I’m disappointed with my response to danger.

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selldivide@reddit

Order of priorities:

Protect yourself
Protect your family
Protect your community

If your family wasn’t cooperating, you weren’t yet free to worry about other people at the beach.

At any rate, nobody was harmed, and now you have a test scenario to learn from. Frame it as success.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Thank you. I needed to hear that. Especially since they all seem to think I was overreacting.

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People in general are morons when in a group think setting. If no one panics then everyone is calm, if like 10 people out of 1000 panic and run then suddenly everyone is running. Also no one respects lightning but it literally can make you explode at random.

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NickolasBeeigler1448@reddit

You are definitely over reacting and are a huge pussy

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Chiarapet90@reddit

I think you’re awesome and you did great. Even if it didn’t occur to you right away, you did the right thing.

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ameliagarbo@reddit

But your sister didn't warn anybody, just made fun of you for not doing more? That stinks.

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ResuscH2K@reddit

If they think you were overreacting, I’d focus on making my family more educated/intelligent when it comes to physics.

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Cannabis_Breeder@reddit

As someone who has had lightning strikes within a stones throw … lightning isn’t something you want to fuck with

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2tusks@reddit

I was in a dangerous situation last week and was shocked at my reaction to it. After getting over the initial fear, I was angry at myself for not taking more decisive action. And I always thought I knew how I would handle myself in that type of situation. I just goes to show you how easily fear and panic can drive decision making. I finally decided to relegate the experience to a lesson learned.

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ProvincialPrisoner@reddit

I had an instructor at my academy. Guy is a US veteran. His patrol hit an IED. Guy made 3 TQs and knew approximately where the nearest patrol would intersect. He dragged himself miles to be found. Most people might skull off and think the story was BS. Until you meet him and he's instructing you and you see that he has 3 prosthetics. You can choose to believe him or not. The reality of the matter is, me and everyone in my class believed him.

He said there was no training to truly prepare him for that scenario. You get some medical training, you get firearms training. He said the only way he could be prepared for that was mentally thinking about it and how he would respond. What we took from that in our training from him was, some things you cannot physically prepare for. But to have a chance, you have to mentally prepare for. Sometimes that makes the difference.

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Every-Celery170@reddit

As a vet, myself, I’ve had to think through some of these scenarios. Even if something doesn’t happen, could it? We’ve been trained to react. My brain runs in a million different directions, and yes, I may sound crazy, but I’ve already planned for X, Y, Z, and A. Even then though, there are scenarios I haven’t played out & could fathom; that scares me. When I’m at a show, or large event, I always find the exits & think of a strategy should SHTF, meeting place, etc. I don’t think that’s ever wrong to be prepared, as such. Worst case, you’re slightly more prepared than everybody else. Best case, you were slightly more prepared than everybody else…

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TNShadetree@reddit

Large crowds always make me think of exits that aren't the way I came in. When people panic, they instinctively head for the way they came in. Realizing there's an exit through the kitchen can save your life when the herd bolts for the front.

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whowanderarenotlost@reddit

I always sit facing the door, and watch the room.

I kept my gear and a couple of left over MRE's in my vehicle, especially my sleeping bag in the winter months in Colorado Springs extreme cold and blizzards were a thing.

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Every-Celery170@reddit

Ugh, don’t even get me started on the MRE’s. I haven’t eaten one in years, but I have them everywhere, along with a lifestraw. I purchased a couple of boxes for my family some years back given they keep for so long & have heater packs. What gear did you specifically keep in your car? I was a medic so I also keep medical supplies, but that’s it other than the above.

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whowanderarenotlost@reddit

I had a case from my service time in the mid 80's ... about 10 yrs ago a racoon got in my garage and ATE THE ENTIRE BOX, EVERYTHING EDIBLE

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Every-Celery170@reddit

NOOO! Poor guy probably couldn’t poo for days!

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ProvincialPrisoner@reddit

If there is nothing my gf learns and retains from me. I hope it's first aid and situational awareness.

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Every-Celery170@reddit

Good on you, brother! First aid is huge. And trying to prepare others takes a lot of energy, so I truly applaud you. The skill is just as valuable as the supplies we may have. I really think more people should have advanced first aid training (BLS), and self-defense training, especially as a woman.

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ProvincialPrisoner@reddit

💯. Thank you. Self defense and first aid are tools to aid yourself in daily living.

