How are interracial couples viewed in the UK?
Posted by Federal-Breakfast762@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 1560 comments
Just curious. I'm an American and I've visited and stayed in the UK for a while, as well as countries within the EU, and I've noticed how more common it was to see interracial couples than over here in the States (Loved it, btw!)
Now I could just be seeing things from my little window of a small town where most people in my area are white (I don't really go to the big cities much). But even in the small areas of England where I'd stayed, I saw a lot more diversity when it came to couples.
Over here, for the most part, people like to couple up with those like them. Which I can understand. But they tend to judge you or question you (a bit too much, in my experience) if you're interested in someone outside of your culture or race ( I remember telling a past coworker (we're both black) that I thought a white coworker of ours was cute and she was genuinely puzzled and asked "You like white boys?" I just replied with "Nah, I like attractive guys." In the past, people would always ask me "Are you gonna marry a (insert literally any other ethnicity here except Gambian because I was into things outside of my culture
-_-) guy?" As a joke. But looking back, it was kind of annoying.
I have relatives in England and France, and I'm pretty sure a good chunk of them are married to people outside of their race, compared to my relatives here in the States, where all of them, as far as I know, are married to people of the same exact backgrounds.
I hope this isn't an ignorant or dumb question. I was just curious. I could be overestimating the diversity tolerance in the UK and underestimating it here in the States.
Thank you
Any_Crew_5478@reddit
It’s so normal that most British people would think you’re weird to even ask
divine_pearl@reddit
This. No one even gives second look.
pineappleshampoo@reddit
Depends where you are. In some areas people absolutely do give a second look, or worse. There are a lot of backwards places in the UK. My Asian in laws say there are no go zones in the country they try avoid if possible. Seaside towns being one.
Even in busy cities, as an interracial white/Indian couple we do get strange looks from Asians. Very rarely from whites. But people from my spouse’s community/background have a lot of opinions and judgment about him marrying a white girl, and when we are out in areas with a significant Asian population we get so many stares.
GoGoRoloPolo@reddit
My sister's husband is North African and she's white and grew up in the UK. A guy working in the Turkish restaurant we went to in London was totally staring at them. White people never care but brown men can get a bit funny about it sometimes in their experience.
MrAnderson69uk@reddit
Was the Turkish guy just gorping, was your sister pretty? Some people have a tendency to just stare and watch others, my friends 12 year old, with suspected ADHD, tends to watch what other people are doing, and I guess from the watchees point of view, they may get uncomfortable.
whatsup680@reddit
Gawping 😊
Zorgoroff@reddit
I think they were just providing one example of it happening but that there are more. It’s not you’re going to go back to ask someone if they’re ADHD if you’ve been made uncomfortable.
sporkofsage@reddit
My husband is mixed race but has a mostly South Asian name. We never really think about it because it's such a non-issue, but the only time I'm reminded of it is when delivery men (predominantly brown men) absolutely do not want to give me, a white woman, my husband's packages. I think they think I'm a scammer who's cloned his card or something and I'm ripping him off.
PsychologicalAd4430@reddit
If my sister or any woman in my family ever strayed I sure as hell would put a big fat full stop to it. I can tell you that for free.
Dutch_Slim@reddit
Are you their boss then?
callisstaa@reddit
Avoiding seaside town is good advice in general tbh. There are a few decent ones but most of them are shitholes
Infinite_Sparkle@reddit
I had an Indian colleague whose parents (I think his father was a doctor and well-off) cut all contact with him because he married an European girl he met here at Uni. Her parents were quite welcoming.
Erratic_Goldfish@reddit
My ex was Bangladeshi. When we were out and about it never attracted much comment but she was always worried about British-Bangladeshi people being weird about it.
scrappy_bong@reddit
Yeah so not uk then is it. It's there religious beliefs that and not uk religion. We are not in the slightest bit bothered us brits. If ur happy we happy. Hahaha
churrascothighs1@reddit
I’m guessing you think that non-white people can’t be British?
Chance-Criticism5844@reddit
The poster mentioned areas in the uk and seaside towns so I’m guessing they’re in the uk, so it is us Brits.
pineappleshampoo@reddit
Yes I’m talking about Britain. Thanks :)
Enxpya@reddit
I’m British of Asian Descent (mix Korean/white) and grew up in England in a seaside town during the 90’s up until around 2009 and moved to America/Canada with my family. I grew in a seaside town predominantly white and yes, daily racism was a thing.
I was trying to find 1 comment relating to this and seaside towns for some reason don’t seem to attract too many non white folks back then. I went back for a vacation recently and the town I grew up in seemed to have an explosion of immigrants (which is great!), not a major increase but it seems to be 15% compared to the 2% of people I came across back then. I stood out as foreign growing up like a sore thumb.
The cities are vastly different and mixed from experiencing London and kinda wished I gave the cities a chance but opt to choose studying in Canada for the multicultural aspect where people didn’t care of your background too much.
I remember one old lady from up North approaching me as a teen at a pub when I was helper part time back in the day and told me “you would love derby, lots of lovely cultural mixes up here, I don’t know why there doesn’t seem to be any of that down here”.
makeaomelette@reddit
Ooof, I felt this in my heart, as I too grew up in predominantly white communities w/ scant Asian encounters other than the occasional adopted Asian kids like myself in Europe & America. Do you feel the acceptance level living in Canada has remained the same today given all the recent unhappiness about immigrants happening there now? This is happening in the UK, EU, and the US right now too, and I’m feeling really sad about it.
Chemical_Respond_443@reddit
It's hilarious you talk about tolerant multicultural Canada, I've only been to Alberta which I know is like the bible belt of Canada but holy damn is it a province of monochromatic racists! I think countryside Vs cities counts for a lot in terms of progressive views generally and globally.
jaisaiquai@reddit
Alberta wants to be Texas, they're not representative of the whole.
Dapper-Crew-1353@reddit
I can add to this. I am a white female, husband is black from America. He moved over and wanted to be close to my family to see how he found it. I was hesitant as I grew up by the coast in southwest England. We lasted 8 months and were so glad we left. It got to the point where I felt so uncomfortable taking my husband because the stares made us feel uncomfortable. We knew that 99% of the time he would be the only non white person at an event or pub etc. He faced so many micro aggressions in such a short space of time. I promised that I would never raise our kids there and wanted them and him to be around people who look different than white.
We’re so much happier being closer to London and are scarred for life ever living back down there again.
makeaomelette@reddit
Yeah, I agree it depends on where you’re located. My white, 🇬🇧 SO and I (🇰🇷 American) get zero notice in London, but as we head further and further north to visit his family’s village the looks & general level of noticeable discomfort can get more and more pointed.
I have noticed being American & English speaking gets me a lot more acceptance and it’s easier to overcome perceptions based on my race in the UK. Commonality of language and cultural familiarity puts most Brits at ease, and they tend to warm up quicker if you show curiosity and appreciation for their country, cultural differences, & approach it all with good humor instead of taking yourself too seriously. We Americans tend to be a very literal people, while the Brits love word play, sarcasm, and the ability to take a good ribbing. They do like our openness and optimism, so long as we remember to use our indoor voices 🤭
nickcotton1962@reddit
So are you saying Asians are the racists because you didn’t marry into your own culture. Not judging just trying to understand
princessparis5@reddit
I get this too, what they don’t know is that I’m half Indian half English. It’s so annoying, why do people care so much?! My family is very mixed so it’s the absolute norm. I’ve even had Indian guys say weird things to me because of my race, and it was their idea of making a move. Ugh!
SBS_38@reddit
I was going to agree that it depends where you live and possibly what your background is. I’m Asian and all my long term relationships have been with guys from different ethnic backgrounds. When I lived briefly in the midlands in a city with a large Asian population around 15 years ago, I felt really uncomfortable walking through the city I was living in with my mixed race boyfriend and also was questioned and felt really judged by people in shops and things about the relationship . When I moved with him to London there was no issue at all we lived in a much more diverse area. It’s one of the reasons I loved London so much. Although actually the only the other time there was a problem was with a different boyfriend (who was white) who insisted on coming with me to a part of London where there were a lot of Asian people (where I was only visiting for a very specific reason) and I did feel we got a lot of looks there and I felt very uncomfortable (he was oblivious!) Funnily enough in both these cases the people I was being judged by were from a different Asian background than me- but they just base their judgement on what you look like and assumed I was part of their culture and doing something that was considered taboo (dating outside the ethnicity/culture) . I deliberately live away from my original community for this exact reason - so it was upsetting to be judged by people I didn’t even know/wasn’t even part of their cultural background. Thankfully this was not very often at all in London (literally once in nearly 2 decades) though as long as I stayed away from certain areas which was easy to do given the sheer size and diversity. I’ve now moved away to a much less diverse area and am currently single but as it’s a mostly white area I don’t imagine I would be judged in the same way.
panspiritus@reddit
And how exactly you are interracial couple, being the same (caucasian) race?
BurnUnionJackBurn@reddit
I had the same issues going out with a Nigerian
Family and friends telling her no good would come of a mixed relationship with some even ostracizing her
SnackGrabber@reddit
I live in a seaside town, it's not a problem here, we love multiculturalism and diversity, some of the olds can a bit biggoted but aint that the way everywhere?
Demongeeks8@reddit
Brighton enters the chat.
Aaronski75@reddit
Yup don't care who you get in the sack with, as long as I don't have to hear it or see it!
Surface_Detail@reddit
Can I have his spot in the audience?
Blaggermuffin@reddit
Can I watch you watching them
Civil_opinion24@reddit
Tickets are over by the counter
CozJeez85@reddit
Popcorn. Get your popcorn!
Conscious_Tiger7398@reddit
Albatross! Get your albatross!
newforestwalker@reddit
What flavour is it?
Conscious_Tiger7398@reddit
Flavour?! What flavour is it?! It's a bleedin' albatross! Fuckin' sea bird flavour!
newforestwalker@reddit
Do you get wafers with it?
Conscious_Tiger7398@reddit
Course you don't get fuckin' wafers with it, it's a fuckin' sea bird!
Conscious_Tiger7398@reddit
Course you don't get fuckin' wafers with it, it's a fuckin' sea bird!
Surface_Detail@reddit
Butt Scratcher!
Inner-Cupcake-6809@reddit
Butt Scratcher?
Inevitable_Boss9425@reddit
BUTT SCRATCHER!
Melodic-Tutor-2172@reddit
Yeo bc way consenting adults do behind closed doors isn’t my business.
Chance-Criticism5844@reddit
Wow that’s just so anti voyeur-ist.
Electrical-Leave4787@reddit
🤣IKR. Interracial is a top-rank keyword!!
virgin_goat@reddit
Yet when i tame my fave sheep to an hotel suddenly everyone is speciest
Fine-Koala389@reddit
Why didn't you stick to a hotel in Wales ... or maybe the Lake District if feeling exotic?
Ze_Gremlin@reddit
Nah, hearing your neighbours at it is a mixture of funny/fascinating..
Like reality TV..
We had a neighbour who was a fairly frail, skinny, middle aged women. Bit of a karen by day, but by night, she must have had some moves.. there was a string of strange men paying her visits during lockdown and all we heard was the blokes moaning away..
My Mrs reckons there was candlewax involved, I'm not so sure.
cloche_du_fromage@reddit
Each to their own... 😁
No_Camp_7@reddit
Not true everywhere.
No one cares I’m mixed in London, but I had a fair bit of trouble with it in the north east recently. In the 90’s when I was a child in Surrey it was very difficult. When my parents wanted to get married they were asked “you can’t be serious?” by the vicar’s wife (white) and disowned by one of my grandparents (black). I was frequently described using words such as mulatto, half-negro, referred to as a mongrel and a mutt. School was hard every single day. Family tensions were high. There’s a mixed race sub on here if you really want to listen to our sob stories (which are a common experience, we’re also at higher risk of things like severe mental health problems and poor achievement at school because of the nature of our experiences).
However, today in most cities in the UK no one gives a damn. By the time my younger sibling was born at the end of the 90’s attitudes had changed significantly. In fact where I live now there are so many mixed kids and young people I’m genuinely taken aback by it every time I leave the house. That said, it’s 99% black men and white women; a strong indicator that racism is alive and well (on both sides).
I think the UK might be one of or the best place to be mixed. Proud of that.
Losflakesmeponenloco@reddit
I see so many in all the UK now. Go to East Ham and there are now all kinds of mixes going on.
newbris@reddit
What happened in the northeast if you don’t mind saying?
HumbleScottish@reddit
I know, who honestly gives a fuck!?
DumbIdiot2020@reddit
True for 99% of people, me and partner have had the odd comment
mikiex@reddit
I think there are plenty of racist people still in the UK that do give it a second look
barrybreslau@reddit
Unless it's a Muslim dating a Christian, because they tend not to tolerate that. They let the boys fool around a bit when they are young, but after that it's an arranged marriage with a second cousin.
Neuromancer-13@reddit
Muslim isn’t a race
barrybreslau@reddit
Ok, granted, I'm generally referring to Pakistani, Bangladeshi and other South Asians here.
obliviious@reddit
While I'm sure most don't care, there's still a lot of dumb racists here.
Theo_Cherry@reddit
Depends.
bojangles25x@reddit
I wouldn't say this is true based on my personal experience. It highly depends on the variation of IR.
bertiebasit@reddit
You’re joking right? Plenty of people have plenty to say about mine…I can’t be on my own
fleashart@reddit
Yes they do. We've been stared at a lot for having a mixed race family, not to mention the comments and harassment. People act like my partner stole our kid if I'm not with them.
Dangerous_Hot_Sauce@reddit
Depends how good looking one of them is
Alarmarama@reddit
Hmmm it can really depend though. As a white guy, if I'm walking around with an English girl, nobody bats an eye. If I'm walking around with a South Asian girl on a date, I get glared at a lot. And that's typically by South Asian men, not by anyone English.
As a whole it's normalised here, but not everyone seems happy about it in all cases.
rinkydinkmink@reddit
Ha if an Asian girl walks down the street arm in arm with a white girl they get the looks from the Asian guys too. I actually got asked to do that deliberately by a total stranger to annoy her cousins because essentially they had been bullying her severely and iirc trying to force her into a marriage. We're talking pretty extreme stuff had already gone on, it had got physical, and there were a group of them.
Anyway she asked me because of the way I was dressed (looking outrageous lol) and how much it would make them angry so we pretended to be really good friends and walked past them all chatting. They persuaded her to get into a car with them and I insisted on making sure she was consenting and gave her my address and told her where to find me if there was any trouble.
I went home and told my boyfriend and friends and they totally lost the plot and expected us to all get raided by the local asian gang (serious dudes, very dangerous) but nothing happened. I tried telling them that anybody with one braincell would just be happy that their cousin had met someone who was kind to them but they didn't believe me.
Anyway that's my random rambly memory story for you. I hope you enjoyed it. All this happened in the early 90s and everyone involved was totally off their face on drugs and/or insane at the time. I actually caught up with the girl again many years later at a Mind day centre, funnily enough!
pineappleshampoo@reddit
Same here. It’s lovely people are so hopeful and naive saying it’s not a thing, but it’s a shame they’re trying to speak as if that’s an inalienable truth. It really isn’t. As a white girl married to an Asian guy we get a LOT of stares and comments from other Asians.
auntie_eggma@reddit
I'm Italian with an Indian partner (eight years now) and we've never had the slightest issue. No weird looks, awkward questions, nothing. Not from Asians, not from anyone. It's a total non-issue, at least in my experience in London. Even in heavily Asian areas. No one bats an eye, no one looks at me like i stole their man or whatever it is people are expecting. Literally a non-issue.
But I would never (again) live outside a major city in any country, because rural folk everywhere in the world are more racist on average than city folk.
Romana_Jane@reddit
We don't even have to be together, I get comments and questions on my surname from Asian people, and so does our very white passing daughter.
Celtic_Cheetah_92@reddit
I’m the same (my partner is Indian) and we get a lot of comments from south Asians. Normally they are telling him how lucky he is, so it’s not deliberately vile exactly, but it’s definitely racialised and weird. Makes me feel like some kind of trophy rather than a complete person.
Virtual-Guitar-9814@reddit
I guess they cant get any without their dad's permission!
amran04@reddit
Yeah, a lot of South Asian guys actively want to only date within their own race, and the Asian girls don’t want them, so they get annoyed.
But also, when certain groups of people are underrepresented in media, and therefore are generally seen as less attractive, then certain groups will be disproportionately single. That’s a valid reason to be annoyed. This factor applies but is not limited to south Asian guys as well.
Miserable_History238@reddit
South Asian guys actively want to only date within their own race. Why?
the Asian girls don’t want them. Why?
amran04@reddit
some South Asian guys have very traditional expectations for women in relationships, but it’s still a dangerous stereotype as a lot of us, me included, aren’t like that.
South Asian women do date South Asian men, but just as much as they date other races, which is normal and how it should be.
Agincourt_Tui@reddit
I worked with an Asian girl and she'd go on work nights out with us but ask us not to put stuff on Facebook about the night. It could have either been the drinking side of things or the more romantic part, but it was clearly a major concern that either family, friends or just the community would find out
HawweesonFord@reddit
Don't think this is true. Can't see how everybody is saying what they're commenting tbh. People definitely think things and mention it. Maybe nit directly to you or in front of both of you but they do. All the comments seem to be like what people think it should be like. Not the reality.
Grown up in the south east and lived around and a while in London.
Been in several interracial relationships. Casually and more seriously. I have probably had hundreds of comments. Was seeing a black girl and people mentioned it. Colleagues friends family. Seeing east asjan girls people really mention it a lot. My experience the most commonly commented on ones. Seen and heard other comments made about white women dating or liking blacks. Having Muslim partners. All sorts of stuff. Some derogatory and some more matter of factual.
I've had comments from chiense waitresses when in chinese restaurants with chinese girlfriends. I've dated girls who said they only day x race.
Drunk people sober people poor people professional people. All sorts said this sorta stuff.
It's way more common than people in this thread are making out.
Who cares though? People are just ignorant and have not experienced a lot of things in this world.
NeonDave@reddit
It's so normal I actually forgot I'm in one when I was thinking about my view of them.
auntie_eggma@reddit
I forget I'm in one all the time. 😂
IcyAtmosphere582@reddit
Same here ngl, I actually forgot for a second myself lol
Mothraaaaaa@reddit
Same. I'm English and my girlfriend is from Wales. Exotic as fuck. As you can imagine, it does turn a few heads.
Zack_Knifed@reddit
Is she sheep?
APar93@reddit
Hers names Baabara
onebadmousse@reddit
Just sheepish.
Slightly_Effective@reddit
How many of her are there?
ClaryClarysage@reddit
Don't count them, you'll fall asleep!
Imperial_Squid@reddit
Brb, asking that person's gf "how many are ewe?"
Mrwebbi@reddit
I assumed three of them stacked on top of one another wearing a trench coat and a wig.
Ze_Gremlin@reddit
Wouldn't bother with the trench coat. They already come with their own fleece
MaskedBunny@reddit
I tried dating three sheep in a trench coat once, I wouldn't recommend it. It was baaaaad
nutwiss@reddit
Kinky!
Stigmata84396520@reddit
Not sure, every time they try and count they fall asleep.
Informal_Speech_4452@reddit
I tried counting but fell asleep.
Zack_Knifed@reddit
So many. All of Wales.
Grand-basis@reddit
That's racist man
PurplePlodder1945@reddit
Please tell me you’re joking
Grand-basis@reddit
I am indeed man, humour doesn't translate well on social media but it was a joke.
PurplePlodder1945@reddit
Try adding a /s. You never know with Reddit. Some people take life way too seriously. Had to ask 😂
Grand-basis@reddit
You're right man! The world of Reddit can be an obscenely bizarre & finding the truth in things said can be so fuzzy & illogical but thanks for enquiring.
ScopeColorado@reddit
Lol 😆
gandolfthagreat@reddit
Ewe!
newforestwalker@reddit
Ewe..
OminOus_PancakeS@reddit
Brilliant
seefooddiet242@reddit
As an English girl dating a Scottish man living in Scotland I'm a total sassenach
Mothraaaaaa@reddit
Is that the Gaelic word for "traitor"?
seefooddiet242@reddit
It literally translates as English person 😂😂 mostly an outlander reference
Chelsea_Ellie@reddit
How do you communicate Has she tried to learn English?
nutwiss@reddit
Yeah but It just comes out as "baaa..."
Chelsea_Ellie@reddit
It much be very difficult to deal with issues
citygent1911@reddit
What do the rest of her flock think about it?
AdmirableCost5692@reddit
but how do you understand her? did you have to learn Welsh?
Mothraaaaaa@reddit
I just talk really slow and really loud. If she doesn't understand a word I just shout it at her until she understands.
AdmirableCost5692@reddit
aaah the classic approach. amazing how effective it is.
drh4995@reddit
Deserves my upvote 😂
Capable_Command_8944@reddit
🐳
Mothraaaaaa@reddit
Her name is Shamu.
porryj@reddit
Same
DJBigNickD@reddit
Ha!
Same!
TheOneCalamity@reddit
Yeah your comment reminded me I'm in one too haha, I'd been in the thread 2 minutes
Nannyhirer@reddit
Came to say the same. Glad I wasn't the only one!
PanicIsMyName@reddit
You made me chuckle, actually out loud. I needed that, thanks.
Wylmarrin@reddit
It's normal where I live. Do you live in an alternate Britain?
FenderForever62@reddit
My friend visited from America (NYC, so a very diverse city. Friend’s parents are Chinese) and constantly pointed out every. single. interracial couple.
I said to her I wouldn’t have even noticed if she hadn’t pointed them out. She couldn’t believe how many interracial couples there were, and I was honest and said it wasn’t something I’d ever think about. It blew her mind though
Missus_Nicola@reddit
I'm more likely to notice a couple with a massive height difference than an interracial couple.
Wind-and-Waystones@reddit
I mainly notice them when it's a not often seen pairing, like Polynesian x south Asian or Scandinavian X Carribbean, but it's mainly in a "oh cool, that's a new combo" sort of way.
Actually, while thinking about it. The Venn diagram of "interracial couples I notice" and "ethnicities I rarely see" is basically a circle. Like I very rarely see a Latino/Latina in Yorkshire so I think I'm actually noticing that and not the interracial couple
Ok-Dragonfly9451@reddit
My Mexican gal pal married a Yorkshireman
guero_fandango@reddit
That’s because there are very few Latin people in the UK and it’s a very diverse set of continents. What does a Latin person look like? It’s quite a classist and colourist society the majority of Mexicans for example don’t look like Spaniards. Generally everyone is mestizo with those with stronger indigenous features being less likely to be upwardly mobile and therefore unlikely to travel to the UK due to this. Afro Meztizo making up a lot of Latina America too, it’s quite a mix and of course some people more white passing ( often those who appear on tv ) again due to systemic problems. All this to say perhaps you have and didn’t know it.
Missus_Nicola@reddit
Thinking of it now, you're right, I'm in Yorkshire, and I don't often see anyone who is latino/latina.
RimDogs@reddit
That is weird when you think back to the large influx of central and south Americans who moved to North Yorkshire and the Yorkshire Dale's over the last century.
Don't make me put an /s.
Missus_Nicola@reddit
Ah, see I'm in west yorkshire so that never affected me. (Also /s just in case you thought I was actually that dumb and missed yours)
RimDogs@reddit
Yeah, I guess you see more native Americans and Inuit in your area.
MaskedBunny@reddit
Where as in South Yorkshire you can't move for blooming Brazilians
RimDogs@reddit
Oddly enough there are a couple of Brazilians running a little cafe in North Yorkshire. Seems they moved from Rio de Janeiro to Redcar. Probably for the weather, the football and the beautiful women.
MarcelRED147@reddit
You don't need the /serious tag, we all know you're 100% legit.
ummm_bop@reddit
I know exactly 2 people who live in Yorkshire that are Mexican. My friends wife, and their baby
BoringWardrobe@reddit
Or those couples who look weirdly too much like eachother that you wonder if they are related...
Missus_Nicola@reddit
Or the age gap where you're trying to decide if they're a couple or mother and son. Like 60 and 30.
itsjustmefortoday@reddit
Yeah or wearing really bright colours. Or one being really skinny and the other very large.
PureSea1948@reddit
How interesting, you’d think NYC would be diverse.
Gruejay2@reddit
It is, but some (not all) Americans get really obsessed with race. Don't get me wrong - we shouldn't pretend race doesn't matter at all - but interracial couples are such a non-issue here, so it's weird to bring it up.
Postmodern_Rogue@reddit
This, I'm in an interracial relationship and it's not once, ever been an issue.
Douglesfield_@reddit
Aye, first thought was it was a weird thing to ask.
Bertybassett99@reddit
Race is still a thing in the US.
Douglesfield_@reddit
I mean it's still a thing over here.
mesmerizingg_lumina@reddit
Just less talked about.
MrSchpund@reddit
It had got to a point when it pretty much wasn’t, and then D&I got rammed down everyone’s throats to the point that you couldn’t not put people back into pigeon holes, as that’s exactly how it’s designed.
Douglesfield_@reddit
Is this your personal experience as a person of colour?
MrSchpund@reddit
It’s my experience as someone who raised a stepson who was born to a Polish mum and a Sri Lankan dad.
When at the workplace we would have group sessions to bond as a group, it then became popular to talk about differences, in the name of “diversity”.
We are all human, we are all different. Differing cultures can be amazing to experience, though the colour of someone’s skin does not affect how much in common you have with them - the compatibility of experiences, beliefs, morals, ethics, etc, does.
When do workshops ever focus on that? They don’t; it’s about labelling and therefore segregation of what could be like-minded folk.
MrSchpund@reddit
I thought less of someone I’d worked with 12 years ago, to then be reunited, when she stood in front of a tiny group of “us”, to then bark on about something related to race.
She’s been continually promoted.
She then failed to get her company car MOT, so I added a couple of hours to my journey to do that.
Should this nondescript story be about a colleague who wasn’t prepared, or about a person of colour who found themselves in a tricky situation because no one at the garage would help her?
MrSchpund@reddit
The thought that my stepson (I’m no longer with his mum, nor were we ever married) would ever have to identify himself as anything than the high-achieving legend that he is, and would one day feel forced to stand in front of a crowd because he’s brown, makes me feel sick.
He wanted to be a veterinarian when he was young. He played piano, then the guitar, and loved The Beatles and then Nirvana. He now plays rugby semi-professionally and has an ongoing relationship with a wonderful mixed-race girlfriend.
What part of that should be used as a tool against white people to show how brown people can do well if they’ve the right attitude?
It’s absolute lunacy.
Arch_0@reddit
True but I wonder how much of that we are importing from the US.
Firm-Resolve-2573@reddit
Where do you think the Americans got it from? The British have historically been absolutely awful to a lot of people around the globe. They took those attitudes with them when they left to go massacre the native Americans for their land. Those beliefs didn’t spontaneously appear once they got there.
Bertybassett99@reddit
Yeah, not like the states though.
matomo23@reddit
You’re right on this. But Americans will argue strongly about this.
They talk about race way more than we do.
Bertybassett99@reddit
Its a thing. It ain't in the UK for example.
I said to an American. I will have a black coffee. She was what how can you call it that?!?
Well its coffee and its black....
worstcurrywurst@reddit
What's weird is the apparently innocuous comments made about race like "Oh I'm white so the spiciest thing I can handle is mayonnaise".
My brain breaks from the inaccuracy, ignorance and flippancy of what is to them a benign comment.
Also the fuckers have never been to Glasgow and had a Vindaloo.
YourLizardOverlord@reddit
It's easy to spot people who haven't done that because they still have a working esophagus
terrorbagoly@reddit
Or met any white Eastern Europeans! I often joke that I was born with a big spicy pepper in my hand.
colei_canis@reddit
Americans are weird about race in the same way we’re weird about class is the way I’ve come to understand it.
Douglesfield_@reddit
Fairs
Jickklaus@reddit
It is, and we need to get better. But it's also not as bad as elsewhere.
Practical_Page_3790@reddit
You wouldn’t believe the stares and looks you’d get if you had mixed race kids in some Eastern European country! Same If you are dating a different race. I mean it was only 10 years ago parents would forbid their children to date someone because of the race.
Ziphoblat@reddit
Spent a fair bit of time in Poland with my mixed race kids and never had any issues.
apainintheokole@reddit
Which bit of Poland - it is a big place. You might not in the cities, but did you go outside into the rural areas and towns??
Ziphoblat@reddit
Wrocław. I'm sure the rural bits might be dicier, but that is also the case in the UK.
AvatarIII@reddit
Frankly I'd almost say that outside a few cities, non-white people are rare enough it would be difficult for them to even find a partner with the same background as them.
millyloui@reddit
You cannot be that blind
Bertybassett99@reddit
Clearly many Americans are not blind and make a thing of it.
Whoisthehypocrite@reddit
When I was in San Francisco recently, we noticed how much more diverse the bars that we went to were versus ones in London. In London, race is still absolutely a thing in terms of how and who you socialise with. Most of the pubs I go to near my office and near my home are 90%+ white. I was at a comedy show last night and was remarking that it was almost entirely white. It seems quite strange given that much of London is 50% non white.
Bertybassett99@reddit
Thats not a race thing. Thats a money thing.
forfar4@reddit
Comedy isn't the best barometer. Different cultures laugh at different things. Anyone from a minority background will have been raised with that culture's comedy as a key component of their sense of humour.
That isn't to say that a "British sense of humour" would be alien to someone from a different background, it just might not be worth their time to attend, in the same way that I wouldn't open the curtains if Michael MacIntyre was doing a tight five minutes in my back garden.
There are exceptions to every rule, but it would be interesting to see how many English-speaking French or German people would visit a British comedy show for the second time.
endoplanet@reddit
That's exactly what they're saying though. If different races have different cultures, then race is "a thing".
vj_c@reddit
I'm Indian, the problem here is you're looking at pubs as a barometer. Firstly, it's important to note that South Asians are the UKs biggest minority group & a fair chunk are Muslim, so aren't going to the pub.
The other big factor is even as a guy who's perfectly happy drinking alcohol, other South Asians tend to invite you to their homes rather than the pub. And not just other South Asians, I've got Italian friends & they have the same culture of visiting eachother's homes.
So what ends up happening is that I'll go out to the pub with my white friends, but with friends from outside Northern Europe, the whole family tends to get to know eachother, but you can't see it at the pub.
Odd-Dare-4469@reddit
Only place where race is still a thing in the UK is with the Royal family. Otherwise, UK is way ahead of the US by light years on race relations. I mean one country had race-based chattel slavery while the other didn’t.
Bertybassett99@reddit
Royal family you say. Maybe old Mountbatten did, it he's brown now.
Grand-basis@reddit
That's crazy.
Wanan1@reddit
I was uncomfortable when she said “outside of my race” - very exclusionary
matbur81@reddit
Definitely American... 😂😂
Silverdodger@reddit
Yup
reeblebeeble@reddit
If you go by TV adverts alone, there are actually no same-race couples in the UK
FireLadcouk@reddit
As someone in a mixed marriage. This isnt’t true. We’ve been randomly shouted at in the street or had comments made. Not always negative mind you and not a common occurrence neither but also not welcomed particularly
Ive definitely noticed subtle differences in how im treated with her too.
po2gdHaeKaYk@reddit
Coming from Canada, no I wouldn't say it's normal. It's more common, definitely, but not the norm. It depends on region and also the interracial mix as well.
However, one significant difference is that the UK is much more tight lipped about all things race. Unlike "melting pot" places like the US and Canada, race isn't openly discussed in the same way (at least until more recently with the immigration issues).
Just my two cents, having lived in Canada, the US, the UK, and being immigrant and in mixed race family.
Ngumo@reddit
Yep weird to ask. Don’t think about it.
uujjuu@reddit
it's mainly white city people who could so confidently say this.
Sco0basTeVen@reddit
Yeah they are not classed as interracial couple in the UK. They would just be a British couple.
Alone-Assistance6787@reddit
Unless one was a wizard and one was a druid.
bumblebeesanddaisies@reddit
Steady on!
Fat_Bottomed_Redhead@reddit
Hey, we'll have none of them shenanigans round here, thank you!
RobertTheSpruce@reddit
That's interclass.
InternationalCut5718@reddit
Please tell me you are also aware there are people who live here who are not British?
Sco0basTeVen@reddit
No I wasn’t aware of that.
catsandprozac@reddit
Came here to say the same.
Breakfastcrisis@reddit
It gives me the warm and fuzzies. I'm from a mixed heritage background and I absolutely love both sides of my cultural heritage. I can't really imagine coming from a single culture. I'm sure I miss out on some things of being attached to a single culture, but it's so nice having a rich and diverse cultural background. I always smile when I see mixed families, because I know they have what my family have and it gives me hope for the future.
Jefoss75@reddit
Have to agree with this, it’s part and parcel of daily life
IMissMyGpa@reddit
Exactly. More eyebrows would be raised if someone goes out with an American... :p
dvb70@reddit
It's mostly normal. The idea interracial couples never face racism though is not true. I know such a couple who are quite well to do who moved to a very affluent area and they got comments. Stuff like saying we are very tolerant around here which prompted them to ask tolerant of what exactly? It's funny the racism they reported all seems to be of the nature of people assuring them they were Ok with them and they had no problems with them which always got the couple asking well why would you not be Ok with us? People then apparently get flustered when they can't explain exactly why they felt they need to state they were Ok with them.
pineappleshampoo@reddit
Yeah it isn’t true. It’s interesting that some people are acting like this is a ridiculous question because interracial couples are so normal in the UK nobody even notices. Either they’re white or they have never set foot outside of a city.
explax@reddit
Same people who claim racism as a whole isn't a problem in the UK. Happens on Reddit all the time lol
romulus1991@reddit
Yep. As the product of an interracial couple, people do stare. They do make comments.
I'm half white, and even my partner and I occasionally get looks or dodgy comments. Maybe it's about where you are in the UK, I don't know.
mallegally-blonde@reddit
It’s sometimes overt too, although maybe more in previous generations. I know someone who’s mother was disowned for having children with a man who wasn’t white.
I guess at least her parents would be the ones considered weird/out of order though.
EldritchCleavage@reddit
There is racism about mixed couples. Not necessarily overt, but it’s there. Sadly racism seems to be having a bit of a renaissance, at least in my bit of Britain.
That said, generally people as a whole accept that people can and do marry whomever they want.
And mixed marriages are not a recent thing in Britain, which helps. There were a lot of them even in the 19th century, albeit limited to large cities and ports.
Valuable_Ad9554@reddit
Was thinking "how are they viewed? uh... They aren't?"
PimanSensei@reddit
And the same for most of Western Europe tbh
Tuloks@reddit
THIS. No one cares.
UnfeteredOne@reddit
Yeah, noone gives a shit here. We ain't good at being racist here I'm afraid
Choice-Ad-2725@reddit
Agreed, the very fact that someone highlight them as interracial couples is almist offensive.
It’s completely normalised here, but we still have minority bunch of dickheads that live in the Stone Age, I think there all party of the BNP. Plebs
Pure-Night-6164@reddit
Totally agree, it's not something you'd even notice here.
Insomniacbychoice90@reddit
This, I'm white and my missus is Gujarati, only had people actually funny when we've been abroad on our jollys
Fetch1965@reddit
As an Aussie I think it was such a weird question. Wow….. kinda blown away by this question.
Lexiepie@reddit
So glad someone said this - literally noone cares
Key-Sandwich-7568@reddit
This is the answer.
TriforcexD@reddit
You say that but amwf couples definitely gets loads of looks, even from those driving.
Various-Jellyfish132@reddit
Interracial couples aren't a thing here, they're just called couples
loaferuk123@reddit
Agreed…and that is something we should be very proud of.
kittenari@reddit
You've put it perfectly. I'm white and my partner is not, on the very few occasions that people have mentioned we're in an 'interracial relationship' we've literally looked at each other like ??????? Like, it doesn't even cross our minds so it's really weird when someone brings it up.
dbrown100103@reddit
Yeah, I had never thought anything of it and wouldn't even bat an eyelid
Last-Customer-2005@reddit
Same with Canada- the US is very behind culturally
DV_Zero_One@reddit
I'm 55 and the product of a mixed race marriage.. it's such a common circumstance that I legit forget that I'm even part of that cohort.
KitWith1Tea@reddit
Precisely this
ItsTheGreatRaymondo@reddit
I do agree. But one disgusting old acquaintance once told me that no decent man would ever want me because I, a white 20 year old girl, had once slept with a mixed race guy. He said it made me dirty, and lower value. He would bring it up all the time. Almost like it was friendly advice to never tell anyone and keep it a secret incase word got out! I would just shake my head and laugh at him pitifully.
MinMorts@reddit
agree, i instantly knew it was a non brit who asked the question
Chelsea_Ellie@reddit
100% what an odd question
RealisticPossible792@reddit
Because it is weird or at least it should be in this day and age.
Something is seriously wrong with our society that we've regressed into this hyper fication on race especially as someone that grew up in the 80's/90's who's always had friends of mixed races it never really entered the conversation until very recently (past 10 years or so) the culture has circled back into racism being a massive issue.
Maybe I'm super naieve but I can only speak on what I've experienced, I'll add that I've been in an interracial relationship for over 15 years and my partner and I have not experienced discrimination because we're an interratial couple and we've been to very homogeneous places where we stick out and we've not been harrassed for it.
It's almost like some parties have something to gain with making race relations such a big issue in this day an age almost like they want us divided or at least sow the seed that we are.
Virtue330@reddit
Yeah it's this for me too, it would be like asking someone what their opinion is on others having toast for breakfast.
AgentCooper86@reddit
I do agree, it’s very normal and people don’t tend to think anything about it at all, but when I was going out with someone of Iranian heritage we did get abuse shouted at us once. Unfortunately, there’s always a few idiots wherever you happen to be.
Top_Experience_7590@reddit
in your weird fantasy
Nobody_epic@reddit
I did a double take on the question and wondered what sub I was on tbh
DeemonPankaik@reddit
Two or three generations ago it was definitely controversial
Nowadays I would assume that anyone bringing it up is probably a bit racist
_Dan___@reddit
Absolutely, and it really is great that this is the case. The Uk isn’t all bad!
Poosay_Slayer@reddit
Absolutely bang on
asahilovesjjong@reddit
ngl it’s sad that they even have to ask this question… maybe their area in the us is very hostile that they had to ask to ensure their safety. they’re definitely safe, that’s for sure.
Groovy66@reddit
And it’s been like this for generations. I’m white as a sheet but related to boxer Michael Watson as his great grandmother and mine were sisters.
QuasarCollision@reddit
Exactly this
OopsMistake8475@reddit
Can confirm. Thought it was a weird post lol
CeleryEastern8993@reddit
Most? Not at all
macrowe777@reddit
Yeah this is a weird ass question.
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
I don’t like it either. Almost encouraging people to question it
fergie_89@reddit
I was thinking this. I wouldn't even think about it! It's just a couple...
Djinjja-Ninja@reddit
Just like all other couples. Through my binoculars while hiding in a bush outside their house.
EvilInky@reddit
Is it difficult to hold them steady with just the one hand, or do you use a tripod?
ihavebeenmostly@reddit
I'm guessing tripod, but you'd still have the jitters/furious shakes going on so lining up your eyes to get a good look during the good bits can be a challenge. I'd suggest adding a snug chin rest to that already well weighted (or bolted to the floor) tripod, it'd would help big time.
rezuaar@reddit
Genius
InevitableFox81194@reddit
This has been a hilarious thread. 🤣
anotherMrLizard@reddit
A good set of night-vision googles is defnitely worth the investment.
