hi so how does someone even do this to a windshield

Na I did that a bit . I was a heavy hitter lol I quit hitting for my softball team because of it this is bigger than that. I think the people that are saying basketball 🏀 are probably correct or soccer ball aka American football,

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

to add, the car was parked for this whole time😭

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Sure_lll_Eat_That@reddit

Someone climb onto your hood and butt-drop onto the windshield? Had a roommate had this happen to his car and the windshield looked identical.

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

how would they not get shards of glass in their ass😭

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ZachOf_AllTrades@reddit

It's tempered

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cbg13@reddit

Windshield glass is actually not tempered. It's the only glass in the car that isn't. But it is laminated to prevent shards from making it into the cabin & becoming dangerous

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CherishSlan@reddit

Sadly Tiney little bits of hit sometimes do. You can probably guess how I know this.. 🫤 I lived.

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mbt20@reddit

Modern car glass doesn't shatter. It stays in one piece to prevent injuries.

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cerialthriller@reddit

Modern windshield glass stays in one piece to keep passengers from being ejected during a collision and keep objects out if one is struck. The rest of the windows are tempered safety glass that will shatter in tiny pieces so that it can’t cause anything more than superficial cuts during an accident.

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

my car had shards in it, so yeah it’s probably better but if someone did actually use their ass, shit probably hurt so bad

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HoveringHog@reddit

Essentially it shattered inward then, the force of their colossal dumper was enough to knock bits into the car and away from their gravity generating posterior.

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HillarysFloppyChode@reddit

Windshields are glass bonded to plastic. So you don’t get glass shards in your eyes during an accident.

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deleted_by_reddit@reddit

[removed]

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

EDIT: someone jumped on it! bingo if you guessed this.

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GreekUPS@reddit

Pumpkin

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Glockoma92@reddit

With they ass 🤣

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Fantastic-Method9204@reddit

Bowling ball

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Afraid-Paper-3484@reddit

Last time I saw that I had hit a pedestrian

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L7Wennie@reddit

Someone’s sexy time on your car went horribly wrong.

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VisibleIce9669@reddit

Human butt

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Competitive_Ad2114@reddit

Neglect your woman

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scobo505@reddit

Looks like a hummingbird strike.

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DJMagicHandz@reddit

Do you have any recent beef with anyone?

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DustyBusterson@reddit

This is why when I go out with friends, I make sure they always order chicken. Never beef.

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DJMagicHandz@reddit

Beef in this aspect refers to an altercation/confrontation. I would suspect that this is chicken as it was done while OP wasn't around.

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ZestyPenguinFart@reddit

Aight im convinced people are dumb, that was a clever joke, and you ARE NOT getting the credit you deserve.

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muricabrb@reddit

The woosh is strong with this one.

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DustyBusterson@reddit

Yes it was a joke.

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ThermalScrewed@reddit

Nah bro, you can't avoid your problems and let them escalate. You gotta go out for smash burgers, squash the beef.

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porsche4life@reddit

He cut off Ali Wong in traffic.

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

no im just gay😭 i think this was a hate crime

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RE-Crusader_23@reddit

https://www.thepropgallery.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/1237a862d6c676013bffa5bff9a163f3/v/l/vlcsnap-2015-12-03-12h56m34s99.png

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Chonky47finesse@reddit

Weir everywhere…

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Polishspy@reddit

Vulture, I hit one and it did the same thing

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mannrya@reddit

I was gonna say, I own an auto glass shop and we see damage just like this from turkeys all the time

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Putrid_Culture_9289@reddit

No blood?

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Polishspy@reddit

Not a drop, just a dead bird, hit it at 80mph

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Putrid_Culture_9289@reddit

Crazy. Glad you're okay : )

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RedFaceFree@reddit

Step on it.

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deleted_by_reddit@reddit

[removed]

[-]

AutoModerator@reddit

Unfortunately your comment has been removed because your Reddit account is less than a day old OR your comment karma is negative. This filter is in effect to minimize spam and trolling from new accounts. Moderators will not put your comment back up.

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Duke2852@reddit

Rock. Foot. Ass. Hammer. Sack o' taters. Anything really.

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FlickerOfBean@reddit

He probably pissed off some big booty hoe.

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intelligentbrownman@reddit

I was just say ask tiger wood ex wife 🤷🏾‍♂️

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

nope im just a gay woman living during trump era politics

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OD_Emperor@reddit

But how do they know you're gay because of the car?

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

lived in the same complex for over a year, a pride flag being on the balcony would be a clue

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here4soop@reddit

Is the car a Subaru Ascent?

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Dense_Pirate3308@reddit (OP)

it is not

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here4soop@reddit

Damn the door is shaped the same and I was ready hoping you drove a Subaru for the funny.

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OD_Emperor@reddit

I mean that seems really roundabout.

If anything I bet it was simply an asshole. I've had random acts like this happen too. It sucks.

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here4soop@reddit

It looks like a Subaru Ascent 💀

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ZachOf_AllTrades@reddit

The theory stands

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FlickerOfBean@reddit

It’s no longer a theory.

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pentum100@reddit

Coconut from a tall coconut tree

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ItsValor@reddit

A turkey

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nosoyuncretino@reddit

I once did something like that drowning a ballon full of water from a second floor to my uncle as a prank. Worst idea ever hahahaha

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impairedoctor@reddit

A turkey did that to mine a few years back.

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akmacmac@reddit

Was it parked near a basketball court or other play where someone would have been playing some kind of sport?

