ULPT Should I press charges because of my leaked nu_des?
Posted by anonymous_person_yk@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 138 comments
A stranger wrote to me on Insta today (I don't know how they found my Insta account).
They sent me a link to a p.rn site where several nu_des of me (with my first name) were uploaded. The nu_des were without my face, but there were also selfies in the same post and combined with those you can tell it's me.
There were also several reposts on the p.rn site (some with well over ten thousand views)... I reported all of them on the grounds that they were my own pictures and that I was only 17 in the selfies (I was 18 in the nu_des). The posts have since been deleted. But the people could of course upload them again at any time.
I know who uploaded the pictures. I confronted the person and they blocked me. Unfortunately, I don't know their address or their full name.
Would you press charges for something like this (even if it probably won't help) or would you leave it alone?
Thanks so much in advance!
sammagee33@reddit
FYI - you can say “nudes” and “porn”
Definitely press charges
MNGirlinKY@reddit
God I hate this shit here.
Thuggish_Coffee@reddit
I'm, excuse you. It's, ',sh!t.'
melperz@reddit
What the frick
mayorofdumb@reddit
Get the 🍴 out of here
peerless_event@reddit
I'll take my silverware and go
mayorofdumb@reddit
I have no silverware left to give
mysteryteam@reddit
ENOUGH is ENOUGH. I've HAD It
mayorofdumb@reddit
I'm just hoping AI will make my emails very passive aggressive or legalese
drake90001@reddit
Zero effect on you.
Different sites and even subreddits have different rules. You can be auto removed based on one word.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Okay, I wasn't sure haha. Thank you!
extraspectre@reddit
for real, why would you think this though?
zzzorba@reddit
Facebook has trigger words that will auto ban posts and users
simcowking@reddit
Even Reddit has some subs that auto ban words.
zSprawl@reddit
Cause every place has different rules.
ChopBox@reddit
tiktok brained
truly_not_an_ai@reddit
This is reddit - you can even say fuck
Sazzybee@reddit
And Cunt. I'm in Australia. It's almost obligatory in the comments.
Adept-Dragonfruit-31@reddit
Gday cunt owsitgoin?
Sazzybee@reddit
I'm good, cunt! Y'self?
Adept-Dragonfruit-31@reddit
Not bad. Cant complain. No cunt'll listen anyway.
ericfromct@reddit
Sick cunt is my favorite expression ever. To bad I don’t know enough aussies in real life to be able to say it as often as I’d like
A-non-e-mail@reddit
Step four: don’t say “Fuck” anymore ‘Cause “Fuck” is the worst word that you can say “Fuck” is the worst word that you can say! We shouldn’t say “Fuck” No, we shouldn’t say “Fuck,” “Fuck” no!
Ok_Telephone_3013@reddit
He said it. The F dash dash dash word 😱
Savannah_Lion@reddit
I've no More Fucks to Give
kivsemaj@reddit
So just use the word M'kay
JimmerAteMyPasta@reddit
You tainted my Virgini Christian ears, fuck you!
imbroken06272020@reddit
Corn
Chomp3y@reddit
What charges?
jirashap@reddit
This post is bogus. What's the percentage chance that someone who knows you happens to trip over a photo of someone they knew? The probability of this happening is less than winning the lottery
OkTea7227@reddit
What country are you in? If it’s in the EU I have a lawyer contact who will excoriate your old friend and the website.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Really? I live in Europe but not in the EU. Could this lawyer still help me?
jirashap@reddit
How would anyone possibly know the answer to this question
Piper6728@reddit
Revenge porn is illegal
Sue him
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Why does everyone keep calling them him even though I never disclosed their gender... so interesting.
But yeah, I'll go to the police tomorrow.
Piper6728@reddit
Statistically men are 2-3 times more likely than women to be the perpetrators of posting revenge porn
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Exactly... that's not enough to automatically assume it was a man.
It wasn't in my case.
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
I appreciate your honesty. I'm sorry they downvoted you. It's definitely too close to fairly assume it was a man. To be fair, my brain did also say man, but I thank you for correcting us.
Charming_Squash_9057@reddit
How is 2-3x more likely even remotely close?
"2-3x more likely" is very fair to make such an assumption.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
I disagree. Especially since the assumption isn't the case in my situation.