Few-Station8831@reddit
lol wrongun.
Whulad@reddit
America feels far more racially segregated than the UK
soulshock22@reddit
This
cdca@reddit
Americans seems preoccupied with race and ethnicity to a degree that it took me a while to get my head around.
As a kid I never understood why Americans on TV loved to identify as "Irish" or "Italian" when their family was American going back generations until I realised they were talking about their ethnicity, which was apparently super important.
The US seems like a strikingly racist place not in terms of bigotry, but in the strict definition of the term: considering race to be a very important component of one's identity. Even very progressive, non-bigoted Americans seem to spend a lot of time thinking about race as a concept.
I was really surprised to watch Last Week Tonight, a super progressive show hosted by a foreigner and see just how many jokes were about race or national stereotypes, and how those were always the jokes that got the biggest laughs.
-Icarium-@reddit
What's really frustrating is when their toxic culture spills over into ours, influencing impressionable people who then start parroting all the same talking points as if the US and UK were the same place.
We're not perfect - far from it - but we're different and face different issues.
WarmIntro@reddit
I like when people in the uk bore on about freedom of speech... we dont have that lol. Freedom of expression, very much so but very different things
InevitableFox81194@reddit
I love correcting people on twitter about this. It's freedom of expression, but not freedom from the consequences of that expression as per human rights law.
klabnix@reddit
The free speech thing is not too bad though. It just stops shit that shouldn’t be said and the people who have an issue with it are those that spread the shit
pinnacle126@reddit
I have an issue with our lack of free speech because it wastes police time and leads to ridiculous cases (people getting arrested for protesting the monarchy, posting rap lyrics, insulting veterans, the list goes on). The UK needs an equivalent of the first amendment.
WarmIntro@reddit
I don't disagree but the UK doesn't nor has it ever had it. People just seem to forget we aren't the 51st state 🤣
Yeah we can in fact say what we want, but the system is free to dish out consequences too lol
pinnacle126@reddit
Imagine a Russian saying “we can in fact criticise Putin, but the government is free to dish out consequences”. Our authoritarian restrictions on speech are shocking to virtually all Americans across the political spectrum.
luciferslandlord@reddit
Im embarrassed that we don't have freedom of speech tbh
MGD109@reddit
I mean legally we do. It's part of the 97 human rights act. We just don't have absolute freedom of speech.
To be fair neither does America though (just more than we do), so its kind of a moot point.
WarmIntro@reddit
Nope. The 98 human rights act article 10 is freedom of expression
"Freedom of expression
1, Everyone has the right to freedom of expression. This right shall include freedom to hold opinions and to receive and impart information and ideas without interference by public authority and regardless of frontiers. This Article shall not prevent States from requiring the licensing of broadcasting, television or cinema enterprises.
2, The exercise of these freedoms, since it carries with it duties and responsibilities, may be subject to such formalities, conditions, restrictions or penalties as are prescribed by law and are necessary in a democratic society, in the interests of national security, territorial integrity or public safety, for the prevention of disorder or crime, for the protection of health or morals, for the protection of the reputation or rights of others, for preventing the disclosure of information received in confidence, or for maintaining the authority and impartiality of the judiciary."
List of articles within the act https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1998/42/schedule/1/part/I
Happy to be wrong, if you have a better/newer source
Foreverythingareason@reddit
In the US the first amendment gives freedom of speech with restrictions such as inviting violence. In the UK article 10 of the human rights act grants freedom of speech with restrictions like you can't invite violence.
US https://constitution.congress.gov/browse/amendment-1/
UK https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1998/42/schedule/1/part/I/chapter/9
matomo23@reddit
But what’s that got to do with the topic though? I do agree with you, we don’t have freedom of speech. Close to it but not quite.
In the US you’re protected at a federal level. So you couldn’t be arrested for calling someone a racial slur. Here of course you could.
WarmIntro@reddit
It's to do with the fact Americanisms get cross wired and people here think it applies. It's mentioned above about the toxic culture transferring over, so I was adding to that
Thomasinarina@reddit
‘Chris Kaba was a victim of police brutality by the feds!’
BTZ9@reddit
Or when people over here scream ‘defund the police’. What the fuck do they think the tories spent the last decade doing?!
YourLizardOverlord@reddit
BLM ended up explaining that "defund the police" actually meant "give the police more resources so they can address their racism". It's almost as if US issues don't translate well to the UK.
BTZ9@reddit
Or when people over here scream ‘defund the police’. What the fuck do they think the tories spent the last decade doing?!
LauraPa1mer@reddit
"Their toxic culture", really? That's incredibly xenophobic.
worstcurrywurst@reddit
No. Some cultures are quite toxic. For examples ones that execute people for adultery.
LauraPa1mer@reddit
I would agree but the US doesn't execute people for adultery. So yes, some countries have toxic cultures. And there are elements of US culture which is toxic, for sure. But saying that US culture is toxic is xenophobic. You can try to polish that turd but it's still limiting to have these narrow beliefs about a country and its people and culture.
worstcurrywurst@reddit
They were obviously referencing that aspect of their culture that they view as toxic. You're being a bit overly sensitive when the meaning was clear.
LauraPa1mer@reddit
Maybe, but the anti-US sentiment is terrible overall. It just seems to be such an ugly side to the UK.
-Icarium-@reddit
For what it's worth, I more meant this aspect of their culture as opposed to US culture in its entirety.
There are many US authors, places, foods, films, music, etc that I love.
LauraPa1mer@reddit
That's fair
panic_puppet11@reddit
The demographics are so different that the race discourse in the US really doesn't translate well to the UK. USA's demographic is roughly 62% white, in the UK it's 83%. The black population of the USA is 12.5%, compared to the UK's 3.7% (which is also heavily geographically concentrated), and 4% of their population is Asian compared to our 8.7% - our Asian population skews heavily to South Asia (India, Pakistan, Bangladesh) and theirs is predominantly East/Central Asian (Chinese, Filipino, Vietnamese). The US also has a fairly large Hispanic demographic that is basically nonexistent over here.
Plus our differences and intolerances seem much more cultural-based than race-based, though the two are definitely interlinked.
apainintheokole@reddit
Part of it is because the country is young in comparison to many European countries. After all the Revolutionary War was only in the 1790's. They just don't have the sense of history and belonging that Europeans do with their countries.
Both-Pay7517@reddit
Australia is young and they don't do this
HobbyPlodder@reddit
Ah yes, because you guys are very chill on the topic of Roma or Irish Travellers.
cdca@reddit
I think I may not have explained myself well enough. I am not saying Britain does not have a racial bigotry problem. It absolutely does (Your examples are about a century out of date though, currently the scapegoats du jour are anyone who can be tarred with the "Muslim" brush).
I'm saying that racial theory appears more fundamental to US culture and identity than in other Western nations. I'm not saying Last Week Tonight is bigoted, it isn't, but the national preoccupation with race would seem strange even with bigoted entertainers in Europe.
HobbyPlodder@reddit
Wrong. If you're going to lie about this, then why would I listen to anything else you have to say?
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
As soon as an American on here says “I’m Italian American” I have the intense urge to downvote them. Often I see it used to back up their comment on the food subs. Your comment was completely valid without saying that you know.
It often transpires that the Italian part was from some great great granny on their dads side. Hardly Italian if you ask me
alancake@reddit
My paternal grandad was Scottish, my other 3 grandparents English, and though I love my Scottish heritage it's absolutely wild to me that if I was American I would most likely be calling myself Scottish to all and sundry! Hell my great grandkids would probably still be doing it.
Majestic_Clam@reddit
American here. I've noticed this too, and I think I can (a little bit) explain why we do this. One reason is that Indigenous Americans are the only people who are actually "American." Literally everyone else here is from a line of immigrants from someplace else.
I took a DNA test and I'm .1% American, ethnically. Culturally, sure, I talk loud at bars and drive an SUV, so: definitely American. But ethnically, it's a different story.
My relatives in Scotland and England are all nearly 100% Scottish or 100% English on their DNA tests, which I suspect is fairly common. So I can see why someone saying "I'm Scottish" in Scotland would seem stupid to the point of being annoying. You already know what it means to be Scottish. You know exactly which foods, customs, ideas, diseases, behaviors, etc. are Scottish.
We don’t have that in America.
I was raised knowing that my family very specifically came from "Germany and Ukraine." That’s why we celebrate Fastnacht Day and eat halupki.
But according to DNA, I’m only 2% German. Which also happens to be how Congolese, Arab, Ashkenazi Jewish, and Italian I apparently am. 30% Ukrainian. 60% Irish(!).
But I’d never have known any of this without a DNA test, because non-white, non-Christian history has historically been covered up in the United States - for example, little is known about anyone's Black ancestors here because they were considered property and not documented. Indigenous Americans were forced to assimilate and their history was also largely erased. Irish people in early America? Same.
Uncovering these secrets about my heritage has made me feel more in touch with my ancestors, and maybe even myself.
Once America has been around for another 700 or so years (hard to imagine after today’s news, sadly), I think people will more readily identify as "American," because being American by then might mean something more concrete and meaningful than "drives a truck, drinks watered-down beer, and loves guns."
unseemly_turbidity@reddit
Yeah, we know all that Americans being raised 'knowing' that they're Scottish or Irish or German or whatever. The bit we don't really understand is why you connect DNA with culture at all.
What it means to be Scottish is knowing the customs, foods, ideas etc, not having a DNA test that says you're 100% Scottish (which I think is unusual btw since I don't see how it could be separated so confidently from English or Irish.
My own DNA wouldn't say I'm 100% British or English. Assuming it matches my parents', it reflects the major waves of immigration inner London had over the last few hundred years - French (Huguenots), Italian, Ashkenazi and Irish as well as English and generic western European. It's weird that an American would think that makes me less a Londoner.
itwasmar0on@reddit
I think about this too! All my grandparents and both parents are English but I was born and brought up in Scotland and would never consider myself as anything other than Scottish. If I was born in America it would be a whole different story 🤣
matomo23@reddit
My grandparents on both sides were Irish, came here in the 30s. My paternal nan was brought up in Ireland for the most part though and has a strong Irish accent.
If I went and stood on Grafton Street and said “I’m Irish” with my accent the Irish would laugh at me. It’s such an American thing to do, but they expect better from Brits.
My Irish heritage barely ever comes up, only if someone asks about my surname.
DovahkiinForTheSoul@reddit
My maternal Grandmother is Scottish, maternal Grandfather is French but my mother calls herself Welsh because that’s where she was born and raised.
Americans are looking for cultural roots because they have none otherwise.
pjeedai@reddit
Paternal Grandad, Scottish, still have Great Aunts and family in the Loch Ness area, have a family tartan. Paternal Grandma Irish but grew up in Scotland.
Surname is Scottish, kids names are Scottish/Gaelic. Maternal line for my wife, Scottish.
Maternal side all born and bred Yorkshire.
So we grew up with 'proper' Tablet, shortbread, and Yorkshire puddings and Beef Dripping Chips because that's just what was the done thing.
But I never wear a kilt for weddings even though I could, and if asked I'd never describe myself as half / Scottish / Gaelic heritage.
It just is, I'm aware of it, carried on family names etc but I've never lived there and wouldn't claim anything more than that. Dad grew up between Liverpool and Burma (he was born there when Grandparents stationed there in WW2 and stayed on until it was no longer safe to be there) and he's far more militant Scouse than referencing his own more direct lineage to Scotland.
The idea of Muricans claiming some 1/18th share due to some long long long great great ancestor history makes them Scottish or Irish is always a bit... Try hard.
StrangeBandicoot8975@reddit
Exactly the same. Granded Scottish. Others English. Currently work for a Scottish company in Edinburgh. Never once for a nanosecond ever felt the slightest twinge of being any part Scottish. Shame, as I like Limmy.
forfar4@reddit
Usually they call themselves "Scotch"....
spicyzsurviving@reddit
The claim to Irish and Scottish heritage is also rampant
MixAway@reddit
Yeah it’s embarrassing. Their obsession with labelling themselves as Italian or whatever. No, you’re not!
RedSunWuKong@reddit
Great great granny who once ate a slice of pizza
doyathinkasaurus@reddit
Homeopathically Italian
codemonkeh87@reddit
That's not possible though as we all know Americans invented pizza
TNJDude@reddit
I'm Italian-American. It's mainly used as a descriptor to my upbringing. I'm American, but my fraternal grandparents were heavily Italian (Italian was spoken as much as English), and my maternal grandfather was Italian with American influences. We DID eat a lot of Italian-American food growing up. Some Polish was thrown in too from my maternal grandmother. I designate it as Italian-American because Americans added their own flair to the cuisine that you won't find in Italy. Like spaghetti and meatballs. That's not Italian, it's Italian-American. So in this country which is a huge mixture of cultures,
Scary_Twist_8072@reddit
I really hope this is just poorly timed satire.
20dogs@reddit
I don't know if you've spent much time with Americans but yes there are these differences in food, culture, references etc. it's not "Italian" but it's not mainstream American either.
Scary_Twist_8072@reddit
Eating spaghetti and meatballs is absolutely mainstream American.
TNJDude@reddit
No, the person I'm responding to believes the "Italian" people are describing was some distant thing with no effect on their culture.
matomo23@reddit
They hardly ever say “Italian American” though, they just say they’re Italian. As apparently the American bit is implied.
Silver-Appointment77@reddit
I get that too. My great grandparents were irish, but would never want to be called Irish English. Even though Im probably have more irish in me than they do.
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
I’ve wondered about this. Ireland and Scotland must definitely get American tourists attempting to be one with their “clan.” It must be very amusing. And yes, you’re probably quite right, they’re probably as Irish as a bottle of Baileys being sold deep in Essex
Silver-Appointment77@reddit
Ive been a pub in edinburgh when American tourists came in. They were loud and you could here them trying to put on their best Sco-ish (the way they said it) accent. Saying they were part of such and such clan. with people look at them as if theyre mad. No one cares about clans in tourist areas.
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
Gosh, I’d be absolutely cringing at that. And what’s with the accent? They only suffice in making themselves look like right muppets
SilverellaUK@reddit
1% Scottish, 99% Muppet.
Mr_SunnyBones@reddit
At least the still say 'American' , A lot of them drop that , and trying to explain to them that saying that they're "Irish" or "Italian " etc is confusing as hell. Also wrong. And then we're accused of gatekeeping being irish or Italian or Greek or whatever
codemonkeh87@reddit
Along with, "I'm not white I'm Italian/Spanish/Portugese/Georgian/Belarusian/German/French/InsertAnyOtherWhiteNationalityHere"
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
But they never want to be English and poor Wales doesn’t get much of a look in either
Blaueveilchen@reddit
I don't think that being Italian is that great.
Competitive_Art_4480@reddit
Even worse when they just say Italian.
aintbrokeDL@reddit
The thing you're missing there is that American's national fabric is more and striving to achieve because they don't have a shared heritage of more than a few hundred years. Most other countries have a shared heritage of a 1000-2000 where their ancestors will all be the same.
Maiaocean@reddit
Oh my god I've been saying this for so long, Americans are OBSESSED with race - to a point that it's actually disconcerting. I'm glad I'm not the only one who's noticed.
No-Deal-4444@reddit
In the same way Americans seem to claim Irish or Italian I could as well but I would never say I'm Irish even though my grandads Irish and thats not that distant and I have an Irish surname, because I didn't grow up Irish, have never been to Ireland and have never met any relatives apart from him that are Irish. I don't understand how you can claim to be Italian or Irish or something with none of those experiences or culture?
GreyLon1233@reddit
Their history is less than 300 years old as a country, whereas as an Englishman or a Scot if I had great grandparents who came from Ireland we would not remotely call ourselves "Irish" on that basis even if we are technically just as Irish as "Irish Americans".
Our race evolved here and we've been in the same 500 mile radius for over 10,000 years. So it comes across differently, whereas people's American identity is like being on a Mars colony and they're going on about where they came form.
Andechser@reddit
Don’t forget that the sheer concept of 'race' is itself completely unscientific and it stems from very dark times.
daern2@reddit
I'd go further and add that for a supposed classless society, they do seem to have created a system that loves to pigeon-hole citizens into their assigned place. I've always thought that, in reality, they're worse at this than we are - we might have the stereotyped upper, middle and lower classes, but they're extreme focus on "whaddya make last year?" has created a very strong caste system without anyone really noticing.
Joystic@reddit
We see race very differently.
In the UK our approach is to just shut up about it and treat everyone the same. If we can all do that everything else falls into place.
Americans see that as racist, they believe by ignoring it we’re perpetuating racism. They prefer to put race front and centre, always having it in the conversation as a means of tackling any racism head on.
I don’t think either is right or wrong, but I can tell you which one is a lot more fucking annoying.
cdca@reddit
I think that might be going a bit far. The UK has always had a major problem with racial bigotry, and we certainly don't "shut up and treat everyone the same". If only!
But US racial thinking seems more foundational to the culture, more baked in to society if that makes sense. Perhaps that's inevitable in a country ultimately made up entirely of immigrants, and racial slavery is its own can of worms.
But I do absolutely agree that it feels qualitatively different to European racial thinking.
Throwing_Daze@reddit
When I watch stand up comedy, not the big hour long shows, but like the short 5/10 minutes sets so many of the people form the US is based around race. And even if it is, there is always something about race in one of the jokes somewhere.
tradandtea123@reddit
I'm lost by how people in America can have families going back 200 years where they're all Irish or all Italian in a country with so many different groups of people.
There were huge numbers of Irish came to Britain in the 1800s but no one today in the UK would claim to be Irish because their family is from Ireland because after 200 years they intermarried with the British population to such an extent few would even know if a few of their distant relatives were Irish.
Silver-Appointment77@reddit
Theing that gets me are people who are African American. They get so much hate, yet most of them have been in America a lot longer than the ones calling them.
Drewski811@reddit
Because it is. Divisive politics will do that to a nation.
TheZamboon@reddit
Spend a day on r/unitedkingdom. That right there is the product of divisive politics.
_DoogieLion@reddit
God yeah, pure gammon heads and racists in there. Would argue that a chocolate teapot was the best kind of teapot if an immigrant pointed out it wasn’t.
InevitableFox81194@reddit
Dammit. I just joined thay sub as well, seems I need tonlesvebit before I even got to read any posts 😆
SaltySAX@reddit
Which is stupid considering they are a nation of immigrants.
UnacceptableUse@reddit
That's why they feel so strongly about it, they're afraid someone will do to them what they did to Native Americans
auntie_eggma@reddit
Exactly this.
A very large chunk of the American psyche is about preventing 'them' from doing to 'us' what 'we' are doing/have done/want to do to 'them'.
Undiagnosed_disorder@reddit
Ooooooh you’re onto something!
Crommington@reddit
Native Americans were a brutal and murderous society long before any Europeans turned up. They were utterly barbaric towards each other and would happily conquer another tribe, kill everyone and take their land. Then a bigger bully came and it happened to them. I’m not saying it was fair, but this idea people have that Native American was some big harmonious society is absolutely false.
bloopyblopper@reddit
"Europeans were a brutal and murderous society long before they ever went to America. They were utterly barbaric towards each other and would happily conquer each other, kill everyone, and take their land."
See how dumb you sound? You just generalised an entire group of people making up multiple nations as savages. The same could be said for literally every single human society up until the modern era.
There were some Native tribes that were war mongering yes, and others that weren't. Same as anywhere. Most Natives were not people living in tents, but people living in what were basically small cities with buildings and governments.
What point are you making? That Native Americans were human beings? Because as far as we know that's just how human beings and human societies operate. That doesn't justify the genocide of millions of innocents of any culture.
Archaemenes@reddit
Nobody here implied they were a faultless society. Way to build a strawman.
Crommington@reddit
Was a statement, not an argument
Archaemenes@reddit
What did making that statement contribute to the conversation then?
Crommington@reddit
Knowledge.
Archaemenes@reddit
You know as well as I that there’s always a right time and place to disseminate knowledge. I hardly see how your contribution was at all relevant to OP’s comment.
And as I said before, it seems needlessly strawman-y especially when you ended your comment with “but this idea people have that Native American was some big harmonious society is absolutely false” when no one thus far has expressed having that idea of Native Americans.
Crommington@reddit
It’s largely what people I’ve met believe about Native Americans. I’d say the right time and place to disseminate knowledge is on Reddit. I mean look, someone already commented with a counter argument. That’s the sort of thing I’m looking for on here. You know, on a website which is designed to have discussions.
Crommington@reddit
What are you contributing?
LOSS35@reddit
The "noble savage" myth is most likely just that, but the truth of it is we simply don't know for sure how violent Native American societies were before European contact because there's no written record.
Archaeological evidence like human remains with axe- and arrow-wounds certainly point to some tribes, particularly in the American Southwest, being warlike, while early European contact points to some tribes being friendly to outsiders. Here's how Christopher Columbus described the first tribe he encountered:
Crommington@reddit
Interesting, thanks 👍🏻
jkekoni@reddit
Also why they could not join many tribes against common enemy, when they had killed and got killed by their neighbours for centuries...
SCr3bl0rd@reddit
what a funny way of looking at it.
Crommington@reddit
It is true though.
UnacceptableUse@reddit
Maybe history really would repeat itsself then
__Joevahkiin__@reddit
Voluntary or otherwise
Putrid_Promotion_841@reddit
As is an awful lot of Europe and certainly Britain!
HawkOwn6260@reddit
Britain is a nation of immigrants? And... an awful lot of Europe?? So Brits and lots of other whites can claim no native land according to people like you.
I wonder if you would apply this logic to native Americans because their ancestors originally migrated over the berring strait from Siberia. Would you tell them they're a nation of immigrants? I don't really wonder because you definitely fucking wouldn't.
daern2@reddit
Well, technically we're a nation of our invaders - our "native" bloodline has a good chunk of French Norman and Dane, with a chunk of defeated Anglo Saxon in there for good measure. I'm not sure whether you'd count the Normans and Danes as "immigrants" but I guess, technically, they did come over here and stole our women, crown and lands. Probably claimed benefits too, the scroungers!
HawkOwn6260@reddit
Indeed. And that's true of basically all people everywhere. I'm not aware of which modern ethnic groups sprang out of the earth and stayed put in one spot for eternity.
But the wonderful 'progressive' people among us apply this logic very very selectively.
AquaMaz2305@reddit
Yeah, my understanding is that Brazil is also a nation of immigrants, but they seem to get on much better.
bigiszi@reddit
Not stupid considering they were built on chattel slavery.
BambooSound@reddit
Those immigrants enslaved people that they wanted to keep in a different part of town. Its cities' architecture was designed to keep different social classes apart.
XihuanNi-6784@reddit
No he means physically. They are literally hugely spacially segregated due to their history of legal apartheid, and then subsequent decades of no attempts to actually change that.
pease_pudding@reddit
That, and lazily brandishing the Bible to justify whatever prejudices appeal to you
Alternative_Beat2498@reddit
We can feel pride that as a nation we’re not very racist at all
ScreamingDizzBuster@reddit
I suggest it's the other way round: the politics are so divisive because they still haven't got over the civil war, which was a war of the purest racism.
daern2@reddit
I've offered several times to my US colleagues that if they're finding things a bit tough, we'll happily reintroduce British government for a generation or two until they've got themselves back on their feet again. We could probably even spare a few royals as breeding stock if they need them. I believe some are more enthusiastic about this than others...
jedisalsohere@reddit
Reconstruction being cut short is genuinely one of the great historical tragedies.
hiddenhare@reddit
If you look back at historical US politics, it was weirdly divisive and self-interested even before the civil war. It's always been a loose alliance of states who all kind of hate one another.
No_Camp_7@reddit
Well, and a history of slavery. Civil war over it and all.
aloogobee@reddit
Well people like Tommy Robinson are trying!
TheMrViper@reddit
The crazy thing that that USA does that they think is normal is they do this weird thing where they insist on referring to everyone's heritage even if they're third or fourth generation.
They're not proper Americans they're something "other".
African American Asian American
Virtual-Purple-5675@reddit
Yea that's not why
cheekyritz@reddit
Can attest. MANY Americans never really see other races in real time, they are in their apartments, grocery store, drive to work, etc vs the diaspora that you see walking or taking public transport in the UK. Different worlds even if the American city is multi-cultural.
PinkNeom@reddit
It explains why so many of them genuinely see Muslims in such an extreme and alien way. For many they have never met a Muslim in their real life and their only frame of reference is terrorism news, whilst in the UK most people are working next to Ahmed talking about football, pulling a Christmas cracker with Shazia at the work do and getting some samosas from Aysha down the road. Of course there’s still plenty of racists and Islamaphobes here but it’s not for lack of being around Muslims and it’s a bit different to the way those Americans view us.
I’ve literally had so many Americans say casual extreme things to me on Reddit like it’s perfectly normal and realistic to definitely think of me as a violent and evil person because I’m Muslim.
forfar4@reddit
Or... Having a Muslim lad turn up late to audition as a guitarist, apologies for being late as his shift had run over, ask if we mind him having a drink, wait for us to nod(!) and then pull out a bottle of vodka and take a swig.
People forget that a lot of Muslims are "Muslim" in the same way a lot of "Christians" are 'Christian" - go to the place of worship only for weddings and funerals.
callisstaa@reddit
Indonesia is like this too. Muslim nation but the majority of people still live fairly normal lives. I was visiting a friend there once when her mum came home, took off her hijab and grabbed us all a beer from the fridge. They would even drink during Ramadan. The idea that all Muslims are purists is kinda outdated
richardjohn@reddit
I have a colleague who is a strict Muslim but he fucking loves going to the pub to play pool/darts even if he's on the J20s.
Blaueveilchen@reddit
With Muslims it is a bit different because of their mosque's political culture.
rahsoft@reddit
..and with race.Ive seen plenty of segregation by race among muslims in multiple countries whenever I went to the mosque( the quiet biting back comments you hear from one race towards another). found that there was even assumptions made about what race my wife( former) had married. had muslims assuming that we were both arabs( the look on their faces when they met us!)
for us living in the middle east- my wife considered the worse was the british pakistanis working in finance and law in the gulf. Even told me of a meeting in a magic circle law firm( her employer) with them canvassing for business and her boss a british pakistani was telling her what they were saying( racist remarks). They all shut up when he told them that they were insulting their client.
Blaueveilchen@reddit
So, this means that Muslims can be quite raci*t. I was not aware of it.
ViscountessdAsbeau@reddit
I read somewhere that after Mo Salah came to Liverpool and quikcly established himself as an absolute standout player, Islamophobic incidents went down measureably. (Hate crimes, went down by 18.9% apparently).
People had a relateable Muslim hero.
https://www.skysports.com/football/news/11669/11734787/mohamed-salah-signing-has-reduced-islamophobia-and-hate-crime-rates-in-liverpool-study-finds
tradandtea123@reddit
And then you get Americans believing fox news saying that there are Muslim areas in the UK that the police or anyone else don't dare enter.
cheekyritz@reddit
Yes, I can name many Americans who have never been exposed to normal Muslims. It is seriously strange, and reinforces that great doesn't just mean a great GDP economy but many metrics such as culture, how aware the people are, etc.
HobbyPlodder@reddit
Because the UK is far more segregated by class, directly. In the US, race is a proxy for class
auntie_eggma@reddit
Having lived in both, it most definitely is.
Flangian@reddit
america is more segregated in all aspects of their country more than any other country in the world. its basically a third world country on roids
icemankiller8@reddit
There’s more minorities as a proportion of the population and there’s way more places that are significantly one minority race or ethnicity in comparison to the UK.
In the Uk you don’t really get this the same way, you actually see it in other places like France as well more than the UK.
Indomie_At_3AM@reddit
Even Australia is. I live in Sydney right now and all of the immigrants stick close to their own communities which is fine but they do it to such an extent. There’s suburbs which are pretty much exclusively a certain race
grumblingduke@reddit
It is.
The UK never had the same level of legally-mandated racism the US had. It had socially-enforced racism, but it was never a crime to be the wrong race in the wrong place.
In the US, mixed-race marriages were illegal in many places until 1967. Notably in Alabama the constitutional rule banning it wasn't formally repealed until 2000, when 40% of voters opposed removing it.
Bans on where people of different ethnicities can live, work, own property, who they can live with, what they can do have long-lasting effects.
MGD109@reddit
Well, it's the difference in legacy. The UK was a big player in the Slave trade, but never really had slaves in the UK (officially at least) and likewise, there never was a legal history of racial segregation in the UK (as in it was legal for businesses to discriminate against people based on race until the 1964 race relations act, but it was never legally required or even the real norm outside of some very elite places).
In the US meanwhile, it was the norm for much of their history and the effects still linger to this day.
Pargula_@reddit
Because of their obsession to label everyone.
SilverellaUK@reddit
I've heard Morgan Freeman saying that there should be no such thing as 'black history month' because it's just history.
Pargula_@reddit
The sad thing is that I'm sure you'd have white american democrats who strongly think that they know more about racism and discrimination than an 80 year old black man who actually went through it.
The_Blip@reddit
Yeah! Why can't they go back to the good ol' days before the PC era! I'm sure there were tons of international couples about then!
Pargula_@reddit
Correlation does not imply causation.
The_Blip@reddit
I don't see how that's relevant. There is no correlation between racial segregation and PC culture.
There IS a correlation between racial segregation and a recent history of institutionally enforced racial segregation. I would argue that there's pretty good evidence of causation there too.
Pargula_@reddit
If we were in the 1960s I'd agree with you, but not in 2024.
The_Blip@reddit
The 1960s? You mean the decade jim crow ended? A decade before redlining was outlawed? What do you think happened then? Half the black families and half the white families all suddenly swapped houses? That the intentionally under educated black population just suddenly started going to the prestigious white schools? All the black people were given booming promotions?
Do you think they outlawed racism and then suddenly everything was fixed?
Pargula_@reddit
It's been over 50 years, also other minorities seem to have managed within a generation or two despite the US being "systemically racist".
But you go ahead, continue focusing on keeping people down by labelling them as perpetual victims and unable to improve their lives themselves, now that's actually racist.
thelouisfanclub@reddit
It felt like that even before this current "woke" or whatever trend. I remember visiting US with my mixed family in the early 00s and getting that sense, that everyone was a bit siloed in their own communities.
The_Blip@reddit
The US has a relatively recent history of institutionally enforced segregation. They purposefully divided up areas and kept black people out of some while encouraging white people to go to the others. They also have a history of legally forbidding interracial marriages, interracial social social event, interracial work, and interracial education.
So all the black people and all the white people put down roots and built social boundaries in a legally enforced racially segregated society. Those legal enforcements have come down, but that doesn't mean people will break across those socially formed boundaries.
If you put a highway down the middle of a town and force black people on one side and white people on the other, they're not going to naturally cross that highway and integrate with one another, they'll naturally tend towards staying in their already formed communities.
So yeah, it isn't 'PC culture' that makes people racially segregate, it's racial segregation that makes people racially segregate. Even after the laws are repealed, it still has a lasting effect.
theonetrueteaboi@reddit
I'm pretty sure the American obsession with race was not caused by political correctness.
Pargula_@reddit
In 2024 it is and the labelling is a big part of it.
There seems to be an interest to keep focusing on what makes people different from each other and continue to divide them. And now you have an entire industry that profits from it and that is interested in keeping it alive for as long as possible: DEI.
theonetrueteaboi@reddit
The entire point of DEI is to discriminate in the favour of the discriminated and it mostly works. I will admit there are a few flawed examples, particularly diversity lectures or some other liberal stuff but on the whole it works. Also a lot of reason for this labelling is that sue to racism these groups have developed pretty strong identities and communities.
Last-Customer-2005@reddit
It is. I’m a Canadian living in USA but I’ve spent a lot of time in Europe. And the biggest culture shock moving to the US is the the divisive attitudes and segregation. Everything is extreme. I’m mixed race myself and date whoever is a hottie and would literally get stares and comments here when my partner looked like a different “race” than me.
wellyboot97@reddit
Because it is. Americans are obsessed with race for some reason. Here in the UK the vast majority of people aren’t bothered what someone’s skin colour or ethnicity is. A lot of the segregation issues here come from religion and cultural intolerances rather than race or ethnicity.
nethack47@reddit
There is a deep rabbit hole about how the US made sure the suburbs weren’t mixed. The cul-de-sac stare is universal however.
bigzyg33k@reddit
It absolutely scrambles their brains, I’ve known people who spent some time growing up there and the way they would talk about race was super off putting
Milky_Finger@reddit
I had a conversation with a black American the other day and he went into great detail about the difference between a black man from London and a black man from Texas. Very eye opening. The biggest difference is how one propagates their culture and their roots.
Former_Intern_8271@reddit
I think it depends where you are, I had a friend move over here recently from the US, they have Japanese parents, they couldn't believe the lack of diversity and receive a lot of awkward comments on a weekly basis, they say that here we have a handful of diverse hubs (the big cities in general) but as soon as you go to a mediocre small town it's a lot less diverse than they're used to.
They have a background in education and say that you can't go to a school in America without a big chunk of the children being POC, even in rural towns, here she often has classes made entirely of white English kids.
V65Pilot@reddit
It is. My state still had officially segregated schools into the 70's, and IIRC, there was still one school that was still segregated into the 80's, although I can't find the reference, it's just something I remember discovering. I remember because it shocked me at the time.
Silver-Appointment77@reddit
America is extremely racist. An inter racial couple moove to nice predominantly white area and everyone will judge them, and give them dirty looks, and in cases will abuse the couple. Its a horrible way to live
bulgarianlily@reddit
I was thinking this. When I was growing up in London, I never thought as my friends as in different groups due to skin colour, but in different groups due to what I was feed when visiting. Polish or Jewish food was just as exotic and interesting as Jamacan or Chinese. It would never occur to me to think that the first two were more in 'my group' than the last two. What was important was if you were 'us' or 'them', meaning living in this area or a dozen or more streets away.
wildrift91@reddit
Yes, it is. And so is Canada despite it's reputation due to direct influence from the yanks.
EddieHaskle@reddit
I’m sure they’re just called couples in the UK. Jesus….
WhatsGoingOnThen@reddit
People really don’t care, most don’t even notice or process it’s a thing. Not a single person I know would even consider it a thing, in the uk race is bought into the equation 99% of the time by the person of race who makes it a thing as for some reason they feel a victim.
InevitableFox81194@reddit
Honestly, in the UK, no one cares. They aren't inter racial anything. They are just a couple.
However, Brits are more likely to consider/notice your socio-economic background before they ever consider/notice your race.
America has racism, the UK has classism.
Nb, I'm not saying the UK doesn't have any racism I mean, more systemic.
FondantCrazy8307@reddit
I’ve never even thought about it until reading this post
Tiny_Distribution783@reddit
no one really cares about it
rinkydinkmink@reddit
People generally don't give a toss and barely even notice really, on the whole. It would maybe be a matter of mild interest if the cultures or religions were very different, and people may worry about a woman in particular marrying into a potentially restrictive or misogynistic situation, but not because of the colour of people's skin. I think people might give the side eye to what they suspect of being "mail order brides" but that's not very common at all here in reality.
I've had one friend of mine online who is a racist **** ask me over and over what I'd do if my daughter brought home a black guy and I was like ?????? It doesn't even seem like a real question to me. He's not actually American but was living there for a long time. I don't remember exactly where he's from but it's somewhere like Sweden or Finland iirc. Anyway he's abnormal mentally and not representative of that cultural background either.
Mango5389@reddit
A lot of people say they don't notice, but as a brown man married to a white woman, I've noticed it allot. I honestly think it comes down to where you live, if you're in cities no one looks at you twice but the moment you step into a smaller town regardless of how multicultural it is, people look and stare.
I've never had anything said to my face, but you feel the eyes and notice second glances as they walk past. It's a shame, but I don't like big cities, so I'll have to suck it up.
RockNMelanin@reddit
This is very much my experience too as a black man married to a white woman.
Interestingly I feel we got more looks when we had our first baby compared to now as a family of 5...
Vast_Cycle6990@reddit
Sorry you guys have to go through that. I'm a white fella with a black girlfriend and it seems perfectly acceptable that way round. Some way to go I guess.
spawnofbacon@reddit
Nope. I’m a mixed black woman whose last boyfriend was white - his friends were absolutely racist to me.
coldestclock@reddit
Just remembered this lady (white) that I used to work with who made jokes about being married to a black man. Shit like “going back to my mud hut”, and it was so fucking weird, everyone hated it. None of us had met her husband or anything so it seemed really out of pocket…
pineappleshampoo@reddit
The baby def got us looks! People would look at me (super pale) and then my biracial kid and comment he was a bit ‘swarthy’ or ‘dark’ before asking ‘is his dad, you know…’ while doing that motion where they pass their hand over their face. It amazed me how openly absolute strangers would comment on my child’s skin tone and ask me about it.
The other side was endless salivating rabid comments about how incredibly beautiful our son would be due to being biracial, like cartoon dogs after a pork chop. Like going on and on predicting his skin tone, eye colour, hair colour, features etc. and making out like he’d be the most stunning child in the universe.
It’s very weird being in an interracial relationship, in the UK, in 2024. Those saying it’s not even a thing anyone notices are very sheltered.
RockNMelanin@reddit
Oh I forgot about the unfinished questions!
I remember my wife telling me about a time she was out with her mum, sister and very white nieces and nephews. My SILs kids were asked "is daddy at work today?", whereas my wife got "is dad still...around or....?"
indecisivepelican@reddit
I just cringed so hard. My god, what goes through some people's heads??
RockNMelanin@reddit
I've lost track of the number of times I've heard comments behind our back (and to our faces) along the lines of "once you go black...." and "we can guess why she's with him".
People can be gross.
PsychologicalAd4430@reddit
I’ll tell you one thing for certain though: it doesn’t look a bit like ya!
fnigler@reddit
Not that it’s right, but there are plenty of people here who would call your wife a “race traitor”, or something to that effect. The UK is not free from racism like half of these comments suggest lol
RockNMelanin@reddit
We've both had comments to this effect over the years.
It's certainly not, it's less overt than it used to be but still very much there.
charg1nmalaz0r@reddit
That could also be a you thing though. You assume you are being looked at and judged or that people are thinking about you but in reality they probably arent. Most people are just trying to get through their shit day lol. My wife recently lost a lot of weight and she has informed me that people no longer stare and judge her. I said the same thing to her, lots of people in the uk are overweight and most people couldnt give a single thought to someone they dont know lol.
Thin-Juice-7062@reddit
Yh 100% I'm black. No offence to anyone but most people answering are white. I've had the same experience as yourself .
pineappleshampoo@reddit
I’m white and married to an Asian guy. I swear to god most white people just love to confidently assert racism isn’t a thing anymore and nobody in the UK even notices race and interracial couples don’t even register as interracial to anyone lol. This thread is eye opening.
Master_Bumblebee680@reddit
I think some of them are projecting their thoughts about it, saying they don’t see an issue with it which is probably true, but then projecting that onto the country as a whole. There is a lot of racism still in the UK, the only thing I will say is I believe it’s less so than other white European countries by quite a mile, especially in cities
Weak-Possession-7650@reddit
Where you're living likely has an effect on it. Some parts of the UK are more "white" than others. An interracial couple in London? Most people wouldn't blink twice. There will always be a minority of racist people everywhere, however. You can never say never.
peepiss69@reddit
This is honestly kinda sad to even have to say but this comment is so validating as an Asian bcuz whenever I’m on a UK sub that starts talking abt smth racial, I’m always being told by white people that I don’t experience racism and they allegedly experience just as much (or worse because apparently poc get bonuses that they don’t… yeah because we aren’t born with an inherent privilege). Lmfao 💀
Thin-Juice-7062@reddit
Yh I feel like a lot of people saying it doesn't exist are saying it to try and get one over America.
pineappleshampoo@reddit
Yeah. It’s giving ‘does sexism exist in the UK?’ Every man: ‘nope! Never! Not a thing anymore! It’s strange you’d even ask!!’