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

Learn the skills you want, then practice them a little bit day after day so it's automatic. Don't try to cram. Just practice a few minutes regularly and after a while, you can do it without thinking very much

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supermarkise@reddit

Once in a while I'll ask people - quick, where is the nearest fire extinguisher? I hope that once they ask themselves that and need a fast answer it'll be there.

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

I remember a nurse asked my late husband if he carried candy for low blood sugar (diabetic). He said yes. She said "show me!" He did have some in his pocket, but she said other veterans rarely did, thus, her approach

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VikingTeo@reddit

Would you share what the dangerous situation was? And you reaction?

I think testimony like this is worth more than all the 'if x happens I will do y' YouTube videos

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2tusks@reddit

I was being followed by a car. My reaction was that I kept thinking I was paranoid and overreacting. It was very obvious that I was being followed from almost the beginning. I ended up driving to a business that was run by men.

I wish I had caught on sooner. It was a powerful learning experience.

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capt-bob@reddit

I feel you , but I think quick reaction to the unexpected is a skill you have to build. I've dropped the ball a couple times too, but I think I'm getting better. I've caught a cup I knocked off a table before, but didn't realize someone was in danger until too late before also.

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ian17901@reddit

This^

I’m surprised at how calmly I react to car accidents at this point in my life, but I’ve been around enough of them (I guess I’m unlucky, or maybe really lucky since I always seem to be 50 feet away from them when they happen,) that my response is somewhat robotic. Pull over, open trunk to get kit, start assessing injuries and the situation, prioritize victims. It’s all pretty automatic at this point. You can train all you want, and it helps, but constant exposure is the only way you can really respond to this stuff in a really calm manner.

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dexterfishpaw@reddit

To your sister: my response was not perfect, but at least I responded.

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PurplePickle3@reddit

I’d rather people think I’m crazy and always wrong, then just be right once. Fuck people’s opinions. My family is NOT a group I want to say “I told you so” to. They can think you/we/all of us are crazy…….. bc you have to be alive to have an opinion at all.

You did the right thing. Don’t second guess yourself and don’t change how you’ll respond next time.

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ultrapredden@reddit

I agree. However, I do wonder about the effectiveness of being the "crazy one" that is often wrong. At some point, I imagine people would just blow me off as crazy and ignore me. Credibility counts for something.

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PurplePickle3@reddit

Understood, however…Power goes out and shelves are empty, and you roll up with an extra genny and some food…. They aren’t gonna turn you away bc you’re crazy. Also I’m talking about my family. We all think all of the other ones are crazy already. We still all have great relationships.

Also in this context I’m not talking about claiming the world is gonna end bc of the Mayan calendar and then everyone waking up the next morning. I mean being wrong in the sense that… I don’t have a reason to tell you to get out of the water, to use this specific example.

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drthvdrsfthr@reddit

this is me haha for myself, i’ll be a lot more risky. but for my family, i always err on the side of caution and they will sometimes roll their eyes. i have to remind them, everything is fine until it isn’t.

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war_against_myself@reddit

I wholeheartedly agree. I will 100% weather any "you're crazy," eye rolls, exasperated sighs, or whatever else. I know when the chips are down I will have done what I needed to take care of people I care about, and that is all that matters.

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stpg1222@reddit

You did great. First, you recognized the danger, and you seem to be the only one that did so give yourself a lot of credit for that.

You also worked to get your family to a safe location. Maybe you could have picked a safer location, but you found a safer location than being in the water.

You also had your priorities straight. You focused on your family first. You can't be responsible for everyone all of the time so you have to prioritize. It would have taken a huge effort to get a crowd of people to understand the danger and take appropriate action, I don't think it is realistic to expect yourself to have done more than you did.

In a dangerous situation we rarely react perfectly. Each time you're in a situation like that you learn and grow and hone your instincts. Take this as a win in recognizing danger and acting but also learn things you could have done better and you'll be even better prepared next time.

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TheLonestead@reddit

It's hard to break thru social norms.

My aunt thought her FIL was sleeping in a chair and didn't want to bother him, but he likely just had a heart attack and later discovered him dead the next time she saw him.

I was walking home from middle school and crossed the road toward my house. I saw a woman up ahead with a small black dog and decided to cross back across the street to give them a wide berth. She ended up crossing over to my side too. I should have crossed back over, because I'd have to anyway, but that might have seemed social weird. So there was a 'social block' in doing so. Then she took the dog inside her house right before I was to cross their paths...but the dog got out the door, ran up, and bit me.