Charming_Squash_9057@reddit
So without any additional information, we just know that someone committed revenge porn and that for every 1 female perpetrator, there are 2-3 male perpetrators.
That's 66-75% odds.
If the lottery ran on 66-75% odds of winning, most people would buy a ticket, but wouldn't be terribly shocked if they lost.
If you want to spread the word it was a female perpetrator than put it in your post.
People aren't denying that a woman can be a perpetrator, you just didn't originally say so and it's usually a male.
"Usually" meaning 66-75% of the time.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
I know you're not saying that. My point is that we shouldn't jump to conclusions like that.
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
So you don't assume crack must mean black, but do assume that revenge porn must mean male perpetrated? It's still just a projection about your beliefs on a certain group of people. Both are statistically in your favor, since black people are prosecuted more often for crack convictions.
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
Would you assume that someone was black strictly because they have a crack distribution charge?
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
lol.. why is everyone downvoting me... what I'm saying is true..
SSPRacquetballPod@reddit
Yes, press charges.
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
I'm sorry that this happened to you. I'm sorry that anyone is blaming you in these posts. Yes, people do get convicted of this crime, but realistically it's a very small number compared to the reports.
Deep fakes and AI are starting to call nudes into question now, if that's any consultation. This trend is likely to disappear once you can't tell the real ones from the fakes.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Not everyone is, most people aren't :) I can handle it, you kinda have to expect that when you post on Reddit
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
For sure. It's just still disgusting to see it happen. I wish you the very best.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
thank you <3
raychandlier@reddit
That's disgusting. What's the site?
doctordevices01@reddit
Yes horrible definitely tell us so we know where to avoid!
BirdFragrant6018@reddit
Just move on. Sorry it happened to you but ignoring and moving on is the best course of action.
Ignore, block, don’t engage any further. They won’t do anything. And if they do, so what? Who is surprised by a naked body? It’s 2024, not Victorian England.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
17 is not underage. -> Umm.. of course it is.
A scammer from Nigeria or India. -> No, it's not. They spoke my local dialect (only about 4 million people speak it and it's almost impossible to learn).
I don't think the police would do anything either tbh. I wouldn't pay money for a lawyer but I'll go report it to the police just to get some closure.
BirdFragrant6018@reddit
In what country 17 is underage? Let’s google age of consent in your country.
If you report it to police, you won’t get closure. You will start a formal investigation that will impact only you. If they actually start doing things, It will keep bothering you with little to no prospects. And you may antagonize your blackmailer to go further and do more damage. My advice - don’t do anything.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Which blackmailer??
pinkshirtbadman@reddit
Given that the context about being underage here is not consenting to a sexual act, but is about distribution of pornagraphic images yes 17 is absolutely underage. At the very least in the US it is illegal to distribute or produce pornagraphic images containing individuals under 18 years old, whether or not the person consented to having the picture taken is irrelevant.
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
The Vatican, Chile, Argentina, etc
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
17 is underage in not all, but most states.
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
17 is not underage in all 50 states, but your situation has nothing to do with the United States.
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
17 is underage in not all, but most states.
For example, 17 is not underage in Louisiana but is underage in Virginia.
Also the large majority of crimes committed over the internet are prosecuted federally because it almost always crosses state lines.
fupadestroyer45@reddit
Where you sending nudes to a random, you don't have their full name? Everyone, learn from this, this is how you get blackmailed.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
These wouldn't work as blackmail to me.
LarryCrabCake@reddit
Yes, you can absolutely press charges, and if you have receipts, it's an open and shut case.
If your state is on this list, go for it.
duckduckduck21@reddit
That list literally contains all 50 states. And the District of Columbia.
Umikaloo@reddit
/r/usdefaultism
mayorofdumb@reddit
🗽 (American Thumbs Up)
chihuahuassuck@reddit
And yet, OP's state was not on the list.
jakewotf@reddit
Doesn’t include territories tho!!
Only half /s
LarryCrabCake@reddit
Precisely.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Thank you.
I don't live in the US, but it's illegal in my country too.
