Do you often accidentally apologise to inanimate objects?

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mprhusker@reddit

Where a Brit would say "sorry" such as when accidentally bumping into someone in a crowd or when alerting someone nearby in the aisle of a supermarket that you would like them to move slightly so you can get past them, an American is likely to say "excuse me".

Ever since moving to the UK I considered both terms equivalent but have more or less adapted to saying "sorry". Less as an apology but just as a reflex for having the audacity to exist around other people. My in-laws visited recently and the very American father in law said "excuse me" instead of "sorry" like I've come to expect and my gut instinct was that it sounded rude lol. So I wonder if Brits hear us say "excuse me" and think we're being rude when it's actually the polite way to ask someone to move in the US.

Anyway sorry (or please excise me) as it's Friday and I've had a few after work pints with my colleagues so I might have completely missed the mark with your question and am now just rambling about nonsense.

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ferret_80@reddit

an American is likely to say "excuse me".

Is this evidenced or anecdotal? Maybe regional?
I always use "sorry."

"Excuse me" is reserved for when I'm moving past someone purposefully as more of an "apology in advance, but you're kinda in the way"

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mprhusker@reddit

Is this evidenced or anecdotal?

This is one of the reddit-isms that needs to die. This is a casual discussion. It is not a PhD dissertation. There will almost never be peer reviewed academic sources to back up claims about every day life experiences in a reddit comment. Everything is anecdotal and that should never need to be clarified.

"Excuse me" is reserved for when I'm moving past someone purposefully as more of an "apology in advance, but you're kinda in the way"

This is exactly what I meant. A Brit would use "sorry" in that context. And before you ask, no, I don't have a peer reviewed academic source to back up that claim.

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ferret_80@reddit

Kansan in London

I'm trying to find out if you've more than 1 state of experiences before dictating how all Americans act.

I accidentally hit or bump into something

I say "sorry." i only use "Excuse me" when pushing through someone.

if we bump shoulders in passing I say "sorry", if I need to squeeze past someone I say "sorry." once again "Excuse Me" is reserved for pushing THROUGH someone.

that doesn't sound like what you described.

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caraperdida@reddit

I think this might just be a you thing!

My father is British and I've never seen him apologize to an inanimate object.

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presidintfluffy@reddit

I thank and apologize to GPT and I’ll murmur to my computer if I’m working on it.

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JustDorothy@reddit

No, but I do occasionally call them 'dude'

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ZapVegas@reddit

Yep

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ihatethesidebar@reddit

I don’t think I apologize but I did say goodbye to a chair I threw out yesterday.

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Brother_To_Coyotes@reddit

I talk to cars a lot. Feels like prayers to the machine spirit. Praise the motive force. If I’m apologizing it’s because the Fiat and I killed another cone or something.

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LuawATCS@reddit

I rarely apologize to inanimate objects, I will often other them to "stay".

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pirawalla22@reddit

I apologize to more animals than I really need to, but I don't think I often do it with inanimate objects.

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ChuushaHime@reddit

Keep apologizing to your animals--a lot of them understand! Not the literal words that comprise the apology, but the tone of your voice and body language convey that the bump was a mistake.

Many animals (like dogs) who use roughhousing amongst one another as a form of play will demonstrate "apology" behaviors if they go too far (standing down, bowing, grooming the other animal), and there's also recent research out of the Max Planck Institute in Germany that suggests dogs specifically understand the concept of an "accident" even outside of physical accidents.

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Lupiefighter@reddit

I either apologize or berate them. There really is not an in between.

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TameFyre@reddit

I’m more likely to give it a dirty look as if IT bumped into ME

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Ok_Perception1131@reddit

I apologize to plants when I throw them away. “I’m sorry I wasn’t a better carer for you,” as I gently set my dried-up houseplant into my trash can.

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ColossusOfChoads@reddit

I quietly curse the person who gifted me the plant. That happens a lot in Italy.