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smellswhenwet@reddit

Having been bit a couple times, we do learn from experience.

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HorseLover_Phatt@reddit

That's because you were, and still are

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starsandmath@reddit

I have a friend who works in disaster recovery and recommends "The unthinkable: who survives when disaster strikes" to just about everyone. Spoiler alert, it's the people who get the hell out of dodge when they sense that something isn't right. It's the people who are "overreacting" who survive.

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Gal_Monday@reddit

I was going to recommend this book as well. It is really true. Just knowing the 4Ds (eg, Denial, Dithering) and how those inhibit your ability to take action is super helpful. Normalcy Bias is also a really helpful concept.

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adroitus@reddit

Things usually work out and are okay. Until they aren’t. It doesn’t take much to go from near miss to complete disaster. Just ask Donald Trump.

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the_gato_says@reddit

Had the a similar thing happen to me, except there were only kids in the pool with adults talking and watching from the side. I yelled and got my daughter out of the water. My dad and BIL scoffed at me. I didn’t yell for any of the other kids to get out of the pool as their parents were right there and saw the same things I did, but I guess I should have told everyone to get out. A couple minutes later when it really started storming everyone did.

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CypherCake@reddit

That's ignorance on their part. I know it's frustrating, and it's hard to fix.

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LeatherTooler@reddit

If they still believe you overreacted, Show your wife and children(if old enough) the videos that people took of their 'fun' hair just before being struck. The ones where they survived at least. There are many where they did not.

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Retardfrogfish@reddit

Protect your nuggies

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ChevyOverland1597@reddit

Please put on your own oxygen mask before helping others. You cant help others if you arent taken care of it may feel selfish sometimes but its the only way.

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OnTheEdgeOfFreedom@reddit

That comment may have gotten a lot of upvotes, but it doesn't apply here.

I'm not being critical of OP - I've screwed up my share of emergency responses - but in hindsight, the thing to have done would have been to scream at everyone at once that lightning was coming and people should get to shelter - and then run like hell for the car. No reason to separate 2 & 3 here.

Also, in some cultures, you'd have points 1 & 2 out of order. Men were expected to protect their wife and children at the expense of their own lives. But that's not really how a lot of Americans seem to think anymore so I suppose it's moot. And it doesn't apply to OP's situation anyway.

OP, in reality you couldn't have done much better - once the air is that charged, a strike could happen in milliseconds or minutes, and you can't know which. For all you knew you barely had time to yell and run for shelter, let alone stay and argue. This is a good time to reinforce a family lesson - if any adult or responsible child says to run, the family runs first and asks why once they are running.

Where I live, lightning storms happen just about every evening this time of year. I'm taking OP's post as a reminder to review safety rules and maybe put up some lightning rods.

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war_against_myself@reddit

This is a good time to reinforce a family lesson - if any adult or responsible child says to run, the family runs first and asks why once they are running.

I cannot express this enough - your family will not do this by default. They will not do this after trying this one time, two times, three times, etc. You need to do this a lot. Especially with children 7 and under. Good reminder!

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

Our phrase is "we've got to go right NOW "

don't argue, just GO and explain later

I set this up because my husbands (my late husband especially) argue with me due to lingering cultural norms in my age group.

We review it and practice the phrase.

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Ordinary_Awareness71@reddit

Cops I know out here have code words that they'll drop into conversation when something is not right. It's their way of telling their spouse either "it's about to get ugly here, get yourself and the kids to safety while I engage the threat" or "follow me, we're leaving right now, no arguments" depending on the situation.

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

Thanks for this comment. I will discuss this with my husband some more.

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Ordinary_Awareness71@reddit

My pleasure and good luck!

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ProvincialPrisoner@reddit

I worry about this with my significant other. There have been times before where we've been in some kind of threatening scenario. And have issued somewhat of a command to get behind me or follow me.

Sometimes by tone of voice she'll know that for me I'm clearly reacting that it is Paramount. Other times she may stop to question me.

I just hope that if something is happening that she doesn't stop to question me in a time where a reaction is important

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

Try setting up a code phrase! The rule is that you only use it when clearly reviewing it (practice!), or in an actual emergency . I set this up when these public shootings got more common, even though I keep in mind that our own risk is really low. Arguing or explaining is later . It would be nice to have more than one code phrase, but that exceeds my mental capacity

Nobody likes to be bossed around, was my thinking. And when you bark an order, it's kinda rude.