Mobile_Choice_5143@reddit
Asian, had the same experience, most Asians and blacks I've spoken to have had some sort of looks, comments, passive aggressiveness. Comments are definitely from a white perspective
fitzonatisch@reddit
agreed
i'm happy for the people who've never experienced these issues but i'm also sad that people seem to think there are no issues
i think this country is generally chill about interracial relationships and i believe it's improving, but i feel like the comments saying it's a non issue, nobody gives a shit etc. are naive or wishful thinking. we do not live in a beautiful, post racial utopia
source: have been in an interracial marriage for 20 years, in london, have enough depressing anecdotes from my own experiences and those of friends in similar situations
endoplanet@reddit
I feel like some people could be a bit parnoid though, or over-sensitive. The issue most of them talk about is "looks". How are you even gonna know why some prick's giving you funny looks? If that happens to me I don't necessarily assume it's about race. There's plenty of non-racist snooty cunts in this country. Or maybe there's something wrong with their eyes. End of the day, I don't give a shit. If that's the worst racism I'll ever experience, bring it on. In most cases I probably won't even notice. Try day-dreaming more and giving a fuck less.
RockNMelanin@reddit
We aren't talking about a glance that you would notice when we talk about getting looks.
It's the turning of heads, the stares, the being looked up and down, being watched as you go about your business. Honestly as a black guy who has experienced racism in various forms with different levels of aggression since I was a little kid, you get to know "the looks" and develop a sixth sense for when to really keep your head on a swivel or just leave a place.
lurkerjade@reddit
Yup. White people in Britain love to pretend that racism doesn’t exist here, but it absolutely does. My ex got jumped on a night out once (a few years ago but still comparatively recent) because he mentioned I was Indian and some lads started on him for “going out with a p*ki”, this shit sadly still happens.
LimitOk5951@reddit
My partner didn't get jumped but he used to work in south east England and his boss called me one (I'm Indian) and he quit. A lot of people in that area said things about me to him, I think he spared me most of it, I only found out because I berated him for quitting "randomly". Wales is better but there is nowhere in the UK that isn't racist. This thread is so shocking to me tbh
Same_Grouness@reddit
Happens the other way too, my mate was approached by another Asian guy once to threaten him for hanging out with kafirs.
gordandisto@reddit
Real. Being East Asian me and my ex gf got stared in a small town like we haven't showered for days. People speaking out their arses pretending they know what they talking bout in this thread.
PsychologicalAd4430@reddit
I certainly would say something. Done it hundreds of times. You ruin my day I ruin yours.
Clark-Kent@reddit
Yep, I've noticed stuff like that too
Am a white man who's mostly dated black and Asian women
A few "friends" of mine made comments about heritage and status etc, don't speak to them anymore
And a few comments from extended family members about religion and skin tones
Generally no issues, from Birmingham, but sometimes you get " that look" And you know exactly what it means
And I know for avoid certain situations and social moods
Casual racism is a part of the UK, and that's a shameful truth, maybe we don't all say the N or P word, but people here are very comfortable about being uncomfortable when more races are allowed in higher positions or in prominent situations
People in this subreddit saying people don't see race, tell me how many people not white you spend time with in your house and with your family?
My gf had issues like that, she was friends with a group, but was never invited to dinners and local events, always a distance
ToothDoctor24@reddit
I have to agree. I had a job in a posh town once, only half an hour from my big diverse city so didn't think anything of it. The fact it was the only NHS practice in the whole town should have told me something. I'm dark and hijabi. When I walked into the local restaurant literally the whole restaurant went silent. It was the most dramatic thing I've ever seen.
JonJo42@reddit
I’m from South Wales, and I’ve had the same reaction walking into a village pub in North Wales. Total silence in the bar as I ordered a pint in English.
pineappleshampoo@reddit
My Asian husband and I have a code. When we are somewhere unfamiliar, if we are finding a pub or restaurant or something, we walk in, and if he squeezes my hand it’s code we both understand. It means look around like we’re tryna find someone who isn’t there, before leaving.
ToothDoctor24@reddit
That's quite sweet. Wishing you a long, happy and healthy marriage
antiquatedsheep@reddit
This. I'm a brown woman living up north in a small-ish city and the looks I get when I'm out with any white man, romantic or otherwise, are weird! Was in a cafe with a coworker recently and this middle-aged gentleman stared for so long that even my colleague got uncomfortable. We were literally having coffee, talking about work, and had our notes open on the desk! The woman who was with this man noticed as well at some point, and I was hoping she'd tell him to please behave but instead she started turning in her seat to look at us as well. They were both white in this case but people of my own race can be as creepy, and I've heard drunk brown men slur plenty about how "all desi girls come to the UK and become (insert obscenities here)". It's a race thing, it's also a gender thing 🤷🏽♀️
solar-powered-potato@reddit
Yeah, it's nice so many people in these comments seem to really not care, but that's not always the case.
I'm white, my husband is mixed (white mum, Indian dad), we get looks and odd behaviour at times. Sometimes when people confirm we're a couple they ask if he's Polynesian or Mexican (??), because apparently that would make more "sense"? My cousin (half Iranian) and her husband (Zimbabwean) live in a small village and get it even worse.
OhhLongDongson@reddit
I think this is a bit of a Reddit echo chamber moment unfortunately. Like you say, it’s great that people in these comments think like that.
But there’s certainly still a fair bit of racism around in day to day life for some people in some areas that could impact a relationship as described.
asphytotalxtc@reddit
You speak the truth to be honest here. I remember sitting with my friends during the whole "black lives matter" marches and said "of all the places, why here, there's literally NO RACISM here at all!"
I learned that, in fact, there is still a LOT of racism here. And I was shocked. I did not expect to hear some of the stories I was told that day...
relaxing_sausage@reddit
I am stunned at all these 'no racism here!' comments. I think a lot of people are just picturing their ideal situation, not thinking about every day reality. I think a point when racism against interracial couples becomes really noticeable (and also intersected with misogyny) is when people see a couple and notice/comment on/speculate about the origin of their baby. That kind of comment is so much rarer when both parents appear to be the same ethnicity.
pineappleshampoo@reddit
Yeah this. It’s nice that people are weighing in saying it’s not an issue and people don’t even notice. But it’s not… true lol. White woman married to an Asian man, 100% we get looks and comments and stares, mostly from other Asians.
hammockinggirl@reddit
My friends are an interracial couple, he is south Asian and she is white. They live in a relatively small affluent town in middle England. They get some looks, mainly from the Asian community funnily enough. Sometimes they find it an issue in restaurants and public places where the husband will be ignored in favour of the wife but it’s much less common now. Plus we’re not far from Coventry where it’s very normal.
Silver-Appointment77@reddit
I stare at a man with a black wife, but its not because of colour. Its how different they are. Hes about 6 foot 4 and really skinny, yet his wife is around 5 foot tops, quite plump with these enormous boobs. The difference is amazing.
Although i do the same with everyone where the size difference is opposite of each other.
Are you and your wife like that?
botwewa@reddit
Yeah there are so many presumably white people here saying they don’t care but reality says otherwise. I also think the type of pairing plays a role too. Black men with white women are far more normalised in society and black women with white men. Not saying it’s a bad thing at all but I think a white man with a POC gets more stares than anyone else. My husband (white) makes it a point to hold my hand even more when we’re getting stares and I love that he doesn’t feel a way about it because I do sometimes - like I’ve done something wrong.
scupdoodleydoo@reddit
I’ve heard a lot of people say shocking racist things in the UK, worse than anything I ever heard in the US, but it seems everyone wanted to have a nice little circlejerk in the comments.
Poosay_Slayer@reddit
When you catch them staring give her a big smooch to really rub it in!
Sorry that happens to you though man, people should keep their nose out.
WillWork4Cassrole@reddit
I’ve had pretty much the same experience in the states. We’ve been together for years and have been all over America. I’ve never had a word said to me, but smaller towns are always where you get the looks. It bothered me when I was younger, but now I try to assume it’s just a piqued interest because we aren’t the norm. Bigger cities are always the same though: just another random couple you walk by and barely notice.
We’re in the same boat, as far as not wanting to live in a big city, so it’s just a normal part of life at this point lol.
Great_Orange_8704@reddit
I will be honest and I’m not trying to be mean, it doesn’t solve anything and it doesn’t win people over to my side.
I’m in an interracial marriage and I don’t know why someone is interested in my personal life. We’re not some kind of progressive political commentary on life. If anything it’s belittling that you love the fact that I’m married to someone of another race and treat us differently to others because of our skin colour.
Just treat us as any other couple independent of our race please.
Trigg_UK@reddit
Most people don't give it a second thought. Of course, there are always ones that disapprove.
hawkida@reddit
I remember an interaction I heard a few years back:
American: What do you call an interracial couple in the UK?
Brit: Uh... a couple?
Says it all really. I think it was raised around the question of whether Prince William should be "allowed" to marry Meghan. I think if you asked that question alone, the reason most Brits would think someone might not condone it is because she was an actress and commoner, rather than because of her skin colour.
AxeWieldingWoodElf@reddit
There was a bit of racism against her, but the majority were not bothered so much by her skin colour but more so because she was an American.
chartupdate@reddit
It was news to many people that she was supposed to be black. I had no clue.
spawnofbacon@reddit
She wasn’t ’supposed to be black’ - she’s literally half-black. This is exactly the type of thinly veiled racism typical of the UK, but you all think you’re superior to Americans because you’re not waving Confederate flags.
yellowsubmarine45@reddit
Also, I don't think people remember how much abuse Kate got because she was "common" and her parents had jobs! Gasp!
Obviously when Meghan joined the royals, Kate was cast as a the good princess, but there were years of nastiness before that
Great_Tradition996@reddit
Kate was very unkindly referred to as “Waity Katy” by a lot of the tabloid press, and her mum’s previous employment as an “air hostess” was raised at every opportunity. However, she never, ever rose to it and is now one of the most well-thought of members of the royal family. I genuinely don’t think anyone (aside from actual racists, none of whom should ever be listened to) had an issue with Meghan Markle because of her ethnicity/skin colour; in fact, many people thought it incredibly positive that the monarchy was diversifying. (I didn’t actually realise at first MM was mixed race; I thought she was just olive skinned). The press were also, in general, far warmer towards her than they were Kate (at the start of their respective relationships); it was only when the various issues started coming to the fore that people turned against her. I still don’t believe that the public (as a whole) had any problem with her being mixed race; it was when she alluded to it being William and Kate who had made the ‘racist’ remarks that everything erupted. Obviously, nobody knows for sure what was said (bar those actually present), but I would guess that it was more along the lines of, “I wonder who the baby will look like/favour” when she was pregnant with Archie. That’s a completely normal thing for people to wonder: will s/he have dad’s Roman nose; will s/he have grandma’s wild curls - how anyone could infer anything racist from this is puzzling
mmoonbelly@reddit
The hate continues to the extent that she’s rarely referred to by her own name : Catherine ; she was never a Kate.
ampattenden@reddit
I thought Catherine was her royal name and Kate was her original name?
fistchrist@reddit
Nah, there were stories in the Sun about how “Harry’s new girlfriend is Straight Outta Compton!” before they were even engaged.
Own-Plankton-6245@reddit
The dislike of Meghan has nothing to do with her skin colour or heritage, it is because of her actions and behaviour, she is arrogant, Ignorant of tradition and unwilling to learn, She has poisoned Harry's mind, turning him from a lovable scoundrel type to a downright miserable, hateful, spiteful individual just like her, she tells so many lies and when she's disproven she claims she never said it.
ToothDoctor24@reddit
Very much Daily Mail type racism though, I can't think of a better way to describe it. Like the type of cheap chavvy asbo related racism everyone looks down on
TheGreekScorpion@reddit
Was the Daily Mail the newspaper that kept doing dogwhistles about her?
hebejebez@reddit
As a Brit who now lives in Australia I had a couple people ask me why England was being racist and I was like - I mean some will be racists but this is actually classism. They think an American actress is not good enough for a prince. Mostly (looking at you BNP people) wouldn’t be about the colour of her skin at all just middle class people thinking well she’s not an earls daughter so she’s not good enough.
AxeWieldingWoodElf@reddit
There was classism too. It doesn’t need to be one or the other. People have their various prejudices.
doyathinkasaurus@reddit
I think her being seen as a pushy American was probably the dominant motivation - though I've no doubt many are racists as well, until the wedding when her mum was filmed, a LOT of Brits had no idea she was biracial
BlueTrin2020@reddit
lol imagine the convo.
American: do you think Meghan should be allowed to marry Harry
us: no way, she’s an effing Yank
apainintheokole@reddit
No - it was more because she didn't come across as a nice person and because she seemed too much of a Diva! Also because she wasn't willing to do the duties the role required of her.
Few-Station8831@reddit
It’s not just skin colour or being American Megan Markle’s absolutely stunning and has enjoyed some success in her career so automatically the press wanted to take her down a peg or two.
Tbf Doesn’t help that at times she’s comes across as bit of a whiny twat and feeds perception she made “our Harry” into a whiny twat also. Despite all her good deeds and there’s a fair shout on her being a decent person that’s the take away imho
Longirl@reddit
I loved her until all the dad stuff came out. I feel really sorry for her father, he’s been discarded. It doesn’t strike me as something someone who is kind would do.
forfar4@reddit
"A bit of racism" AKA "The Daily Mail"
Beautiful-Control161@reddit
Not even that she was American. More so she's a pretentious cunt 🤣
asphytotalxtc@reddit
I genuinely remember a conversation like this, with an American tourist in London at the time...
"Do you think Meghan should be even allowed to marry a prince??!"
"Absolutely not, what a horrid self serving bitch! Harry could do SO much better!"
"No that's not what I meant, I mean because of her colour?"
"Wait, what? Why would that be an issue?"
el_grort@reddit
Was I the only person who found out she was apparently not white veeeery late?
mand71@reddit
I watched Suits ages ago and didn't even realise that; she's just tanned IMO. Not that it matters one bit...
Independent-Guess-79@reddit
This is also a thing in the Uk. We don’t really see colour in the same way the yanks do. I had no idea she wasn’t “white”. I always thought “she’s fit” and left it at that
wOlfLisK@reddit
I've recently been watching Suits for the first time (side note, because I know her mostly for marrying Harry it feels very weird to see a literal princess be half naked in some scenes) and I'm not sure I even realised she wasn't white until Wendell Pierce showed up as her father.
Astrokiwi@reddit
I think it's more specific than that - the specific racial history of the US has led them to have a very broad definition of "black". Race and ethnicity are of course arbitrary and culturally defined, and they the way they think about race does makes sense within the US context. But in the UK and other countries, we have a different history, and think about race differently, so someone who was born in the UK might think of themselves as "one quarter Ghanan", while being born to the same parents in the US might think of themselves as just "black".
But yeah, it does cause some confusing moments.
YourLizardOverlord@reddit
The US had the 'one drop rule'. Most other countries that do racism have grades of whiteness where a paler skin pushes you further up the hierarchy.
Nissa-Nissa@reddit
It’s so funny how we talk about mixed race people. Obama, meghan have as many white parents and they do black parents. Concern that a child who will be like 9th in line to the throne has one black grandparent was truly insane.
Medical_Band_1556@reddit
I was thinking about this the other day. Is it not kind of racist that to be considered "white" you need to be 100% white, but to be considered "black" you can be like 12.5% black?
iLLz13@reddit
It’s the “one drop rule,” comes from slavery times in order to prevent the products of rape from inheriting from their rapist fathers
RedditDetector@reddit
I only found out by Americans talking about about it, saying how badly British people were reacting to it. While I'm now aware some of the usual newspapers were going on as they do, I've never heard a single British person mention it negatively.
decentlyfair@reddit
Me too. Also I only found out a couple of years ago that Mariah Carey wasn’t white also Vanessa Williams. This is largely because it is a non-issue. I went to school in a very white city and there was one girl of mixed race and I didn’t even realise this until 40 years after I left school. She was always just ‘Angela’ to me.
Simple-Passion-5919@reddit
Pointing this out is considered hateful to Americans.
KillerDr3w@reddit
Nope!
I also had no idea.
fishface-1977@reddit
I had no idea to be honest.
Master_Bumblebee680@reddit
Bro change it quick! It’s Harry not William who is with Meghan
geyeetet@reddit
I remember people being far more upset that she was American than that she wasn't white lol
Gavcradd@reddit
I had an argument (well, more of a heated conversation) with my wife about this. We'd watched all of Suits together and I'd never even once thought of Meghan as any different race than us (well, apart from her being American). Boggled my mind that (a) she is apparantly and (b) even if so, it matters to anyone.
Kingreaper@reddit
Wait, Meghan Markle isn't white?
I don't particularly follow royal news, but I've heard about her and seen images of her multiple times and I honestly had no idea that she wasn't considered white.
welshfach@reddit
Also the question of 'what do you called African Americans born in the UK?' - yes I have seen exactly this question on reddit.
Ummm....British. Just British.
asthecrowruns@reddit
Americans calling out black British people for saying they’re black. The proper term is “African American”. Bro, they’re British, what?
The_Blip@reddit
We pair a lot heavier on class. Bit odd to marry outside your class, but not insane. Race isn't even a factor to most people.
ToothDoctor24@reddit
It's frigging hard when you marry outside your class though. One partner is almost always going to feel left out in the other's circles.
The_Blip@reddit
Class is deeply ingrained in our society in ways that many others (especially Americans) can't understand.
It's not about wealth, education, or job. They're all somewhat linked, but at its core, that's not what it is. It's entrenched social norms taught from childhood. If you grew up with working class parents, in a working class community, with working class families, you learnt how to act working class. Same for middle class, same for upper class.
You learn all the social cues, the way to act, the way to talk, the way to think, all the ways to 'fit in'. When you try and leave that group who learnt all the same social expectations as you and mingle with those who learnt completely different ones, you can just feel like you don't fit in. It's not that there's anything wrong with them, or anything wrong with you, it just doesn't gel in a way that feels natural.
It's obviously not impossible to get along outside of class lines. But a combination of it being deeply ingrained culture, and our national culture generally leaning on the less expressive, more reserved, and subtler side, make it hard for people to understand.
Used-Needleworker719@reddit
Remember the utter stick that Millie Mackintosh and Professor Green had when they were married? People genuinely couldn’t compute being in a relationship outside of their social class
ToothDoctor24@reddit
No I don't but I had this earworm of a song in my head for a while where a posh girl was saying to Professor Green "just be good to me" a few years back. I wonder if that's related or written about them.
gigglesmcsdinosaur@reddit
I think the bigger issue there was him being already married to Kate and Meghan being with Harry!
MerryWalrus@reddit
The Aristocrats!
Wait until you hear this weird family tradition involving the naughty uncle...
UpsetMarsupial@reddit
Is that the one who had an "incident" at a pizza restaurant?
Silent_Intrusion@reddit
How is everyone glossing over this!! 🤣
newtonbase@reddit
I didn't even notice 😂
Late-Champion8678@reddit
I was wondering if I’d had a hit my head or something! 😂
hawkida@reddit
Oops! I'm no royal follower, as is clear. Sorry for the goof. Main point still stands though.
neilkeeler@reddit
No wonder they 'fell out'.
Zack_Knifed@reddit
God damn I laughed hard at this 😂😂😂
grey-zone@reddit
😂
starderpderp@reddit
To this date, I'm still shocked that the trashy news were using race as a reason that Megan shouldn't marry Harry.
I was even more shocked that she was upset by it.
That's when I really came to understand just how bad racism is in America for her to be deeply affected by it. Because, anyone here, would just instantly realise the news outlet is just stirring shit that nobody cares about.
Inevitable_Boss9425@reddit
I thought everyone was upset because she was a divorced American, and we all know what happened the last time one of those got to the royal family....
Choo_Choo_Bitches@reddit
She was twice divorced. He must have picked up his Dad's taste for divorcees, scandalous!
AliveAd2219@reddit
Sorry but it was Harry not William who married Meghan Merkin.
ToothDoctor24@reddit
Meghan who
asmeile@reddit
Come on you must know Meghan the pubic wig
ToothDoctor24@reddit
Are you fr
Acerhand@reddit
Yeah. I noticed Americans made a huge thing out of those two like it was some massive race issue and still wont stfu about it. Spun it as a story of British public being racist and against it etc… when not a single person here i know even mentioned or cared about her race. It was as you said
King_Kai_The_First@reddit
Yeah I think that whole Meghan thing was idiotic but it was mostly them being a bit scandalised she was an american actress, which was considered "crass" on both counts.
Awordofinterest@reddit
I disagree
So Meghan (Who married Harry) is a commoner, sure, But so is Catherine (Who married Prince William) (although some ties to king Edward III although I think it's something like 1 in 3 Brits have ties to Edward III) Princess Diana who married Charles was also a commoner.
Princess Eugene married a commoner, Princess Margerette too, Princess Anne married 2 commoners (One was a Royal Navy Officer), Prince Edward also married a commoner.
yellowsubmarine45@reddit
Kate got a LOT of abuse and many sarcastic comments about her parents because she was too "common"
fanta_fantasist@reddit
We’ve definitely had some unusual comments here ( Scotland).
bambaveli@reddit
It’s a non issue, I’m nearly 40 and I’ve never heard anyone say anything negative about people in interracial relationships, I’ve never even heard any old people say anything negative regarding it.
The only ‘racist’ stuff you’ll hear in the UK will be about people from a certain religion. Apart from the odd nutter people here don’t care about the colour of peoples skin.
fingersarnie@reddit
It depends where you live. I live in an area that’s so white, the Klan would think it’s not diverse enough!
Most urban areas people don’t care.
Now seaside towns…they’re a different breed altogether…20 years behind in fashion, culture and views.
xxhamsters12@reddit
In the uk we couldn’t give a flying fuck what you do as long as you don’t bother anyone physically no one will care. We’re quite unbothered people
Another_Random_Chap@reddit
Depends how racist they are! And some of the minorities can be incredibly racist.
My neighbours are white & 2nd generation black Ghanaian on one side, and white & Thai the other.
The sooner we're all light-brown, the better.
charg1nmalaz0r@reddit
lmao i had weird images of some mandated sex drive to combat racism to breed out all our differences when i read your comment lol.
City_Impossible@reddit
Very accepted and easy to come by because the generation of us that our in our lates twenties and 30s now had diverse classes in school from the reception age
Dazzling-Event-2450@reddit
The only comment we get is how absolutely beautiful our kids are.
taxbitch@reddit
Beautiful yes.. but quite often followed 'such lovely caramel skin' in my experience. Which I never quite know how to respond to tbh!
charg1nmalaz0r@reddit
i mean its a weird comment for sure but they are hardly being nasty so just say thanks lol. I mean its no different then someone commenting on my hair colour as a child because it is fairly unique.
benjaminchang1@reddit
I think my mum got that comment when my brother and I were babies because we're half Chinese and half white.
Then-Fix-2012@reddit
Our kids are mixed Chinese/White and when we’re in China practically every single person we pass on the street makes a comment on how good looking or cute they are.
Happens here too but I think people don’t really notice they’re mixed if they’re out with just one parent as they can probably pass as either white or Chinese.
ToothDoctor24@reddit
There's a term for this on tiktok called Wasian and I think it's meant to be a flex
Surface_Detail@reddit
Legit, this must feel like a lot to live up to as a kid growing up.
ToothDoctor24@reddit
What races are you if you don't mind my asking?
We have a few races in our family and honestly certain ones make not as good looking kids as others!
South Asian + East Asian though 👌
No_Cartographer_3517@reddit
Welcome to Britain, where everyone shags everyone, and we love it 🤣
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
'Interracial couple' is not even a term in modern UK and I think you would be hard pressed to find many people under, say 50 years old who even think in those terms.
I guess my other half and I are what you would call 'interracial' but it has never really cropped up as a major topic of discussion between us or anyone else.
Alex030222@reddit
As someone almost 30…
I don’t think it’s always a case of going “oh look there’s an interracial couple”, but it’s a simple acknowledgement that people are of different races - the same way you might notice someone is tall or someone is short. People are different, and there’s no issue with different people being together.
I think saying a couple is interracial is fine depending on the context. E.g. if you go to the doctors, do you need to tell me the doctor who saw you was Asian/Black/White if it’s not relevant to what you’re actually saying? Probably not.
As someone biracial and in an interracial marriage, the conversation has cropped up - I see it as very important to be honest.
If someone ignores my race they are ignoring part of what makes me me. It’s not a conversation to have with everyone/anyone, but with a life partner, very important to me.
howareyoutodayoncher@reddit
If you’re biracial, does that mean you are dating ‘interracially’ regardless of which ‘half’ you’re dating? 🤔 Or I guess if you’re dating someone not biracial in the same way?
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
I think you are conflating two issues here. It isn't noticing that some people are tall and short; it is highlighting a couple where one is tall and the other is short. We talk of tall and short people all the time but never about mixed height relationships.
Again, see above. This is not an analogous situation at all. I have never heard anyone talk about a mixed race doctors practice for example. That would be completely bizarre. I mean do people say 'ah, I see you work in an interracial company... your colleagues aren't all of the same racial background'
Same thing again. I am specifically referring to 'interracial'. It has nothing to do with ignoring race, ethnic background etc. it is the point about focusing on two people of different race or backgrounds being together that is the unusual part. Our individual family backgrounds have definitely cropped up in conversation with my partner; the thing that hasn't is that we are an interracial couple. Two seperate matters.
Alex030222@reddit
Since we are being pedantic today…
The question was how are interracial couples viewed in the U.K. - not necessarily whether or not interracial couples are highlighted.
You are saying definitively that interracial is not a term in modern U.K. - how do you define modern U.K.? I have personally heard and used the term a lot.
You also said you think “you would be hard pressed to find many people under, say 50… who even think in those terms”, however you are now talking about the difference between noticing and highlighting. I think if someone notices, they are thinking to some degree.
Again to my point above, I don’t know who you are talking on behalf of, because I have heard conversations on mixed height relationships…
The same way I have received similar comments to OP, in the U.K.
I feel like your experience has been very different to mine, because I have also certainly heard people comment on the races of people at the doctors practice, the supermarket, and many other places…
I think the situations are certainly comparable, if we are talking about noticing race and as you say “highlighting” it too.
I personally don’t understand how you can acknowledge you are different races but not an interracial couple… but I am really happy you have each other and you are accepting of each other. Genuinely.
I actually think we are just discussing labelling so I can understand our difference of opinion tbh! I didn’t look at this thread as just a convo on the word interracial, but more about two people of different races being together.
I rest my case lol 😂
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
It is not pedantic, it is a qualitative difference but your response here shows that you aren't understanding the difference still.
As I said, I acknowledge that some people are short and tall and this facet of their physicality could be relevant in many circumstances and be the basis of comment or discussion. Mixed height couples almost never are.
Alex030222@reddit
I really hope you don’t see this as a challenge to your own personal experience - it isn’t. I actually haven’t seen where you discuss your personal experiences, I only replied to your initial post. I’m glad you didn’t experience any tension from families or others.
I think my parents did to a degree… I haven’t received any overt comments re my own relationship but definitely some questionable ones.
As you said you were brought up in similar cultures so maybe less to discuss there.
Maybe interracial is an Americanism, I don’t know.
Alex030222@reddit
Maybe my example wasn’t the best.
I found your statements a bit… hence my initial comment on interracial not always being a verbal comment but sometimes an acknowledgement of two people of different races being together - call that what you want lol. To me that’s thinking the term interracial (or a synonym for interracial). I don’t think we’d be hard pressed to find that.
I think we have had different experiences. That’s not to say the U.K. isn’t tolerant, having grown up in many places I definitely think it is. I just wouldn’t go so far as to say people don’t think in those terms. I really don’t know why we would/how we could think that people wouldn’t notice interracial relationships, and notice them as being interracial.
Romana_Jane@reddit
I'm 58 and have degrees in politics and sociology and even did sociology papers in the 1990s on mixed race couples and never even heard the word interracial until the last 10-25 years from the internets from Americans!
It's never been a phrase in British English. I can think of pre 1950s words for mixed race children, which are deeply offensive, but nothing for the couple itself. There's a 300+ year history of working class mixed race marriages in the UK, at times encouraged by the aristocracy or bourgeois (in the late 1700s, same time as the slave owners were establishing themselves in the new USA). We just do not have the same cultural history as the US at all. Classism, however, is still toxic, and a mixed class relationship will raise eyebrows.
arcticpoppy@reddit
Honest question: wasn’t Harry marrying Megan kind of an issue with respect to race? I’m not a Royal watcher but I feel like I heard a lot about it at the time.
Rob1965@reddit
It only seemed to be a problem for some right wing newspapers.
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
Not generally speaking; more that there was gossip that a specific member of the royal family had made some remarks along those lines.
spockssister08@reddit
54 year old here, more likely nobody under 75 thinks in those terms.
geyeetet@reddit
I used to work in a care home with 90 year olds and I'd never heard any of them make any mention of it when interracial couples came up. They might make a slightly racist comment, typically out of ignorance (I find a lot of them just HAVE to comment on (e.g) the fact that a black man is a doctor, for some reason) but they were unbothered by couples of different races.
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
Yeah, probably a fair adjustment to the age range there.
Prestigious-Garbage5@reddit
Sorry, I'm in my 70's and I would go as fast as to say nobody, no matter their age, would say "inter racial". In the UK, the term (if you really have to use it) is mixed race. And for the record, who cares what colour your skin is.
Maximum_Scientist_85@reddit
Was going to say, my dad’s in his 70s and I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone in his friend group even so much as hint of “interracial couple” being a thing. It’s quite outdated, again only going off his friend group and my parents-in-law but even older folk in pretty remote, introverted villages in Wales aren’t bothered in my experience.
Hell, they had a trans person move to the village a few months back and within a couple of weeks the council - made up almost exclusively of over 70s - had got a trans pride flag up in pride of place in the main square.
PsychologicalAd4430@reddit
I’m 28 and I do. Makes my blood boil. Since prehistoric times if man of another tribe is taking a woman of your tribe that means you’re being conquered. It’s ingrained. End of.
TryToBeKindEh@reddit
I've heard people use the term "interracial couple" in the UK.
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
The term is of course understood but I would venture that very few people in modern Britain think in those terms.
TryToBeKindEh@reddit
I think I would but only as a factual descriptor, rather than with any judgment attached.
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
I think you would be considered unusual for doing so.
moriemur@reddit
I’m in an interracial couple and would describe it that way. It’s just factual?
TryToBeKindEh@reddit
I don't. Outside of urban areas this country is still pretty unused to racial diversity.
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
I think age and other factors play into it too. I have family who live in a very remote part of Scotland and from the time I have spent there, I think general culture has penetrated enough that describing couples as interracial isn't much of thing there either. Obviously other areas may vary.
TryToBeKindEh@reddit
I mean, it's not a term I'd use unless it was somehow relevant to the conversation.
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
I suppose I just can't conceive of many situations where it is relevant.
TryToBeKindEh@reddit
If one were talking about the discrimination or particular experiences faced by interracial couples, either now or in the past. I don't see why it's in any way wrong to have a neutral term for those couples.
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
I guess I'm lucky enough that it never seems relevant.
By the way, I'm not having a dig at you and agree that it is essentially a neutral expression. It is simply bizarre to me that it ever crops up is all.
TryToBeKindEh@reddit
Unfortunately, race exists as a construct and likely will for a long time. But thanks for clarifying the lack of judgement.
worstcurrywurst@reddit
In Northern Ireland a "mixed marriage" is one between Catholic and Protestant 😂
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
Yeah and that isn't the only example where there are differences in background that are culturally and socially relevant but religion is going to be much more common than race.
DrHydeous@reddit
It's the sort of thing my grandparents might have said. For reference, they'd all be around 110 years old now if they were still alive.
redseaaquamarine@reddit
But in their day (mine would also be that age), people gasped at my grandmother marrying a European!!!
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
This. I'd say my grandparents would have said it, parents might think it but not say it and my generation don't even really think about it much.
ToothDoctor24@reddit
I assumed couples discuss it between themselves though?
CoffeeandaTwix@reddit
Maybe some do, but certainly in my personal situation, there is very little cultural difference between us to discuss. We both have different immigrant backgrounds in our families but were both brought up in mainstream modern British culture. I think it fair to say that neither of us talks or thinks much about our blackness or whiteness. The main difference is gender and that is much more of a social and cultural difference than skin colour, at least in our case.
West-Cabinet-2169@reddit
Hello there.
The UK is quite multicultural and mixed up. It's great! There are lots and lots of mixed race couples here in the UK - step into any West London high school and you'll see a kaladeiscope of kids from lots of different nationalities.
How they are viewed? Well, quite positively in the media and general society. You'll see Tesco (supermarket) or IKEA ads with mixed race families.
How do the parents of mixed race couples deal with this? Well... not all families are as broad minded, and no doubt many mixed race couples have uncomfortable moments with each other's families. But I know many British-Carribbean or British-African couples, have met white British- British- Asian couples (Asian - Indian here) and so on.
Bloody-smashing@reddit
Never noticed an issue. I’m Pakistani, husband is white and we have two kids. Barely get a glance tbh
Own-Plankton-6245@reddit
I think that's the point they are making, in America you would get people looking ans judging you, where as here in the UK no body gives it a thought, which is funny as Americans actually view the UK as racist.
America is the most racist country in the world, and they make a huge deal out of race for everything. They deliberately segregate themselves and believe they are doing the right thing. Black only political groups, Latino only political groups, they segregate by race, religion, politics, wealth, education, in fact pretty much anything they can.
In Britain, we are all British. However, in America, they have to label and segregate everything. You are African American, Irish American, Chinese American, and nobody want to be just American.
person_1234@reddit
America is nowhere near the most racist country in the world. You must have a seriously simplistic world view to think they’re even close
PigeonBod@reddit
Race is what class is to the UK. They are certainly significantly more racist as a nation than we are. We are probably more classist.
charg1nmalaz0r@reddit
Yes the US is a lot more racist than the UK but in the grand scheme of things globally no they arent the most racist country in the world.
person_1234@reddit
Off the top of my head - Russia, China, Finland, Japan, India, developed nations that ethnic minorities would have a much worse time in. America is one of the most ethnically diverse countries in the world, of course racism is much more evident there than other countries. How many minority ethnic CEOs are there in other countries? Political leaders?
Own-Plankton-6245@reddit
You are ofcourse correct, I should have said openly racist, yes there are a lot worse countries that it is all quiet and accepted.
TheGreekScorpion@reddit
Something something puppy born in a stable something something is it a horse?
pwlife@reddit
I'm Latina my husband is white. The only time we get looks is when we are in very small towns. We've lived on the west coast, in bigger cities in the south and bigger cities in the midwest and people have treated us normal. Little towns tend to get weird about it, except Louisiana (no one there cared like at all).
ImaginaryParrot@reddit
Same, no one really cares about though I tend to get a bit more random racial abuse than he does which is frustrating!
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
I’m Nepali with a white husband. Any time we go out to eat spicy food, they always assume it’s for me haha. He can handle way more spice than I can
HerrFerret@reddit
Haha. I went out with all my workmates, who are from Pakistan. I used to live in Nepal and can handle some spice, so I ordered a very spicy curry. Wouldn't they be impressed, I thought?
They all looked at me, laughed and ordered egg and chips :D I looked like a right twat.
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
Oh nice! Whereabouts did you live? I was shorn and raised here but go back when I can.
And you know, I sort of relate here. When I’m at work, I tend to stick to really typical lunches and prefer sandwiches, jacket potatoes, etc. Whereas my English colleagues are way more adventurous and they’re the ones eating things like curry for lunch
HerrFerret@reddit
I lived in Lalitpur. I was there during the unfortunate business with the King and the Royal Family, and well that certainly was some 'interesting times'.
I still miss the Dhal Bhat, you just don't get that in the UK.
Visible_Compote9193@reddit
I'm white and my partner is Pakistani.
One time I ordered something spicy and the waiter turned to him and asked him if I was sure 😂 stuff like that happens surprisingly often.
PsychologicalAd4430@reddit
Why don’t you go and live in Pakistan then. If you love them, you can live like them. You’ve forfeited your right to the White mans world
mortstheonlyboyineed@reddit
I know plenty of Pakistani girls/women who were disowned or at the very least got grief from their families due to dating outside of their race. Saying that I know plenty of Greek, Italian, Arabic, Asian, Indian, etc. women who also had massive issues, again mostly from their own friends and families, for dating outside of their race too. Plus, there are plenty of those who've had no issues at all!
However, I do wonder if a lot of it is more about control over the sisters and daughters than actual racism though because the men get a lot less negativity. It's less in the last decade, but the years prior, it was almost expected to face pushback from the local communities. I actually found it worse in the larger cities over the smaller town, too.
The_only_F@reddit
I would expect that to get a lot more stairs than Pakistani husband and White wife. Pakistani wife and White husband is a very rare combo.
Bloody-smashing@reddit
Some places we do (Asian majority places). Not always though, it has become more common with my generation.
In my family none of the males are married to white women, it’s all women who married to white men. There’s myself and four other of my female cousins who are married to white men. My parents generation though it was unheard of for a woman to be married to a white man.
doyathinkasaurus@reddit
All my Asian female friends have white husbands, same with all my black female friends
Bloody-smashing@reddit
Love to see it. Breaking away from the repression our mothers suffered from. (Mine got forced, sorry heavily persuaded to marry my dad and also wasn’t allowed to go to university).
woodzopwns@reddit
White guy with interracial girlfriend is what most people are assuming here, you will still get abuse as a non white man with a British girlfriend, far less than America and it's far more accepted, but people tend to view foreign men far less favourably than foreign women. As a white man in an interracial relationship we've received no hate, our friends who are not white who have white girlfriends, can't say the same.
Mop_Jockey@reddit
Most people don't care, they're also not as common outside of the cities.
SeePerspectives@reddit
I dunno, I live in the rural midlands and it’s pretty normal here too. Nobody bats an eye tbh.
If anything was going to cause gossip in terms of couples, it’s probably going to be class related, and even then it’s just the middle classes gossiping about the middle classes.
Rich people and working class people don’t really care who they end up with, but for some reason the middle class people never seem to just be happy for people.
Middle class dating working class = “slumming it” Middle class dating middle class = “settling” Middle class dating upper class = “punching above their weight”
It’s weird!
baldeagle1991@reddit
I'm not too sure about that.
I lived in the rural East Midlands and it caused enough gossip when an Indian family moved to the village.
At one pub one guys nickname is literally black Ben, and at another a black guy walked in and he was the first seen in there for years, so everyone just stared at him when he first walked in.
Another example was a guy in his 40's saying he would be mortified if his daughter ever dated a black guy, with another being ribbed because his daughter married a black man. Their natural conclusion was the only reason that she would marry him, was that being black, he must have a massive dick.
And this isn't even in the buttfuck middle of nowhere. It's only around 15-20 minutes away from Nottingham and Leicester.
richardjohn@reddit
Upper class is aristocracy
SeePerspectives@reddit
No, upper class is a financial descriptor.
The Aristocracy are called “the noble class” and it has nothing to do with finances. It’s based on hereditary or lifetime titles and peerages. Someone who has a title could lose all their money and they’d still be part of the noble class.
