted him to call the police, but he was scared. He said I saved his life. (Exaggeration, but maybe not.)
My_Clandestine_Grave@reddit
It's great that you've had good experiences with cops showing up but that has not been the experience for a lot of other people.
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
Yes, I understand. I'm not minimizing that reality. But if possible, it is better to call the police.
My_Clandestine_Grave@reddit
Oh, I misunderstood. My apologies. You are right that it is better to at least try to call. Although frustrating, at worst nothing happens. At best, calling them can at least establish a pattern of disturbances.
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
I mean, I live in a city where the police told me not to report a theft from my car because there was no way to retrieve it. And another friend had a nice car stolen, called the police, told them he had a tracked through his app and knew the exact location, and the police told him it's their policy not to arrest car thieves because they don't want to endanger the officers. Yet, for sound disturbances, each of the few times I've called police over the past 15 years, they have showed up and put an end to the noise.
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
Are you sure? DM me your town and I'll look it up. A lot of the time, the police don't actually know the law.
amy000206@reddit
If this was the only thing wrong with my country it would be a blessing.
Due-League932@reddit
There is a tutorial somewhere online for building a device that will silence all audio devices within a certain radius. Someone got in a lot of trouble for making one with a massive radius and interfering with important equipment.
MrSommer69@reddit
Play Scotland the brave louder.
cffndrggr@reddit
Fart spray in their dryer vent and then a leaf blower to push it through. They won’t hear it but the dryer will smell like turds. 🤙
TSB_1@reddit
liquid ass is SUPREME!!! freeze it in the shape of a disc and slip it under their front door.
NickCudawn@reddit
Liquid ass piss disc? 🤯
TSB_1@reddit
It's the next logical evolution for this sub
ParkKing3D@reddit
Really? Nobody?
Sigh...
Pissdisk.
Sweaty-Feedback-1482@reddit
Psssht… pissdisk is for amateurs. Fecal frisbee is pro-level
Mike-the-gay@reddit
You’re gonna need a press and a mold to do it properly.
Sweaty-Feedback-1482@reddit
Are you assuming I’m above that?!?
Mike-the-gay@reddit
No, just offering tips for efficiency.
CLONE-11011100@reddit
Add some liquid ass for potency.
Ivabighairy1@reddit
We were waiting for you. What took you so long?
ParkKing3D@reddit
Took a while to clean the carpet, didn't even hear the neighbour knocking because I was playing loud music
travishummel@reddit
Is this your first time? What if the neighbor grabs it? Op should cover the pissdisk with a sock so that way if the neighbor grabs it they will only get sock
Duh!
amackul8@reddit
And fuck their dad
monicasoup@reddit
I'm sure if it is after a certain hours, you can just call the police.
DAZdaHOFF@reddit
Counts as ULPT because chance of shooting.
NickCudawn@reddit
Only in the US
DAZdaHOFF@reddit
Of course, in Europe neighbor would've never gotten his loud music permit or Bluetooth license in the first place.
kickintheshit@reddit
💀
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
Most states you can call the police at any hour.
memememe81@reddit
Sure, but if you have a year-round tan, the last thing you want to call is the police
NickCudawn@reddit
Love year-round tan
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
Fair enough. I don't have a year-round tan. But that's really a shame. You have the same right to not be subjected to this nuisance.
Mediocre-Metal-1796@reddit
Bluetooth is a point-point connection, and needs pairing (with direct access to the speakers). It’s not like an FM radio you where you can “override” the signal with a stronger transmitter.
NickCudawn@reddit
I'm sure there's things you can do to an established Bluetooth connection but that would probably peer into illegal life pro tips. Another option to just annoy them would be to get many cheap Bluetooth receivers and name them the same as their speaker so when they search it, 20 identical looking devices pop up. Ofc from there you could do more malicious stuff but again, probably illegal
Admirable_Tear_1438@reddit
Opera, full blast.
Geod-ude@reddit
JG Wentworth 10hour
Stainless_Heart@reddit
1-877-KARS-4-KIDS
smokingmerlin@reddit
Klingon Opera
strangelove4564@reddit
Vogon poetry.