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A_Big_Igloo@reddit

My understanding of the priorities is more about capacity when it comes to 1 and 2. Like with the overhead air on a plane. The adult does themselves first so they don't pass out, then once they have Airflow they can help the kid. If the kid has already passed out, the mask will still help them, but if the adult passes out while fiddling with the kids mask, both of them are going to pass out.

Likewise, if I am in danger which is seperate from my family, I need to secure myself in order to allow myself enough security to assist my family. I am of no help to anyone dead. Conversely, if everyone is experiencing an equal threat (the trump shooter death is a good example this), my job is to take on danger at the benefit of my family.

Self bring first is more about maintaining capacity to help others, which is the primary goal, it's not literally "I'm going to save myself at the expense of my family"

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CypherCake@reddit

Yeah that seemed like a really ungenerous take on it.

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A_Big_Igloo@reddit

I'm thinking there's some anti American bias at play there.

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

Or anti young people

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siredgar@reddit

This is a good time to reinforce a family lesson - if any adult or responsible child says to run, the family runs first and asks why once they are running.

This, this, all of this. If nothing else, this.

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Pineydude@reddit

Not only that but people are stupid you can’t be responsible for others stupidity. Natural selection sounds kind of harsh, but the stupid stuff I see people do everyday is mind boggling

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austinrob@reddit

This.

First responders are taught "Me, Us, Them". If you don't care for yourself, you can't care for your team, who then can't care for anyone else.

Me.
Us.
Them.

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kippirnicus@reddit

This is a good response.

He’s exactly right. Take everything as a life lesson, and you’ll be a lot happier.

Just the fact that you’re upset about this, tells me you’re a good person.

Learn, and let it go. ✌️💕

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DoraDaDestr0yer@reddit

This. 100% this, you did everything you could, and recognized there was still more to do. This is the perfect response and analysis of the situation.

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Cute-Consequence-184@reddit

This!

There have been families to lose members in tornados because their claustrophobia stopped them from going into a shelter.

My mother was claustrophobic and my father had a special room built for tornados. During bad weather, she would put us kids into the room then sit outside on a chair waiting until the storm was over.

You honestly can't save those who don't want to be saved

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Leather-Air-602@reddit

Pet your Barbies big boy. You sound emotional.

[-]

preppers-ModTeam@reddit

Your submission has been removed for breaking our rules on civility. Name calling and inflammatory posts or comments with the intent of provoking users into fights will not be tolerated.

If the mod team feels that you are generally unhelpful and causing unnecessary confrontation, you will be banned. If you feel you are being trolled, report the comment and do not respond or you will be banned also. Feel free to contact the moderators if you would like clarification on the removal reason.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Pet your zeros and ones bot. You seem like a troll lol.

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Leather-Air-602@reddit

A bot or a troll? Make up your mind.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

You’re right. People never make bots to troll. What was I thinking?! I was obviously just murdered by words. I’ll delete my account now. I’m so ashamed.

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Leather-Air-602@reddit

Is everything always about you?

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Oh double murder. How will I recover?

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Leather-Air-602@reddit

you gotta get your testosterone checked .

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onedelta89@reddit

I remember taking a storm spotter class where they showed a photo of two teenage girls laughing and making faces while their hair stood straight up. We were told that those girls were killed moments later by a lightning strike. Nobody recognized the danger til it was too late.

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Rynoalec@reddit

In my household/family I worked to establish a known code word, that when used signifies that the situation calls for an immediate attention and trust given to the speaker, including following instructions and doing so calmly and without argument or even questioning, with an understanding that an explanation will be given as soon as possible, but at a later time. Of course, this should NEVER be abused or over used. Our code word is Zombie Apocalypse. "Hey, guys, Zombie Apocalypse I need you to get out of the water right now and follow me please. "

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Velvetmaggot@reddit

Hindsight can be a pesky poltergeist…but you remained calm. That’s a skill that many can’t be taught.

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Dream_Fever@reddit

Flight, fight and FREEZE are apparently the things we do ☹️ Personally freeze seems to be my setting. Everyone has their own thing. I’m disappointed in the way that I’ve handled violence. Tbf to each his own, don’t let it eat you up.