Ciaoshops15@reddit
Yup same, live in the sticks in the north of England and honestly no one would bat an eyelid here either
Skinnybet@reddit
Small town in the midlands. It’s not something I’ve ever heard anyone comment on. Unless you’re a racist I’m sure nobody would notice much. I don’t know any racists so I’m only guessing.
ElizabethHiems@reddit
I’ve lived in the Midlands for a few years now. I think it’s been normal here longer than most places in the UK. I mean you see mixed race grannies everywhere.
forfar4@reddit
My mother remembers seeing the first black guy crossing the road in (ironically) the Black Country in a town called Whiteheath. It was in the early 1950s. Traffic stopped and pedestrians just stared, having never seen a black person before.
Master_Bumblebee680@reddit
I live in the countryside and it has only been common very recently, like the past 5/6 years, before then it was uncommon and much before was rare. But it is common now I would say but this must vary from one place to the other
Accurate_Prompt_8800@reddit
Agree. I’ve been in the mostly and never had anyone ask about it or even look at us twice. Based in London, for reference.
Mop_Jockey@reddit
I'm in rural Scotland, I'd say it's not something people would have an issue with or even find unusual. But Scotland is like 97% white so it is far less common outside of the cities here.
DanielReddit26@reddit
I'll have you know I identify as peely wally.
Hamdown1@reddit
I don't know why but this really made me laugh
Mop_Jockey@reddit
I identify as a honkin jobbie
Silver-Appointment77@reddit
I identify as a cat. So I can sleep all day and swear at people and they;ll still love me :P
ReliefZealousideal84@reddit
Englishman here. What’s a honkin jobbie lol.
ieya404@reddit
Think along the lines of "unpleasant turd".
Goobernauts_are_go@reddit
As opposed to a pleasant one?
ieya404@reddit
Some are definitely worse than others!
Mop_Jockey@reddit
A stinking shite.
ReliefZealousideal84@reddit
Thanks I hate it 👍
ReliefZealousideal84@reddit
Thanks I hate it 👍
Maleficent_Entry2584@reddit
One of my wife's elderly relatives (from Edinburgh) once asked me about our 'mixed marriage'.
I was bemused until my wife pointed out she meant Catholic and Protestant.
That was weird.
Mop_Jockey@reddit
Aye that's still a bit of a thing, I'd say mostly just due to the separate schools and social circles though but some people get a bit weird over it.
forfar4@reddit
Thirty-five years ago, I was dating a Chinese girl from Hong Kong and the only vaguely racist thing that happened was when my mad mother asked her, "Do you drink tea? All Chinese do, don't they... Er... You?"
kickassjay@reddit
Only not as common as them smaller towns tend to be majority white, nothing else
Mop_Jockey@reddit
Well, yes.
charg1nmalaz0r@reddit
I cant speak for everyone in the uk but i dont think any of us really care about inter-racial couples. The whole race thing seems to be a big thing in america, not so much here. Now obviously there will be outliers to this rule but i would say quite confidently it is not the norm.
screwfusdufusrufus@reddit
We like to swim in the deep end of the gene pool
No-Paramedic4236@reddit
Inter what? We just see couples matey.
baldeagle1991@reddit
It's only really looked down upon within the non-white races.
I've known many Arab, Palisfani, Indian, Chinese and Black communities on the UK often look down on it.
It also depends on the specific combination of gender and races. Black women who date white men for example still sometimes get funny looks.
That said interracial relationships are accepted by the vast majority of people.
janus1979@reddit
No one cares.
GoldenFooot@reddit
It wouldn't be considered unusual. If there is push-back it is more likely to be from whatever specific non-white community. I've been with my wife for more then 20yrs. She is Indian, I'm Irish. No real experience of racism or prejudice. A few odd looks from Asian men, but nothing serious. My wife would say she has never experienced racism in the UK from school, onwards. My kids are mid-teens. They are mixed race Indian names. My impression is that their peers are effectively colourblind, they have never been asked about their Indian background - even in a non offensive curious way, their frienda seem oblivious.
Simple_Win_88@reddit
I've honestly never stopped to consider how I feel about interracial couples. Was trying to think of who I know in an interracial couple and remembered my own parents are an interracial couple, and my sibling is also in an interracial couple. It's never even occurred to me as a thing to be honest and I think if I used the phrase out loud my family would look at me like I had three heads.
Worried_Shoulder_634@reddit
I think u underestimate how judgmental Americans are. Most other countries don’t care
Blaggermuffin@reddit
I'm from Manchester and only heard about the differences between people because of where there grandparents where from . From my racist dad. I have black and Catholic cousins . My Dad's parents where Northern Irish Protestants and my Dad always said I can marry anyone as long as she has blue eyes and isn't Catholic . Both me and my sister when we moved out had black partners . I quickly realised it's no different . A friend told me how her and her white Fella got funny looks when on holiday in the States. It's not a silly question. I get annoyed in YouTube comments because if there are none white people in the video most of the comments are racist . We are family and all humanity started in Africa
Thank you
Inside_Sentence_6116@reddit
Tbh with you, we don’t give a shit about owt
evelynnie_@reddit
I’m mixed race and my bf is white. I don’t think anyone really looks at us weirdly tbh
togtogtog@reddit
The only information I could find was from 2011, when 9% of people in couples in England and Wales were in an inter-ethnic relationship. I would imagine that is higher now.
I don't think most people really care. I think it varies by age, and where you are in the country. In London, more than 50% of people aren't from the UK in the first place, so it is very normal for things to be mixed, but in rural areas it is probably less mixed.
I haven't heard the term 'mixed marriage' since the 1980s.
WrongAssumption@reddit
\~20% of married couples in the United States are interracial. Makes me think that the OP has no idea what they are talking about.
SketchesOfSilence@reddit
Racial demographics also play a part. The US has many more non-white people so they may have a lower proportion of mixed race couples to non-white people. Plus, like here, it will vary across the country and with it being so much bigger, individual experience is probably more distinct from person to person.
karaluuebru@reddit
the last time I heard mixed marriage it was in reference to a Protestant marrying a catholic in the Northern Irish part of the family
Friendly-Place2497@reddit
Even in the US “mixed marriage” is a term for people of different religious denominations, we say interracial marriage if it’s a racial difference
togtogtog@reddit
Yeah - I went to Northern Ireland in the 1980s and was really shocked to hear them talking about 'mixed marriages' there with regards to religion!
tauriwoman@reddit
It’s sad to me that this question is even asked. They’re just couples.
calen_moon@reddit
no one really cares, (in a good way) barely anyone judges or even pays attention to it as far as i am aware
myabee3@reddit
I think it depends what part of Uk. I’m from London it’s very multi cultural, my DD however moved away for Uni last month and mentioned her new flatmate (not sure where from) said he had never had the opportunity to speak to a black person previously.
BooRaccoon@reddit
Interracial marriage has never been illegal in the entire history of the UK
auntie_eggma@reddit
We like to couple up with people like us, too.
But people like me are not people with the same skin colour. People like me are the people who think like I do, who value what i value, and whom i get on with. Race is utterly irrelevant to that.
My partner is Indian/British. I'm Italian. It's barely even a thing we think about most of the time. Not because we aren't interested in each other's cultures, but because we are individuals with individual personalities, not just stereotypical representatives of our respective cultures. They're part of the landscape but largely irrelevant to our compatibility.
Melodic-Tutor-2172@reddit
I just view them as a couple whether they are different colours, religions or same sex etc. We are all one race, the human race and the amount of pigment in our skin is inconsequential to me. I don’t look at a couple and think about their differences I just think ‘there’s a couple’.
Moneyquest15@reddit
I think it's changing but I was always chocked at the lack of interracial couples in American TV shoes, black characters being coupled only with black characters.
Proof-Radio8167@reddit
Most people couldn’t care less. It would be more the Muslim communities if anyone frowning on interracial relationships than white or black people
People are just people who cares, everyone deserves companionship
kylehyde84@reddit
They're just a couple aren't they? I have no views other than it's none of my business
wildOldcheesecake@reddit
I don’t like this question. Almost encouraging people to question it. Even saying “interracial” doesn’t sit well with me; there is no need to label it. It’s a relationship end of.
brokenlandmine@reddit
Literally this.
Couples are just couples to me. I never even think to label it by the individuals "race" seems so wildly outdated.
marquis_de_ersatz@reddit
Interracial sounds like.. well, a porn category.
ChelloRam@reddit
That's the key point. Race is only an issue while people make it an issue. The sooner everyone lets go....
Prior_Caterpillar686@reddit
I know you don’t mean this, but at the same time you can’t have decades of reminding black peoples how much race matters and then suddenly tell them not to talk about it or how it suddenly doesn’t matter etc
LowerPick7038@reddit
What's this In reference to?
Prior_Caterpillar686@reddit
Just that as a white person I don’t have to think about race much if at all when it comes to myself so it would be easy to not think about. I’m rarely reminded that I’m white and that it’s intrinsic to my identity somehow.
Where as from from my learning and experience with family and friends, black people are reminded on a much more regular basis that they’re black. Not so much these days maybe, but very much so until recent times
Far-Hope-6186@reddit
No, it is an issue all races used.
Alex030222@reddit
I just see it as a rhetorical question tbf but I agree it shouldn’t be questioned! As a child from an interracial marriage, and currently in an interracial marriage, I’m personally not bothered by the interracial label - I don’t think people use it left, right and centre anyway - mostly in relation to actually discussing the nuances of being in a relationship with someone of a different race… and those nuances definitely exist and are worth discussing!
forfar4@reddit
Might as well use the term "intergalactic" for all the value the terminology brings.
CongealedBeanKingdom@reddit
Planetary
reallynotbatman@reddit
Planetary
SecondaryCemetery@reddit
Intergalactic
tradandtea123@reddit
I've never heard anyone in the UK describe a couple as inter racial, it would be such a weird thing to say.
Worried-Penalty8744@reddit
Interracial is very 2000s porn category really isn’t it
I’ve never ever heard of it being used in real life
Educational-Farmer28@reddit
Was going to add my own comment but as soon as I saw this I didn’t bother to. You said everything I had to say and way more eloquently than I could have said it, and also took the time for an edit. Kudos to you.
Thrasy3@reddit
It’s a weird thing to just ask about. It’s probably not the same as the US at all - a bit like we had a non-white PM without much incident or comment, compared to the US.
A weird thing I’ve always gone through in workplaces is people eventually asking if I’m religious (usually a weird question in the UK - or at least England) when they see me eating a BLT or something, and I have to explain I’m not religious.
Only when they realise my wife doesn’t have an ethnic name like mine, they will also ask her religion. And then they will specifically ask if she’s English.
But that’s about it in the end.
The only time I even suspect it was an issue, was a drunk guy who seemed to be going to “intervene” when I randomly ran into my wife outside a pub. I only suspect that because as he approached us he went from looking a bit stern, to confused, then he stumbled over his words a bit, then gave a rambling speech how “this [hand gestures] is really great… you look really great together, I really like this, it’s really great” and engaged us in awkward but friendly conversation.
Lozt_at_sea@reddit
As a British woman with an African man, together over a decade with two kids. You get the odd white men interested in me getting annoyed that I'm with a black man, black women interested in him getting annoyed that he's with a white woman or black men thinking that I must be interested in them because my partners black, white women thinking that he must be interested in them because his partners white. Racism isn't common, but it does happen by some idiot junkie or some kids in school once every blue moon. Other than those things, we are very well known and liked by the majority of people we meet. The majority of British people don't really care and are just happy to make friends from different places.
Virtual-Guitar-9814@reddit
Interesting point to add, every tv advert now in the UK will feature a mixed race family at every opportunity. I get it that brands do research and want to appeal to certain groups who researchers told them arent interested in their brand, but it feels like an unnatural knee jerk reaction/a fad.
It annoys me cause it misinforms the nation who do nothing but watch tv all day what their countries demographic is and that could cause resentment against something
Bangersandmash96@reddit
Don't think anyone gives a fuck tbh
beerforbears@reddit
Usually on the computer like
warfiers@reddit
Depends. I'm white, and my wife is from Mauritius. Her family is muslim, they don't agree and none of them came to the wedding. We get looked at and hear whispers of "Gori" from asian people passing in the street. When we go to say green street in London or the pakistani area of Birmingham where we have friends, I 100% get treated differently. But we have never had a problem with white people.
Ok_Public_2094@reddit
Overwhelming majority wouldn’t bat an eye but in some areas a mixed couple might get some looks. For example I’m an East African girl from London and I was out with a posh white guy and we were getting quite some stares from people in Islington in London. Mainly from people from my demographic (other African men mainly).
sssuedehead@reddit
Literally nobody cares here. They aren’t viewed in any way at all, nobody would bat an eye lid. (How it should be)
presterjohn7171@reddit
It's generally not a big deal even less so if you are educated and well spoken
TheGreekScorpion@reddit
No one really cares except racists.
And the people who care the most will likely be of the same ethnicity as someone in the relationship - and they'll be the ones giving abuse to that person.
RoHo-UK@reddit
Generally nobody really cares, it's pretty unremarkable in the UK, even in relatively small towns.
The only caveat is that I'd say 'less common' pairings may occasionally get comments, but not really negative, more just noting the rarity of it. A good friend is of Chinese descent, his previous partner was a black Nigerian girl and that generated some curiosity.
Tiny_Megalodon6368@reddit
Hardly anyone cares. In fact a lot of people positively like it because it means immigrants are actively integrating and joining our tribe rather than living parallel but separately from us.
willyd125@reddit
Because we don't care what colour your skin is. We just run a no dickhead policy.
Mrtwisty76@reddit
Dunno if it’s still true, but it’s said that at one point in the 90’s or early 00’s, Derby had the highest percentage of mixed marriages in the country. My (racist, but in an English way) grandad gave away the first black lady to be married in the city in the very early 60’s. Her parents were in the Caribbean, and he was proud to do it. She went to his funeral in the 80’s and my grans in the 90’s. Really lovely lady, with some really nice things to say about my forebears.
FreedUp2380@reddit
Big city - no one cares Small city - maybe some glances
If it's an uncommon combination (let's be honest - some combinations are more common than others) - maybe a couple of glances
I will say that some religious communities have a strict preference for members of the same religion.
duluoz1@reddit
We’re not as obsessed with race as the US
SequimSam@reddit
Meghan would like a word
lexx-ray@reddit
I'm from the UK, but I studied for a semester in Tennessee. I'm white and my boyfriend at the time was black. When j finished my semester he came out and we drove route 66. Everywhere, and I mean everywhere we went, people stared, we got told places were closed (when they clearly weren't) and told some places weren't for "people like us". It was insane. My boyfriend had family in LA and once we got there it was better, but his uncle told me "people here will view your relationship as a fetish". The whole thing was utterly surreal. Never experienced anything like it in the UK, but the US was so blatant about not only being racist towards my boyfriend, but discriminating against us both because we were a mixed race couple. This was 15 years ago, so I'd hope it was a lot better now!
lawtsuda@reddit
This is pretty anecdotal evidence here, but I think it’s just pretty normal? My half brother is black (different fathers), had a kid with his girlfriend about 2 years ago now, she’s white. I can’t speak to their personal experience obviously but we have never treated them differently & everyone loves their kid. I know we’re family but it’s truly something I don’t even think about. But my aunt is also black so I don’t know, maybe I’m just used to it, it might be different for those raised in white only families. And it does also depend on where you live. Cities tend to be more multicultural so will obviously be more normalised there compared to small, mostly white towns. However I also live in a pretty small, mostly white town, and I still feel like people don’t care lol, so idk.
lawtsuda@reddit
Like i just mentioned my aunt is black but it totally skipped my mind she’s technically in an “interracial relationship” because my uncle is white. It’s just pretty normal to me tbh (I don’t mean this in a “i don’t see colour” way btw lol)
Shyymx@reddit
I understand why you're asking, where I come from we still see race and backgrounds and whatnot...i was so surprised when my boyfriend's family didn't even question it all they saw is their son is dating someone and they were happy about it lol. couldn't care less about other things
r_o_k@reddit
I am white and my partner is mixed race (African and English) and although no one says anything to us I do notice occasional looks. These looks are however from people whose opinion I couldn’t care less about.
Rob1234567891011@reddit
Most brits don’t care 😂
Agadoom@reddit
If a British person is giving you shit for it, I personally give you permission to hit them square in the face.
edithmo@reddit
My celeb crush is British so is he down with the swirl? Sorry but it’s been a shite day for an American.
eunuch-horn-dust@reddit
Almost every adult in my close family is in a relationship with someone from a visibly different race to them, including my siblings, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins etc. We live in London so it’s never really been an issue and there’s a lot of diversity.
Celtic-Brit@reddit
I think the majority of people understand that everyone is attracted to different people. It is pretty normal to see interracial couples.I think that the only time people would notice or say something is if there was an argument or the situation was abusive. But abuse happens in all ethnicities and genders.
Turquoise__Dragon@reddit
Nobody cares.
rubba_tt@reddit
We generally don't care. There are racist people that do
Familiar_Remote_9127@reddit
It depends on the ethnic makeup of the couple and depends on which side you are talking about. It's a complicated issue and people saying there are no issues are being very naive. I say this as someone who has spent most of the last 20 years in interracial relationships and is from an extremely mixed family (multi generational mixing of various ethnicities). People are projected their personal feelings on interracial couples in response but this is reddit where most are anti racist, the reality is somewhat different.
nobodyputsbabyinthe@reddit
Exactly this.
1fingersalute@reddit
This. I've never seen any issues when my black friends were going out with white girls (or vice versa) but when I went out with a black girl we got plenty of comments, mainly from black people. I did live in a mainly ethnic area so that probably contributes but the men didn't seem happy I'd "stolen" one of their girls in their eyes lol this was 20 years ago though and times have definitely changed quite a bit
Hank_Wankplank@reddit
Was going to say something similar. The vast majority of people don't seem to care but the only overt hostility I've seen is from black men in London.
I haven't been in an interracial relationship but I had a mixed race female friend in London that I used to visit, and me being male when we walked around together people assumed we were a couple. We had black guys kissing their teeth at us, muttering stuff under their breath, even spitting in our direction whilst staring daggers at us. From what I could tell they generally seemed to be non British born from their accents.
This was probably aroun 8-9 years ago.
chartupdate@reddit
It still exists. I (male) have a black female other half. I don't encounter direct hostility but we get glowered at in the street by black men who clearly object to me being out of my lane 😁
Few-Station8831@reddit
Similar view to what you have described
Once you get into the borderland of religion and pockets of xenophobic communities you’ll find plenty of issues.
If we’re talking about our OP a girl with African heritage discussing a relationship with her theoretical “English Hot boi” in the office at work it wouldn’t really register as a thing in the U.K.
Not so much if you transfer this same conversation over to US they are super fucked up on division bracketed by Race and Religion and it’s only getting worse.
Edify7@reddit
A possibly uncomfortable truth for some is that in this instance, the more overt racism can come from individuals that are part of ethnic minority communities, rather than the white on minority racism that first comes to mind.
My own experiences with this would run into the thousands of words, so I won't start. But in the 16 years my wife and I have been together, the vast majority of hostility we have experienced has been from people from her ethnic background, and mostly directed at her.
Proud_Cookie@reddit
No one bats an eyelid.
magammon@reddit
UK culture tends to divide on class, and I expect we are much more divided along those lines.
Ok-Ratio4473@reddit
We love them they are our favourite
Maleficent-Split8267@reddit
Yeah, no one cares. Live and let live.
JGW4lker@reddit
Never had a real problem but around Bradford would sometimes get some Pakistani uncles coming up and being protective/creepy asking for last names and such. Apparently that didn’t happen when she was on her own.
Nelec@reddit
My girlfriend is black. No one cares or ever said anything 🤷♂️
Ultraviolet59@reddit
The only people here who even notice are the racists. Living in London it's strange if you don't know/mingle with/marry people from other backgrounds.
Able-Physics-7153@reddit
The biggest interracial relationship group in the UK is black Men and white woman. That is by far the most likely you will see.
Next is white men and South Asian Woman. It's all very normal.
As some have suggested, the strange looks sometimes seems to come from the actual minority groups themselves.
wildrift91@reddit
I think vast majority of us are already aware that North America is a segregated society and has a problem with racism which is reflected by interracial relationships.
Meanwhile-in-Paris@reddit
I agree, and I imagine most do too. That term “interracial relationships” is awful imo. But look at the fuss when prince Harry married Megan Markle. All the bigots came of the closet to show their outrage.
redseaaquamarine@reddit
I honestly didn't hear any fuss about race with Meghan Markle. She is considered white here anyway, as we go by what colour someone's skin is, not that awful American "one drop rule".
Master_Bumblebee680@reddit
I definitely saw a tonne of racism for Meghan
McRazz@reddit
Except that line never sank in with any of the joe public here in the UK, it was all pretty much fabricated by H&M PR team and some elements of the radical press.
stever71@reddit
That was not about race, she is just very unlikeable and entitled, bitchy etc.
ignatiusjreillyXM@reddit
The fuss was about her being a) American (ultimately probably Californian.is relevant too) b) an actress and minor celebrity c) (as increasingly became apparent) malevolent and full of shit
Longjumping-Moose289@reddit
100%. Would someone from England and Romania be interracial? Considering race includes nationality. Or is the focus on the pigment of skin?
botwewa@reddit
Does race include nationality? First time I’m hearing this.
Longjumping-Moose289@reddit
It is as per the Equality Act 2010
IrishWithoutPotatoes@reddit
For the US, it’s the skin thing. It’s stupid.
botwewa@reddit
When my husband and I went to NYC a random black man called him a ‘stupid white man’ as we walked past. It was the strangest thing ever.
lalabadmans@reddit
Depends on the couple up. I think in America just like the uk, seeing East Asian women with white men is extremely common so no one will bat an eye lid.
But other combos like East Asian men with a black/ white woman might turn some heads or get some comments from ignorant people.
Master_Bumblebee680@reddit
We grew up on Doctor Who, Sarah Jane Adventures, Merlin, The Story of Tracy Beaker, Tracy Beaker Returns, The Dumping Ground, Horrid Henry, Bear Behaving Badly… we’re used to various races inhabiting our TV’s, let alone in our real lives Not to say there isn’t racism, there is, but we’re probably the most chill predominantly white country in Europe when it comes to interracial relationships and different colour skin
Kreia-14536@reddit
No-one gives a shit unless you go to st. Helens or something, which you definitely have no reason to do. My mum's from Grimsby and my dad's ethnically Chinese from Malaysia and I've literally never seen or heard anyone mention anything about that or even give weird looks or anything. In fact, I hadn't ever considered that people may find interracial couples strange until you mentioned it in this post.
Jonkarraa@reddit
Mostly it’s normal. You get some racists that have a problem but it’s not a common reaction these days and it’s rarely overt.
itsonlysmellzz94@reddit
I would say it’s a lot more common now than it was 20 years ago, but even it being more common it doesn’t mean we don’t come across absolute dickheads every now and again. I was in Portsmouth back in 2014 with my then gf (I’m white, she’s black) walking down the street. Out of nowhere this gammy little prick on the otherside of the road shouted at us “why can’t you just date your own race!” Then he ran off. That was the only time in my life someone has been brazen enough to vocalise their issue with it mind you, and I’ve only been in relationships with black women since.
Thunderous71@reddit
The only weird barrier is still down religious lines with some parents of the "old" country and its ways doing nasty stuff to their own kids just because of religion. "Interrace" is so normal its not even considered a thing.
Romana_Jane@reddit
In the 1990s, 20% of births were mixed race (the new east Europeans having children once settled are the ones who lowered this statistic. I think that might show you how it is just part of our society.
It really is quite normalised and accepted and no big deal and people would thing there is a couple, nothing more.
Interracial is not a phrase used in British English either, it never has. Sociologists etc might say mixed or mixed race, but otherwise, it's just a couple.
Here we are about citizenship not some long distance ethnic background too, people of all colours and backgrounds are British if born here/naturalised citizen. We don't do that x-American thing as x-British. Obviously for some reasons, for data gathering, to monitor any potential institutional racism (which is a problem, but one we are trying to tackle and change for the most part - two steps forward, one step back a lot of the time sadly), we collect stats. But again, for most ordinary people, people are people. There are of course, a few toxic racists out there, loud on the internet, passive aggressive and unpleasant in real life.
I first starting dating my husband in 1990, and I have experienced 4 instances of racism from white people in all that time (much more from the British Pakistani community sadly, most stares, tuts, and rude questions). I've had more Islamophobia as a hijabi from white people, especially since 2001, but again, less that 5 incidents, just 2 violent and frightening sadly, than racism when with him. (I've actually experienced far more threatening and violent ableism as a wheelchair user, which maybe says something different about the UK).
UnknownTerrorUK@reddit
Where I live no-one would notice or care, but it's rare to see. Part of me thinks it's rare to see because no-one really cares. We aren't walking down the street analyzing every pairing of people in the first place.
MountainMuffin1980@reddit
There's a lot of people posting here who have obviously never lived somewhere less metropolitan or diverse.
In most cities and big towns no-one will care. Smaller towns and villages an interracial couple will often get looked at with interest and surprise. And of course there are racist twats in every country in the world, so there will no doubt be dudes whoa t some point or other will say to a white women dating a black dude "why are you with him when you can be with me" or similar.
Largely it's not an issue, especially in places like London, but in less diverse places it will draw looks and potentially comments.
richardjohn@reddit
I'm from a small town in Wales and nobody would give an "interracial" couple a second look... is this a northern thing?
MountainMuffin1980@reddit
I'm only talking from my experiences of it. In the Southern Counties, which are hugely white it would draw looks. In certain places in Scotland, again, hugely white it would draw looks.
That might be all but it would definitely be noticeable if you were observant.
georgiebb@reddit
Funnily enough, I haven't had any trouble from anyone in years until I visited east London with my son a few weeks ago. I do think you are right though and we were just unlucky
Jlst@reddit
I suppose my two best friends are an interracial couple but it’s never really something I’ve considered before. Don’t think anyone cares/noticed - no reason to even think twice over it. Totally normal. The US is just crazy.
Suzilaura@reddit
Nobody gives a shit. Are you happy? Treated well? Good-o. Keep at it.
sporkofsage@reddit
So, when I lived in Birmingham about 10 years ago I had one friend who was white and her husband was also white, and my friend group made fun of them and kept asking if they were racists to piss them off just because they were the only white-on-white relationship in our friend group, and it was a very silly/easy way to wind them up, and it's fun to mildly piss your friends off (we knew they weren't racists and if we had actually upset them we wouldn't have done it).
My in laws were in an interracial relationship in the 80s and apparently...no one really cared? Admittedly, they were both in the medical field (STEM in general is very multicultural in the UK) and in a big cities. It was the 80s so my FIL experienced a "standard" level of racism and my MIL experienced a "standard" level of misogyny; obviously this isn't great, but when I talked to them about if people were horrible to them based on their marriage they said "uhhh...not really, no". Obviously, I imagine that in smaller towns/seaside towns/very countryside areas they might have encountered more animosity, but that wasn't their experience of the north west of England, Essex (which can surprise people), or Scotland (but again, Glasgow, not a rural area).
ickleb@reddit
It’s totally normal, back to you. Why do Americans make such a massive deal about it?
W0rmh0leXtreme@reddit
Usually in Britain we find the American obsession with race and/or skin colour to be strange. Even just the fact that you feel you have to keep mentioning people's skin colour and have to refer to people by it is alien to us. While there are some people who are exceptions to this, in general we view people based on what sort of person they are personality wise than what colour their skin is. Being an arsehole isn't restricted to any particular race after all.
Mobile_Entrance_1967@reddit
Class plays a bigger (subconscious) part here. Brits tend to gravitate more towards ethnic minorities of their own class than towards fellow Brits of a different class.
SildurScamp@reddit
I know a few couples like this and I don’t think they run into much of a problem - but I’m looking at it from the outside so there could be things they go through I’m not aware of.
losingfocus2015@reddit
either myself or my gf get stares, but what are they gonna do about it
nothing, that's what
aden4you123342321323@reddit
Yeah this is a bit of a werid question. We don’t care lol
Soggy_Detective_4737@reddit
It's been maybe 40 years since it was occasionally commented on. Nowadays, it's just something that you can see in most places.
There are still pockets of communities where it's predominantly one ethnicity, so it would be unusual to see an interracial couple, and there are areas that are against interfaith and interracial partnerships.
I'm all for people loving who they love.
Bucketlyy@reddit
Perhaps it's just my area but I'm gonna have to say, from my experience, negatively.
My father is white and my mother black and i'm not allowed to see my father's side of the family because they're deeply racist. as a child i had my own grandfather call me and my mother a darkie.
MordecaiGoldBird@reddit
Literally no one cares
Fragile_reddit_mods@reddit
Nobody cares. Truly. Very very few people in the UK care
JaeAnne01@reddit
I live in Northern Ireland and wouldn’t generally be an issue here as far as iam aware. Plenty of “mixed couples” here. Some people here are a bit bitter with “foreigners taking jobs” but that is a sweeping generalisation.
ChelseaMourning@reddit
White female with an Asian partner here. He’s from Hong Kong and yes, we do get looks - usually from Asian women. Apart from that, nobody cares and we just go about our business.
Silverdodger@reddit
No one cares in the UK
KiwiOk5084@reddit
I don’t notice colour in any way. I have never understood the disgusting treatment people receive for the colour of their skin.
Academic_Vanilla_736@reddit
My Nanna (would be 192 this year if she was still with us) nearly fell off her perch 25 years ago, when I, white, rocked up with a mixed race boy to a family party. Everyone over the current age of 70 would probably make a comment. Between 55 & 69 y/o, I'd probably get side eyed, 54 y/o and under, nobody cares. This is Liverpool though. We're 95% Irish immigrants ourselves, with a varied culture, lovely mix of races & a whole host of accents to be heard. You'll get the odd idiot passing comment, but truly, in my experience, nobody's actually bothered who you date/marry as long as they're not a psychopath.
Soldarumi@reddit
It's pretty normal in cities and larger towns. As a nation, it's pretty normal. However, in some more rural areas, there just aren't people of different races. My daughter's primary class (60 kids) had ONE black kid, everyone else is white. They get super uncomfortable trying to describe him (oh you know, Ethan, the boy with black hair and dark eyes) which is funny to watch.
But yeah, on the whole it is pretty normal.
If anything, it is the non whites that want to preserve their own culture and stop their kids dating white partners. Personally, I had a sikh Indian girlfriend, which my mother was fine with. However, my GFs father told me he'd cut my head off and bury me if I didn't stop going out with his daughter. So sometimes it isn't just the whites that are dicks.
Electrical-Horse-698@reddit
I find this a bit weird wouldn't occur to me to question it or consider it a topic. I think the term interracial is weird ... Never quite understood why yanks use the term "African American" as well, sounds like another term to segregate people... They are American like everyone else. (My turn to maybe ask an ignorant question sorry)
Some-Ad-3938@reddit
No one cares. Just your weirdo country that has issues.
Rykka@reddit
I feel like Americans are obsessed with labeling themselves or being part of a group. Would never bat an eyelid to this.
quoole@reddit
America still has problems for sure, but recently we (an interracial couple) traveled across Ohio, Pennsylvania and NY and there wasn't really anything that either of us classed as racism - no weird comments, no funny looks and we even visited some very rural parts of Ohio. We didn't talk to any police or anything like that though!
It was fairly obvious that we were British, just from accents, and so I am sure that helped a bit but still - one guy we talked to thought that we spoke French in England - but we were both a little worried before we left and America did ok.
SwordTaster@reddit
Those are all much more tolerant states. Go a bit further south, you get looks. Hell, even in the less touristy parts of florida, you get looks.
quoole@reddit
Oh I absolutely know America has its problems, and I am aware we were in the North but just wanted to add a little bit of positivity for the US for a change
whosafeard@reddit
In Florida, the more north you go the more south you are
SwordTaster@reddit
I know. I was thinking of the edges of Orlando and Lakeland
Simple-Passion-5919@reddit
Well you travelled in America for presumably a week or two, and encountered no racism. I've lived in this country for 32 years and only seen it 2 or 3 times.
BaconCheeseZombie@reddit
Quoi?
Medical_Band_1556@reddit
I don't think that's very fair to the US. Try to marry a Korean woman as a British man (for example) and see what reaction you get. Every country is insular to some degree.
Friendly-Place2497@reddit
Idk, I haven’t been to UK but France had a much weirder racial/racist vibe than anywhere I’ve been in the US, Paris was much more visibly segregated than anywhere in the US, and my interracial family got a lot of stares.
Mrwebbi@reddit
Well I don't think that is true. My wife and I (black & white) never ever had an issue in almost 20 years in the UK, but certainly have in some of the countries we have travelled in - India, UAE and some former soviet European countries being the worst.
Even in several African countries people barely bat an eyelid.
yojifer680@reddit
It depends where you go in the UK. I've never seen one in real life, but I see them in about 80% of all TV commercials.
Equivalent_Parking_8@reddit
According to TV adverts every couple is either interracial or same sex. So it's just normal.
botwewa@reddit
My husband and I are black and white and I always shout ‘woke’ at these ads (as a joke obv), but A LOT of them do feature a mixed couple, it’s a bit bizarre.
Rob1965@reddit
They’re trying to cover all bases of potential customers with the one couple.
But it does show how normal it is in the UK. Advertisers wouldn’t want to risk something that distracts viewers from their product/service/message.
SnooStrawberries2342@reddit
Turns out adverts can be a force for good after all...
Criticada@reddit
I’m Asian-American living in the U.K. and married to a white man. For me, the bigger the city, the more diverse it is whether in the U.K. or US. I lived in the city in the US and you see loads of interracial couples. Same as the city where I live now in the U.K. But go to a small British town and sometimes I’m the only non-white person out and about which means most couples I see are of same race. Same in the US.
DistributionMost6109@reddit
Vomit
No_Success_4269@reddit
As people have said, pretty common and pretty normal. But just to add my experience to what others have said, I (a mixed heritage “black” man) have had three relationships with white girls of note. With ALL three, members of their family had something to say. Girl 1 - it was the older generation. Fair enough I guess; old, outdated attitudes. Girl 2 - it was her mum who was in her 40s. No real excuse. Her dad wasn’t impressed with his wife’s attitude towards me. Girl 3 - her mum and dad who were in their 50s. No excuse for these POS. Girl 3 was 2009, so pretty recent. And I’m from a pretty diverse area.
So, while interracial relationships are very common (in my circles, extremely common, pretty much the norm), backwards, racist attitudes towards it do exist. For me, I decided to marry someone with the same mix as me so I could bypass all of this BS. Much happier for it.
Scaryarr@reddit
Very normal. Its very diverse, especially in the cities
unfeasiblylargeballs@reddit
Don't care. Except I bet we've got a few racists to prove me wrong. But mostly people don't care
Difficult-Peace-0@reddit
It's not even something that enters your head when you see it, and to be honest, I find the american views on race to be a bit obscene.
incenseguy@reddit
I don’t see that many mixed race couples in the uk. But we don’t care as long as they are happy
aintbrokeDL@reddit
Never been a known issue. I think the only issues I've ever been aware of is some groups, Muslim/Pakistani, Italians, Indian/Hindu, and certain smaller Christian groups who prefer their offspring marry within that group.
Of course there's White British who also behave like this but it's rare and mostly looked down upon by others.
It's very common to see mixed race children in the UK.
ArCKAngel365@reddit
I mean there might be pockets where older generations might have something to say but I think you’d have to go out of your way to find it.
jsf7575@reddit
Mixed couples are pretty common. Lots of couples near me are one United and one City.
jsf7575@reddit
No one gives a shit. Don’t be fooled by the ridiculous portrayal of the UK as a racist hellhole. It’s only the racism industry that wants you to think that.
dommiichan@reddit
there are fourth and fifth generation mixed race people in the UK, and no one bats an eye
Neilwarnocks@reddit
Known simply as "couples" in the UK
annihilation511@reddit
This is so weird to me to be a thing someone would even ask. It feels very 1950's this question.
-mmmusic-@reddit
my parents are an interracial couple, so it's very normal to me. they're both british, one from derby and the other manchester, and they have their disagreements on certain words like my dad (from derby) says cob, and my mum (manchester) says barm cake. like wtf is that. my brother and i grew up in derby, too, so we say cob. she is outnumbered by derby... people? idk what the word would be.
i'd say it's quite normal here. my dad told me that the other week at work, his coworkers found out that his wife is brown and a couple of them seemed surprised because they didn't know, or from the way he talks about her she probably doesn't 'sound asian' because she isn't, really. her parents were from india and pakistan, then they moved here and had her. she grew up in manchester with quite a lot of other asian people, and her best friend until a few years ago was a ginger kid who everyone thought was well weird because her skin was so pale haha!
idk where i'm going with this, really. but just saying that while there is definitely racism in england and it is definitely a problem, it's not as bad as america. i have the privilege of passing as white, so i never saw much racism growing up compared to my mum. life is okay.
Melodic_Ad_3895@reddit
For the most part people don't care unless your a white guy with an Asian (Pakistani, Indian or bangaledeshi) women then there is a big cha ve your life will be on the line. Not always but more likely than in any other scenario.
xthrowawayaccxx@reddit
Genuinely the most normal thing. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone talking about interracial relationships
Excellent-Mango-3977@reddit
My girlfriend is black, myself white. Never really had an issue with it, to be honest. The UK is more accepting than people give us credit for.
Most people don't care enough to make comments or give mucky looks etc, everyone just gets on with their day. I've had comments by friends, but only tongue and cheek, nothing meant to be hurtful.
Rob1965@reddit
As others have said, it’s totally normal here in the UK.
I realised things were different when my wife and I first went to the states: We were just walking along, holding hands, minding our own business (she’s black & I’m white) and a (white) woman randomly says to me as she walks by “you should be ashamed of yourself”.
It first I was confused and didn’t quite understand what had happened. (I even thought maybe she was talking to someone else but just happened to look at me.)
Of course my wife, who has more experience of racism than me, realised straight away that the woman was racist.
It’s certainly not something that would happen in the UK.
One_Fly5200@reddit
Among my friends more people are in some sort of cross-cultural , interracial relationship than not. this might be a self-selecting group but honestly I don’t think anyone cares here. I just don’t know why I would want to limit my dating pool like that.
HoneyMeid@reddit
I am in a mixed-marriage. We are British but now live in the US. We’ve not experienced any negativity either in the UK or in the US. Never had anyone stare at us or treat us differently. In both countries we lived in cities, though.
Kooky_Strategy_8306@reddit
It's so much more common because we don't have cities that are an incredibly large proportion one particular ethnic minority group. Even in London, the borough with the largest black population is Lewisham, but even that is only 27%. Compare this to the US where entire cities have two-thirds+ black populations. When you don't have that same concentration of one particular ethnic group, it's inevitably going to result in more interracial couples, and when that is the case, it becomes normal.
RoohsMama@reddit
Interracial couples are quite common in Europe. There are pockets of intolerance in small towns but nothing overtly biased.
Special-Ad-9415@reddit
I'm in a mixed race relationship, but they are in no way common. Not unless you consider other europeans a different race.
asphytotalxtc@reddit
I grew up in London, and they are the rule rather than the exception...
Special-Ad-9415@reddit
And london isn't european, or even british. Hasn't been for a long time. It's a truly international city. It's the exception, not the rule.
asphytotalxtc@reddit
Honestly can't argue with you... Not even in the slightest. I grew up in the 80s with a Jamaican best friend, heading off to Southall for weekend curry breakfasts as a teenager, my first girlfriend was Jewish and my second Pakistani... Nobody honestly battered an eyelid.