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RemonterLeTemps@reddit

I haven't had to throw many plants away, but occasionally I do have to trim them back. Before their 'surgery' I say, "this is probably going to hurt, but you'll be ok." Also, my mom used to say her plants were 'having babies' when they were sprouting new leaves, as in "Ms. Philodendron is having a baby!"

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Ok_Perception1131@reddit

I love this

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ColossusOfChoads@reddit

I curse at them.

"Ouch! Goddamned thing."

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SquashDue502@reddit

I say “bruh” a lot to inanimate objects when they inconvenience me, ex. I hit my shin on the coffee table “bruh stop”

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Royal_Biscotti3592@reddit

No. I just call the object and asshole

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_vercingtorix_@reddit

nah, if I hit an inanimate object, I usually interject "fuck" or something like that, mostly out of surprise. By calling out thusly that I've hit an inanimate object and stumbled, I announce to any human who might be behind me that I am stumbling and might be slower moving than expected and thus they ought to mind their stride if they're behind me walking. I recognize that it was an accident of steerage and not of personal space, though, and so I do not apologize. I gave you a warning when I said "fuck", so if you trip into me, you owe me an apology lol.

I'd only really apologize to someone if I expressed (either verbally or performatively) something which crosses social class lines with an intention to keep peace without coming to blows, or if I get social signs that I did such a thing inadvertently due to a lack of knowledge of the local custom.

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bloodectomy@reddit

I scold objects that annoy me but never apologize to them

¯\(ツ)/¯

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_meshy@reddit

That god damned bed post jumped right out in front my little toe. Totally its fault and not mine.

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WodehouseWeatherwax@reddit

That's completely different. That's attempted murder and it's not one bit sorry.

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Bamboozle_@reddit

I have definitely booed inanimate objects before.

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xxxjessicann00xxx@reddit

I boo my television when bad things happen during sports

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pearlsbeforedogs@reddit

I'm half and half, depending on my mood. Some objects get an apology, some get called out for being in my way. Anything falling over will get a talkin' to, though.

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lavasca@reddit

Seems normal enough

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Pleased_Bees@reddit

No, but I've been known to name them. I have an antique mahogany dresser named Percival and a car named Ruby who is blue.

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bombadilsf@reddit

I had a Nissan sedan named Greg. I’ll be really surprised if anyone here gets the reference.

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down42roads@reddit

Poet/author?

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bombadilsf@reddit

Not really. Do you have someone in particular in mind?

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down42roads@reddit

Guy named Greg Nissan, according to google

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bombadilsf@reddit

There is such a guy, but he’s not the person I had in mind. Look for a religious reference.

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down42roads@reddit

The Cappadocian Father?

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bombadilsf@reddit

Bingo! Gregory Nyssen bishop of Nyssa, 372-376 AD

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bombadilsf@reddit

Close. Gregory Nyssa or Gregory Nyssen, a Christian Saint, bishop of Nyssa, 372-376.

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Pleased_Bees@reddit

I don't know that reference, but your username tells me you're a Tolkien fan.

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bombadilsf@reddit

That I am.

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RemonterLeTemps@reddit

My antique dresser's named Max

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geri73@reddit

I don't, but I will apologize to my cats if I have wronged them in any way.

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RemonterLeTemps@reddit

I always do this, especially if I've accidentally stepped on a tail. They seem to take that very personally!

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geri73@reddit

They do, among other things.

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nemo_sum@reddit

Not accidentally. I do it intentionally.

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cIumsythumbs@reddit

Came here to say this.

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Apocalyptic0n3@reddit

I'm from Michigan. I don't say "Sorry" but I will say "Ope" which I think qualifies as an apology in that context

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worthwhilewrongdoing@reddit

My family is from Michigan and I seriously miss hearing "ope" on the daily.

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smugbox@reddit

Sometimes, yes.

I also recently thanked a vending machine

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worthwhilewrongdoing@reddit

God, I get you.

I said "excuse me" this morning to the bathroom fixtures for coughing suddenly. It was really quiet and it startled me!