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Citizen4000@reddit

I enjoyed your story

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BackFromMyBan@reddit

Yes tell like a madman from the shore at random people. Better yet, sprint around and get into peoples faces telling them then end is near and y’all have angered zues. Nah, just get your people out the way

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Competitive-Pop6530@reddit

IMHO, I’m also disappointed with your response. Terribly disappointed if I am completely honest.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Yeah, I did almost everything wrong.

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Easy-Tower3708@reddit

You kidding? If your story had happened to me I would've stopped everyone and showed them how cool it was my hair keep sticking up 🤣 for real, I didn't even know that warning sign so nice thinking.

Don't beat yourself up while you already down; watch something happy and have some tea ❤️

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OldStudentChaplain@reddit

You did the best you could do period. Next time you will do better. Next time your family will do better.

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Odd_Salt5345@reddit

Wow goosd srory

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deleted_by_reddit@reddit

[removed]

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deleted_by_reddit@reddit

[removed]

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preppers-ModTeam@reddit

Your submission has been removed for breaking our rules on civility.

Name calling and inflammatory posts or comments with the intent of provoking users into fights will not be tolerated.

If the mod team feels that you are generally unhelpful and causing unnecessary confrontation, you will be banned. If you feel you are being trolled, report the comment and do not respond or you will be banned also.

Feel free to contact the moderators if you would like clarification on the removal reason.

[-]

preppers-ModTeam@reddit

Your submission has been removed for breaking our rules on civility.

Name calling and inflammatory posts or comments with the intent of provoking users into fights will not be tolerated.

If the mod team feels that you are generally unhelpful and causing unnecessary confrontation, you will be banned. If you feel you are being trolled, report the comment and do not respond or you will be banned also.

Feel free to contact the moderators if you would like clarification on the removal reason.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Do you mind if I delegate this? I feel terrible. But I understand if you want it there first prosperity

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Well fuck. Now I feel like an asshole.🤦‍♀️

Please forgive me. Right before you was a troll who had my hackles up. This is a sensitive subject for me and people being flippant is rather painful. I obviously read you wrong. Again. Please forgive me. 🙏🏻

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WittyTitle5450@reddit

let survival of the fittest do its thing.

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Specialist-Risk-5004@reddit

This is why every emergency agency does drills and practice. Totally normal human behaviour. But, you are aware and will improve.

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No-Signal-4688@reddit

About a year ago, I was at a kids’ outdoor sporting event when it was getting stormy. They delayed for a period, then started the event. Shortly thereafter, we noticed everyone’s hair standing up. After mentioning this to a good number of spectators and parents, no one really seemed concerned. Is this not a known safety red flag to the general public? Am I missing some nuance in which maybe this shouldn’t be a cause for concern?

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InsanityLurking@reddit

Kinda reminds me of one of my shark encounters. I was at a surf camp in myrtle Beach, maybe 12 or 13. Day 3 or 4 maybe, I was starting to get good at it, could stand up without tanking into the waves, had just rode a good 4 foot wave in and was feeling good just paddling back out to the start point where everyone else was. I made it maybe 30 yards from shore when I looked up to see that I had almost collided a black tip reef sharks fin that was poking out of the water, maybe 3 inches from the tip of my board. I froze, pulled my arms and legs out of the water, and waited. It waited. A small eternity later another good wave came and pushed me back to shore. I called out the shark warning to everyone, but for the most part they weren't concerned. The shark moved on but I stayed on shore for another 20 mins just to be sure. They all thought I was over reacting, but fuck it going off the size of the fin that boy was at least a 6 footer. I want playing around that day. Overall 12/10 experience but got dam did I about shit bricks on that beach.

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jayjayell008@reddit

Experience is the best teacher.

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Not_ThatRich@reddit

Not at all where I thought that was going.

Just do better next time.

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Odd_Salt5345@reddit

Meant good story

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Bubbly_Wolverine3352@reddit

It doesn’t feel real when it’s happening- a potentially dangerous situation. So your normal response is to do the smart thing but not to overreact because part of you is in disbelief. You reacted in a normal way. Do NOT beat yourself up over this. Life is a learning process, we are not an expert in every new experience/situation we come across so we won’t handle them like experts. You do your best at the time and learn for the next time. Posting here to talk about this tells me it’s really bothering you. Which makes it obvious that you are a good person trying to do the right things. You’re good buddy— keep up the great work. Let this go and move on w your life🌈❤️

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blackkittencrazy@reddit

We all could have done something better at some point. That moment is over. You'll do something different in the next. Move on. Can you help any of the other people now? No? Move on. Dont do it again. Learn from thos experience. Teach others how to do something right. Become a cpr instructor or first aid instructor.