I had such a rich childhood, culturally, it's almost a shame some people don't.
throwaway480848@reddit
I get what the other person is saying but their wording is a bit wrong. London is considered a part of the UK/British like everywhere else, as much as we love to throw shade at Londoners. However cities are more multicultural in general, London moreso than any other place. It is definitely not representative of the UK as a whole.
I'm not playing the victim card, but just talking from personal experience; as a mixed person who is now in their 20s and grew up in a more rural-ish town I did experience racism. Although it has an aging population so at the same time it doesn't surprise me.
Personally nowadays, I almost never experience it. Of course it exists, but if on the rare occasion someone acts that way in 2024 I just dismiss them as a nutcase and go about my day.
kimsala@reddit
Been in several interracial relationship and it's never really been commented on. That's only ever happened in the States to be honest.
Miserable_History238@reddit
An interracial couple involving a black person of Afro Caribbean descent in the UK is very common. Caribbean descended people may even disappear from the uk in future in favour of their interracial kids.
Interracial couples with an Asian person is much less common.
Resiliencemuffin@reddit
As a couple
ItWasTheChuauaha@reddit
The same way as any other couple.
Uvers_@reddit
I disagree UK is way more racist than USA, especially in terms of seeing a brown man with a white woman or another race of woman. It's very common to see a white-man with whoever cause the white man always gets a free pass.
theantsinyourpants@reddit
I dont think anyone will say anything ever. It’s so taboo now to say anything racist even if they’re thinking it. The only way you’ll ever hear anyone’s real views is if they’re extremely close family members or something. Overall though no one cares or questions really
walks2237@reddit
My best friend is in a interracial relationship, everyone is fine with it apart from the woman on the black side of the family, they see him dating a white as a snub to black women
Dadda_Green@reddit
I’m not saying Britain isn’t racist (it can be) but race really isn’t given the same focus as in the States. Class maybe is…
JaMs_buzz@reddit
Nobody cares
Revolutionary_Cow402@reddit
This is so interesting because I have the opposite experience 😅 I grew up in a very diverse suburban area of the Pacific Northwest but now live in a racially homogenous bit of NW England.
Tons of my friends at school had mixed race parents, but where I live now it’s mostly white British people and non-white immigrants who’ve come to the UK with their partners.
I think older people here might think mixed race relationships are a bit unusual but I don’t think it would be an issue like it is in rural (more racist) US communities.
fudgermucker@reddit
I know English and Welsh couple
angemental@reddit
as a black woman in the uk, dating outside my race is actually easier than other black men
ukheather@reddit
No one cares here.
Trick_Barracuda_9895@reddit
Totally normal. You'd have to go to some pretty backwards areas to even get a glance.
I've occasionally seen black guys ask white/pale women "do you date black guys?" or kinda approach from the assumption that they'll be considered exotic, but that's probably a slightly different thing at play.
AnxiousAppointment70@reddit
My family was all white, just English for several centuries but then our daughter married a Nigerian man and they have 3 gorgeous little daughters. Our son has an Indonesian partner. We just see them as our family and love them all. It's pretty normal nowadays in England. Integration is always accepted but what many of us don't like is when people group up and create separate exclusive communities. That makes some people feel uneasy.
nfurnoh@reddit
I don’t know how Brits in general view them, but when I moved over here 22 years ago I was surprised how many I saw and how accepted they were. It’s pretty common, far more so than my native Chicago.
Briarcliff_Manor@reddit
I'm white European and my bf is from South East Asia. People in my city (big city, culturally diverse) no one cares. The only people who actually made some weird comments are some of my bf's friend from his own country who live in the UK. Sooo yeah hope that helps.
Opening_Major9389@reddit
do you mind my asking if you intend on having children?
devster75@reddit
Through binoculars
Agreeable_Air_6865@reddit
They’re mostly viewed on the TV in almost every single advert.
Thevanillafalcon@reddit
It varies. Maybe in rural areas you get more raised eyebrows and comments, but in urban areas no one cares.
It’s also cultural. Think it’s important to say that it’s not just white people who would be upset by people of colour, plenty of traditional minded people of colour may be upset that their younger relatives are dating out of their race.
Rare_Tutor7120@reddit
No one cares. The UK is very diverse.
Opening_Major9389@reddit
too many natives. needs more browns - hindu, voodoo ideology ideally
LaCheindeBasset@reddit
There’s a lot of comments here saying it’s just not a real consideration or issue in the younger generations.
I think that’s perhaps slightly optimistic.
Anecdotally, I have found that negative sentiment towards mixed race relationships to be widely present in the various south asian british communities, and in more upper class circles.
It might not be openly stated or obvious, but that prejudice is very much still present.
DrinkComfortable6332@reddit
probably because the UK is super diverse, and also i remember there being some statistic saying that it was likely that you are 68% likely to marry someone bilingual/not of english decent back in school.
Efficient-Volume6506@reddit
I feel like even if it was looked down upon (idk if it is, I don’t live in the UK) you wouldn’t necessarily get an honest answer from this sub. People obviously want to make their country look good
Sazmoo91@reddit
I'm white British, my partner is British but of Indian descent. I am aware of a verrryyyy small majority of his family hoping he would end up with an Indian girl, but for the most part I have been welcomed into his family and the wider the Indian community with open arms.
I've only had 1 incident of someone being outright rude/racist towards us being in an interracial relationship within the past 5 years we've been together; apart from that incident nobody has treated either of us any differently
Hungry_Conclusion585@reddit
I've been in an interracial relationship (and now marriage) for over 11 years and I have never had a single negative comment or issue.
That said, I am concerned about the rise of right wing populism and authoritarianism in the west and if it will start to normalise racism, and I do read plenty of racism and extreme right wing rhetoric online - some of which come from British people.
Plenty_Suspect_3446@reddit
You won’t get an honest response on Reddit, considering the echo chamber and political biases.
manic_panda@reddit
We have racists here but they're mostly an annoying vocal minority. Most people don't think twice about seeing mixed couples. I've never really understood the double racism in the US with people refusing to date outside the culture. Like dude, it's a melting pot! Melt a little!
Flymo193@reddit
I doubt most people even really notice to be honest
m1bnk@reddit
Nobody cares. Making everything about race is largely still just an American thing
Ok-Assistant-6977@reddit
It's actively promoted in the UK. Every advert on TV is interracial families.
elizathemagician@reddit
People are generally very tolerant and especially more so than in the USA but not always. I’m white and my ex is black, mostly no one gave a shit but when we went to certain suburbs of London we were both subjected to racial slurs. So we knew to avoid those areas! Also fellow white people (in particular men) would ask me some very strange and overly personal questions that you simply should not ask about someone’s partner. After we broke up and I started dating again if I ever expressed interest in someone not black I’d always get the “oh I thought you only dated black guys” comment. Nope I date guys I connect with!
WagnerMatosUK@reddit
I live in a small town in England, I’m South American (brown) and my partner is Eastern European (white) and I can say from my experience people usually either has a positive view or simply couldn’t care less. This is my experience all over Europe, South East Asia and South America.
mandieisperfect@reddit
There’s not many white British left in England
BiteSnap@reddit
Nobody’s arsed here. Maybe in some less diverse small villages people might be curious but on the whole, no issues at all. We are a big old melting pot here
DeeDeeC21@reddit
I’m from a mixed background and born and bred in 90s London. It’s never been something people comment on for me personally as it’s normal to the point of being ordinary and not a topic for conversation (in the city at least!). However, I will say that the only comments I recall directed towards my parents were always from brown people, usually negative and, directed at my brown mother for marrying a white man.
Cute-Extent-11@reddit
Would not bat an eyelid i know it's cliché but I don't think people notice or care.
Distinct-Quantity-46@reddit
It’s so obvious Americans are inherently racist and us brits are constantly accused of it when generally we are the most welcoming non racist country in the world (otherwise why would so many people from different cultures want to come here?) we honestly DONT CARE ONE IOTA of interracial couples, people don’t even mention it, give a second glance or anything,we have far more things we get uppity about in the uk
Rodney_Angles@reddit
Mainly by the naked eye, but sometimes through binoculars and that, I guess.
amifireyet@reddit
This is exactly why importing American political debates and ideas into our country is bloody stupid. Very very few people here would bat an eye-lid or give a shit at an interracial couple.
Admirable-Owl-7002@reddit
I grew up in London in the 90s and early 00s and it was really normal in all the circles I mixed in. And when I say mixed it was a lot of different mixes!
MarmiteX1@reddit
How do you feel now? What's your experience of how people treat you? I'm British Indian (both parents Indian). I've got mixed race (half indian) in my extended family but my family and I never had issue with them, we treated them the same.
Delicious-Cut-7911@reddit
We never had segregation like Americans.
TheJobSquad@reddit
Have you ever heard about The Battle of Bamber Bridge?
During the second world war American troops were stationed in a village called Bamber Bridge, just south of Preston. Some white soldiers tried to establish segregation so they would not have to drink in the same pubs as the black soldiers. The locals obliged by hanging signs reading 'black troops only' in the pubs.
Unfortunately it all goes a bit downhill, but it's good to hear that the locals were on the right side of history.
https://www.historic-uk.com/HistoryUK/HistoryofBritain/Battle-Of-Bamber-Bridge/
JustTheGirlYouSee@reddit
In the UK people don't care about that stuff, unless they're racist. Americans seem to be so interested in people's race that it's just so focussed on all the time. Sad really.
cinematic_novel@reddit
In London they are a completely uneventful occurrence. Elsewhere it might be different, but I doubt it is radically different
floss147@reddit
As someone who was raised in the south, in a city that was very multicultural, my best friend’s family was from Bangladesh and my first crush was darker skinned.
I’ve never dated a black person, but I have to say that I wouldn’t have rejected the right man either. I just happened to fall in love with a white man.
I love how diverse it is where I live. When I went ‘up north’ for uni, I lived in a town that had one Asian family and they were frequently harassed.
You get idiots everywhere but the more diversity, the more tolerance in my experience. I’ve seen less instances of racism where I live now than up north where they didn’t have any real diversity in culture.
ayyungjeezy@reddit
From my experience dating black women and having pale skin, it is a regular occurance to have a dirty look or a strange interaction - particularly from the older generation. In London you should have a better experience (for the most part). The home counties however are full of racists who will look down their noses at you. Sometimes older black people would give my girlfriends bad looks but usually it would be white people giving us bad looks or comments.
The_Dude_Abides316@reddit
Nobody gives a fuck, mate. Just try not to use your outdoor voice when you're inside, and you're grand.
Scarlet-pimpernel@reddit
Try pornhub
Delabane@reddit
I am White English male any my wife is American (Hispanic) and her parents were from Puerto Rico. She moved to the UK 21 years ago and hasn't really had any issues from white people. She has mostly had disapproving looks from Asians, mostly in cities because they incorrectly think she is one. Had some angry looks from some black males some years ago. We often go in the countryside exploring, my wife doe not like most cities, never had any issues.
smickie@reddit
White and married a British Indian bloke, literally has never been an issue is like 15 years, I don't think it's ever been mentioned.
MarmiteX1@reddit
I've had opposite experience, mainly looks from people, they won't say anything though.
PalookaOfAllTrades@reddit
Ours is not a big island, and I think a lot of the immigration of the last 50+ years has made everywhere more interesting. Though, I remember my (white) aunt had a relationship with a black man in the mid 80s and it wasn't quite as tolerated here( in the North West) at that time.
I guess a lot of people suffered through ignorance of others to get us to the point where nobody bats an eyelid at an interatial couple.
Until one mentions being vegan of course.
AirshipHead@reddit
Certainly better than what it will be in America in 2025
wecanplayhouse@reddit
Reading this comment section as a Black British women has been very very interesting. All I’m gonna say is that you’ll get very different responses if you ask in a Black sub. It’s also not weird that you’ve asked this as multiple people have said. They live in a bubble.
hook-happy@reddit
Honestly nobody even notices or cares. Like it literally doesn’t cross anyone’s mind. To the point it’s a surprising question to be asked.
bluelouboyle88@reddit
I love all couples. I love all children
HollyGoLately@reddit
The vast majority of people don’t care. Also most people don’t care what other people think so even if someone does have backwards ideas about it, it’s not going to upset a happy couple.
yannberry@reddit
Mixed couple of nearly 14 years here; literally no one has ever batted an eyelid.
Mediocre_Bridge_9787@reddit
Who cares. Love whoever you want to love.
MarmiteX1@reddit
Depending where you are you will get looks from some people.
In my experience, I'm British Born Indian, I don't have that stereotypical indian accent that the west makes fun of
i've noticed if i'm socialising with white caucasian friends and i happen to be with a white woman, i do get looks from other white men and no- white men, not all but some.
SamCreated@reddit
The only people who have ever commented negatively on my (White British) relationship with my wife (British Indian) are British-Indian people, including some of her extended family.
Big-Parking9805@reddit
Family friend of mine had to hide his relationship with his now wife (British Indian) for 4 years because she knew her family wouldn't approve. She only told them because he collapsed at work with a heart condition and was scared he was going to die and wanted to be with him. He was only accepted a few years later.
XihuanNi-6784@reddit
Something that needs pointing out here, is that there's a difference between commenting and thinking. White people, as the majority, make a point of not commenting on minorities to avoid accusations of racism. This is good. Minorities are often less guarded with their speech. This is often bad. However, the lack of comment should not be taken as lack of issues. I'm black and I've been in interracial relationships and yes the most comments I've got directly have been from other minorities. But the subtle looks and weird oblique comments I get from white people are not that rare either.
CompetitiveServe1385@reddit
As a person from an Asian Indian background, I'm so sorry about what you experienced. There's still a lot of racism in these circles that isn't talked about enough in my opinion.
SamCreated@reddit
Yeah. I’m in the quite rare position of being a white man in the UK who has experienced overt racism in this country.
Vituperative_Camel@reddit
Maybe people have more of a problem over mixed religion marriages, rather than mixed race.
SamCreated@reddit
That too. “No BMW’s” is an unfortunately common dating and marriage saying among certain demographics of the British Indian community - no blacks, Muslims, or whites.
Ryanhussain14@reddit
My brother has a white girlfriend. His friends all know but our family keeps his relationship a secret from the rest of the Bangladeshi community in our city because it would be a scandal if they found out.
The_39th_Step@reddit
Same situation with me (like exactly the same apart from family. It’s just other brown people)
Golhec@reddit
This, as an Indian/white british couple the only people that stare are aunties/uncles when we go to places like wembley/southall.
lodius@reddit
I was going to write this as well, being a white British male, and my wife is British Indian. The only comments have only come from other Indian/Asian people. When we got engaged, only her side of the family made comments and some had issues. But none of my family or white friends batted an eyelid.
benjaminchang1@reddit
Same thing in the Chinese community (my grandparents weren't initially thrilled about their only son marrying a white woman). However, they came around and seem to like my mum (who's a lovely person).
asphytotalxtc@reddit
Yep, the only people who even blinked at my Pakistani friend and their white husband were her extended family from Pakistan. This is sadly true ...
SamCreated@reddit
She doesn’t really see family from India at all so not sure what they’d think.
asphytotalxtc@reddit
In my experience from working over there for three months, probably not all that bad... I'm just shocked it was the people who decided to emigrate who had the issue. I can't understand why!
CharlesHunfrid@reddit
Nobody really cares, it’s very common and regarded as completely normal
ViscountessdAsbeau@reddit
There's literally more interracial couples in the younger generation of our family than there are not. And a few in my (older) generation. No-one cares.
I live in the middle of nowhere in a stand of only 4 houses and there's been a couple where one partner was English but of Jamaican heritage, in our house there's English/Malaysian and Dutch/Indonesian and English-Italian-Jewish (Jewish family from Spain and Austria, originally), Polish/English and there's another house which is English/Japanese heritage.
I recently saw a moron online saying rural places in England are "exclusively all white" makiing them sound like racist gated communities - but that's nonsense spoken by an actual idiot who's probably never stepped foot in the countryside.
So that's people of English, Dutch, Italian, Polish Malaysian, Indonesian, European Jewish mainly came to England from Spain and also from Austria, Caribbean and Japanese heritage. In just 4 houses. In the countryside.
Nobody cares. We all get on brilliantly.
uujjuu@reddit
I've scrolled a little way down and not seen anyone mention the differing historical backgrounds of the countries, which blows my mind. Britain was a colonial empire that subsumed subjects from regions across the globe into its own identity.
America was a white settler colony, a early component part of that empire, that ethnically cleansed a continent and used African slave labor to build the white colonial state over that land, before putting them under apartheid segregation. There are very different historical currents shaping race relations in these regions.
Silverdale9999@reddit
Ex was Sri Lankan, I'm white British (or whatever the correct term is 😂) The only people who seemed to have an issue were Sri Lankan men whenever we went to family or community gatherings. Outside of that, no one ever seemed to care, even in the middle of nowhere Norfolk village where my parents lived.
fiverbitahash@reddit
This isnt America, most people generally dont care about race.
Bluetriller@reddit
Normal in UK, Europe and Australia. The USA is so backward in so many ways, as if yesterday’s election result didn’t prove it.
KumSnatcher@reddit
Literally nobody cares
Expensive-Twist8865@reddit
I dated a Jamaican girl, and we moved to my small town in the North of England.
I never experienced any issues with it.
ooh_bit_of_bush@reddit
Please tell me that you used the "Jamaica?" - "No, she did it of her own accord" joke at every opportunity.
meisobear@reddit
Not original commenter, but nearly 10 years in a similar relationship and, devastatingly, not once has this joke had an opportunity to be brought out :-(
Expensive-Twist8865@reddit
I usually go for "you're Jamaican me crazy", but make sure they're in a joking mood first...
TSotP@reddit
I've never met anyone under the age of 70 that even remotely gives a shit.
YorkieLon@reddit
"interracial couple" is a very American term. They're couples.
That should tell you enough.
Eclipse453@reddit
I'm White (British) and my partner is Asian (Indian) and when we first got together I was a little bit worried about how people would perceive us. But as others have mentioned you don't realise how common it is.
It did help that we both lived in London which is incredibly diverse. But even outside of London no one really cared or noticed. People just see us as a 'couple' no one ever mentions or questions the fact that we're interracial.
bluebe12@reddit
why were you worried? what did you think would happen? i understand why an asian would be worried, but what did you think would be the consequence for you? just curious
SowndsGxxd@reddit
In south London it’s v common
spinachmuncher@reddit
Erm what ? Who cares ? Love is love
Friendly-Sun2413@reddit
I actually think it depends , from my experience you always get the odd ones who think they own their whole ethnicity group and give weird looks if they see someone the same ethnicity as them marry or date outside of their own. Nobody will ever say anything to your face its more the looks or keyboard warriors online. Surprising it’s the younger generation I find are more like this.
Humble-Astronomer396@reddit
Nobody cares, you Americans are really weird
thechubbyballerina@reddit
The only person who `viewsʼ this is probably Tommy Robinson and his gang, the rest of us just get on with our day.
ADPriceless@reddit
…on adverts mostly. 🤔
ChannelLumpy7453@reddit
No one gives a shit. People are people and we are a mongrel nation.
lhr00001@reddit
Nobody even thinks twice, unless you're some sweaty gammon who gets riled up over literally anything. Luckily those kinds of people are the minority
mooohaha64@reddit
No one cares
ShinHayato@reddit
Nobody’s bothered mate
tricky12121st@reddit
Well, honestly depends on the area and interacial mix. Then you need to combine with area as the uk in london is way different to the uk in northern ireland.
Theres a phd in this for someone so eg:
Brit white to eng white -> 0% eyebrows raised in uk brit white to af/carib -> 30% eyebrow raising Brit ginger to hindi - > 74%
Etc Then area, gets a multiplier In london no one gives a shit, so a 0 multiplier In belfast youre gonna be talked about so maybe a 1.2 mult
DryIntroduction8889@reddit
I read this and thought about it. Only after a few minutes did it cross my mind that my best friend whose wedding attended 3 months ago is now married to another race. And his brother was there with his wife of a different race. It didn’t even spring to mind when I saw this post.
testfjfj@reddit
I'm currently single, but my ex boyfriend is white and i'm brown. The only time it was ever an issue was unfortunately with my (brown) family, e.g. my mum. Absolutely furious at me. With everyone else it was a complete non-issue.
Fortesfortunajuvat27@reddit
Just as a normal couple. Cos that’s what they would be. This question flummoxed me
pitchitdown@reddit
We're British, very welcoming and fucking great
Acceptable_Peen@reddit
What part of the US are you in?
oyfe77@reddit
No one cares
Stulewy1982@reddit
We dislike everyone equally so if actually find someone you like race doesn’t come into it
Motor_Magazine_9993@reddit
Yeah dude... No1 cares lol the only rule in Glasgow is that your not a dick... Everything else goes as far as I'm concerned c
todays_username2023@reddit
The majority of the UK are still in same race/culture couples, of whatever race.
But just watch UK TV adverts. Every family has to be portrayed as interracial, fish finger advert? guarantee it's a mixed race family, home security alarm advert? token diverse couple. Don't get your opinion from watching TV
darkzim69@reddit
I'm a white male and I've been married to a lady from S E Asia for about 20 years
I used to get the odd person saying to me "she's only with you for the visa" but as people got to know her she is just part of the town now , and we don't even get looked at
We live in a rural town in wales I think when she first came here their was only 2 people who where non white both from SE Asia but over time it might be close to 50 now we've had a kebab shop open and two Indian takeaway I imagine they have families ectra and a few more from other places
I think people here just look at new people more to protect themselves but its not a race thing its more a who are these new people in town, why are they here, maybe I should keep a eye on them
but no one really cares who your partner is or what race they are , they also don't care about your religion
they really just don't care.
Precipiceofasneeze@reddit
As a man who happens to be white, married to a woman who happens to be brown, most people don't give a shit.
We get occasional stares, sometimes people ask questions (well-meaning ones usually).
I find the only time anyone has an 'issue', it's invariably men of South Asian ethnicities.
Racism occurs everywhere between all kinds of communities. It's usually the ones who scream about being racially stereotyped/abused/judged that do the most stereotyping/abusing/judging.
That's only mi limited, anecdotal experience though.
DozzleWozzle@reddit
It's statistically likely their children will appear in an advert
SaluteTheSanguine@reddit
Never paid attention lol They are viewed simply as couples I guess.
skipskedaddle@reddit
https://youtu.be/Mwn9p_K67Hw?si=nIU_KoYgHEvzAVvZ
Famalam (BBC comedy) pokes some fun at this.
Big-Advertising-5366@reddit
Son of Turkish and Irish parents, born in London, here. I’ll be honest, the fact that Americans have a word for it weirds me out. People meet people.
PromotionStrict800@reddit
britain is like any other country, some people are racist however most people are not. if you have a safety concern then there’s pretty much nothing to worry about. vast majority of people here will see nothing but a happy couple
chuchoterai@reddit
It’s just the norm 🤷🏻♀️ Most people will know of one inter racial couple, especially in the cities. It’s a small country and people of different ethnicities freely and widely mix at school, at work, at leisure.
Ar72@reddit
My wife is Asian we've been married for 12 years now and only had one experience of racism from a drugged up female when we visited London. People don’t care
Prize-Ad7242@reddit
America views everything through the lense of race. It looks way over the top tbh.
There are some physical characteristics most found in certain ethnicities that I find to be particularly attractive but it’s not really a big thing tbh. We certainly never question interracial relationships. Anyone who does would be considered racist.
Complex_Shape1879@reddit
Depends where you are.. some people make their disgust clear with angry stares and mutters. Or if you encounter a group of drunk white men. One of them more then likely start some sort of trouble while playing off as a joke.
TheFishyPisces@reddit
Nobody ever talks about that tbh. They’re more curious about what wasn’t there in my home country. Some was genuinely curious as they’re older generation or haven’t visited abroad, but some was definitely rude.
SaveTheSterling@reddit
It’s not considered. I’m in one and it’s never been an issue or even close when I’m out and about in the UK.
CarpeCyprinidae@reddit
Basically every TV advert has one so it's normalised
lovesgelato@reddit
‘Oh there goes a couple I guess ‘
BurnUnionJackBurn@reddit
Having been the white half in one, it's unnoteworthy to most
Issues do arise when you face racism from their family for being white more often than the opposite
Historical-Egg1640@reddit
I also noticed as well when I first came to the UK 3 years ago, coming from South Africa where interracial couples are not a thing
stirianix@reddit
Nobody bats an eyelid.
Depends what culture you're positioned in though. I live in Birmingham and there are definitely communities that wouldn't mix.
Big_Poppa_T@reddit
We don’t care
Calibigirl69@reddit
We are a very diverse nation, and now for the most part very accepting.
DoctorMobius21@reddit
As others have said, no one really cares anymore. I certainly don’t. I’m a white male and I once dated a black woman for a bit. The only hostility I received was from her dad. Other than that, no one else cared.
Llaethenor@reddit
I would assume this has something to do with the proportions of race groups and different but linked histories of racism in the UK and the USA.
I am just remembering, but I believe the UK is 10-15% non-white, whereas in America it is something like 30-35% African-American alone, nevermind other minorities. This means there would be more opportunity to have a partner of one's own race - especially in a segregated country like the US.
Moreover, a lot of non-white immigration in the UK at least has been after the Second World War, whereas there has been racial segregation between white and black people in the USA since the first slaves were forced over. The populations are very different in that regard.
No_Pineapple9166@reddit
We’re not generally into all that identity stuff. Love who you love. Hardly anyone cares.
happybaby00@reddit
Ask a white man if he would date a white woman with a black ex or if they would stay with their white girlfriend who have dated black in the past, vast majority are saying no lol.
Even saying out loud that a white man's girlfriend dated a black guy is one of the biggest insults to their ego, a lot can take family insults and racial abuse from other races but mention this, a fight will instantly start 😂😂
gympol@reddit
Really? Where?
SecretKaleEater@reddit
It's not mentioned because it's normal. I don't know what other response there is?
VegetableWeekend6886@reddit
We’ve never had a government sanctioned segregated country. Yes, we have a lot of racism in the U.K. that was at its peak in the mid 20th century and still exists today. But particularly in urban areas, and (sorry but I have to point it out) between Black and white people within the same religion or social class, interracial couples are not batted an eyelid at. It would be far more notable if an Oxford graduate working in law married a council house tenant. America’s big issue is racism, the U.K.s big issue is classism.
dantes_b1tch@reddit
Human shagging another human you mean? Nah we don't care.
_Passing_Through__@reddit
It would never cross my mind to give this a second thought. Very normal in the U.K.
YourLizardOverlord@reddit
It's completely normal. 10% of couples in the UK are mixed race. If you lump them all together mixed race is the fastest growing race.
237583dh@reddit
There's the odd white person who has a problem with it, but they're usually the ones who have a general problem with brown people anyway. There are also some ethnic minority communities where there is some pressure to date/marry within the culture, but even then - its usually more about culture and religion than race as such.
DattoDoggo@reddit
In the past, I’ve found people of all ethnicities attractive. I’m a white guy and I’ve dated other ethnicities, it’s not a big deal.
Me and friends/past partners might make the occasional joke about one another’s cultural background but nothing prejudiced and no racial slurs etc. I think for anyone <40 years old it’s no biggie.
hoochiscrazy_@reddit
Normal?
Alert_Ad_5750@reddit
Nobody cares here, race doesn’t even come in to anybody’s mind. People from all backgrounds just go about their day.
Yes people will notice the physical differences but it doesn’t really go deeper than that. We are not race obsessed like Americans.
Yonel6969@reddit
On twitter people make a fuss of it (but it is twitter) irl though, people dont care, like at all. They care even less in bigger cities too. Its just a relationship innit
keltharan@reddit
it's not a black or white answer...
8Ace8Ace@reddit
Nobody cares.
Warriorz7@reddit
Usually on pornhub.
Forbidden_entity@reddit
Don't care, not a thing to care about
PurpleyPineapple@reddit
I'm a black woman from London. My partner is a white, ginger haired man from the north of England.
Weirdly the people I get the most shade from about being in an interracial relationship is other black people. It's not that frequent, but when it happens it almost always seems to come from a place of misogynoir and regarding black women like they're the physical property of the black community. It's a bizarre and narrow minded view that's easy to dismiss.
Never had any white british people give me shit about it though.
Matterbox@reddit
I don’t care what colour you are or your partner as long as you aren’t an asshole or some mad imaginary friend club idiot telling people they can’t wear a hat or have to wear a hat, pack it in.
baggington@reddit
Nobody gives a damn. We don't see everything through the lens of race.
That would be seen as pretty racist, to be honest.
CMan_82@reddit
No one would care in the slightest or even question it tbh.
splat_1234@reddit
One half of an interracial Indian-Asian/white couple here. Live in a small village in the midlands and it’s not an issue. Neighbours over the road are in an interracial gay relationship.
Only issue I (white woman) have had race wise is from Asian men in certain areas of London and my partner has had issues with other men from his culture but new immigrants questioning his choice of wife.
Husband is of a higher social class than me - that has been an issue - I don’t fit in always due to class in our social circle and it’s imo much more an issue than race.
BigBunneh@reddit
Maybe it's that we're such a small place in comparison, that people of different ethnic backgrounds just rub shoulders more maybe? Whatever the reason, we're just more likely to know and mix with people of different colour that it's just not an issue. If someone thought it was an issue, then they're seen as the ones with a problem.
chorizo_chomper@reddit
Nobody cares here mate, who your partner is, that's your business.
Nerry19@reddit
I mean i can only speak from my point of view, I'm sure people have vastly worse experiences....but no one has ever seemed even slightly bothered, or even mentioned it. I had a few people comment about his heritage/name etc in general but never anything relating to us being a couple.
Closest would be a woman at work "oh i just assumed he was english" despite him having a very not English name, but honestly, there was no malice in it at all.
BlueTrin2020@reddit
It’s a bit weird to ask this here, at least in big cities it’s definitely something nobody would care about.
redalgee@reddit
Depends really, personally I couldn't give a shit. You do you and love is love and all that. I'd probably only ever say something to someone if I were really close friends with them and saw them everyday. Others though, might say somthing? Can't always guarantee they won't but I don't think 'race' is really a thing here? Great Britain is a product of a fading empire that covered the globe and there's people from everywhere that ended up living here for all sorts of reasons. Religious differences seems to be our main divider currently. You may get asked "Where are you from" from time to time maybe but if you have an American accent, we'll know!
secrethedgehog5@reddit
Its a very normal thing? I was in an interracial relationship once
newtonbase@reddit
Not really an issue over here and TBF my wife and I have been to the US a few times and not had a problem there either. They do get a bit excited about a black woman with an English accent though.
Aggravating_Piano_29@reddit
In England, Scotland, Northern Ireland, or Wales, you're more likely to be judged for dating someone from one of the other 4 countries of the UK than someone of a different race.
LWDJM@reddit
I think you misunderstand how little we care when it comes to matters such as this.
Questioning it is odd.
It perfectly normal.
xeprone1@reddit
As soon as I read the title I thought it’s gotta be an American. Nobody cares
Labionda20@reddit
I think it really depends where you are. I live in London and my husband is mixed race, no issues. I have to say we live in an area that used to have a very dense Eastern European population and they have been the only people that have ever stared at us. This still happens on public transport with Eastern European tradesmen specifically. Outside of London we have had some strange looks in places like Kent, coastal towns etc.
dnnsshly@reddit
I'm white, wife's black. Been together 12 years. Never had so much as a comment.
Eastern-Move549@reddit
I think the correct answer here is 'in hd'
I don't really know anyone that could care less except the standard racist old git.
AccountFar86@reddit
I'd recommend reading https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Bamber_Bridge
The UK is far from perfect, but didn't have racial segregation in the same way as the USA.
RobertTheSpruce@reddit
I don't think people really care. On the internet you will occasionally see complains about interracial couple on TV (the type of weirdos that complain about "woke") but IRL you don't really hear it anymore.
Pugsy0202@reddit
It's not a big deal.
DrogoOmega@reddit
No one cares. Britain places much less emphasis on race on… well basically everything, compare to Americans.
throwawaykinkl@reddit
I have a friend whos parents are pakistanit She was born here They completely cut her off for dating a white man She's just amazing and they are missing out.
bluecheese2040@reddit
I've never had a problem ever.
I think we should really be proud of how well integrated most of us are.
Strangly enough the only place I've seen problems is with a Nigerian friend of mine whose family were pissed off beyond words that he was going to marry a somali girl.
So...and here's my controversial bit...sorry...as white folks often talk about 'black people' they ignore that there are different groups within 'black' people. So when you talk about interracial you should also include examples like the one above.
ExLatinDancer@reddit
I've been married ( I'm black West Indian, she's white English) for the last 34 years. Have we been viewed differently on occasion? Yes. Interestingly for the most part was about people 'trying' to be supportive as they were worried about how we would be treated by others. I think it's fair to say in the UK we have never had any obvious problems from others. However, when on holiday abroad we would get some odd looks, BUT nothing has ever been said to us. I guess if you come across as pretty jovial or confident in your own skin, no pun intended, people tend to get on with your life. All the above being said, I'm sure there are parts of the UK and other parts of the world our relationship would be frowned upon.
Stunning-Wave7305@reddit
Most people don't care and/or don't notice.
Now you've mentioned it, I know a lot of interracial couples (I'm in my early 40s) of various combinations and society as a whole really doesn't care. It is so common.
Of course, some people and some communities (of all backgrounds) do care. But on the whole, most people honestly don't care.
Dirty2013@reddit
Nobody really give a shit
Altruistic_Act_7883@reddit
They aren’t because there are none.
Zeratul_Artanis@reddit
I don't know a white guy who hasn't dated someone from another race.
The only issue I've heard of is cultural blocks from dating, which happens irrespective of race.
EathanR1@reddit
I've worked with a lot of Asians in the past (Indian type of Asian, not the other type) and they've almost always had issues with Asians dating outside of themselves. The young ones say it's because their parents wouldn't approve, the old ones were almost always married already. Everyone else I've ended up talking about it with weren't bothered
pm_me_your_amphibian@reddit
It’s 2024 mate.
I know you’re losing it over the other side of the pond but this is weird.
Federal-Breakfast762@reddit (OP)
Thank…. You? Haha 😅. I was not expecting this many responses to be honest. I was expecting just one “You’re fucking weird,” comment and then just go about my day…..
Meanwhile I can’t even get my best friend to reply to a text 🥲
pm_me_your_amphibian@reddit
One thing you’ll learn about us, we couldn’t give a shit about who is in a relationship with who, but, we do really like correcting Americans.
Federal-Breakfast762@reddit (OP)
That last part I definitely know, lol. It’s all good though. Saying “We’ve got a lot of problems here” in the States is an understatement, unfortunately. I have nothing but love for ya’ll across the pond though. I miss my time over there 😔
IssueMoist550@reddit
An absolute non issue.....
ThrwAwayAdvicePlease@reddit
It's weird to even ask, no one cares over here, why would they?
B0bbaDobba@reddit
Interacial couple nod is a thing no matter how “normal it is”
In England racism exists but it’s hidden.
AdorxLacey@reddit
no one cares at all, people would be confused if you asked this
zippyzebra1@reddit
It would have to be pointed out to me. I doubt i'd notice
Firm-Line6291@reddit
Us Brits aren't hung up on race like Americans are. I found that odd when I lived in America.
TagierBawbagier@reddit
There's occasional pogroms. But it's mostly quiet.
nottodayffs@reddit
It’s so normal that one of my co-workers who is (was) married to a white guy had a mixed baby
Nebulousdbc@reddit
"Was"
TagierBawbagier@reddit
Bang as many as you like.
ignatiusjreillyXM@reddit
Britain is divided by class, not what Americans call race. Our society judges people far more by their accent than the colour of their skin
No_Builder_7250@reddit
They can only be viewed on the last Friday before shrove sathursday, every other leap month, with a special tool, like an eclipse box.
PsychologicalAd4430@reddit
It’s disgusting and fairly rife but most people allow it
Inturnelliptical@reddit
No one really takes any notice , except the stupid people, who are most probably racist or jealous.
anniday18@reddit
It's absolutely the norm here. When my brother married his wife, who is Chinese. We were all extremely happy for them and celebrated the fact that our family has become more diverse.
ReySpacefighter@reddit
I can't comment much because I don't hear people talk about it, and in my own life the people I know never have because it's not an issue. But I also won't pretend that there's not a group of people that will take issue with it, even if they don't say it to your face.
No_Camp_7@reddit
I think you’re right. Race is none of anyone’s business nowadays. Inter-ethnic maybe because that has more to do with cultural identity and experience.
I am biracial. When I think about that, kind of sounds like the people who invented the term were a bit obsessed with keeping tabs on what race you were. It’s got a “one drop rule” ring to it.
crawenn@reddit
They're not viewed at all, it's entirely their business who they're sharing a bed with
AstraofCaerbannog@reddit
It’s not something I’ve ever really thought about being strange, which is probably due to my growing up in the UK.
Some of it may be partially because we have a very low black population here (like 1% or something), so kids/grandkids from the windrush generation are often pretty well integrated into “white” society, so obviously they’re friends with and date white people. While there is racism here, it’s socially considered very poor form, so there’s less stigma around mixing. I would say a lot of white people seem pretty keen to have a black friend just to not feel racist (take what you will of that).
When you look at communities who have a large population of a cultural minority in one area you tend to see a lot less mixed raced couples and more division between groups. People tend to gravitate towards familiarity, and it can be hard to integrate into a new culture, so that’s probably more similar to what people see in the USA.
DueAcanthocephala329@reddit
Meghan Markle that’s all you need to know about interracial couples.
They are in “No Man’s Land”. Their relationship better be strong because, everyone’s got an opinion on it. Just my opinion.
dazedan_confused@reddit
With our eyes, wdym?
nineteenthly@reddit
Whereas it's important to acknowledge people's identity, I'm afraid I don't think about it much when I see a couple whose members have visibly different ethnicity.
CaptainBartholomew@reddit
With my eyes
tinned_peaches@reddit
If you watched any adverts or U.K. TV you would think every couple are inter-racial.
klneeko@reddit
Occasionally me and my partner get looks. However, I think it's because he is Arab and people assume he is Muslim so expect me to be a revert. Sometimes we get second glances when out with our children, seeing as the youngest has red hair. Otherwise, it's pretty chill and half the time I forget I am in a multiracial relationship.
mycatiscalledFrodo@reddit
The tiny minority might say something but on the whole we don't care
Stuffedwithdates@reddit
Honestly there are loads of white people in the UK that would never dream of marrying outside their race. Most of them are older and even then manners stop them commenting on those who do.
desertterminator@reddit
Depends where abouts you are. Its quite rare here out in rural areas surrounding London. There are also certain stereotypes associated with it too, for example a black man will only go for a white woman if she has a big bum, and when you see it you nod to yourself like some kind of well informed sage.
I'm enlightened enough that I don't really care, I got bigger fish to fry than caring about who's with who, but its still rare enough to draw my attention if I'm zombie-ying my way down a high street.
Vivid_Way_1125@reddit
No one cares about this stuff here
ButterflySamosa@reddit
As a British Pakistani girl/another minority girl just trying to survive:
There are a lot of white British people in these comments, who have never experienced racism in their entire lives, who are going to tell you that it's no issue, and the UK is all sunshine and rainbows and oh so much better than America. They're fucking lying. That's all I have to say :)
Vaudane@reddit
With suspicion.
Just like same race couples.