Comfortable_Guide622@reddit
This is the way
Admirable_Tear_1438@reddit
This guy gets it.
horsetooth_mcgee@reddit
Why won't you just talk to the landlord? Also, during what hours is the music too loud? I'm sure you'll just say that it's after 10:00 p.m. or something in order to make your point, but I'm betting it's just that their playing loud music at any point during the day or evening that pisses you off.
tropicaldutch@reddit (OP)
Long and complicated reason why I don’t want to go to the landlord. It’s mainly that I’ve asked them to turn it down several times, they always turn it down and then 20 minutes later turn it up again, and I work from home and it’s a distraction
reddittuser1969@reddit
Noise cancelling headphones would be a good temporary fix on your end until you decide what to do
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
Just go to the police.
slipstream0@reddit
Doubt they have a noise ordinance law for during the day
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
I wouldn't be so sure. Where I live, you can't make unreasonable noise ever. So, gardeners are ok. Super loud music is not.
slipstream0@reddit
I called for fireworks at 3am (not around a holiday) and was told my town has no noise ordinances so they weren’t coming out. YMMV
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
The police also may not know the law. Believe it or not, that happens. Actually, lawyers sometimes don't know the law. I just had a lawyer tell me something, looked up the statute and realized the lawyer was wrong. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS!
Ok_Resolution7047@reddit
Do you share a wall? Turn THEIR wall into YOUR speaker. Here's a 300w speaker exciter:
https://www.amazon.com/p/B0C86M68WR
Flux_My_Capacitor@reddit
Link already dead?
Due-Challenge-6368@reddit
Don’t. And move on with your life. Mature. Grown.
Flux_My_Capacitor@reddit
Oh do fuck off with this nonsense. Loud music is enough to make people crazy.
Lopsided-Nebula7384@reddit
You can't move on with your life if loud music doesn't allow you think.
TheSpaceman1975@reddit
Wrong sub. The door for mature, ethical suggestions is right over there.
Danny_G_93@reddit
Paper bag, some shit, a lighter.
Able_Vegetable_4362@reddit
Get a really strong signal jammer
Frosty-Diver441@reddit
Leave your radio on, on a really annoying station. Then go on vacation.
diamante_manos@reddit
Get a louder stereo and blast classical music
doowahditty13@reddit
Fart spray. Water gun.
microbe1956@reddit
I had a christian rock "artist" neighbor who withstood a constant barrage of Yoko Oni's greatest hits and continued with his shit at full volume
hohoduck@reddit
Knock on the door and tell them your auditioning for the circus then grab your ankles and suck your own cock in front of them.
No-Advantage845@reddit
Holy shit
Famous-Example-8332@reddit
You could fight sound with sound; whenever he plays music, blast a 15k hertz tone. It’ll cut right through his music without being as loud, and if it is as loud, it’ll be just about unbearable. I guess you could protect yourself with active noise cancelling headphones.
Necessary-Science-47@reddit
Are their breakers easily accessible on the outside of the house?
My goto for my ild noisy neighbors was just turning off their electricity
amy000206@reddit
Obligatory piss discs and liquid ass
attackbat33@reddit
Play it back just a little bit delayed. It will ruin the experience
amy000206@reddit
Clever!
amy000206@reddit
Wait til they're asleep and play Opera
elputas69@reddit
Post an ad for free valuable stuff like lumber or flagstone. Say “first come first serve. Stuff is in the back, please ring doorbell, but not before 5 am” use their address for the free stuff ad. Do that for collectibles, free tv, dvds, etc.
AngelOrChad@reddit
Why don't you want to go to the landlord?
kooshans@reddit
You mean like intercourse?
chrissie_watkins@reddit
Stick a transducer on their window where they won't see it, turning the glass into a speaker. Play annoying high pitched sounds, low sounds, or static whenever they play music. Or use a mic to replay the sound back at a slight delay. They'll look but never find the source, or that's how I imagine it anyway.
solidsnake0580@reddit
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=csgrXFCtPqI&pp=ygUYSGFjayB3aWZpIG5vaXN5IG5laWdoYm9y
utter_Kib0sh@reddit
play thick of it by ksi max volume 24/7
Fit-Dark-4062@reddit
Is the coax their internet comes in on accessible from outside?
A pin shoved through the coax that touches both inner and outer conductors should take care of the problem for a while