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MossRockTreeCreek@reddit

Yeah, saw a windshield get broken like this at a soccer tournament. Ball went over the fence and smacked a BMW straight on the windshield.

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mrzurkonandfriends@reddit

If there's fender damage, a hit and run.

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z0mghenry@reddit

ninja turtle did a reverse body slam

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Clean_Brilliant_8586@reddit

I saw something similar once, although it wasn't quite as extensive and it flexed outward instead of inward. Many years ago, a friend and I were riding slowly in stop and go traffic in town and the people in the car in front of us weren't paying close enough enough attention. They rear-ended the car in front of them, and the girl in the passenger's seat wasn't wearing a seat belt. She came forward and made a head-shaped bubble in the windshield. I guess it protruded about three inches at the maximum point of deformation. She was walking around afterward, had slight scratches on one side of her face but probably had a concussion.

Anyway, it kind of looked like that.

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aFreeScotland@reddit

Bowling ball

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grizzlor_@reddit

Jimmy McGill style

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leadfoot_mf@reddit

fuckin slippin jimmy

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bal16128@reddit

Better hope the culprit didn't also pull a Chicago Sunroof

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TheJamesDTV@reddit

Niko and Roman were drinking a little too much that night

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Jarthos1234@reddit

Obviously you’re not a golfer.

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Malakai0013@reddit

Basketball dropped from a fifth-story apartment?

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Macsoblik@reddit

alcohol is not a drug

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NotoriousNRO@reddit

Easily

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ballisticturtle@reddit

Bowling ball

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PowerfulPudding7665@reddit

Dark matter.

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Competitive_Tower327@reddit

A rock

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sangedered@reddit

That’s an awesome sunshade

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Minimum_Aside741@reddit

Israel missed the target once again.

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getinshape2022@reddit

Failed twerking. There is a video of it

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wiseoracle@reddit

I think I saw a video of someone twerking and lost balance and ass cheek to windshield it went

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alehanro@reddit

Looks like its also really cold out, like the windows are covered in frost. A basketball from the 4rth floor would do thag

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Mad_Moniker@reddit

I’ve seen an owl do that to a Skoda! Built like Russian tank🤭

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britishelvis@reddit

Bowling ball

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HorseEducational1248@reddit

Probably cheating on someone

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Mrs3anw@reddit

Looks like someone did a flying elbow or a butt bomb.

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joshistaken@reddit

Bum

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caribb@reddit

Meteorite? Bowling ball makes the most sense to me so far.

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ConstructionRare4123@reddit

Maybe hit a deer

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Consistent-Ad8044@reddit

Bowling ball

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IIIuminatIII@reddit

Bowling ball

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domlovesfish@reddit

Similar damage when I broke up with my ex, except her heels but a couple holes through the windshield lmao. She definitely worked for it, somebody jumped on this mf windshield.

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TheJamesDTV@reddit

Niko and Roman tried to go bowling while drunk

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SpaceFace11@reddit

Pumpkin

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cheffraydo@reddit

i could easily show u

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No-Needleworker-3765@reddit

Bowling ball?? Idk man this doesn't really look like a bowling pin to me tho

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opensky727@reddit

This happened to a friend of mine, he had his car parked on a street in line with a lot of other cars and someone just ran across on top and it did that..

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Manic_Mini@reddit

A pumpkin at 10mph will do it.

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SurpriseButtStuff@reddit

A pumpkin? This time of year at this time of day in this part of the country localized entirely within OPs windshield?

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saltedcrypt@reddit

…myes

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FiddlerOnThePotato@reddit

it's an Albany expression

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Manic_Mini@reddit

Yes a pumpkin thrown out of a moving car at about 10mph will leave a similar impression in a window.

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SurpriseButtStuff@reddit

r/woosh

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Mogul_Destroyer@reddit

I have had my front windshield break like that 3 times here in Tahoe. Wet snow clumps falling out of very tall trees, the pine cones can do some serious damage, too.

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LongJumpToWork@reddit

Bowling ball

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weindavin@reddit

Headbutt

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BouncyBlueYoshi@reddit

Throw a turtle at it

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mobilshooter@reddit

With a shoe

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telecoaster@reddit

Pumkin, given the time of year

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1972FordGuy@reddit

Big Butt Bertha gently lowered her enormous ass onto the windshield but after a 43 taco lunch, she cut loose with a mega-fart and not only did she destroy the windshield, she launched herself into the upper atmosphere.

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KingLoCoKev@reddit

Baseball bat

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eezyE4free@reddit

Large ball of ice. Heavy and dense enough to cause the damage.

And with enough time all the shards will melt and evaporate and leave no trace.

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nickskater09@reddit

Ricky kinda freaked out and threw a turkey which might’ve gone through a windshield of one of the cars but it’s like anyone would’ve done that

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Puzzleheaded-Song259@reddit

Is it parked in front of a balcony? Tbh it looks like a basketball from about the third or fourth floor.

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Master-Yota-JZX81@reddit

Something rounded and heavy, the diameter of a baseball bat or bigger. Assuming it was likely not a thrown object or you’d have likely found it nearby or reported damage on the hood too. Or if it was a baseball or something, it was possibly removed by whoever did it. It’s probably a safe bet the damage was done intentionally, or at least whoever did it knows they did it. If you don’t have beef with anyone right now, the most likely suspect would be a drunk asshole passing by and acting like a drunk asshole.

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