Camimo666@reddit
Okay. Search your local laws, go to the police. If you have screenshots, numbers, recipts of ANYTHING give that to them. If you can, go with a trusted adult who is understanding. It will not be an easy process but you were underage at the time. So yeah.
authoringpirate@reddit
Can I see? For science purposes
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
Homie, I'm worried about you. You okay? Who did this to you?
mekoomi@reddit
weirdo
authoringpirate@reddit
Worry about your mentally ill cousin
SuddenlySurreal@reddit
Homie, I'm worried about you. You okay? Who did this to you?
MidLifeCrisis111@reddit
Oh fuck off
authoringpirate@reddit
no
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
They're deleted. And your joke isn't that creative.
authoringpirate@reddit
Not trying to joke or be creative, not sure what gave you that impression
kukulka99@reddit
Press charges and tell the police you were 17. Then you got them for distribution of CP. BINGO BANGO
Aheg@reddit
If you knew how to properly read you would know that the nude pics were after 18, not at 17 so no CP in that case. Still worth reporting.
ejbalington@reddit
They are suggesting an advanced psychological technique known as lying.
Aheg@reddit
I realized that when he replied to my comment that I made a mistake, night shifts fucks with brain it seems xd Sorry for the confusion.
kukulka99@reddit
It wouldn't be unethical if there wasn't a lie in there
Aheg@reddit
My bad, my brain didn't realize that what you wrote is indeed right.
Also original files probably no longer exist so even Police wouldn't have the exif data right? So no one can prove she wasn't 17.
Once again, sorry for my confusion.
Mostlytrollingyall@reddit
Wouldn’t she be charged since she sent cp to someone else?
hardlookingaway@reddit
I’ve dealt with this - go legal
FloppyVachina@reddit
Of course you should press charges, its more about if you want to or not. You will have no problem getting this person in trouble since you have lots of proof. Dont let reddit decide for you, make your own choice. Youre holding the match and the fucker who leaked your shit is holding a bucket full of gas.
Airplade@reddit
NU Des? The rap singer?
Separate_Tax2343@reddit
Yes girl, please that is distribution of child yk what…. That’s a very serious offense. Please report them to the police chances are you aren’t their only victim. In process of reporting ur own stuff the cops might find more abuse… :,( I’m so sorry this has happened to you.
authoringpirate@reddit
Actually not cp, as she was 18 when she took the nudes.
Separate_Tax2343@reddit
Oh oops her selfies which ig were not ndes were taking as a minor
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Yeah, but selfies of minors shouldn't be on porn sites either...
Skyblacker@reddit
It's close enough to CP to look bad for the person who posted it.
Separate_Tax2343@reddit
Yes I agree completely, please report them. I’ll keep you in my prayers tonight.
authoringpirate@reddit
It’s still really fucked up for someone to post your nudes online, and I’m sure it has to be illegal in some states
Jumpy-Ad6470@reddit
If you know who uploaded then yes absolutely press charges.
At the very least print out a cease and desist letter and send it via certified mail if you have their address. The threat of legal action may be scary enough to prevent the reupload.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Unfortunately, I don't have their address or full name.
Skyblacker@reddit
The police can request that information from Instagram.
BlueTrin2020@reddit
Go to the police
Jumpy-Ad6470@reddit
This, bring what info you have and press charges.
They have the resources to pull a full name.
dacraftjr@reddit
A citizen can’t press charges. Citizens can only make complaints. The prosecutor presses charges. A citizen doesn’t have the legal authority to do so.
DaRedditGuy11@reddit
You "know" who did it, but can you prove that they did it? It's an important distinction in the law.
If you think you can prove this person did it, then I think it makes sense to press charges. I also think there's some reason to stop for a second before jumping in feet first–to avoid a Streisand Effect type of issue.
AffectionateBrick687@reddit
The ethical answer is pressing charges. If the asshole who leaked your pics has anything of value, you could try cutting a deal, cash, and you don't press charges.
thickdom44@reddit
no address and dont know ow the persons full name... looks like you have made several bad choices
Gullible_Increase146@reddit
Do it if you think it'll make you feel better. Whoever uploaded it did a pretty s*** thing and he would probably get hit for Revenge porn if it's illegal in your state. If you're 17 it's illegal regardless but I kind of doubt they would treat him the way they would treat somebody selling massive CP stashes on the dark web. Regardless of what you decide to do I hope it was just that one site and now that it was taken down that's the end of it. It's just not something people should be having to deal with
Bhetty1@reddit
Press criminal charges if possible. It may not be worth suing civil or it may be. Depends on your locale
dekab_1982@reddit
How did this person happen to come across these pictures in the first place?