Or homosexual couples.
Or straight couples.
Or singles.
Or the dutch.
All with suspicion.
the-real-vuk@reddit
nobody cares mate
FetchingKyoto@reddit
It’s definitely not an ignorant or dumb question. And I know that many British people say this doesn’t exist in the UK, but here is my experience:
I am a White American man married to a Brown British woman.
It definitely exists in the UK. In general, British people are very self-contained and reserved (not in an unfriendly way though). So, you don’t really get a sense of their true feelings unless you befriend them or anger them. However, when interacting online, British people are almost indistinguishable from Americans in terms of voicing their opinions and feelings. In America, as you know, people are much more open about how they feel and what they believe, for better or worse.
Given that above context, however, what we do encounter frequently, is a lot of staring. Our British house is in a predominantly “Asian” (using the UK definition) area. We get a lot of stares, not just quick glances but full-on staring. Strange looking stares that genuinely make you feel uncomfortable. It has reached the point where my wife feels uncomfortable going into certain shops run by other Middle Eastern people (her ethnic group), so I go in by myself while she waits in the car to avoid the awkwardness.
An uncomfortable stare is certainly nothing compared to overt bigotry or racism that is experienced by many non-whites in America, but it does indeed exist in a lesser extent in the UK.
Jacey_T@reddit
Interestingly, I remember many years back working in media and TV that, while no one batted an eye here, if we wanted shows to air in US, we had to keep couples same race.
Awful! And sad to hear that it hasn't changed much.
GeorgieH26@reddit
I’m mixed race (one black parent, one white) and am married to a white man. My parents said there were some comments when they first got together in the 80s but not many, I’ve never seen anyone bat an eye with my husband and I. Every day, especially this one, I am grateful I don’t like in America.
Rickys1622@reddit
No one cares
-Kryptic@reddit
this question alone. shows the state of the US.
Abject-Direction-195@reddit
I'm from Betelgeuse and my wife is from Sigma 5. No one bat's an eyelid
Creepy_Soup4117@reddit
Where I am in the UK, (small town), it isn't exactly viewed as a good thing. You'll understand when you hear people talking about so and so going out with some such colour person etc. But mostly you won't see anyone overtly making it an issue, although I do notice side eye looks sometimes or even some dirty looks, but again nobody ever really says anything to your face.
mkaybabesyoudoyou@reddit
I’m mixed, partner is Eastern European, totally normal. My mum is black and dad is white, again no issue. BUT when my mum went to America and made friends with a group of black women they completely snubbed her after finding out her husband was white 🤷🏽♀️ I really was hoping that was not representative of most Americans though
FilthyDogsCunt@reddit
No one cares, we're much more concerned with class.
EM-JAY-EFF@reddit
FilthyDogsCunt is right, we're a classy bunch.
AugustCharisma@reddit
If it helps, I’m a professor. I’ve had American foreign exchange students tell me that things are much better here in terms of racism.
Appropriate_Emu_6930@reddit
I have honestly not thought about it before
thebrowncanary@reddit
According to TV adverts it's the only kind of couple in the UK.
InvictusPretani@reddit
Depends where you're from honestly.
It's taboo to say anything, but behind closed doors some people likely will. Same as anywhere.
To be honest, the people I've met who were most against any interracial mixing have typically been first generation Asians.
Tski247@reddit
You like who you like, it is what it is.🤷🏾♂️
Kat8844@reddit
It’s normal and not something people tend to notice or have an opinion on much.
Technically I suppose I’m part of an interracial couple,although we are both white so not sure if you could count it as one-I’m British and she’s Russian, it’s never something I’ve given any thought to and have never had it mentioned, thankfully people mentioning or commenting on us being a lesbian couple is very rare too.
Of course in the eyes of some Americans she’d be red,lefty demonspawn that has turned me gay and is in league with the KGB 🤣.
Glittering_Voice_615@reddit
As a member of an international couple in Scotland, basically no-one but foreigners care. I've never had a Scot mention it, but Asian constantly mention it and throw dirty looks.
blind_disparity@reddit
America is extremely segregated compared to most European countries. As well as America having some very outdated attitudes about the importance of race.
I think most people in England wouldn't think of people as being 'different' because of their skin colour, any more than you'd think that way about people with different colour hair.
There might be some concern if people were from significantly different cultures, but that's only based on actual incompatibilities. Like if one person was devoutly religious from a strict branch, and the other was atheist. And it would be a question to ask, not an assumption based on their looks.
This isn't to pretend that there isn't an unpleasantly large minority of racists in England, who would think it was bad to date outside your race. But that's very much not normal. Most people would be disgusted at hearing that idea.
Mintyxxx@reddit
I can't watch US stand up because all they seem to bang on about is race race race. It just sounds racist to me, it's like, give it a rest and say something clever or witty.
Track_2@reddit
We’ve much more important things to worry about, like the incredible price of Heinz Beans, I simply cannot get it to compute.
Sad-Personality8493@reddit
Sofa ads. There. I said it.
_Dracarys98@reddit
It’s very normal
burundilapp@reddit
As… couples! Enough with the labels already.
Dark_Akarin@reddit
Couldn’t give a fuck tbh.
penguin62@reddit
Personally never had issues as a white guy dating an ethnically chinese girl.
She's had to deal with racism, but we collectively havent.
matomo23@reddit
No one is bothered mate. Got some in my family and I don’t recall it ever being mentioned. The rest of us in the family are white.
But remember, Americans on Reddit insist that the US is not the least bit racist and the UK is very, very racist.
Mrszombiecookies@reddit
Personally I always love when couples are diverse looking. I think people are interesting to look at though. I've never heard anyone bothering about their race. I'm from Scotland and they seem to be more bothered if they're Catholic or not 🙄
szcesTHRPS@reddit
Most people I know aren't racists so wouldn't care but we have our problems with racism and racists just like every other country.
MerlinMusic@reddit
I'm white and my wife is black. I don't think anyone British has ever questioned it. I think there was a Nigerian guy at my work who made a weird comment like "Oh, you like black girls" but that kind of thing is very rare.
Honestly I find it really disheartening that those kinds of comments and questions are so common in your experience.
I have always found it weird that couples in American TV shows/films always seem to be the same race.
Bobandvagane@reddit
I don’t think the UK is more diverse than the blue states, especially when it comes to race and interracial relationships.
Justgotrealmayn@reddit
Yeah very normal over here. Lots of children of mixed ethnicity here as well. Hell, I’m with someone of a different ethnicity. Occasionally you will get someone who may give the odd look but they are the minority.
shbgetreal@reddit
No one gives AF.
The few that do, they're just nobs.
6ftnsassy@reddit
It’s not something that most people over here would even think twice about. You might get some flack more for religious reasons than anything and there are always bigots to some extent wherever you go. But overall, I don’t think in the U.K. and Western Europe people would bat an eyelid.
Ruminate_Repeat@reddit
Who the fuck is this guy?
BroccoliSubstantial2@reddit
It used to be quite segregated, and this was just an accepted form of racism that people felt was natural, like heterosexuality.
Gradually these attitudes softened and we had interracial scenes on TV and, now its normal, healthy and liberating. Why would anyone other than a bigoted idiot want to go back? Some misguided offence against what's fair?
yellowredpink@reddit
we dont care about race as much as america
SaltySAX@reddit
Nor a silly flag.
Neil2250@reddit
I'll have you know my white-horse-on-red-flag is beautiful.
RuneClash007@reddit
Up the Medway
CongealedBeanKingdom@reddit
Northern Ireland enters the chat
Lovely flegs
Theo_Cherry@reddit
Who's "we?"
yellowredpink@reddit
the uk
OgreOfTheMind@reddit
The UK. The subreddit should give it away.
_MicroWave_@reddit
Literally half the national football (soccer) team is mixed race. No one bats an eye.
Secretlyablackcat@reddit
It's quite normal, I'm English and married a Scot!!
A joke, we're both white, but it's normal, though in some small rural towns might not be very common. The town I grew up in had one Chinese family and one black family, everyone else was white
Any-Woodpecker4412@reddit
No one will bat an eye. Especially in London - I swear every couple is an interracial couple.
Interesting-Two-4363@reddit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mwn9p_K67Hw
FrankLebouefCurtains@reddit
Compulsory when casting for adverts.
ZoltanGertrude@reddit
That is funny. What an odd question! Do they really think that in the US?
FistWithHair@reddit
I’m in an interracial marriage and the question genuinely baffles me. Is America really that backward? It’s a non issue here
LillieBouchon@reddit
My daughter, white, has a biracial partner who is black skinned with long black dreads. Both sides of the family are totally happy with the mixed race relationship and the two gorgeous little girls they have together, one black-looking and the other white-passing. They are the prettiest and sweetest grandchildren! ❤️
Character_Mention327@reddit
It's not the 1980s anymore. Only dickheads care about this kind of thing.
FlagVenueIslander@reddit
I was part of an interracial couple for a few years. The only time I ever noticed anything other than complete normality was when we went to music festivals and I realised just how few people there were then who looked like my partner
Scrambledpeggle@reddit
No one cares. The great majority of people here aren't racist.
X0AN@reddit
Completely normal, saying interacial couple itself would be weird.
They're just a couple.
Gold-Environment2071@reddit
We don’t really care
Gold-Environment2071@reddit
In the nicest way possible
louna312@reddit
I am French and just saw this post so I would like to add that in France, the notion of race is really controversial. We all know about ethnicity and stuff, but race is not a notion accepted, bc it is seen as racist (throw back to slavery/WW2 when there were talk of a '''better/lesser race''').
But also generally, people don't really care about race/ethnicity. There are a lot of racism still, especially a lot around people who are Muslim, and it does count in the physical aspect of a person, but to most people, it is not a big deal, especially to the younger generation.
KiokoMisaki@reddit
Loo, I can't even count home many "different" couples I know. Race mixing, nationality mixing, gender mixing, it's almost every other. And I love learning about their lives (I get in contact with loads people on personal level) and how they incorporate family traditions etc. It's beautiful that people are free to do it with whoever they want.
Outrageous-Radio4790@reddit
Your question is puzzling to me. Maybe I have resided in a thriving metro, college, state government, research, technology center with plenty of diverse people groups my entire life, that I would never consider such a thought. To me here in the States, interracial couples are simply couples.
perkyknits@reddit
I’m from a small predominantly white town in the UK and even here I think the vast majority of people wouldn’t bat an eyelid. It would be a minority who would even comment on it, negatively or positively.
TheScottishMoscow@reddit
Honestly if a TV advert couple wasn't mixed race that might raise more questions than the reality of seeing it in the street such is how little it matters here.
Embarrassed-End-3223@reddit
This
Potato-4-Skirts@reddit
Yeah it’s not really an issue here. I’m white and my partner is black, occasionally I’ve had slightly weird comments from older people, but usually well-intentioned and just not quite landed right (e.g. speculating about the colour of our children).
Never noticed a funny look or a negative comment from strangers in the nearly 12 years we’ve been together.
StagnantMonk@reddit
Not my business who nibbles ya knobble mate. 🤛🏻
Federal-Breakfast762@reddit (OP)
“Nibbles ya knobble” 🤣 🤜🏾 thank you, I needed that chuckle today
StagnantMonk@reddit
I hear ya fella. Lol were all head scratching today
LazarusOwenhart@reddit
Nobody bats an eyelid because we're not a right wing hellscape voting in nazis.
The-Mayor-of-Italy@reddit
We've never had any comments from British people in 12 years of marriage. Only two comments I got were from a Ukranian guy and a Turkish guy - nothing particularly disparaging, just noticing it more than British people do.
Admirable-Debt-2352@reddit
It does depend. I'm a white female, and in the past, I dated two black (African) guys, years apart. When living in Brighton (very liberal seaside town), honestly, no one (at least from what I noticed) batted an eyelid, but when in some parts of London and even in large towns like Reading, we did get lots of stares and looks which felt quite uncomfortable sometimes.
miguelangel011192@reddit
Why Americans are always so focus into the race of people? Racism exists everywhere, but no everyone is thinking how much interracial a couple is when you are walking on the streer
KillerDr3w@reddit
Completely normal and not something we even think about.
It's only today that most of the UK has realized just how much racism half of the US forces the other half to put up with.
Xenaspice2002@reddit
It’s so normal that when ER had an interracial couple and that caused drama I had to ask my US friends why it was an issue in the first place.
Meincornwall@reddit
My parents told me (white male) to not date black girls.
Although they thought it was fine, the other people didn't accept it.
I got a bollocking for pointing out "But aren't you the other people's other people when you say that?"
Interestingly, many many years later, my father compulsively stared at my black fiancée's tits at every opportunity.
So he didn't discriminate with boobs, I guess.
jjtnc@reddit
Its a bit wierd to even acknowledge it, my mum and her partner and my dad and his partner are. Lots of people i know are but never think anything of it.
marshallandy83@reddit
There are a few interracial couples in my wider friendship group, but now I'm thinking about it, they tend to be more one white person and one mixed-race (white and another race).
I can't speak for any discrimination my friends have experienced, but it seems to be completely normalised here.
This could be related to our advertising. If you watched one commercial break here you'd be forgiven for thinking that homoethnic relationships were the outliers.
GdanskinOnTheCeiling@reddit
These days? In 4k.
No_Designer_9356@reddit
It’s important to realise that Racism in the U.K. and racism in the US are not the same thing. Maybe funds they have some of the same basic principles, but they branch off and thankfully the U.K. becomes much more accepting much more quickly than the US. I get that this is a massive generation, but it feels like this is broadly what OP is referring to.
rogermuffin69@reddit
Because we do it in real life, not just in hardcore pornos. 🤣
According_Sundae_917@reddit
generally very few problems in public but as someone who’s been in interracial relationships, the reality is that YES SOMETIMES there are issues - things I was totally unaware of before being in a mixed couple myself.
These subtle examples are more common than we might expect (white male dating black woman in 20s to 30s).
relatives quietly expressing preference for grandchildren to ‘look like us’
older generation members of the public showing visible disapproval when holding hands
friends asking ‘so do you have a “thing” for black women then?’ like it’s so strange
ignorant stereotyping by friends asking stuff like ‘does she twerk for you?’
oddly, sometimes strangers say things like ‘what a beautiful couple you are’ (which feels like a nice compliment) but definitely feels like it’s centred around being an interracial couple.
certain relatives not taking the relationship seriously, subtext being that a serious relationship would ultimately be between two of same culture/race, this must be just a phase etc.
So although none of these things remotely deter me from feeling an interracial relationship is safe here in the U.K. - there are plenty of things sitting beneath the surface that you will only encounter from experiencing a IR relationship.
Sidebottle@reddit
I know exactly what you mean. It's like nails down a blackboard, it just hits something and feels so very wrong.
There is also frankly quite big difference between different groups. I've known friends who have run into the South Asians 'family expectations'. I've known a few black girls who have a serious beef with black guys dating non-black women (never the other way round). These aren't older generations either.
moriartyinasuit@reddit
This is I feel the most sensible response. I think the comments about “no-one cares” are perhaps overlooking some of these more subtle microaggressions. No-one may say anything explicit (and they may not even mean their comments maliciously), but I think it certainly can be “noticed” in a way that non-interracial couples are not.
And as part of this, I certainly think there is a tendency to generalise on people’s interests, particularly (?) when it comes to saying someone black is attractive. For me, I’ve just noticed that, for example, in response to a sibling saying of a black guy “Oh he was hot” and me humming agreeable, said sibling immediately responded “Oh, so you like black guys?” As if this is the first person I’ve ever shown an interest in and the fact that I indicated one black guy is attractive means I’m “into” black guys?? Similarly, one friend stating that he’s noticed I’m “into black guys” when I’m like… on what evidence??? I’m no more into them than any other race…
But mentioning finding someone black attractive seems to stick more in someone’s mind than any other race ¯_(ツ)_/¯
VoidThing@reddit
Agree, the reminders are subtle but they are there. I think “no one cares” = “no one consciously cares” but unconscious bias does slip out.
White woman married to an East Asian man in London, and we have it pretty easy, but have the opposite issue — people treating us as not-a-couple, which does grate sometimes. It’s too often to be a coincidence in my eyes.
We exhibit the normal amount of pda and are well matched (neither is “punching”) but still have had well-intentioned dudes on the Tube warning me that “that guy just took your iPad out of your bag” (it’s his iPad, his pockets are too small so it’s in my bag) and have showed up to couple-centric group activities for weeks and be the only ones to be introduced as “X and her friend Y.” In the greater scheme of things it’s not a big deal, obvs I much prefer this over overt or violent racism but it’s not nothing.
According_Sundae_917@reddit
Agree, the no one cares comments may be slightly naive. Most don’t care. But Some people care a bit, very few will say so publicly
d3gu@reddit
The question about whether you liked 'white boys' seems to strange to me. Surely attractiveness transcends race/skin colour? As a white woman, I don't look at Idris Elba and think 'he's hot for a black guy', I just think 'he's hot'.
I think there may be some older people, or particularly racist individuals, who disapprove of interracial relationships, but I think it's less the relationship they disapprove of and more hatred towards the non-white person.
Hcmp1980@reddit
It's.... a nothing.
Real-Fortune9041@reddit
If you watch any Uk adverts, you would think that every single couple in the country were interracial.
more-sarahtonin-plss@reddit
Race isn’t as big of a deal here as it is in the USA. Very few will have an answer to this because I highly doubt many will have ever once given this a second thought.
not_a_number1@reddit
What gave you the impression that you needed to ask that question?
nervous_veggie@reddit
In cities generally no one would give a toss, some (many) rural areas have markedly little racial diversity so they might notice it but in general terms it’s a non-issue.
AquaMaz2305@reddit
My late parents from different cultures were married over 60 years ago and had friends who were in a similar situation, so I never questioned it. It was only after her death that I discovered my white mother had left her home country for good in her early 20s to escape a rightwing, despotic father. She always told me that biracial children were cleverer and smarter than regular kids as we were from a deeper, richer gene pool. The opposite of marrying your first cousin!🤣
GoingGreyer@reddit
Mixed Race couples are generally accepted without comment here in the UK, Im pleased to say and , as the older generations diminish it will get even better because I think they are the ones with the most prejudice iin this area. I say this because I know my own parents still find it a little difficult to accept ( theyre in their 80's).
Of course we sadly have our little pockets of nasty racists who will still not accept it but they are fortunately very much the minority.
Greasy_Piglet@reddit
If you watch a British TV advert break you'll see that all relationships are interracial in this country now.
trustmeimabuilder@reddit
My girlfriend is from the other village, we've been shunned.
Colonel_Khazlik@reddit
I'm a white dude, Caribbean partner.
No problems for us, I imagine there might be some places that there's some issues but I can't see it.
A lot of very white areas don't have the racial issues you'd see in similar environments in the US, if you've never had black folks around, it's hard to generate hatred.
--iCantThinkOFaName-@reddit
Seen as pretty normal generally.
Only, this reminds me of when I was younger, heard about a white man out with his dark-skinned mixed race kids who got the police called on him for kidnap, that was before 2010 though.
nostalgebra@reddit
If you watch adverts and british TV you'd think approx 70 percent of the nation is in an inter racial relationship. In reality its fairly common and nobody cares.
Ambitious-Math-4499@reddit
I'm white and my fiancé is black and fir the most part nobody cares but we do get some funny looks very occasionally from the older generation 😂
KeremyJyles@reddit
Quite frankly the only objections regarding the subject I have ever heard in person in the UK were from male ethnic minorities bitter about "their women" mixing with white men.
Jaded_You_9120@reddit
I'm a White Brit who's married to a Chinese American. He was literally SHOCKED at how many other people were in mixed race relationships when he came over to the UK to visit.
He told me, to this day, he's never seen a couple over the age of 45 in a mixed-race relationship in America.
Funny thing is, I've lived in the states for 6 years now, and neither have I.
In the UK, I don't even bat an eyelid it's that common.
Aggravating_Bend_622@reddit
As someone from the UK who has lived in the US for 10 years I don't think most people care. Maybe in some small towns you may get more stares but in major cities like London or NYC Chicago etc in the USA no one cares.
theillepo@reddit
Scotland based. My gf is black from Philly in the US. We get some wild looks from Africans, but everyone is chill.
nesh34@reddit
Usually with my eyes, from a dark corner whilst hiding my face.
scrappy_bong@reddit
No1 cares. We're not that childish.
Pretend-City6652@reddit
Depends where you go - but 90% of the time no one will bat an eyelid
Most cities or progressive large towns - very normal
Small ‘white’ towns or rural areas, with little diversity may raise eyebrows… but in true English style no one is going to say anything lol
Prestigious_Bell3720@reddit
Its normal here, a few of my classmates are dating interracially and I was born from an interracial marriage too
apainintheokole@reddit
In general it is normal - however, there is a lot of backlash in certain parts of society. For example, we have a lot of first-generation Indians and Pakistanis who are very traditional when compared to their children and grandchildren who have grown up in the UK. They often are still of the mindset that their children should marry into the same nationality as them - i.e. say they were from India, then their daughter should marry an Indian boy.
Their children often think differently and it does cause a bit of strife in those families and communities. It has even resulted in a bit of violence generally against the daughters as they are often considered to have disgraced the family. Many young people from these nationalities find they have to hide their relationships from their families.
Outside these communities, it is accepted more readily. I think some of the older Chinese families can have a similar attitude to some of the Indians and Pakistani families, but not so readily.
ATerriblePurpose@reddit
Whenever I see a couple, I get happy. Even if it turns sour eventually. At the point I see them I think ‘nice, there’s two happy people right there’. Race really isn’t a thing. I’m so bored at this colour thing. Of course I see colour but acting on a base of colour is just odd. Hopeless idealist.
Realistic_Let3239@reddit
Unless you're racist, you don't care. Maybe you would take note in the more rural places where you see it less, otherwise it's just part of life.
markhewitt1978@reddit
Nobody gives it a second thought. The very idea that anyone would ask the question is distinctly strange.
bobzimmerframe@reddit
Nobody in your bubble does but we clearly have our own problems in this country.
jsm97@reddit
As an English speaking country we're still more obsessed with it than Continental Europe. I don't think it's entirely a bad thing either but just things like Starmer congratulating Badenoch on being the first black leader of major political party isn't something that would happen in France because in French and many other European languages the word for "race" is itself considered to be racist because it translates more like "breed". I've lived in 2 EU countries and have never been asked to state my ethnicity on a job application like I have here (Yes I know you can choose prefer not to say).
I think there's a balance to be had between recognising that race is a pseudoscientific social construct but also recognising that people do racially discriminate and we do need talk about it to discuss how to make sure discrimination isn't happening.
springsomnia@reddit
Nobody really cares much. In more rural areas you tend to still get racists but even there, interracial couples aren’t an issue and it will be absurd to ask someone in the UK this question!
MrR0undabout@reddit
Generally I agree with most of the comments here that indifference is basically the default in this regards.
But tbh, I have experienced issues with dating someone of another race. Members of her community were actively hostile to me, got threatened with violence once. Her mum was lovely and accepting as were her brothers. Her dad (seperated from mum and lived apart) told me he is going to get her cousins and some mates to beat me up unless we broke up.
That said I feel this may have been more to religion than ethnicity.
Wetsock96@reddit
Having one white and one black parent is something I’ve never thought of. I think the fact that you asked this question is strange, it’s not like one’s human and the other isn’t.
Weird_Object8752@reddit
We’re not racists like some folks stateside lass
RichMagazine2713@reddit
Nobody cares
Appropriate-Divide64@reddit
No one gives a shit. My wife is Asian and the only people who bring it up are... Let's just say weird guys with Asian wives, who want to talk to you about their Asian wife.
In the past I've dated black and Indian girls in the past, no one cares or bothers you. The Indian community can be a little odd, often they prefer the women to date other Indians, but if you're respectful they don't care too much. Although I have had comments along the lines of "at least she's not dating a black guy, or worse, a Muslim".
West_Degree9730@reddit
No one really care .
whiskeydumplings@reddit
I would be interested to know how many commenters are speaking from experience. From mine as a white woman married to a black man, and with a mixed race child, it noticeably makes some people feel uncomfortable. We get stared at, have occasionally been made to feel very unwelcome at places, I’ve been asked what’s wrong with white men etc.
My parents have always been very supportive of me dating whoever I want, whenever they are from, and have welcomed my husband with open arms from the starts. My husband’s family were the opposite, they wanted him to marry someone from their country and it was a big struggle for them to accept me. But we got there in the end.
We tend to use “mixed race couple” or “mixed couple”. I don’t know if that’s a British thing or an us thing. But generally I don’t tend to hear “interracial” being used here.
StrangerealSensei@reddit
At the end of the day a couple is just 2 human beings who found a common ground through which they could romantically resonate. Why should their skin colour be a deciding factor? There is no expectation from UK society to ‘pick a player in the same kit’.
Inkblot7001@reddit
We (wife and I) are an interracial couple and I have never had a single derogatory thing said or even heard in the background. Not in 15 years. I used to be ready for it, but never had it.
Before she met me, when younger, she experienced direct and horrible racism.
But maybe times have thankfully changed or just it is just where we live (SW London). I doubt it is because I am with her, LOL, I am not some giant and scary guy.
Long may it continue.
Tashimo@reddit
Never an issue- has been an issue in other countries though.
wellyboot97@reddit
The vast majority of people honestly don’t care about stuff like that here. Obviously there will be small pockets who do but the vast majority of people don’t really care.
At least within the white populations. Any time I’ve seen issues with interracial couples here it’s come from immigrant families who don’t like the idea of their second generation kids marrying outside of their race or religion.
GarminArseFinder@reddit
Fine. Unless you are a member of a certain religion, then it’s not so good.
ChuckStone@reddit
Now you mention it... yeah, interracial couples is a thing.
But seriously... nobody gives a flying fuck tbh.
There are certain little racial niggles in the UK - there's a lot of people don't like Muslims for example, but it's the culture they are wary of, and interracial couples negates all that anyway.
But a white person with a black partner? I'd be surprised if anyone even noticed tbh. People barely recognise race unless someone is making it obvious... walking around with their trousers round their arse, and calling everyone "cuz", or pontificating Islamic ideals. Otherwise, nobody cares.
jes_axin@reddit
Is it the guy who is white usually?
AerodynamicHandshake@reddit
Personally, I view them in high definition.
Skinnybet@reddit
A good set of binoculars?
AerodynamicHandshake@reddit
Nah, need something freestanding...
Poo_Poo_La_Foo@reddit
Unrelated to the original question. I am so shocked at how many people are saying class is a relationship divider here. I literally hadn't even thought about this, once. But I guess maybe it is? I mean I date people who are from anywhere, but...maybe if you're not in a big city you just date who is sort of...available? And then settle down and more who do the same...
This has mildly blown my noggin!
Leking9@reddit
Pretty common over here. Some people like a bit of milk and that’s ok (unless you’re Dr Umar)
The_JimJam@reddit
Not a dumb question at all
Everyone will have different experiences, however I feel most won't bat an eye at an interracial couple here.
At least in my experience so far, its never come up as a talking point about a couple, let alone an issue
tillie_jayne@reddit
I’m mixed race and I’m also in a mixed relationship. Nobody gives a shit or has even given me grief but I’m from a city in the Midlands that’s pretty much a melting pot (not Birmingham)
PM_ME_UR_VULVASAUR_@reddit
I'm a white British guy but I lived in America for 2 years. I've dated black women in both countries and the only place I experienced any form of racism towards being an interracial couple was in the US. We were walking through Philly and a group of African American guys were congregating around a doorstep and a few of them started to shout random obscenities at us. The one I remember specifically was along the lines of "When you're done with tiny ass white dick come back here". There was also looks we would get, not all the time, but enough to notice. It wasn't the kind of "eww" look but more a "huh, that's odd".
Meanwhile, in the UK, never experienced any racism for being an interracial couple.
MD564@reddit
I find it funny that some POC will say that the UK is just as bad as America but I've never been ostracised in the UK for dating or sleeping with guys who weren't white, but I definitely did when I went to uni in America and that was near Chicago, a place I considered pretty diverse. I never even heard people use the N word in person before that point.
FuzzyPalpitation-16@reddit
No one gives a shit.. unlike America
BeerisAwesome01@reddit
Most Brits don't care....so you are in an interracial relationship...meh!
Some bigoted fuckwits might moan but they are very much in the minority.
BeerisAwesome01@reddit
Most Brits don't care....so you are in an interracial relationship...meh!
Some bigoted fuckwits might moan but they are very much in the minority.
Significant_Return_2@reddit
The problem is with Americans.
I’m white English and my wife is Sri Lankan Tamil. We don’t usually face any problems, most people in the UK (and Canada) don’t have a problem with us, they think it’s normal.
We went to New York for new year a few years ago. A lot of people didn’t want to talk to us. Some people abused us. A few came up to us and congratulated us on “being diverse”.
The fact that they even commented on it was a surprise. It seems that the only people who have an issue with it are Americans.
We’ve been to over 30 countries and this was the only one where they didn’t accept us as being normal.
Having said that, my wife has faced some racism, but far less in any other country than the US.
Sea-Metal76@reddit
The sooner we get on and get fully homogenised, the better.
SlothsNeverGetIll@reddit
Most people don't give a shit.
Don't be fooled by the amount of mixed-race couples on TV though. It's almost as if it's become illegal to show a same-race couple!
cdca@reddit
"These days you get arrested and thrown in jail if you say you're English."
shaunster101@reddit
When did they bring this in?
chiefgareth@reddit
We're not as obsessed with the colour of people's skin as Americans are.
Roobismeister@reddit
No one cares
ShotInTheBrum@reddit
Here we just call them couples.
Strong_Roll5639@reddit
I was in one for 5 years and I had quite a bit of shit from his race and not mine. I'm white and he is Pakistani.
ShotInTheBrum@reddit
Here we just call them couples.
ShotInTheBrum@reddit
Here we just call them couples.
tangledseaweed@reddit
I don't think anyone cares. My granddad married my grandmother in the 1940s and they seemed to manage OK (Caribbean / white). His second wife is Iranian and they married in the 70s, again no one cared
Upon thinking about it I went to school with loads of kids of "mixed heritage" like myself and it wasn't something you'd automatically think of or ask about?
tangledseaweed@reddit
Shit actually my primary school best friend's parents were from the same country but were Hindu and Muslim, that's a real mixed marriage 😂
A_britiot_abroad@reddit
I was in an interracial relationship/marriage for 4 years.
Lived in cities and small towns.
Never noticed anything towards us said or unsaid.
Stabwank@reddit
It's generally not an issue, most people would not care.
There will be some religious and racist types that have an issue, but I expect you find people like this in every country.
Jason_kharo@reddit
Such an American thing to say. Jeez.
Salty_Bridge_9110@reddit
Me and my partner never have any issues, people aren’t bothered.
She’s from another country so occasionally where asked how we’ve met but that’s about it.
People don’t care and only care about themselves.
In the uk there isn’t much racism as people simple couldn’t care about the background of others as they focus on there own lives.
BasicBanter@reddit
I’m surprised it’s seen as abnormal
Welshbuilder67@reddit
As a couple
Kind-Photograph2359@reddit
I'd say they're viewed as couples. It's not a surprise that it's different in the states though..
Beneficial-Crow1257@reddit
No one gives a shit
PhilosopherNo2105@reddit
They say no one cares...till there is an advert with that type of couple.
Spax123@reddit
Personally I really couldn't care less about other peoples relationships, which I like to think is the norm here. The world would be a much better place if everyone stopped giving a shit about things that don't matter.
542Archiya124@reddit
“How common”
You live in a big city or something? If you’re visited london, London cannot represent rest of Uk whatsoever.
Go rural and you’ll see very different things. Smaller town/city the less diverse it is.
I know a white guy with a black girl got flame from his white Co-workers for married to a black girl.
I also know a white girl dating an Asian guy got second hand racism.
Go figure.
pineappleshampoo@reddit
This thread: 700 white people saying it isn’t even noticed and nobody cares and racism towards interracial couples doesn’t exist. Jesus Christ I thought we had come further than this.
Vozsco@reddit
If it's normative, i.e. a two British people, then the only people who have an issue are abject racists of which we have a lot of.
If it's something a little bit more unusual, i.e. a person of colour dating a white immigrant, then it gets a little funky with people remarking how they didn't expect it, assuming I'm (I'm brown) the immigrant or just remarks like that.
I really disagree with the rosy view of most of the comments on this thread, there are definitely a lot of racists in the UK who are opposed to interracial couples and specific racial matchings are "weirder" to the average British person than others, i.e. White and East Asian would not get a second look but White and South Asian and people start making visa comments or just start being racist. Maybe that's more to do with racism against those groups than it is with interracial couples generally though
Prestigious_Gap_4025@reddit
I've never had any issues, I'm white and my wife is Sri Lankan.
jenny_quest@reddit
As half of an interracial couple, it's very normal - I'd say about half of my friends are in an interracial relationship. The joke is that we're really uptight and backwards about class rather than race -and I think most of my friends and people I know are dating from within their 'class'.
Potato-starch-eater@reddit
I live in London and it's so very ordinary to see interracial couples and have them in your social circle. I would go so far as to say that it's viewed as commendable in my son's school because the child gets the benefit of two cultures and sometimes, two languages. Absolutely no one makes it their business to find out what is wrong with one of them to have settled for a partner from a different (something I personally witnessed while living in the United States for a few years).
xrhades@reddit
It depends, you'll get a lot of people on here say to you that nobody cares etc etc and for the most part that is true, however where you are from plays part.
In an interracial relationship, majority of the time it would be a black man with white woman.
I am a white male with a black woman, in an area where it's not considered the norm when you think about an interracial couple (we are starting to see more couples our way round though). We do get looks sometimes, we've had a couple of comments in our time, BUT for the most part it's never been an issue.
Relative_Sea3386@reddit
Does this not depend exactly where you are comparing? US is huge. Big city vs village etc.
thedarknewt74@reddit
What a weird question. How are 2 people in love supposed to be viewed?
Boomshrooom@reddit
How are they viewed? Normally on pornhub
Cusinn@reddit
I am white and married to a “woman of colour” (though she would roll her eyes at such a term) and I am - shudder cringe - the father to a “child of colour”…
We never had the anti-miscegenation laws the US did. People don’t care here. I wager most people in the US don’t either; but the online harassment against us has been mostly from Americans of a certain “broad” racial classification. I mean there are reddit communities on here that are very much opposed to our existence.
WiccanPixxie@reddit
Tbh I’d say 95% of people couldn’t give any less of a shit if they tried. There are a small minority who have their opinion, and they’re generally told to fuck off.
Goat_In_My_Tree@reddit
By me on the Internet
megsbog1@reddit
99% of the time you would just be viewed as a regular couple probably won’t even look in your direction
SomeRannndomGuy@reddit
Nobody cares, and the concept is not very useful any more as you have "interracial" couples who are both very British and don't have cultural differences, then couples of the same race where only one is British who do. Then you also have lots of Brits whose parents are an Interacial couple - do they count as being part of one themselves if their partner is the same race as one of their parents? Easier not to care.
Ordinary-Break2327@reddit
It's law to have mixed race couples in TV ads.
UncleSnowstorm@reddit
White man with a black wife; the only people who've ever reacted negatively have been black American men. In a shop in Auckland a black American man said "come on baby don't sell us out" as if my British-african wife owes anything to an American man.
We've travelled in lots of countries throughout Europe, Asia, Africa, Australasia and North America and only had comments from Americans.
TheToyGirl@reddit
Although I was married to a SE Asian man, and that meant I got some weird looks or questions but mainly because the 'norm' is supposed to be White guy and SE Asian woman. That was odd to me tbh..but only happened when moved to South West England. London...not an eyelid batted lol
Jolly_Constant_4913@reddit
Pretty acceptable, and I think things have become much more normalised in the last 15 years. I wouldn't say it was necessarily racism before but I did notice working class people tended to only marry in their own. Nowadays I think some are worried if their associate married a Muslim but things have changed a lot. Muslims are not third generation and there's enough give and take to make it work.
westy1980@reddit
I wouldn't even think that there was anything to think about. I mean, it's just absolutely normal.
DodgyDiagnosis@reddit
No-one cares. But interracial couples are far less common than TV adverts would have us believe.
If they were to be believed, black men with good jobs only marry white women.
jurwell@reddit
I’m going to put a slightly dissenting voice in here. I live in a HEAVILY majority white area, which does have a lot of immigration but mostly Eastern European. My parents (early 60s) are STILL very much in the mentality where somebody’s race is worth mentioning as a trait. For example if they have a black doctor, they will say something like “I saw this doctor, she was black but very nice…”
My cousin married a Chinese girl and they adore her, but the fact that she’s Chinese, and their newborn son is mixed race is a conversation piece. Maybe because for our family and our area of the world, this is unusual. They don’t dislike it as much as it’s a novelty, I guess.
While I’d say they have slightly old fashioned and, to some extent racist attitudes, I think anyone associated with me would always be qualified in their minds as “one of the good ones”.
EyesFor1@reddit
No one cares
Key-Moments@reddit
The significant majority of TV adverts showing families tend to show interracial couples and their joint children, or blended interracial families, with their step kids all living harmoniously.
It's not a thing to think about.
There was a poster above talking about the English / Welsh mix. Get more stick for that I think.
This is my perception and experience.
However, I have quite a few contemporaneous age-wise brown friends. Their parents and older family members are much more against it, but that appears to be (when it's been discussed) more an inter-religeon concern. But I could be wrong.
Honor killings are sadly still a thing. So, not all as perhaps harmoniously blended as my personal experience would make me think.
Justha-Tip@reddit
Nobody cares. 20 years ago my grandparents might have expressed surprise if I'dve brought a non-white guy home. But they'dve been nice to his face and then described him as 'that nice coloured bloke my granddaughter brought home'.. until we got married, then he'd probably be allowed an actual name again. I do come from an area with barely any non-white people though. I didn't meet my first black person until I was 12... In general though, as an adult, I've never heard a single remark about mixed relationships. I don't think people even notice any more. It's as common as being in a same-race relationship.
Penny87x@reddit
Never known it to be an issue.
TheToyGirl@reddit
I didn't even think of it as weird tbh. It's the person that is attractive..regardless of race, ethnicity or culture imo.
candiebandit@reddit
I’ve never even heard the phrase “interracial” before. Utterly usual, in answer to your question
scooba_dude@reddit
I'm one half of one and no problems at all! Kinda strange to ask but I get it, you're American. I'm in Manchester so it's quite a metropolitan city. Obviously if you go out to the country with all the old boys then there may be a few things said but nothing done. I guess it helps that I'm a relatively large gent (6"2 and 105kg rugby build)
xerker@reddit
Racism is sort of different here than the US.
Sure, there are a lot of similarities, nobody would deny that... But the differences are subtle enough that if I saw an interracial couple it's not even that I wouldn't take a second look, it just wouldn't even come to mind to question it.
Stereo_bfs@reddit
Even in TV commercials, there are no same race couples, only mixed race.
MemoryIndividual@reddit
This is such a weird question. I’m a black girl in a relationship with a white man. Literally nobody cares and I’ve only had foreigners comment on it.
KingJacoPax@reddit
It can be pretty black and white.
qgwheurbwb1i@reddit
It's extremely normal.
As long as the person looking at the couple is not over....maybe 60 years old? Then no one would comment on it. People like my grandparents (in their 80s) would probably be the only type of people to say something. One of my dads ex girlfriends was black, and even though my grandparents would HAVE to say her skin colour when talking about her, they never said anything negative about their relationship or about her. If was just like "my son's girlfriend - she's a black lady - was just saying the other day..." I think the overwhelming majority of us just do not care about skin colour. We are, and have been for a while, a multicultural and diverse country, and many of us grew up with friends of all cultures and religions and skin colours.
neenoonee@reddit
It’s hard for the majority of Americans to understand how little we care about race as a majority in this country.