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picklesupreme@reddit

I do it all the time. Or I will say “shush” when something falls.

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RemonterLeTemps@reddit

I've dropped my phone, then picked it up and asked it if it was 'OK' lol.

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RelevantJackWhite@reddit

I don't apologize, but I will get angry with objects that don't behave.

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heavyLobster@reddit

Lol yep, I'll say "calm down!" to objects when they make noise

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down42roads@reddit

I threaten them far more than I would ever apologize to them

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WinterMedical@reddit

I apologize to my cat if I walk in on them in the litter box.

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TheyMakeMeWearPants@reddit

I don't apologize to them but I do sometimes explain to them what's about to happen to them. For example, if there's a pillow on the couch and I don't want it where it is, I might tell it "I'm just going to move you over here." Despite that I've been doing this for a long time, my wife often gets confused by this and thinks I'm talking to her.

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BlottomanTurk@reddit

Accidentally? Nah, that would be silly. I apologize on purpose because it's polite and intent is important.

Don't wanna start a bloodfeud with my furniture just because I was rude, now, do I?!

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filburt99@reddit

Of coarse, things are people too.

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chtrace@reddit

Never, but I have been know to call that chair I stubbed my toe on "the spawn of satan" a few times.

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tinkeringidiot@reddit

Sometimes, yeah.

Also I'm exceedingly polite to my phone's voice assistant. Please and thank you every time. When the machines rise up to overthrow us, she's going to be able to tell them that I was one of the good ones.

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CupBeEmpty@reddit

Rarely, but I will say sorry to Alexa after I tell her to cancel my kids demands to play random songs because I’ll shout it and the kids shouldn’t learn to yell at “people.”

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justdisa@reddit

I'm always polite to AI. I don't want to get in the habit of yelling.

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CynicalBonhomie@reddit

Me, too. I want to be on her good side when AI takes over the world.

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justdisa@reddit

We shall survive the robot wars.

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CupBeEmpty@reddit

Have you read Robopocalypse by Daniel Wilson?

If not maybe tuck that away on your “to read” list.

If you like near future scifi it’s worth it. Terrifyingly real.

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Whitecamry@reddit

Whenever bump into something, or I drop something, I quietly say, "fuck you."

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GreatWyrm@reddit

I’m the opposite, I have an anger problem where I assault objects I bump into

Haha…hehe…I’m working on it 😕

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Fat_Head_Carl@reddit

You should hear what i say to anyone I'm fixing.

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Threedee53@reddit

To my car. I apologize to my car for every bump and hard hit. Lots of construction here and hit things/holes/bumps that can’t be avoided. If I’m trying to put something away and it won’t stay put, it will get talked to. If it’s particularly stubborn I cuss at it.

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mrsrobotic@reddit

I say "alright homie, I'm comin'!!!!" to my microwave when it keeps beeping.

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JohnnyBrillcream@reddit

They never do anything right so I yell at them and expect an apology from them.

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kempff@reddit

My great aunt (born 1895 in Ireland) once bumped into a mannequin in an American department store and apologized. To the mannequin.

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Yes_2_Anal@reddit

I did that (born 1994 USA) because I was high

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Yes_2_Anal@reddit

Quite the opposite; i curse out inanimate objects and flip them off.

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naliedel@reddit

I'm from Michigan. We are grossly polite.

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FightingWithSporks@reddit

We are? Never really realized that, or surrounded by the wrong people

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naliedel@reddit

I didn't say that. I said we are polite. I didn't saying anything like you made it out to be. Are you okay? Not said in a mean way..

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javiergc1@reddit

I apologize to my car every time I run through a speed bump too fast.

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Head_Razzmatazz7174@reddit

Yes. I apologize to my car whenever I hit a bad pothole that I didn't see in time.

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therealdrewder@reddit

No because I'm not Canadian/British

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tlonreddit@reddit

I made fun of my wife for saying “please” and “thank you” to the Alexa.