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The300Bros2@reddit

Okay. Life is about learning. Some things you can only learn by experience regardless of how many stories you hear from others. The next time you face a situation you will remember and act according to what you now have decided. I’m not saying you should pay attention to the sister’s mocking tho. At the end of the day you acted and she did not. Her opinion doesn’t matter. Most likely she will do nothing the next time too. It’s like you’re an Olympic athlete in running & someone who never ran in their life is making jokes about how you practice/compete.

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Jose_De_Munck@reddit

Every person is different. I was on a beach once and my mom told me there was a lady floating face down in the water...I turned down my head to see, and something snapped. I threw my loved Rayban sunglasses on her lap, and started running like a madman to the place the lady was. In a few seconds I was swimming like a dolphin, took her by the hair to take her face off the water, but she was dead-eyed already. Turned her and grabbed by the neck with a lifesaver hug, and dragged her to the beach. When I was going out, another guy came and helped me. Then another woman (daughter?) came screaming, and another guy pushed her and started to give her CPR. My mom was already picking up our stuff, calling it a day. She said that "I should not have intervened because police would want to talk to me later". I was so disappointed of those words, that our relationship was never the same. I mean, she shouldn't be proud instead? no, but if it was her favorite son, my brother, she would make the State give him a medal even though the lady was already dead. Don't be EVER ashamed of what you do. At least you did something. The other families should be smart enough to see if a group of people is leaving the water in a rush is for some reason.

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Kadddo@reddit

It was a success because nobody got hurt and you got to learn something and feel it deep too. Next time you will be a hero for sure.

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erad67@reddit

Was a live & learn experience. Luckily, nobody was hurt in your learning experience. Be thankful of that and move on.

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No-Animator-3832@reddit

You are in no more danger standing in the water than you are standing on the ground.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

That’s not what a number of resources say. Though I was safer than under that damn tree!

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Straxicus2@reddit

Excellent job at recognizing the signs and acting appropriately. The first comment has it right. You were working on step 2.

Now you’ve had this “dry run” you can figure out what you did wrong and be better prepared next time.

Plus, now your family knows what it looks like when a lightning strike is possible.

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Ok-Cryptographer7080@reddit

Few men are born brave. Many become so through training and force of discipline.

Publius Flavius Vegetius Renatus

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HorseLover_Phatt@reddit

You sound batshit insane. Good luck to your family in putting up with you

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Really? Lol!

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HorseLover_Phatt@reddit

Yes really, the type of person who has Munchausen and will embarrass your kids for making up bullshit scenarios in your head. Go see a therapist, not the canned food aisle

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Are you okay?

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HorseLover_Phatt@reddit

Yes, I am fantastic. So good I don't make a hobby out of my mental illness reigning in the apocalypse on my poor children

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

This is hilarious ❤️

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d4rkh0rs@reddit

You did really good.

You didn't do great but you learned.

Take your win.

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Accomplished_Ball661@reddit

Fuck em, you did fine.

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Mud3107@reddit

I was out on my parents boat with them one day. Storm had rolled through just north of the lake we were on. We sitting in the northern corner of the lake just chilling and similar happened to us. Mine and my mother’s hair started standing up, Dads bald.

I yell out my dad to hit the gas and go! He looks at me and says “Why?”. I yell just go! There’s a charge in the air it could be lightning! He just looks at me and barely puts the boat in drive. I yell please go! And he just sits puttering along. I’m absolutely dumbfounded. I’m pleading to go and he just is meandering along. Then says well we can’t outrun lightning. No but we can get out of the area before it strikes. A huge clap of thunder sounds from not far away. The charge goes away.

I still get angry thinking about how he responded to that to this day.

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redrae707@reddit

I mean.... swimming during a thunderstorm was the first mistake LOL

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Oh I wouldn’t do that. This came out of nowhere.

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Ordinary_Awareness71@reddit

Well, you're five steps ahead of me. I wouldn't even have gotten the charged air thing, being in an area where lightning pretty much never strikes. Aside from that, I've heard both things about the trees and the car and have been told by people that one was good and the other wasn't and then someone else says the opposite. So like I said, steps ahead of me.