I’d say the only people who’d pass comment of my husband were a different race to me would be my Auntie in her late 70’s who was brought up in Ireland during the Troubles and so probably didn’t see anyone who wasn’t white and Irish/British till she moved to Liverpool aged 20 and my 99 year old Grandmother (my Gran would comment, but not in an intentionally negative way).
The rest of us (again, in the majority) are accepting of people in whatever way they come.
StarWarsLew@reddit
Most people don’t really care but there are some (especially older folk) that might stare or take a second look. I’m sure my white parents were a bit tentative when I said I was dating a black woman. Asking me questions about her that they wouldn’t ask if she was white
Mundane_Pin6095@reddit
Some of these comments are straight up gaslighting. As a black brit who had a white missus. You do get glances here and there. You can also run into issues if your parents are not keen on it like her step dad was lol
Sterotypes and fetish aspects can come into it and thats regardless if its black men/ white women or white man/ asian woman.
For instance i know asian( bengali) who got with a black guy and her family disowned her. Savage i know but they laid down the ultimatum. There still together ( 10 years ) and have a child now.
In general though people rarely give a crap but i think it depends on the area.
LightPitiful@reddit
I do feel like we as British people try to act so unproblematic when we are problematic 😅. Come on - I know it’s 2024 but you definitely do get looks and opinions. I’ve experienced it and even my closest friends were surprised that I was (am) with a white man.
Antique-reynard@reddit
if you watch any tv advert over here, you'd think every couple was. (not actually the case outside London but no one cares about MR pairings any more)
ctesibius@reddit
We are more likely to notice if one of the couple is foreign (eg American), though it depends strongly on the area, social class, and age of the person. Reddit is biased young, left, and city-based so is not entirely representative.
“Race” isn’t perceived in quite the same way as in the USA: there’s no single “African-British” category, but we would tend to describe someone as “West Indian”, or “Nigerian” - ie where they (not their parents) are born. “Chinese” on the other hand covers people from mainland China, Hong Kong, Taiwan, and often nth generation immigrants from other countries. Race tends to be in the same category as country of origin - hence “American” is a division broadly similar to “Indian” rather than being a different categorisation.
As far as marriages go, in some countries (Scotland, Northern Ireland), a “mixed marriage” refers to religion (Protestant/Catholic). There’s an old joke: what’s the definition of a mixed marriage in the Highlands? She was Presbyterian and he was “Sunday opening”. It may lose a little in the translation.
lebannax@reddit
It’s because British people don’t obsess about race all the time like Americans do lol
We care so little we don’t even say ‘inter racial couple’ - it’s just a couple
SnooHamsters5480@reddit
I’m in a mixed race marriage and not one person has ever made a comment about it. It’s becoming much more normalized, there are many mixed race children in my daughters class at school so it’s quite unremarkable,
Zyfron@reddit
Same here - from the UK side I've never had anything said other than compliments on my partner although when we've visited her home country (Poland) there have been comments about how the British guys are "stealing all our good women".
Now that I come to think of it, most of my British friends are also in relationships with non British partners of some sort. I've never really given it much notice before at all as it's never really been a thing? At least where I'm from.
Thesleepingpillow123@reddit
Well my parents are an interracial couple and it's a mixed bag in my experience. When I was at school it was something that was pointed out to me too often and made me very uncomfortable because of how much it was bought up. So it wasn't positive in that regard, cus I basically got racist comments. Outside of that though nothing major, people day to day don't mention it.
Willing_Ad_375@reddit
No one cares here. We’re not America. Just learn the phrase ‘Britain is not America’ and repeat it. Ad nauseum.
kenwray@reddit
Like most have said, the term interracial couple doesn't get used over here. We are just couples.
Guess its only used if you're searching for specific porn.
MrJoffery@reddit
Nobody cares. Barely even registers.
aaarry@reddit
Usually with your eyes.
We aren’t yanks, we don’t care.
ConsistentMajor3011@reddit
Are we really that much better than the US at this? I think it’s more than black/white relations are more tense over the pond, for obvious historical reasons
Top_Experience_7590@reddit
bad like anywhere on earth because it usually ends bad
Piptoporus@reddit
Most Brits don't care who you are in a relationship with. Know why? Because our stereotype is that we don't like anyone. All happy couples are viewed with the same level of contempt if they display their happiness publicly.
ConsiderablyMediocre@reddit
A small minority of elderly people (from all backgrounds) might get funny about it. I briefly dated a girl of Indian background for a few months not too long ago. Her grandparents and my (white) grandparents were a bit funny about it, but nobody our age nor our parents could give less of a shit. Basically Gen X and younger, you'll be hard pressed to find anybody who even looks twice at an interracial couple.
Racism is very much real and alive in the UK, but it's much more subtle and more focused than in other countries. Our flavour of racism tends to be more institutionalised (systems and institutions quietly discriminating against minorities) rather than surface level and obvious (people yelling at interracial couples on the street).
H16HP01N7@reddit
What a weird question...
Why do you think we care about other people's relationships like that? You Americans are so obsessed by skin colour.
Love who you love. I don't care what race, gender, sexuality, whatever.
Past_Market2763@reddit
Black and white, night and Day, every other mix come what May x
SuperrVillain85@reddit
My experience (I'm brown my wife is white) it depends where you go.
By and large people don't bat and eyelid.
The two places where I've had people staring at us when we were holding hands were Torquay and York.
JPK12794@reddit
It's to the point I just realised that some couples I know are interracial couples and I've only just realised. It's not really something I've ever thought about.
Shellrant42day@reddit
I’ve been married to my husband for 22 years, the only times we have ever had any comments or negativity regarding us being “an interracial couple” is from Americans. A few times when we have been on holiday in Jamaica. On one occasion, We were told we should “know our place as an interracial couple” because we wouldn’t give our sun-loungers up that we had been sitting on all morning ,for a loud mouthed southern woman who wanted to get her snot nosed kid out of the sun. I suggested she should get up early, like we do, if she wanted a nice spot and just because she had children,it didn’t give her any entitlement to move us. (This was after she screamed at us for keeping shade from her baby,called my husband the N word and told us we should know our place). The other times were when we visited the US. In New Orleans and San Francisco my husband was rather rudely asked what he was doing with that white woman? Their attitude did change when they heard our English accents, but it’s hard to be friendly to people who have just insulted you. A blk police officer in Memphis was super friendly to my father and me as we came out of the airport and even got us a taxi,however as soon as my husband came over that changed. He became extremely rude, said to my husband, what do you want boy? My hubby said I’ve come to find my wife and Father in law. The copper looked so shocked and asked my dad “is he your son in law?” My Dad said “ yes, this is my daughter’s husband who we were waiting for”. “Well folks don’t go for that kind of thing here” he said. I said “what do you mean please? He replied “Mixin, you better be careful”. With that he walked off! At home in the UK I’ve never had a problem, we haven’t in other countries either. I don’t know why it’s a problem for some in the US, those were just a few of the encounters we’ve had over the years, there are many more sadly. We no longer visit the US (we went because my Dad liked to go) but we still encounter Americans and their inappropriate comments that you don’t ask for every time we go to Jamaica. Thank heaven for headphones.
scottjanderson@reddit
No one gives a shit.
JimmyBallocks@reddit
It’s not much of a thing here. It’s a far less racially divisive society than the US. The vast majority of people wouldn’t bat an eyelid, and the only ones that would are the wankers.
youreatwat174@reddit
If tv ads are anything to go by black women don't get with white men only black men with white women
Lovesahappyending93@reddit
Just like any other couples, it’s very common and no-one gives a second thought
walshamboy@reddit
Been in a couple of long term interracial relationships whilst living in big cities (London & Leeds) the only time there has been issues was from south Asian people whilst living in London, who didn't approve of a south Asian girl going out with a white guy (me).
The only really bad time was whilst walking past a halal butchers and the butcher waved his meat cleaver at us from a distance and shouted "Hellfire, hellfire, hellfire!" at us
AdhesivenessNo6288@reddit
I think this is the first time I've realised I'm in an 'interracial relationship' and we've been together 10 years, married nearly 1 😆
tenaji9@reddit
Odd question. Base rules in place inc consent ,capacity etc there endeth my concern as to who loves who. It is not as bad for unorthodox couples as it was fifty years ago.
Parsnipnose3000@reddit
I'm 57 years old and lived for 20 of those in the USA (PNW) and the rest in the UK. It's definitely more common and more accepted here in the UK. Very few people even give it a second thought, and those that do would generally be considered racist.
My brother married a mixed race lady and none of them seem to care at all that he's ginger.
Vast-Faithlessness85@reddit
Interracial couples are just seen as couples. We don't segregate based on ethnicity in the UK so it is completely normal for people of different ethnicities to date and have families. Even with American media doing it's best to divide people.
jemappellelara@reddit
It is so normalised that unless you live in some isolating rural shire, you have probably encountered a mixed race person in your life, if not in your degree of separation.
Overall_Telephone871@reddit
As a mixed race person who’s been attacked since I was 4 lots of people have Issues with people mixing. My current neighbour has been screaming racial abuse threatened to kill all of us of my mixed heritage men women and children. Today I had an Accelerant dumped on my drive and they have been brandishing power tools on my property. I have been jumped multiple times and I get told to go back to where I am from (I was born here).
The UK is more racist than ever
mmmmaaaannnnddddyyyy@reddit
It’s normal. I went on holiday to America at age 17 and had a holiday romance with a black guy (same age). We got so many stares just walking round holding hands. People who were white and people who were black were staring. All ages too. I was so shocked as even though I was from a predominantly white area of the UK, I didn’t see it as an issue at all.
Wiseard39@reddit
No one in the UK cares. As long as someone loves each other.
Colourbomber@reddit
A little insight to being born in England, I was born in 1980.
Im 44 years old, when I started school in inner city Birmingham..... So like 1984, it was already a melting pot of cultures even back then. I'd say roughly 70% was white and mixed race, a mixture of mostly English but had a few Irish kids as well and the other 30% was a mixture of African, carribean, Indian, Pakistani, Bangledeshi, Chinese and Korean, even had a kid from. Zanzibar, and then reading further into that we had Christians, Catholics, Muslims, Sikhs, Rastafarians and Hindu's....id say most brits on here who live in or around a major city will have experienced similar and nowadays probably more so.
One of my bosses is 63 and is mixed race, white mom, Black Dad.....so it's by no means started in the 80s either.
It's just normal, but that's not to say we don't experience racism still, I personally only see personalities in people as I grew up with people from other countries/races from the word go, it was always very normal for me to be going to Pakistani kids houses and eating curry and playing cricket, and black kids houses after school a having kettle drum bbqs listening to reggae and watching some rock the steel drums in the summer in the garden... My cousin is white and is a steel drum musician for example.
So whilst I most certainly have a type, I've most definitely come across that type in pretty much every race imagineable and I'd say that's the same for most white or native brit.
Im not sure it would be considered interracial. But I've been with a Polish Woman for 13 years people are just people and I personally love that we have a choice....... Variety is the spice of life as they say!
LightPitiful@reddit
Hmm depends ! I would say it’s varied. It’s not a big deal here but tbh I don’t have many interracial couple friends despite having a very diverse group (I’m East African.) Some of my friends were surprised that I ended up in an interracial relationship but tbh people in my culture are only now starting to date outside of it.
I do think it’s becoming less of a ‘wow that’s crazy’ kind of thing and more normalised in the past few years.
LivelyUnicorn@reddit
Not sure about the rest of the country (I’m north west England) but where I’m from, people don’t care or look at your skin colour or who you’re fucking… racism still goes on a fair bit in other parts of the county I imagine - from mindless twats who don’t know any better, and others who scream racism to cover up the crimes they commit - google Chris Kaba
Zealousideal-Wash904@reddit
It’s pretty normal to the extent that it was only after I read about half of the comments that I remembered that I’m in an inter-racial relationship. My girlfriend is Asian but she was adopted by an English white couple and was not raised with any Asian culture aspects, so I kind of forgot about her as she’s very English. I have witnessed racism against her in person which was pretty shocking and she has definitely received worse when on her own.
YouSayWotNow@reddit
Gosh, I'm kind of surprised to even hear this question.
I've been in an interracial marriage for decades and it wasn't unusual when we got together either.
That's not to say racism is dead in the UK. Or absolutely isn't.
But dating and marrying outside your own is not unusual. It's only looked down on by fundamentalists (and that covers all colours / religious backgrounds).
Badlydressedgirl@reddit
Didn’t even occur to me that I’m in an interracial relationship until I read this post. So are my parents, and my sister, and my brother 😂
iambigmen@reddit
The only time anyone has made a comment has been older men in dingy pubs saying things like "I ain't got a problem with you two being together, mind. Don't worry about that, mate." Or saying stuff like, "my nephew's with a black girl, so don't worry about it." I wasn't.
The most bizarre one was an older white guy saying this sort of thing to both of us together, while me and him were pretty much the only white people in the entire pub. Like, they're about to give us a cup of pepper soup, and you can get curry goat with rice and peas from the bar when the kitchen's open, I don’t think it matters in here, you strange old man.
Otherwise, no one cares. We used to go on holiday to Spain and get stared at open-mouthed by Russian tourists on the Costa Blanca, but even that experience has changed over the past decade and a half.
charlotterose23@reddit
I've lived in places where it's predominantly white people and places which seem to have every ethnicity under the sun and I greatly prefer the latter. I love seeing a mix of people and I don't blink an eye at seeing interracial couples. I have more of an issue with people trying to dictate who someone can or can't love just.
Evening-Web-3038@reddit
I think it depends on where you are referring to, but generally in either a leafy village or a large city you'll find next to no racism etc if you are an interracial couple. More so in the more affluent areas.
The main areas where I suspect you might occasionally get grief are;
Really secluded areas. Think some "village" in Wales which comprises of 5 houses (one being a pub as well) and 1 shop. If they have 1 or 2 knuckledragging families then you'll get shit.
Really bad council estates with knuckle draggers who don't have one braincell between them.
Ethnic regions of cities, where the population is like 80% muslim etc. I wouldn't feel comfortable, as a white person, dating someone from that background and walking around together in the area.
Valuable_Belt_4387@reddit
it’s wayyyy more common than you would think
AdmirableCost5692@reddit
it's completely normal.
Opening_Major9389@reddit
Hi, online. You are definitely overestimating the diversity tolerance in the UK.
(((interracial couples)))
are viewed EXTREMELY negatively here and you should feel bad for even broaching the subject. Expect a visit from the police and to watching your teeth scatter all over the pavement.
mackerel_slapper@reddit
Never give it a second thought. I had to stop and think through people I know to even realise. Except the bloke over the road who married an American.
Opening-Worker-3075@reddit
I don't think anyone cares
Recent-Setting-4551@reddit
My sister is in an interracial marriage. A few months back we were having a catch up, her husband popped in and this woman could not take her eyes off them, to a point where it was starting to get uncomfortable. My husband asked her if she was ok & it turns out she was trying to figure out where she knew my sister from. (My sister was on an advert for our local gym). Then this woman realised we thought she was being racist and actually rang her (mixed) husband via FaceTime to prove to us that it didn’t matter!! We’d assumed wrongly and we were all embarrassed!
GymAndIcedCoffee@reddit
Seems odd to ask tbh. I don't think anyone, except perhaps the very elderly, would think it strange.
ginger_lucy@reddit
I think it’s common and unremarkable in our society in general. Our TV shows (including the biggest soap operas) have interracial couples all the time and it’s not a plot point, which I feel like it often is on American shows. It’s just normal.
Whether or not there’s racism about it on the individual level is another question. My family wouldn’t think to comment on it if they saw a couple on TV, but if I brought someone of a different ethnicity home I’m sure I wouldn’t hear the end of it. It might not even be bad, but it would certainly be an endless topic of awkward conversation, they wouldn’t be able to just ignore it.
Forceptz@reddit
No issue unless you go to some really run down places. Hope you have a good stay.
SnooMaps6269@reddit
In the UK there is more of an issue with class rather than race. Although Europe is very racist towards travllers.
spizzlemeister@reddit
I’m in Scotland and when I was dating someone who wasn’t white I didn’t think of what other people thought even once. No one said anything racist. Really strange to see this question on here. Quite sad
TravelGirl1234567@reddit
I’m white, partner is Indian. Never had any issues and no one cares.
nitenite79@reddit
I’m in an interracial marriage and live in the south east of England. People see me (American born Filipino) and my Glaswegian husband and no one seems to care. If we went somewhere more rural my husband does get weird questions like does she (meaning me) speak English.
Milky_Finger@reddit
I'm gonna play devil's advocate. Despite a lot of people in this thread being very progressive, the perception that most people have on a white woman + black man couple depends a lot on how they look. If they look put together and attractive, then they're the envy of everyone because you know they're the whole package. On the other hand, if they don't, then UK people are very quick to judge.
Nerreize@reddit
Literally no one fucking cares.
Nozza-D@reddit
As someone who lives in a city, there are many cross cultural as well as interracial marriages around, and it's normal. I don't think I'd look twice if I saw an interracial couple.
JohnLennonsNotDead@reddit
It’s just a non issue, wouldn’t be a second thought given. It’s as normal as marrying your own race (UK).
Ok-Fox1262@reddit
Thirty years ago when I met my wife we were a little unusual. But in urban areas we didn't draw too much attention. In rural areas it was more curiosity than animosity. We were a bit careful where we went to the pub because we expected, not trouble, but to feel uncomfortable in some of the rougher pubs. Of course gay friendly pubs were always fine.
Over the years it's got more common and accepted. And by the turn of the millennium nobody thought twice about me being out with small African children. I got the occasional question but nothing nasty.
And the thing we've noticed is that of the discouraging comments we did get, most of them were from younger black people.
The thing is that we've never had segregation. That's still pretty historically recent over the pond and attitudes take time to change.
Wacko_66@reddit
The fact you’re asking this says more about the US than the UK
cultofcargo@reddit
Like any other couple
Beautiful-Skill-5921@reddit
"Over here, for the most part, people like to couple up with those like them. Which I can understand. But they tend to judge you or question you (a bit too much, in my experience) if you're interested in someone outside of your culture or race"
I reckon in the UK we would see a Brit of a different skin colour as someone of our own culture, nationality etc.
rocketchef@reddit
In Europe (in general), people don't attribute quite so much of their identity to race and heritage.
For example (based on my experience), in the US, someone of Irish origin will say "I'm Irish". Someone in the UK of Irish heritage would *never* say that.
So boundaries between groups, and the racism that sometimes comes with it, aren't quite as much on people's minds every day. That's not to say those boundaries aren't there, or there isn't insidious implicit and explicit racism - it's just not quite at the forefront of daily life as much as it is in the US.
Wonderful_Formal_804@reddit
It's not an issue in the UK, apart from some obvious loonies.
Bignozen@reddit
Personally I couldn't give a toss about colour. All I want from society is peace, no hassle, and people working, not sponging.
clockwork_cookie@reddit
This, and many issues made big in the media tend to be met by apathy with a side order of not giving a toss.
MeanCustardCreme@reddit
I'm in one and it doesn't cross ours or anyone else's mind as far as I'm aware. Maybe it would stand out more outside of London and the more north you go, but if it did it would be expected since in some parts the % of say, non-white is quite small, particularly the older generation. However I don't think it would be an issue, more of a curiosity since it is less common.
Regular_Frosting5340@reddit
I've only really noticed people's curiosity since having children (I'm white husband is brown), where some people want to know where my husband's from having seen my kids 😂
anchoredwunderlust@reddit
People don’t really call it that. Mixed family maybe. It’s not that there can’t be cultural issues, or that a white mum will understand their Black mixed child’s life experiences but it’s a pretty normal thing and I didn’t really grow up considering any differences at all.
If anything, due to demographics and overrepresentation in certain ways, you’ll find racists more up in arms about showing a full Black family or show (thus switching the % of demographics on TV vs what people outside of London are used to seeing) than they do a mixed couple, because the norm is probably more tokenising because a lot of people in the uk grow up knowing a few poc most of which have a largely white friends group, so the view of what integrated society looks like often reflects that. You put a whole Muslim family on tv and they start making conspiracy theories up that they’re being put on the tv to normalise it to their children or some shit but mixed romantic relationships and family’s are rarely an issue except for hardcore white supremacists who are anti race mixing and they are far from the majority even amongst racists.
We didn’t have the same deep official segregation of the US. The ideals are usually about people living by alongside each other and fitting in to British culture (there are as many racists who tell a Black guy they have to identify as English and support the English team first as there are racists who tell them they can’t be British let alone English. Racists here will confuse a person lol)
I met a guy who didn’t agree with race mixing once. By which I mean he walked after me in Romford calling me a cunt and followed me to a bus stop where I just had a conversation with him in which he eventually told me his life story in which his daughter has mixed race grandchildren (to an Indian bloke) who he loves and misses but itnt allowed to see… and I mean other than tiny groups of outright nazis, that’s the type of nonsensical person who is against interracial relationship here.
tobotic@reddit
The UK is majority white, so just by pure numbers the majority of couples are going to be two white people. But mixed race couples are certainly not considered unusual, and except for a handful of racists, most people wouldn't even comment on it.
Grouchy_Shallot50@reddit
Mixed race couples are not so common but disproportionately overrepresented in media and advertisement which skews people's perception, the average Joe is not any good at estimating demographics generally. People are very likely to date their own ethnicity, regardless of the country being largely white. I'm not disputing that it's prevalent in cities mind you, or becoming more common, but it's perhaps less so than some people think - and a very large amount of interracial couples are between White Britons and people of other white ethnicities like Irish.
https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/culturalidentity/ethnicity/bulletins/ethnicgroupenglandandwales/census2021#ethnic-groups-within-households
https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/marriagecohabitationandcivilpartnerships/articles/whatdoesthe2011censustellusaboutinterethnicrelationships/2014-07-03
Gilldadab@reddit
It's so normal that even reading the question was strange to me.
I don't usually think of the UK as being especially progressive but I guess it must be.
CantankerousRabbit@reddit
I would like to think most people don’t give a shit as long as they’re happy
randomscot21@reddit
The only issue is that because you are a bit unique people remember you. Helpful in most cases !
AlyxDaSlayer@reddit
Nobody cares what colour skin you and your partner has.
Flat_Fault_7802@reddit
It's normal. But not as prevelant as the TV ads and media would have you believe.
panicattackcity91@reddit
Put it this way, I seen the title read the comments and had a think I don’t think anything it’s just another couple
mikolv2@reddit
You're doing the classic American thing of batching EU countries together. In the UK, it's perfectly normal and no one would think twice about it. That's not the case in a lot of EU countries. It depends a lot on the country. France is very diverse so probably has similar views to the UK but if you go further east to places like Poland or Hungary, you wouldn't be seen so favourably there.
LeGarconRouge@reddit
We don’t tend to ‘view it’ at all, you might get some religious weirdos such as the Exclusive Brethren who don’t like it, but well over 95% of Brits would genuinely not even consider it to be a thing. It’s not to say that we’re a perfectly accepting society yet, but to my knowledge we never had ‘anti-miscegenation’ laws or court cases such as Loving.
Zack_Knifed@reddit
American here.
Moved to the UK from Baltimore 3 years ago. Although MD was diverse and not much racial tension, in the UK it’s such a breath of fresh air- people just don’t see you as any different. Interracial or inter cultural dating is actually so much more common and younger people seem to be into it as there is an excitement about learning the other culture. I’m half brown by heritage, met a Mancunian girl and never leaving now 😅
King_Kai_The_First@reddit
I think it would be rare that people here even mentally register it
TabularConferta@reddit
30+ years ago, some people may have given stick. My folks got some shit for it. Now a days in cities it will likely not be mentioned. Rural areas, I can't comment.
That said I could just be in my own bubble.
spacetimebear@reddit
Depends on where you are. Cities? No one probably bats an eyelid. Out in Little Britain? Might be some clowns with a problem.
Competitive_Art_4480@reddit
I don't know. I live in a place that was 99% British growing up. Even now it's probably only a few percent non British, half eastern European and half non European.
Certainly were vestiges of racism while I was growing up. Not really any hatred but the language used wasn't great. Certainly not accepted now though.
ADM_ShadowStalker@reddit
A number of friends growing up were from mixed race families, literally a non-issue lol
Rialagma@reddit
It's funny how people comment on how unthinkable and weird it is to consider an "interracial couple" when in many places in the UK a catholic+protestant couple could break up entire families.
AdCommercial6714@reddit
if i see a lady with a black guy , i think hello hello hello, someone loves the BBC
invictus2695@reddit
White men are the biggest consumers of Bbc porn lol
AwfullyOddScapegoat@reddit
Made me chuckle
acezoned@reddit
Half the people won't even notice a person's race and the other half won't care
MembershipDelicious4@reddit
America has always been somewhat behind in terms of being a true mixing pot. My grandad used to design cameras for Kodak and would occasionally go to America for work, he once went with my grandma for a bit of a trip, and they visited New Orleans. This must have been 50-60 years ago. They stayed at a hotel just out of town and got a taxi into the main town, stayed late then decided to jump on the bus back to their hotel. They thought it was odd when they got on that there were only black people on the bus. When they got back to the hotel the staff were both perplexed and shocked that they had taken the 'black bus' back and not called for a taxi. But in England everyone took the bus together, that was just normal.
EmpireofAzad@reddit
If people have strong opinions about mixed-race couples they’re in the minority and normally viewed as an outdated viewpoint.
I’ve been in a mixed-race relationship for almost 25 years, and it’s not an issue at all. My wife has some strong opinions about mixed-race couples, but that’s only because she likes to see it.
The_39th_Step@reddit
I’m in a mixed relationship myself. The UK is an outlier even in Europe. We are far more likely to be in mixed relationships and identify as mixed race. Caribbean people here are more likely to be in a relationship with a white British person than another Caribbean person. It’s something we should celebrate. I remember reading something like 10% of relationships in the UK are interracial and I think it’s lovely.
Mr-_-Steve@reddit
The same way as any couple.. The majority wouldn't even give it a passing thought as its not worth the time of day thinking about.
Obviously you will get those few that would have an opinion but you'll get that anywhere we have such a culturally diverse population that its gonna happen, Maybe the main people who do have issues are ones closely tied to the actual couple in the interracial/sex/species relation such as family or friends.
juss100@reddit
In London nobody would bat an eyelid. I'm not sure what the reaction would be in the provinces ... specifically being a couple I suspect nobody would care, but racist people still gonna racist.
Equivalent-Floor-231@reddit
I like in a mostly Rural county. Even here no one cares. The only people who would care would be some minorities. Like an Indian family might want their child to marry another Indian. General society does not care.
No-Preparation-4632@reddit
Put it this way; we don't refer to them as interracial couples
The entire term just sounds racist and just using that term would probably make people feel uncomfortable. It would be weird to point it out and people would just assume you're about to say something racist. It's very much on par with "I'm not racist, but..."
It would just be a normal couple here; it doesn't stand out as anything different or special, nor do I hear people refer to themselves or others as being an "interracial couple". They will say things like my partner is from x country.
Gecko5991@reddit
I've never heard of interracial outside of Americans and American porn.
TsavoTsavo@reddit
Lot of white people responses in the comments, you will get a few dirty looks and maybe the odd disapproving nod. But 99% of people are fine with it.
Hour_Tour@reddit
Just as any other couple.
If you go looking you'll definitely find plenty racial issues here, just as any country, these days mostly concerning migrants from warzones. The UK in general is a lot more concerned about class (working/middle/upper) than race, it was a bit of a shock moving here from Scandinavia.
moosebeast@reddit
I have been in a mixed race couple and it was never brought up by anyone. I mean, don't get me wrong, she as a non-white person did get 'where are you from?' type questions and so on directed at her specifically, but the fact that we were together was never an issue. The only thing I would say is that I maybe noticed the occasional look from people in public, but I can't say for sure that's what it was about.
SMTRodent@reddit
Here the very idea of 'an interracial couple' is weird. It's just a couple. People get together with whoever they want, there's no colour bar.
Individual-Titty780@reddit
No one will care, and in fact it's one of my top searches...
Fuzzy-Explorer3327@reddit
This is not a new thing. It’s bizarre to me that Americans even need to ask this question. Dont get me wrong OP asked and education comes by asking questions . I read about recently American GI’s based in the UK asking British pubs to segregate black and whites and the British literally fighting American white soldiers because we didn’t agree. To a point they banned White GI from coming into pubs and only let Black GI in. Brilliant . Segregation was not banned until 1948 in the US. https://www.independent.co.uk/news/black-ap-us-army-england-rice-b2363429.html
txe4@reddit
The US is divided by race.
The UK is divided by class.
Left-Lingonberry4073@reddit
Nobody even cares
Be-My-Enemy@reddit
As another poster said - so normal, i didn't even initially realise that I'm in one when pondering the question.
rsweb@reddit
Don’t get me wrong the UK has problems with racism but absolutely not on the scale as the US. People keep trying to import US issues here, absolutely no one here cares about mixed couples
Bethbeth35@reddit
Very normal here, my husband is Italian and several of my friends have partners from other countries and ethnicities. Feels a bit like in the states heritage is a bit more of a priority where people define themselves as Italian, Irish, Dominican etc even if they're born in the states, or even if their families have been in the states for several generations. Maybe more of a norm to date amongst people of the same heritage?
EchoVolt@reddit
It's so normal that it's not really something that most people would even notice. There are racists, but they're very much on the fringes of debate and mostly in a bubble on X.
SnooCauliflowers2264@reddit
Interracial doesn’t really have a scientific meaning .
There is only one race. The human race.
There used to be 2 races when the Neanderthals were around , but they are gone.
Humans descend from a bunch of Africans who colonised Europe and Asia as recently as 40k years ago.
The human race are surprisingly inbred compared to other animals, all humans are very similar
-Free-Soul-@reddit
People barely even notice it here and definitely wouldnt judge you for it (in London anyway). I am a white male and all of my LTRs have been with black or mixed race females, same with my sisters. However some ethnic combinations are still quite rare in the UK, mainly down to cultural or religious beliefs and those may receive more scrutiny from the general public.
Silver-Appointment77@reddit
Racism isnt as bad here as America. Ive always found America to be weird about a black person married to a white as if it wasnt allowed, or dirty. Frown on sort of thing
Over here we just find someone good looking and go for it. Regardless of colour or race. If theyre hot grab their number if theyre injterested. Some people will stilll find it weird, but not the way Americans do.
FriendlyGoomba@reddit
Small town here, with a significant population of Asians, mostly Chinese, for the universities. My wife is Japanese, though everyone assumes she is Chinese, and I am white but not British, and to be honest I feel like we get a lot of stares if we walk down the street holding hands.
It never seems to be anything malicious though. Maybe just looks of curiosity or maybe some judgement of a white guy having "yellow fever" or something. I met her when I lived in Japan and I know that it's a common judgement to make when seeing a white/asian couple so it doesn't bother me. The few times we have struck up with conversations with strangers they always ask about how we met but it seems to be out of curiosity and not anything with ill intent so I would say it's fine.
When we go to big cities it's non-existent.
pikantnasuka@reddit
The UK is far more divided by class than by race.
shinneui@reddit
White woman married to an east Asian guy. Nobody cares.
AnimatorCommercial53@reddit
As someone in a mixed relationship, whilst it’s common place I actually get really terrible looks and sometimes abuse yelled at me and my black girlfriend. It is always from black people, I have even been threatened and harassed on the street about it. I live in London btw not in the sticks. It is generally accepted far more here but the only difference I can tell between here and US is that white folks would also give us looks
elalmohada26@reddit
Your comment of “someone like them” is striking.
I think we’re more likely to consider people as “like us” based on things like shared interests and outlook on life rather than race.
Eliza10-2020@reddit
Despite what the MSM and leftist propaganda would like you to believe, most in the UK are not racist, and just see people as people rather than their race or skin colour.
Peter_gggg@reddit
My wife is from Cumbria. Does that count?
photoOomph@reddit
I find it mind boggling that someone from such an in theory “developed country” has had to ask this question…I don’t think I’ve ever had this thought crossed my mind before now
tinabelcher182@reddit
I am British, and white, but I haven't dated a white person seriously for about... 12 years. My last 3 serious relationships have all been with non-white, and non-British/non-British-born people (but not strictly the same race as one another, although all ethnically from the same continent).
I've never received any negativity for being in a mixed-race relationship, although I do have family members who are racist/say racist things/have racist opinions, they've never treated me or my partners with racism itself (but I still call them out on their views, not least because it's hypocritical, but also... they suck).
I do find that everyone assumes my partner will be white if I'm ever talking about them. I remember once at work, I was stationed in a shopping mall that happened to be right outside the store my then-partner worked in. My ex and a colleague were stood in the doorway of their store, so I said my colleague "oh, look my partner is over there" and they asked which one it was and I said "The one on the right," and they made a sort of shocked noise at realising it wasn't the white person.
I come from a very, very white part of the country (no where near a city), and it does always feel a little strange bringing non-white partners back to my home village, but they've never received negativity in being here or being with me. I've never felt unsafe by being out and about with a non-white partner (and I've asked them all before and the majority opinion is that they also do not feel unsafe or judged).
It's funny that because of my dating history, I have gained myself a silly reputation/stereotype though. It isn't that I go out of my way to date a certain demographic, though. I don't particularly find white men sexually attractive, but that's not to say none of them are or that I wouldn't date a person of my same ethnicity.
MerryWalrus@reddit
Here's what I think when I see an interracial couple: "damn they will have beautiful children"
Honestly, it's the genetic pick'n'mix
plasticface2@reddit
Most people don't care.
Own_Art_2465@reddit
It was quite common all the way back in the 1700s Indian raj to see British men in relationships with different ethnicity locals. Not having heinous shit like the klan in the UK obviously have meant its less dangerous for mixed race couples to be out in the open, and the church has had much less of an influence also
taoofdavid@reddit
We just don't care. It isn't an issue.
Live-Negotiation3743@reddit
I’ll comment as a black woman living in a big city. Everyone says that no one cares or notices but I would say that sometimes it can come as a surprise to people who you work with.
When I’ve been in jobs and showed people my now husband they initially look shocked then when I ask them why they say ‘oh he wasn’t what I expected’. And then some people will ask if I have always gone for white men?? 😂
So generally attitudes are relaxed but if you actually ask people about your relationship when you’re an interracial couple, they will tell you clearly they didn’t expect it.
yocomoquchi@reddit
My wife and I fit that bracket. Seems like a weird question to me which I think leads to the answer of ‘the vast majority of people couldn’t care less’.
On the whole most people here aren’t preoccupied with race. That’s more of an American problem, me thinks.
slightly_OCD@reddit
Midlands here, no one bats an eyelid
nWoSting145@reddit
I’m white British and my wife is Filipina (we met last January and just got married 5 days ago) and we’ve been all around London and other places like Cambridge, Glastonbury and Luton to name a few. Not once in any of those places have we heard any comments, witness any negative reactions or been made to feel bad because of our cultural differences or the differing colours of our skin, it’s become so normal for people from different backgrounds and cultures to be with the ones they love that it’s an non issue. I think that the generational change (meaning the “old school” mentality of British people before I was born in the 90s) have largely been replaced by my generation and beyond where most citizens here are welcoming and nice. That’s not to say everyone older than me harbours that old school mentality, it’s just that I’ve met more that do than older people that don’t.
IamtheOnezee@reddit
I (white British) have married to someone from another ethnic origin for almost 20 years and we were together for ten before that. We never feel noticeable nowadays esp because we are in London so very normal. Occasionally get double take looks when we are on holiday in the countryside but there have never been any actual problems about it even 30 years ago.
When we were younger we used to get a lot of questions mainly because people assumed we had some sweepingly romantic tale of how we got together in a faraway land, but actually we originally knew each other at school so they were always quite disappointed by that!
44scooby@reddit
Yep, weird question to Brit. Not something to get your knickers in a knot about . Translates to panties in a bunch but not as weird for our American friend.
priiizes9091@reddit
Segregation is not a thing here. Race is barely notice too. It’s strange to me you’re even asking this question!
C_beside_the_seaside@reddit
Yeah my family has two different sets of cousins where each grandparent is a different nationality
WasteofMotion@reddit
Mate nobody gives a shit.
Ice t said it best https://youtu.be/KIE6twazt4w?si=Ez4BzZCkWKFRoPHM
Morriganalba@reddit
I'm in the West of Scotland, and when I was growing up 80's/90's, you could (mostly) tell if someone was Catholic or Protestant based on their surname. Irish or Italian names were Catholic, Scottish were probably Protestant. I have a 'Protestant' name because my mum is Catholic, dad is Protestant, and I was brought up Catholic (but have been atheist since before I was a teen).
Sectarianism was and is a huge problem. My parents got married in '76 and my dad was told by multiple people that he had to convert - he didn't - and his family virtually cut him off for marrying a Catholic.
My dad's mother, a nasty auld besom, told me that she would have preferred that he married a black woman than my Fenian mother, I was 10. They'd been married about 18 years at that point.
Race didn't matter but religion did!
I didn't know many people who weren't white. The few I did were all in relationships with white people, and nothing was said about it except to comment that future babies would be adorable.
Especially if there was the chance that they'd have curly hair. That's far more important than the colour of skin.
Best_Judgment_1147@reddit
I never gave them a second look, never known anyone else to have an issue either
spectrumero@reddit
My dad is white and my stepmum is black. No one cares.
When they went to Georgia (USA) (my step sister went to university there) the attitude difference they encountered was jarring.
andyone1000@reddit
The U.K. by and large is pretty tolerant. That’s not to say we don’t have racism, we do, but by most measures we’re a pretty tolerant lot. I think that most Northern European nations are pretty tolerant.😊
PhantomLamb@reddit
Literally no one cares. Would be odd to question it.
paulmclaughlin@reddit
States in the US had a history of anti-miscegenation laws going back a long way. The Nazis used them as the basis of their laws.
Alabama was still enforcing its laws banning mixed race marriages until 1970.
DirtyfingerMLP@reddit
Only interspecies couples are regarded with suspicion.
willcodefordonuts@reddit
I’m a white guy, my wife is black. Never had any problems. It’s such a common thing here no one cares, I have never even thought of it as a possible issue in our 20 year relationship.
Fit-Friend-8939@reddit
if you're interested in someone outside of your culture or race -> isnt it a bit more complex? There are a lot of black / brown people assimilated they are all 'british'. On the other hand even within the UK you may have a different Scottish/Welsh/Irish/Sarf Londoner etc.
ShanePhillips@reddit
Might find the odd ReformUK supporter give you a dirty look, but on the whole it's massively less stigmatised than it is in the US.
asdf0897awyeo89fq23f@reddit
I'm in one. Never notice anything in real life. Notice a lot online from purportedly left-wing people because it's a common pairing for an acceptable target, tech bros.
SpudFire@reddit
Couldn't care less (could care less in your language)
Same race or religion couples are more common but that's just because people's social bubbles are generally made up of people similar to them.
In my experience, everybody apart from the minority of racist fuckwits are very accepting of people with different backgrounds to them and interested in learning more about different cultures. Intolerance makes news headlines, but the majority here are tolerant (although that word is a poor descriptor, we don't 'tolerate' others, we shrug our shoulders because we can't think of a reason why we wouldn't).