Flatulence_Tempest@reddit
A lot of states have revenge porn laws but even if not that it might fall under other statutes. If they person still has the pic and they would do something like this to begin, you might have to report them to put a halt to it. There is nothing wrong with nude pics but they belong to you and not out in the wild. Sorry this happened to you.
FoxFXMD@reddit
Why do you put _ in nudes
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
I wasn't sure if I'd get flagged otherwise.
extraspectre@reddit
flagged for what?
OnionTruck@reddit
Censorship. Many sites auto-filter certain keywords.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
exactly
Senzualdip@reddit
Really can’t spell porn or nudes?? This smells like a bot, or an idiot.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Lol, I didn't know I could do that here. I created this account today.
flyzapper@reddit
You can not press charges. If it is illegal in your area, you can report it to police. They will investigate and a district attorney or prosecutor may press charges if they feel that there is enough evidence.
kodamariposa@reddit
Depending on the state I think. I live in nevada and When I went you could not file a police report and they told me I had to go to the court house and file a petition. Its a cyber issue so I guess police don't have the same grounds or something.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
That's what I meant by that. I translated it with DeepL since English isn't my first language.
kodamariposa@reddit
You can and you should
Burntoutn3rd@reddit
If you can you should, but if the underage photos weren't nude, this unfortunately isn't a crime in about half of the states.
OnionTruck@reddit
I'll never understand why people photograph themselves nude. I hope you go to the police. They have ways of finding out who it is.
dumpitdog@reddit
Please do the world and mankind a favor and press charges.
_perfectly_cromulent@reddit
Yes, please do!
Humans_Suck-@reddit
Press charges. The police have no way of knowing how old you were in them, so you can just tell them you were 17 in all of them.
KeepBanningKeepJoin@reddit
Police won't do anything about this
GnPQGuTFagzncZwB@reddit
It would be easy to say go after them, but you have a lot of proving to do, including that the nudes w/o faces are really you, and how are you going to prove they were taken when you were 17. And how did they get them, did they take them or did you take them and send them? They should not have ended up on the net and the site did the right thing by taking them down, but I am not sure you are going to have an easy road if you try and go after the person who you think probably did it.
I would be thankful the site took them down without a big kerfuffle.
I can feel the downvotes coming already. Before you hit the button, know I did not make this system we live in and there are a lot of times I do not agree with it. But it is what it is and it works the way ir works and to go into something like that is going to be easy is sadly misleading.
So instead of misleading you, I would say talk to a trusted lawyer before the cops. They can give you a much more realistic opinion of what you have to deal with and the odds of that happening, and also sadly, the cops often do not know the law. Lawyers do. My mothers BF went off and slugged my sister one time, cops were like who cares? She called me, I called my lawyer. He called the cops. All of the sudden they cared very much.
I wish you the best in whatever direction you go in.
Casehead@reddit
it's called revenge porn and it's very illegal in most places.
opticrice@reddit
Yeah all that stuff about proving things, like what age you were, is bs. Someone sharing your intimate photos without your permission is all it takes for most laws, but it varies by state.
GnPQGuTFagzncZwB@reddit
I totally agree with you. However saying you kind of think you know who may have done it, might leave the cops with a hard time getting a warrant for that persons phone or internet records.
Just because something is illegal does not mean it is easy to prove. And it sounded like the OP was not really sure who did it.
I mean I could say you did something to me. Should they come and toss you in jail or would you prefer to have some level of scrutiny be met first?
LowAd3406@reddit
This is great advice. I know at least in my town, the cops won't do shit other than open up a case and nothing else.
Sealion_31@reddit
Screw unethical. Go legal. I’m sorry this happened. This person needs to be held accountable by the law.
CookieWifeCookieKids@reddit
That’s horrible. Show me where this is!
Communistpirate69@reddit
What’s the @?
BluBeams@reddit
This isn't tiktok or youtube...You're allowed to use nudes and porn here when writing a post.
Yes, press charges.
anonymous_person_yk@reddit (OP)
Good to know, I'm new here.