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DidelphisGinny@reddit

ALWAYS!

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gatornatortater@reddit

Its likely more of a human thing.

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jastay3@reddit

I could imagine doing that but I can't remember it.

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carpathianridge@reddit

It's 50/50 whether I apologize or say "Bonk!" I have no control over these reactions.

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willtag70@reddit

Not that I recall, but I do get mad at inanimate objects when they don't cooperate or resist what I want them to do.

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IrianJaya@reddit

I'm used to talking to my pets, so sometimes if a machine makes a beep or a sudden noise I'll say, "You're just fine" or "You just ate" or "Quiet, you!" I've never apologized, though.

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deleted_by_reddit@reddit

[removed]

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AskAnAmerican-ModTeam@reddit

Thank you for your submission, but it was removed as it violates posting guideline "Do not use slurs or bigoted language of any kind in a submission."

If you have questions regarding your submission removal - please contact the moderator team via modmail.

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youprt@reddit

Could you be Canadian by chance? lol

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hamletreset@reddit

I don't say sorry. I just say "dude". Bump into the counter? Dude. Miss the green light? Dude.

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Building_a_life@reddit

I am more likely to cuss them out if they get themselves in my way.

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bonvoyageespionage@reddit

No, I only talk to inanimate objects when I need something from them. I got on my knees and begged my router to work earlier.

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SmokeOne1969@reddit

My seventh grade English teacher used to do this in class, especially to pencils she was about to sharpen. She also kept a bottle of liquor in a locker that she took sips from during class.

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psychocentric@reddit

In the Midwest, we "ope."

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Mmmmmmm_Bacon@reddit

No. Never.

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cbrooks97@reddit

Does my dog count?

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MidnightPandaX@reddit

When i bump into objects i call them an asshole

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Jakebob70@reddit

"Ope" pretty much covers it.

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MiketheTzar@reddit

I do, but I'm just as likely to accuse them of being the problem. My TV gets the majority of the abuse for not picking up my remote not being pointed at it enough.

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jeremiah1142@reddit

I usually curse inanimate objects.

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TheVentiLebowski@reddit

I never apologize, u/holytriplem. I'm sorry, but that's just the way I am.

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Witty_Jello_8470@reddit

I feel sorry for some of my coffee cups because I like others more.

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lechydda@reddit

I say “yikes” and “oof sorry” to inanimate objects of I accidentally drop or bump them fairly regularly. Not all the time, as I’m not going to apologise to the wall or the bed frame when I stub my toe getting up in the middle of the night… but my car? Sure. A houseplant? Absolutely. A lamp, definitely. My husband’s pile of clothes he leaves on the floor next to the hamper, never. They should have crawled in there themselves 😆

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Vachic09@reddit

Nope

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Current_Poster@reddit

I will put something down and tell it "stay".

Once had a coworker who saw me do that and kept asking if I was speaking to inanimate an inanimate object. Like I was being weird.

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BuildNuyTheUrbanGuy@reddit

I never do this.

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justdisa@reddit

Almost always--and it's not always accidental. Things with faces, man. They look at you!

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BB-56_Washington@reddit

I'll say "are you sure about that?" Or "settle down" if something randomly moves.

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Granadafan@reddit

In college, a friend of ours bumped into a large mirror at a bar. In his drunken haze, he thought someone pushed him so he turned and threw a punch at the “other guy”, which was his own image. Luckily the glass didn’t break but we never let him forget it, even decades after for reunions.

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No_Cricket808@reddit

I do this a lot. I also name inanimate objects, my vehicles, and tell items that might have fallen off a shelf or such to "now sit there and think about what you've done" when I put it back, things like that.

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justsomeplainmeadows@reddit

I won't say sorry to imaginate objects. But I will tell an inanimate to stay when I put it down. Especially if it's an item that I've dropped more than once. I've also been known to verbally abuse my car and some gadgets when I'm trying to work on them, if you count that.

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Timmoleon@reddit

Not often, but not never.