Aside from that, my view is that you're the patriarch of the family and it is your job to protect your family. Maybe you *COULD* have yelled "get out now, lightning inbound" to your family and hoped others picked up on it too, but unless you're the lifeguard or some other figure responsible for the area's safety, that's not your concern. Heck, even cops don't have a legal obligation to stop crime (Reginald Denny v. LAPD).

You got your family out, that's what matters.

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Numerous-Pear-8090@reddit

Geez you are being hard on yourself. When adrenaline is pumping through your body, it isn't easy to think straight. You got them out of the water. The tree is not good but you were trying to shelter them. Honestly, you did more than most who wouldn't even see the charge in the air.

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AdditionalAd9794@reddit

What's the threat level when lightning strikes water. Obviously not everything fries, as you'd see tons of dead fish afterwards. Is the danger only in the immediate vicinity of the strike, within 50 feet, 100 feet? Or does it depend on the strength of the lightning strike, Obviously.

I'm just curious to if the people in the water were in any danger, and to what degree.

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Tai9ch@reddit

This is one of those risks that's way over-hyped.

People do get struck by lightining and die while swimming, but if anything it seems to be less dangerous than standing on land in the open. It's certainly less dangerous than being on a boat.

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CulpablyRedundant@reddit

Yeah, I'd only be worried if it was a very small body of water. It's only more dangerous on a boat because the lightning can possibly find a path through the hull and then you're sinking. I spend a lot of time on sailboats and am rarely worried about getting struck by lightning even with 53' of aluminum above my head.

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BentGadget@reddit

I've seen advice to hook a jumper cable to the mast and dangle the other end in the water.

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CulpablyRedundant@reddit

That's not great advice. The mast is grounded, but the question is always how well is it grounded? Practical Sailor did an extensive article on grounding and one thing that stuck with me was they suggested never running ground wires at a sharp angle. Use gentle curves so the energy stays in the wire and doesn't jump straight to the water. Unfortunately, it still usually fries all of the electronics

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less_butter@reddit

Lightning tries to find a path from the air to the ground. If you are standing in fresh water, your body is that path - the electrolytes in your body mean you are a better conductor of electricity than the surrounding water.

The reason fish aren't affected by lightning is the same reason birds don't get electrocuted when landing on a power line. There's no path through them to the ground. That's what kills you.

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HaydeaseUK@reddit

According to the British diving organisation, 5m (15ft) is bad, but up to 100m (300ft) an be dangerous.

It also seems that if you can get completely submerged, you are safer, although timing that would be difficult I guess (without an oxygen tank on your back!).

Fish generally don’t get killed unless they are at the surface.

https://www.bsac.com/news-and-blog/divers-on-the-storm/?&&type=rfst&set=true#cookie-widget

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CAD007@reddit

You sensed danger. You correctly identified the source of the danger. You took the best action you knew at the time to deal with the danger. You debriefed afterwards to learn more about the danger for next time.

One universal truth about any emergency preparedness is most around you will scoff or laugh because they don’t believe the threat is real, or is happening to them until too late. Do your best to warn, but quickly return to your plan of action to save those who will trust you and listen. There is no time to waste.

If you sometimes misjudge or get lucky and the threat does not develop, have confidence in knowing you were prepared and would have mitigated any damage. Every dry run is a chance to evaluate, test, and learn.

You did just fine in your action.

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MojoVibes@reddit

Don’t feel bad about not helping the others, you have to help yourself and your family first every time. Take it as a learning experience but don’t beat yourself up bro you still did very well in my opinion

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Adol214@reddit

I would add that getting a crowd to act take carisma and convincing, especially without creating a panic.

We don't want to look ridicule by creating an unnecessary scene, and in my area it can even bring you legal trouble would someone get hurt during the panic.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

Thank you.

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elramirezeatstherich@reddit

Thanks for sharing. I had to negotiate safety with lightning today too!! I was driving to walk a dog client who lives on high prairie ground when I saw a lone fork lighting strike about 5 km from the neighborhood I was heading too. The rain clouds weren’t thunderheads, just blankets of small rain clouds. There was zero other signs of lighting or thunder, so I tried my best to assess if we should still start our walk and how to plan the safest route through the neighbourhood while continuing to monitor the weather. All was good and zero other lightning or thunder.