Bigbesss@reddit
Race is only an issue for the windows lickers in our society. The general population doesn't care
IcyCoach8716@reddit
Literally nobody cares.
Neo-Riamu@reddit
I have 3 children with 3 different Woman from all different backgrounds.
Look at our history and you can see we have repeatedly integrated and mixed with anything that has come in arms reach of us lmao
One little story about my super racist grandad when his first great grand child was born she was black (My child) her mother is also black(Jamaican) afterward we found out his grandad (my great great grandad?) was black so his racism died down somewhat after that.
Responsible_Oil_5811@reddit
America is obsessed with race to an extent that no other country is. Britain is more obsessed with class.
purrcthrowa@reddit
Exactly. We have a few interracial couples in our village, and no one thinks about it since they all contain people of the equivalent class (mainly professional). If, however, someone married someone from a significantly different social class, irrespective of race, that would raise a few eyebrows.
Responsible_Oil_5811@reddit
It says something about Britain that it’s most famous erotic book is Lady Chatterley’s Lover, in which a repressed aristocratic woman finds sexual and emotional satisfaction with a working class man. One of my favourite examples of English snobbery on the one hand and wit on the other is the exchange between the prosecutor and the publisher at the Lady Chatterly obscenity trial. “Is this a book you would want your wife or servants to read?” “I wouldn’t mind my wife reading it, but I must admit I would be reluctant to give it to my gamekeeper.”
highrouleur@reddit
It really isn't a big thing here.
The only time I've heard anyone comment on an inter racial couple was coming out of a cinema probably 20 years ago. We were behind a black guy with a white girl, suddenly some weirdo popped up alongside us "it's disgusting innit?" "er? what?" "Them" we went in a different direction as quickly as possible.
The most notable thing I can think of about an interracial couple is some random weirdos ignorant comments about them a couple of decades ago
iViEye@reddit
generally it appears less polarised than in the US, but I will add nuance
Within the same socio-economic background there's a lot less friction from what I've seen. With non-racist families, historically poor people being in interracial relationships isn't uncommon.
Sometimes though, especially in areas with more ghettoisation, there can be friction from external family members over who their cousin/daughter/friend is dating. I'd say this is modified by some white-supremacist structures and general xenophobia from some minority groups (this is certainly not universal, but noticeable at times).
There are scenarios where you'll see interracial couples where one person may not be in regular contact with their family due to having to protect themself and partner from bigotry.
Once again, in general, they are viewed mostly as couples, with the same ups and downs as any other couple
E31a5c7d65d792@reddit
Huh, for a moment I forgot that some people may have an issue with it.
Even the far right don't have an issue with it here. Heck, Kemi Badenoch, the most prominent far right person in politics today is a black woman married to a white man.
We simply don't think about it here.
TheDettiEskimo@reddit
Incognito mode for me.
Winged_Diva_850209@reddit
No awkward stares in London, a few curious glances here and there when we travel up north in villages. In general race isn’t really a big deal here as opposed to US I think. I am Southeast Asian and my partner is British.
Thin-Juice-7062@reddit
It depends. I'm black and have lived in Britain and another European country, most young people don't hold bigoted views towards interracial relationships but people aren't as tolerant as some would have you believe in this thread. A lot (not all) of white men hold negative views towards black men dating white women. I've had instances where a partners family member has said if we got married they wouldn't attend due to my race, the last girl I dated said on the first date that her grandfather told her very sternly not to date black men.
Very recently, I was walking down the street with a white friend of mine and a man stared at us for an uncomfortable amount of time before asking me if she was my girlfriend. Racism in Britain is very real, just hidden. Its also worth noting that people hold far more bigoted views towards black man-white woman pairing than another pairings so racism isn't dished out equally and the general demographics of this subreddit.
l1vi@reddit
They don't mind.
great_blue_panda@reddit
No offense, I understand your question, but it is a bit outdated. To me is strange for example that in US you define some citizens as African-American but they probably they have never even been on holiday in the African continent.
Norman_debris@reddit
I can't stress enough how little consideration it would be given.
Even the term "interracial" doesn't really exist here.
Albannach02@reddit
Homo sapiens and, er, shape-shifting lizard people, you mean? (😅) Historically, at least, the language you speak has always meant much more than appearance or skin tone. Any speaker of a native language (Cornish, Scottish Gaelic, Irish, Welsh) can testify to that. Ethnicity counts more than appearance.
SchoolForSedition@reddit
One of my (white) students was concerned at what response her (black, African) husband would get in her rural English village.
The men assumed he was a footballer.
CliffordThRed@reddit
Most of us don't really event notice it tbh I don't think
Lynex_Lineker_Smith@reddit
What is it with Americans being obsessed with racism
_Planemad_@reddit
Mixed couple here - the only comments we get are ‘your children are going to look beautiful’. :)
NotOnYerNelly@reddit
I met a black American girl in Edinburgh and we got on really well. I always felt white people were looking at us and black people from the African nations would say things.
I called it off because of all that and it’s been my biggest regret-the one that got away and it was mostly my fault.
Kirstemis@reddit
The only people who care are racists.
SirGuestWho@reddit
It's normal, you see it everywhere with all sorts of ethnic partnerships.
GavUK@reddit
While the UK still does have issues around racism and more likelihood of worse economic outcomes for (some?) ethnic minorities, generally we are used to seeing couples of mixed ethnicity and a majority of us have no issue about them.
There are always (unfortunately) a minority of people who do though, and of them a small minority who will make a lot of noise about it (note though that the more British thing is not to overtly complain or make a fuss about something that you don't like/are unhappy about). In villages or small towns who may have few, if any, people of other ethnicities there may be more of a reaction to them if they move there or a local starts a relationship with one, but in most towns and cities it's unlikely to even going to get a second glance.
HoneyBadger0706@reddit
Personally, I'm a little taken aback by the question! Nothing wrong with the question at all, nor is it a dumb or ignorant question, it's just that, for me and everyone I know at least it's not something that even enters our heads...which, until right this second, I didn't realise how proud we should be for this as a nation!
Infact, the more I now think about it, the more baffled I am!! Why does anyone, anywhere, think it's any of their business who dates who and for what reason!
Thank-you for giving me something other than what I've been stewing on all day to think about!! My little brain is grateful you to!! 😁
Important-Engine-101@reddit
We see other ethnicities as people.
IsfetLethe@reddit
People don't really notice.
Source: Brit married to a latina
ToothDoctor24@reddit
I found it so weird when I saw Americans had a problem with it. I started noticing how all the couples in popular media were the same colour, even High School Musical. I grew up with BBC where each group of friends is an eclectic racial mix.
Supposedly the immigrant and Muslim communities like mine are supposed to be overly segregated in the UK but there are several inter racial marriages in our family too, and they are looked at favourably.
Artistic_Data9398@reddit
Realistically nobody cares. Interracial relationships are very common in the UK due to our diversity. However, you will only find that in the working class and lower classes. Most middle and upper class tend to not mix.
You have your small extremes too, some black families don't mix. Majority of our Asian community don't mix. but its very normal in the UK to see interracial couple. So normal its weird to even notice it like you did lol
Icy-Astronomer-8202@reddit
It's just two people in a relationship or dating. End of. It doesn't matter
BalthazarOfTheOrions@reddit
People here, too, couple up with those like them. Likeness just isn't necessarily defined by "race" (whatever that means) or culture.
Dramoriga@reddit
Chinese parents but born brit here, with a white English wife. I still get the occasional snide racist comment but negativity against my mixed marriage? Nope. At most, a look of surprise, but then acceptance.
Fantastic-Change-672@reddit
Literally no one cares.
Blue-Moon99@reddit
They are just a couple, 99.9% of people have no issue with it. But...
I am in a mixed relationship. Unfortunately, I (the white one, she's mixed) notice the looks that we get, and it's almost always from black people. She isnt close to the black side of her family and I've only met them a few times, some of the family have white partners, we had a small gathering and I noticed that the grandmother was rude and cold to the white partners but fine with the mixed or black. It was uncomfortable but whatever, the rest of her family didn't care.
When I was younger (about 14 years ago) and with a black girl it was even worse, men would make comments about her being with a 'white boy' and the women would just give nasty looks. Around the same time frame I remember being at my grandmas house and my aunt was saying that she doesnt agree with mixed relationships because the child doesnt know if to be one or the other, we'll, I have a mixed brother so I shut that down quickly.
So, although most of the population doesn't care, there are some out there who are just arseholes.
DoktoroChapelo@reddit
I'm white and UK-born. My spouse is Chinese and came to the UK as a student. It didn't even occur to me until we'd been going out a good few weeks that we were an "interracial couple". In the decade or so we've been together, I don't think we've ever had a single comment about it in the UK from anyone except one or two other Chinese students early on.
My in-laws in China are a different story.
the_immortalcowboy@reddit
Mmmh online?
TheFlyingScotsman60@reddit
Who gives a £uck.
Live and let live as long as you don't try and force your moral, or immoral, values onto me.
burneracc99999999@reddit
We've never had any direct situations however I have heard extended family referring to me as a "Gori". They are very loving with me but just use this word casually. She usually seems quite proud of me as her daughter in law. I don't like this term or the act of referring to someone as a colour. But I forgive.
My husband did get asked if our daughter was his when he took our baby shopping once. The person asking, her intention wasn't malicious. I think she's just young and direct and naïve. It did bother me/us but I forgive.
Spirited_Trouble6412@reddit
Gori means fair-skinned. Not even white. You will find people in South Asia call women of their own race "gori" if they are well... gori or fair skinned. And in all the Bollywood movies you will find songs reffering to women as goriye or gori. It means "fair lady". It doesn't mean someone is calling you a whitey.
Caemeron772@reddit
Interracial couples are always the same height. Even when they are tall they’re the same so I’m wondering if that indicates a mismatch? Maybe if they’re both 5’6” it’s not good for walking about at night or looking over walls etc. I think one needs to be taller at least. Mixed race couples make me think of Berghaus jackets, anything boring or bland.
Consistent-Sea-410@reddit
There are arseholes everywhere, the U.K. isn’t free form racists. However, I can’t imagine you’ll get comment on it from nearly anyone, I don’t think it’s even on the radar for most people.
I’ve heard horror stories from friends in mixed race marriages and suchlike trying to get through airport security in the USA though. So maybe it’s a cultural difference.
BrieflyVerbose@reddit
We don't have this obsession with race like the US does.
CryptographerFit384@reddit
Very normal, I’m even a bit weirded out by the fact you’d ask
seraphimX1@reddit
The British on a whole in my opinion really don’t give a shit about the colour of your skin, it’s the media and governments that use race as a weapon. The British are far more likely to not like you for stepping on their traditions and customs.
Beneficial-Metal-666@reddit
As an average white working class type British nobody I can confirm I give 0 fucks about interracial couples (as in, I am not opposed to them).
Zanki@reddit
Generally no one cares, at least out in public, behind closed doors can be different, or when people think they're "safe". I'm white and my boyfriend is Chinese. My mum would hate him if she knew about him just because he isn't white. Hell, she kicked my ass as a kid when I was six because my first crush was on an Asian man (Adam, Power Rangers). I had no concept of racism and thought I'd been bad for liking a boy. I'm no contact with her, but I'd never let her near him, his family or my friends. She once got mad at me because there was a black and Asian man in a picture from my birthday. I didn't tell her some of the guys were gay, some of them weren't from the UK, because she'd hate them as well.
I think the most looks I get are from old Asian women who don't approve, but that's about it. No one has ever outwardly said anything to me about the whole thing. Worst we've ever had is him being misgendered by a group of idiots who obviously needed glasses because he does not look like a woman at all! He's built like a tank!
I think the funniest incident we had was in Japan, trying to get into a little attraction and the guy operating it kept trying to split me and my boyfriend up because we obviously couldn't be together. It took a lot to convince him we were together! We were amused.
I think if you live in a multi cultural area, no one bats an eye, but other areas can be bad. Where I grew up people were absolutely horrible to none white people. Mostly just avoiding/excluding them, but it could get bad. Hell, red heads were also very hated there, I'm a red head. My mum was very mad when I befriended the only none white girl in my primary school. She'd come over to play after school often. She was nice and I had a friend until she was able to go back home to London. She saw the town for what it was and she was younger than me. Mum tried to prevent the friendship but she couldn't. I was very stubborn.
Peter_Sofa@reddit
I have been in many different relationships with women who are of different ethnicities.
The only time that there was any sort of a very minor issue was when dating an Indian woman when we were out some Indian men would stare a bit too much lol but to be honest they were mostly 'uncles' anyway
Apart from that, nothing at all
In fact I don't think I have heard the phrase interracial couple spoken over here before
entersandmum143@reddit
The majority of people really couldn't care less who you are dating. I don't think the UK has as big of a 'race' fixation as the US seems to.
You may get a few looks in the smaller towns and villages, but most people are more curious than in your face racist.
However, there are idiots everywhere, especially if they've had a few drinks.
Usually a very firm 'fuck off', sends them scuttling away.
Minimum_Leopard_2698@reddit
I think it depends where in the UK you are. I live wayyyyy out in the country and am from a small, working class white town. Anyone of another race are still called “foreigners” and it’s literally a talking point if a foreign couple appear at an agricultural store or workshop.
But this does seem to be exclusive to the older generation (thankfully!).
Family in London and Nottingham however, are an absolute hodgepodge of races and friends are as diverse a group as is probably possible. It’s wonderful and I think in time even the back country may become less white (I’d hope for less stuck up too but I feel that’s off the cards)
G30fff@reddit
four of my best friends are in interracial marriages, which is most of them, three Asian guys and one black guy all with white wives and mixed children. Never been an issue for any of them AFAIK
Meanwhile-in-Paris@reddit
It’s very normal.
So normal that I wondered for a long time why American film never showed mix ethnicity couples. Thanks goodness they finally caught up, it was disturbing!
superkinks@reddit
I don’t think I’ve met anyone who would have a problem with it but I do know of at least one couple who have experienced negative comments from strangers over it. On the whole we’re not as aggressive about it but racism does still exist here
-Blue_Bull-@reddit
Asians care, I dated a Turkish woman and we used to get loads of trouble from Pakistani men who thought she was Pakistani. In some cultures, this is the sort of thing that can get people killed.
DarthKrataa@reddit
As a white man me and my Asian wife are very much against it.
No_Theme_1212@reddit
I don't think I have ever really heard of someone using the term interracial couple other than when discussing racism in America.
ShoshPaddington@reddit
Completely normal. No big deal at all. We’ve moved on a lot in 40 years.
dwair@reddit
I don't think anyone would really notice or care here. A couple is a couple regardless of sex or ethnicity.
Turbulent_Welder_599@reddit
I’m fine with interracial couples, it’s couples that support two different football team I can’t understand
Biglatice@reddit
As a general rule, the states makes race much more a part of someones identity than the UK. I won't say nobody cares because some gammons will but the vast, vast majority couldn't care less. We're a bit of a mongrel nation and always have been so seeing mixed races living, working, in relationships with each other is just normal. Like it should be.
Weird_Influence1964@reddit
Americans are racists would be the reason for that.
cocoaqueen@reddit
I’m south Asian with a White partner. The only grief I’ve had is from other south Asians.
Honey-Badger@reddit
Along with mixed race friendship groups. I'm in NYC once a year or so and find it strange how even in massive cities you guys tend to be really segregated
jugsmacguyver@reddit
Back in the eighties and nineties I used to get funny looks sometimes when i called out for my mum as she's clearly mixed and I look white. My dad is white. My school friends used to ask if I was adopted.
No one bats an eyelid these days. I can't remember the last time I saw someone react. Not even when she's out with her blonde haired grandsons.
mj_bones@reddit
I’ve noticed in the last couple of years you see mixed couples/families on TV adverts whereas you didn’t in the past.
I think that indicates how normal it’s viewed.
100_wasps@reddit
You'd hear more people worrying about backgrounds than ethnicity, like a visibly ethnically mixed relationship but they both grew up in Birmingham? Not much of a conversation. But two white people but one of them is from Russia, I feel like people would ask a lot more nosy questions, especially if the couple has children
thelouisfanclub@reddit
Normal. I'm 35 and mixed race, my parents are still together and never had any major negative experience besides the odd "culture shock" moment that I suppose comes from marrying someone of another culture, regardless of race. I know a lot of other mixed race people, as basically - my Dad came over from Nigeria in the late 70s, he knew a lot of other Nigerian boys at the time, and most of them ended up marrying white girls as... there were just a lot more white girls in England in the 70s than anyone else. And in Nigeria there isn't the same kind of expectation that you have to marry a girl from "home" like there is in some other immigrant communities.
GhostRiders@reddit
The only people who care are racist, xenophobic morons. As for the rest of us, we care so little it wouldn't even cross our minds.
Kesskas@reddit
I'm mixed race (Jamaican & English) and my wife is white (English & Irish), we've been together for 8 years now.
We've never had any overt issues, as I genuinely think most people aren't bothered about it, but I know that there have been instances wherein people have dropped the 'don't mix races' bollocks. Never to my face of course because obviously they're all cowards, but I know it's been said more than once.
Honestly it doesn't bother me though; actually I get enjoyment from the thought of their impotent frustration and anger about people doing things that they've literally always done since people existed.
simonecart@reddit
You should like this in that case.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEjtKHxLl54
jennymayg13@reddit
It’s so normal that I was very confused by your question, we aren’t in the 1950s???
hhfugrr3@reddit
My nephews are mixed race (white and black). Once of them has taken it a step further by marrying a Chinese woman so my great nephews are a mix of black, white, and Chinese! In China the kids got hassle (remember one woman in a hotel looking at the then baby and saying basically, "ahh he's cute but such a shame he's black"). I can't imagine that happening here in the UK.
I can't speak for my nephews experiences of life as mixed race kids, but it's obviously always seemed perfectly normal for me and none of my friends have ever commented on it.
Apidium@reddit
Nobody cares.
Well, largely, I have one racist member of my extended family who was very concerned when another relative married a black man (gasp) who was muslim (gasp!) and went around gossiping to assorted relatives (who did not care to hear her voice anymore) about her concerns about the skin tone of any of their future children as well as what religion they would be raised to believe. She did her best to portray her religious and racial discrimination as simply her being concerned about children who are not yet born.
I was adopted, the same woman considers me to not be a relative of hers. While acting unusually warm towards my sister who was born of my parents and not adopted. She exposed my sister and I to this bias of hers when we were both children and only decided it would be best to at least mostly behave when my mum threatened her physical welfare.
Turns out, sometimes festering piles of shit assume human form and all the rest of us just do our best to contain their stench. This phenomenon is not unique to the UK, I have on good authority that nasty folks exist all around the world.
There are small pockets of folks with all sorts of personal problems with the way other consenting adults decide to legally spend their free time with or without one another but most of the UK simply does not care. There are more important things to care about.
dahid@reddit
I don't think anyone really cares, it's normal nowadays. You might get older pensioner types making comments but that's about it.
Valuable-Wallaby-167@reddit
The UK has never had an active policy of segregation in the same way as the US. So while there's racism, it's not geared towards "stick to your own kind" in the same way. Obviously there'll be people who are bothered by it because there's dickheads everywhere but I'd say even most people who are bothered about things like that will be more fussed about cross-culture relationships than interracial ones.
Nyx_Necrodragon101@reddit
Interracial relationships haven't really been stigmatised since the 90's.
Nobody really cares that much. The only people who do seem to have a problem with it are POC who have self-segrigated.
CalligrapherTop2202@reddit
I've literally never heard another British person use the phrase 'interracial' before, and skin colour here is pretty much a non-issue. We discriminate on other things, like how people dress or what car they drive.
OverlordOfTheBeans@reddit
I personally don't know anyone, nor do I myself, who gives a rats arse who's shagging who. Unless it's noncing, then people care, but otherwise no one cares.
saz2377@reddit
Not interracial couples but if you want to see how american segregation is treated in the UK look up The Battle of Bamber Bridge from the second world war.
The short story is that an american unit stationed in a small village in the north of England tried to ban black soldiers from certain pubs in the village. The village responded by banning the white soldiers. Unfortunately it did erupt one night with shots being fired and a black soldier being killed. The pub it happened outside still has the bullet holes in the wall.
The start though shows how even in the 30s/40s the UK had less tolerance for segregation/racism than america did.
Agnesperdita@reddit
My son-in-law is mixed, my daughter is white. Walking down the street in the various British cities where they have lived, nobody would give them a second glance, let alone have an issue with them as an interracial couple. On holiday in the USA a few years back, they apparently attracted a number of comments. All positive (the ones they heard, anyway) but they said it still felt surprising that people felt the need to comment, even if was to say how NICE it was to see a couple like them.
-psychedelic90-@reddit
I'm in a interracial relationship.
When I was younger, I got comments from the parents. But since then, no comments have been made until I met a girl of my own race. When I told her about my current partner and their race, she gave me quite a judgement sort of response. So, with that being said, it depends where you are and who you speak to. But most don't really care.
RelativeMatter3@reddit
Most people probably with two eyes but some with just one eye.
idontlikemondays321@reddit
Very normal. Some communities are more accepting than others though. Older British Asians are probably the least accepting. Younger white people probably the most. As a whole, the majority are cool with it and don’t really give it any thought
Pargula_@reddit
The UK is not as obsessed with race and skin color as the US has always been, unfortunately that is changing now with identity politics being imported increasingly more recently.
Eepy-Baby-101@reddit
People generally don't even think about race in dating. It's just normal.
bantasaurusrexx@reddit
It just you guys are hella racist still. Dont get me wrong its here to but not like over there.
Cheap-Concentrate954@reddit
Unfortunately America is still a VERY racist country. I don't think it will be changing for a long time- its still 50 or more years behind us.
JFK1200@reddit
Why do so many Americans post here asking questions about pretty mundane, everyday things like this?
Newsflash: there are parts of the world that are far more socially progressive than the US.
Mountain_Strategy342@reddit
I don't think it is even a talking point. Only a few fringe racist would ever think about it.
fletch3059@reddit
I married outside my race (I'm white, she is Indian) notably all her aunts and uncles married Indians for their first marriage. Those that divorced all had white partners after that.
We don't get any grief for being mixed race.
Secure_Ticket8057@reddit
As a general rule, people don’t care. And quite right too.
Although there are always idiots.
YardPale5744@reddit
So great to see the replies from my fellow Brits! We have more to be proud of than you think 🥰
CeleryEastern8993@reddit
I live in a 97.6% white district. People who don't know me (for example when I met colleagues for the first time) they were always shocked to find I'm not with someone from "my own race". One colleague was even asking me about my culture etc and then went on to say "so is your husband ... [Gesturing towards me] as well?" 😐
Familiar-Lychee-6609@reddit
Yeah nobody gives a fuck! I didn’t even think that was a still a thing until this post. Just couples!
AJMurphy_1986@reddit
Non issue
Conscious-Ball8373@reddit
I would just add that there are small communities where it is a very big issue but that in general it's not an issue. If you're part of a woman who is part of a strict Pakistani Muslim family, for instance, marrying someone who is not part of the same group can be just about taking your life in your hands. Even speaking to a man who is not a part of your immediate family can be seen as pretty taboo.
benjaminchang1@reddit
Chinese families also can be a bit weird about marrying non-Chinese people, especially if you're the only son (like my dad is). Apparently, some are slightly more okay with marrying a white person because their culture thinks it can lead to higher status.
All my cousins are half white and half Chinese because our my dad and his two sisters all married white partners. Our grandparents seem to love and accept us as their grandchildren, they even accept that I'm a transgender man.
SaintPepsiCola@reddit
It's really common, especially here in London. It's also seen as a higher class thing to do in London.
You're get +20 posh points if your partner is foreign.
CameramanNick@reddit
Commenting for a friend...
Friend's wife was Indian. The only person who ever had a problem with it was her father, who was about the most outspokenly racist individual friend had ever met. "Why can't you find a nice Punjabi boy?" She constantly had to apologise for him. Shame, really, as otherwise they'd have got on famously.
In most places, the US and the UK, if anyone has an issue I'd look first at why you're hanging out with such a dubious friend group.
BeKind321@reddit
No one cares!! Lots of friends are in relationships with many other nationalities and different skin colour’s and everyone doesn’t bat an eye lid. I do live in London though but I assume it’s the same in most multicultural cities across the uk.
ding-dongo@reddit
Honestly, from my perspective (grown up and live in London), likely wouldn't really notice it as a thing. You just see an interacial couple as a couple - it's too common an occurance to think any different. This may differ in other places in the UK where it's less multi-cultural.
d_o_uk@reddit
We don't discriminate against interracial couples. You will be disliked just as much as any other American :D
mumwifealcoholic@reddit
When I first came to the UK almost 20 years ago, it was one of the first things I noticed. It was surprising to me.
When I first brought home my black boyfriend it absolutely scandalised the small Mississippi town we lived in at the time. I remember a boss once telling me I'd never get ahead if brought a black man to the company Christmas party, that was Florida.
So, when I first got here it was breath of wonderful fresh air to see how much more common it was.
Far-Hope-6186@reddit
It is perfectly normal in the United Kingdom.
thepoliteknight@reddit
Usually in adverts.
doginjoggers@reddit
I have poor eyesight. So, blurry.
Outrageous-Garlic-27@reddit
I am a Brit who grew up in the US as a teen (in the South).
The difference between the UK and US is that interracial marriages were never outlawed, as they were in the US. There is a racial segregation that occurred in the US that was not so stark in the UK.
Very few people care who you date.
HamsterEagle@reddit
The same as any other couple, why would it be any different?
er_9000@reddit
The US seems to be absolutely obsessed with race, it's weird. I have dated lots of black and mixed girls, never had any negative interactions because of it
Beautiful-Control161@reddit
We don't care about people's skin colour here. In fact, until u just mentioned it, I never really noticed couples races
g0ldcd@reddit
I think in the US there's just more separation - and the relationships are just a symptom of that.
E.g. I worked a bit in Atlanta and got invited to church by people. When I politely declined (due to being an atheist and having no urge to spend more time with them), it was oddly explained to me that they "weren't just a black church", as if this would be the only possible reason for me to refuse.
Or sitting on the MARTA (light rail) and realising I was the only white person in the carriage - and then heading back out to Buckhead and seeing everybody had become white. I never saw any racism, just seemed to be that different races had different cultures and did different things - and everybody was fine with that.
In the UK it seems that most division is due to wealth/education/location - which indirectly has a racial element - but over time seems to be retreating
unbelievablydull82@reddit
The vast majority of people don't care
Dd_8630@reddit
I genuinely don't think it's crossed my mind that they're not just... A couple.
benjaminchang1@reddit
My parents are an interracial couple (white and Chinese), no one seems to have any problems with it, including in the predominantly white town we live in.
ForegoTheSludge@reddit
No one would give it a second thought, we don't think like that really. The UK is so multicultural it is commonplace to see couples of different races. Literally no one would have an opinion on it.
Desperate_Web4511@reddit
We don't generally have the same over the top identify politics here that seem to be so prevalent in America. So people don't define themselves by their race etc and no one gives a shit if your partner is a different ethnicity.
JebusHKryst@reddit
It's easier today. My parents were mixed back in the 60's and mum would regularly be spat at in supermarkets etc. My wife and I are mixed race and experienced some pushback - more so in the 90's and especially outside of London. These days it's pretty common and accepted.
Frap_Gadz@reddit
A lot of British people just wouldn't care or even think this was at all noteworthy. There'll always be a minority who consider stuff like this an issue but on the whole it's a non-issue here.
Important to note that on the whole America is more racially and ethnically diverse than the UK, even if it is more segregated. I would say that class remains the largest segregating factor in the UK.
philman132@reddit
I am white and my my 80+ year old grandmother made some comments when I started to date a girl whose parents were originally from Ethiopia, but no one else cared at all and my mother had a large argument with her over it! She didn't make any comments about it again (at least not in our earshot).
Most people won't give a damn except for maybe some of those over 80 or from particularly isolated or insular communities.
There is definite racism in both the US and the UK, but it manifests in very different ways. It seems much more overt and obvious in the US, manifesting in interacial relationships being almost more surprising there, whereas the relationships are normalised in the UK but the racism is a lot more subtle
ChiswellSt@reddit
Don’t really think it’s an issue, granted I live in inner London but even out in the more rural areas, bar a couple of older people doing a second take of us holding hands, no one cared.
Decent_Host4983@reddit
Only about 10% of relationships are ethnically-mixed, but it’s a 90% white country, so it’s pretty normalised, I guess. Anecdotally, all of the BME people I’ve been friends with have had other-ethnicity partners (and often mixed-ethnicity parents). There’s never been segregation or legalised systems of race-making in the UK itself - they saved that for the Empire - so people generally tend to live and work together and intermingle much more than in America. I have a black friend from Houston here in Japan who was telling me his 62-year-old mother was dating a Black-British fella named Charles. He told me in awe-struck tones “This mother-fucker don’t sound black - he talks like YOU! He wears a hat!”
SeeThePositive1@reddit
Not an issue at all and very normal. Live in a town for reference.
Administrative_Suit7@reddit
It's not viewed one way or the other, it's perfectly normal. I wouldn't expect even a dedicated bigot to bring it up even.
SwordTaster@reddit
Nobody in the UK really gives a flying fuck. I've felt way more judged about it in the US. My husband is a black American man, I'm a white English woman, and we started dating when he was in the UK with work. Whenever we were out in the UK, we never got a second look. Now that I've moved to the US with him, I notice the occasional stares when we're out at walmart or whatever. It's weird, and I'm never sure if it's because people heard me speak and it's the accent or if it's just because we're obviously an interracial couple.
arieschaotix@reddit
I don't think most people care in cities or even in rural areas. My parents are an interracial couple and lived in both America and England and only experienced negative or positive reactions in America, in England (and I would guess the UK) people don't care. That said, I am from Norfolk and know of people who had issues with their family accepting their interracial relationships or even just relationships with Eastern Europeans. And generally my Asian friends have told me their first generation parents would have a big problem if they dated a black man.
The_Hypnotic_Scot@reddit
Yup, people don’t tend to give it any thought here in the UK.
Gullflyinghigh@reddit
Barring the statically anomaly I doubt many people would give a toss.
I suspect you're more likely to get attention when one half of the couple is 'punching' than you are anything race based.
ooh_bit_of_bush@reddit
An Amazonian tribeswoman married to a Swedish aristocrat? ......meh.
A 4/10 married to a 8/10? Now THAT'S a mixed marriage!
Major_Basil5117@reddit
An interattractiveness relationship.
Prestigious_Dog_1942@reddit
Three of my mates are in interracial relationships, it's so normal that I only ever see or hear the word interracial from Americans
uncle_monty@reddit
Mostly not an issue. But I did used to date a girl whose parents originated from Hong Kong, and we did get some comments in the guise of 'banter', some pretty gross.
some_kinda_wack_job@reddit
I'm mixed race (black, white and a little bit Indian) and my (white passing) mum had some problems when she was dating my dad in the 80s. She's married to a different black guy now though and has no problems whatsoever, it's a completely different time. That's not to say there's no racism but it's rarely overt like it was back then.
I've dated white guys and am now married to one and have no issues at all. I don't even think about the fact we're "interracial".
Side note - technically id be in an interracial couple if I was with a black guy too but no one would see it that way!
rosielouisej@reddit
it’s just so normalised we don’t even use terms like interracial couple. they’re just a couple.
carl84@reddit
I think at most you might give an internal "Oh, okay", but ultimately it's nobody's business but their own
First-Butterscotch-3@reddit
The weird obsession over race is mostly an American thing....they are viewed as couples
theModge@reddit
I agreed with everyone at it's very common to see in the UK.
One thing I would add though is that my city of Birmingham UK has *old* inter-racial couples in the way that the rest of the country doesn't. I suspect this is more because we've had immigration for longer than smaller towns have, rather than any innately higher level of tolerance. The acceptance I think comes from having had immigration for a long time, so immigrants have been real people, not imaginary monsters for longer.
BlondBitch91@reddit
My partner is Chinese. I am white. Nobody cares. It’s none of their business.
prawntortilla@reddit
americans are a million times more obsessed with race
Imperterritus0907@reddit
I think even the word “interracial” is barely heard tbh, outside of corn. It’s not a thing and it sounds like an outdated descriptor. Like who cares.
Jordment@reddit
Inter what? As people in a relationship like anyone else? A non-issue with the younger generations: my parents thought my brother having a black girlfriend about 15 years ago was usual/odd, but these days?
brothererrr@reddit
I had a white boyfriend whose family thought it was weird he was dating me this was only 4 years ago and I live in a long time multicultural city. I think a lot of people are fine with other IR couples but draw the line at when it’s their family or friend doing it. Just been my experience and from viewing my friends in similar situation. It’s usually the family that are pushing back
londonflare@reddit
I think in some cultures it is still a bit less common - for instance potentially some of the more traditional Pakistani communities in northern towns but even then you do get some inter-racial couples.
I feel a big factor in the UK is there isn't black majority neighbourhoods like you get in the US. There is far more diversity. In turn you don't get a black middle class like you do in many US cities which with that diversity naturally lends itself to more interracial couples.
Prestigious_Dog_1942@reddit
Yeah class outranks race in the UK, you get rich and poor areas, not black and white areas
Batwoman09x@reddit
Honestly? Literally no one gives a shit. No one gives a shit here about anything unless it starts getting rammed down our throats or forced on us (example: religion, believe what you want, but when a local catholic in my town stood in the town centre telling children Santa isn’t real but god is, all hell broke lose, believe whatever nonsense you want, but don’t expect everyone to agree, that goes for everything)
saltyholty@reddit
It's still illegal, you'll be chased out of greggs and have shoes thrown at you.
But seriously, I don't want to to say no one cares, cos there's at least one of every kind of person in the world, but you could go your whole life without meeting someone who would care.
Qyro@reddit
I’ve never once seen an interracial couple and thought “they’re an interracial couple”. They’re just a couple.
T_raltixx@reddit
The same as any other couple. It doesn't matter.
donutaud15@reddit
When I started dating my now husband about 15 years ago we got the occasional stares. But now no one bats an eyelid. It's great.
theonlybandever13@reddit
no-one cares. Says more about you asking the question.
Saw_Boss@reddit
That is not particularly common where they're from?
Important_Ruin@reddit
Nobody cares. Americans are obsessed with race.
FletchLives99@reddit
So normal you wouldn't even think about it.
kvothe9595@reddit
I dont think anyone really gives a toot, i mean there are probably some areas where some eejits would frown upon it but for the most part they dont care. Most of the time i've seen people taking issue with it, its when its a second generation immigrant and the parents dont want their child pursuing a white person
ReliefZealousideal84@reddit
Nobody cares really. Just be with someone who shares your values and who you are attracted to. I dated an Israeli girl for a while and my first girlfriend was half Chinese. This is all very very normal in the UK.
crutlefish@reddit
As someone in a diverse relationship, and the only thing people ever mention is jealousy due to the wider gamut of food we have at home. Otherwise no one has mentioned anything.
Fun_Yogurtcloset1012@reddit
No one cares or have any issues
AonghusMacKilkenny@reddit
Modern and normal tbh!
SarreMolloy@reddit
I’m in an interracial marriage and no one outside of our families has ever commented on the fact. And the only reason our families ever mention is it because we come from different cultures and so that comes up in conversation. Literally no one cares here and it would be really weird if anyone ever said anything!
AeloraTargaryen@reddit
I don’t look at a mixed race couple and think “oh look! How different and brave they are!” I just see a couple. No one over here cares.
Gungadin34@reddit
I don’t think anyone gives a shit
No_Animator_6015@reddit
Literally never has been an issue and somewhat weird thing to ask.
moreboredthanyouare@reddit
Obviously not like in America as we tend to not give a fuck
MrTango650@reddit
Most people truly could not give less of a shite. Which is the way it should be, btw.
holytriplem@reddit
My parents are an interracial couple. They married in the 80s.
They've never got shit for it in my lifetime
quoole@reddit
It's not a huge deal here any more - me and my wife were a little worried when we first got together but haven't seen m/any issues or people making comments like they have to you - although we'd both at least heard stories of it happening.
Her family was a little concerned that I (white Brit) wouldn't except them or their culture fully. But now they love me and they joke I eat more Ghanaian food than she does!
It was a different experience 50-70 years ago. A good friend of ours, is the child of a mixed race couple in the 50s and they ran into a lot of racism. In fact his mum's family cut her off because she married a black man and his family cut him off because he married an Irish woman.
But now, I would say it's become increasingly common. In the past two years, we've been to at least 7 weddings. Out of that, all but one was mixed somehow.
tjjwaddo@reddit
I was on holiday in the Washington DC area about 10 years ago and I was surprised at just how MANY mixed race couples we saw. For some reason I had expected to see a lot fewer.
asphytotalxtc@reddit
At the very least, they won't bat an eyelid .. at the most, they'll be asking to come for dinner 😄
AnonymousTimewaster@reddit
I'd never even dream about asking someone about it because it's rude as fuck and will no doubt come across as racist, but I do find them slightly intriguing depending on the couple in question. I grew up in rural Lancashire though (towards Blackpool), where different ethnicities are pretty rare all in all. I can only remember a total of like 3 black people in my entire year (of about 200 people) at high school.
Fleurlamie111@reddit
It’s very normal and we just don’t think about it.
BritishBlitz87@reddit
You might get banter from older people but no actual hostility. I mentioned I particularly liked black girls at the place I worked at. Of course this was inevitably brought up by some joker whenever a black woman appeared on TV, etc. No one judged me but they did try and club together to order a black stripper for my birthday until the manager refused to rent them the hall lol. And yes, this place WAS basically a throwback to 1976. Best place I've ever worked though.
And my stepdad did find me dating a little Chinese girl amusing after years of taking the Mickey out of watching "little Chinese girls" (anime).
All this with white British people. YMMV.
dazed1984@reddit
No one bats an eyelid.
Lunaspoona@reddit
Uk never had segregation like the US, so it's very common. It's more frowned up to date someone outside of your 'class' than race. There are some cultures that would prefer their children not to date British people and prefer to keep within their culture. But in general, interracial couples are very common and noone bats an eyelid.
Wiccamanplays@reddit
My grandmother would make remarks about that sort of thing, but she’s dead now. Her older sister is still alive at 95 and has no problems with it.
exquisiteboobs@reddit
Nobody gives a fuck really.
Noiisy@reddit
Nobody cares, if someone mentioned it in a negative way they’d get shunned, unless they’re talking to other brain dead racists.
BadPallet@reddit
Don’t think I’d even give it a second thought
bduk92@reddit
It's not acknowledged to be honest. It's not something anybody really thinks about.
The UK and Europe contains a blend of various races so it's pretty common for people to date outside of their own race.
The lesson common thing is people dating outside of their own religion, but that's more of a cultural thing.
FEMXIII@reddit
I'm quite lucky to have been born with great sight, so I just use my eyes.
Edible-flowers@reddit
It's more usual in cities where no one will notice.
Specific_Telephone_3@reddit
As a couple.
Trikecarface@reddit
It's normal just like it should be in every country
abgc161@reddit
I was in an interracial relationship and had two instances of getting very nasty comments from strangers over the course of four years.
Most people are decent. The minority of arseholes aren’t worth worrying about.
amore_pomfritte@reddit
Viewed as any other couple.
bestorangeever@reddit
Everyday normal in the multicultural melting pot
Throwaway4VPN@reddit
The same as non-interracial couples. like a couple.
richbun@reddit
Everyone is mixed marriages nowadays, have you not seen the TV ads?
22Sandra4a@reddit
They are seen as a rare sighting of a mystical unicorn couple! 🦄🦄
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