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gardendesgnr@reddit

I live along Lightning Alley in FL which is I-4 Orlando in Seminole Co. Close to 10 people a yr die in FL from lightning, we are the lightning capital. Two homes in my subdivision alone have burned to the ground in the last 7 yrs from a lightning strike and a fire dept is 1/2 mi away! Onetime 20+ yrs ago I came home from work to find our desktop computer running weird, monitor w lines across the screen, a broken answering machine & cordless ph. My neighbors chainlink was hit and it was in contact w my house at my office room and neighbors house who had the corner of the cinder blocks blown out. It is very common for people to lose electronics, appliances etc to lightning here. We don't have tornado warning sirens but we do have sirens for lightning esp at parks & rec areas. Last yr or 2022 a woman died standing under a tree, next to a school bus stop, waiting on her kid. A few yrs ago, 3 people died in Tampa standing on concrete near a tree at Raymond James Stadium when lightning hit the tree.

I used to work at a little 11 acre nursery that is basically sunny hot sand w mostly dead huge tree trunks killed by lightning. I was normally pretty cautious about storms. There is no cover except at the very front where an old barn is and a little pole barn type structure and we mostly walked the place w only 1 JD Gator to share. Over the yrs though as temps started increasing yr after yr, storms would suddenly pop up w no warning or cloud line from the sea breeze. I got stuck one time at the pole barn and the lightning was striking the tree trunks, an electric wood pole and across the street at a lake. It was so intense myself and a co-worker didn't dare run out into the open to try to make it to the reg barn which was 1000' away. My car was 100' feet away under a huge tree and next to chain link. The hair on our arms was standing up and our ponytails out from our hats were poofed up. We were stuck there for 30 min till it calmed down enough to make a run for a truck a co-worker drove near us. Never ever again!!!

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lostinsnakes@reddit

I read your first few sentences and thought “huh, really?” and then remembered the time lightning hit my neighbors’ house and they had to find another rental. I flipped a light switch at that exact moment and got shocked by a blue charge.

My grandpa just had a strike between him and his neighbor’s house that fried his new car and messed his house up even though it touched neither.

Guess I need to look into lightning proofing my current house.

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gardendesgnr@reddit

Oh gawd the light switch shocking me in a lightning storm is a fear of mine! Years ago I standing at my kitchen sink making dinner, it was just starting to storm, and a huge flash & bang happened startling me. Lightning hit something in my back neighbors yard about 50' from my house.

In central FL our summer normal weather pattern is heat then storms brew up (either coastal sea breezes colliding or from heat & humidity) around 4-6pm. The sea breezes colliding happens often near I-4 area which is how it gets so much lightning. The last several yrs the pattern changed, more unusual heat (July Ave 95° record hot) and less storms. Lightning is definitely different too, now it sounds like a bomb and it wasn't till hurricane Debby passed w rain bands over us that I heard the rolling rumbling thunder we don't get much of now.

Your grandpa's house probably got lightning thru water pipes, electrical, sewer lines or other utilities from the neighbors side also getting hit. That is unusual about the car though!

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Kelekona@reddit

Do people's brains work properly under those conditions?

Then again, sometimes I get loopy just from pressure changes.

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myself248@reddit

Yeah, go to a science museum and volunteer for the demo where you stand on the insulated platform and put your hand on a Van de Graaf generator! You'll have a million volts of potential relative to the surroundings, your hair will poof right up (especially if the humidity is low), and all you have to do is not make any sudden moves so you don't knock over the platform.

But while you're up there, with your arms tingling and your hair doing weird stuff, you're completely fine. Joking with the presenter, posing for your friend in the audience with the camera, whatever. It doesn't affect your brain. They do these demos with a dozen people a day.

It helps if you have the longest finest hair in the audience, they're more likely to pick someone who'll make an epic puffball.

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mindfolded@reddit

A science museum is very different conditions than constant lightning and thunder.

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myself248@reddit

Point is, the brain is inside the skull, it isn't affected by electrostatic fields. It doesn't matter where the fields come from.

If someone finds thunderbolts and lightning very very frightening, that's a separate matter from the electrostatic charge itself.

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KShubert@reddit

1 for the Queen reference

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Kelekona@reddit

I did that, but I was having brain-fog issues back then.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

That’s terrifying

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Klutzy_Cap4975@reddit

Not an expert, but I think you did the right thing. In real, dangerous situations, the fear you're feeling is impacting your cerebral cortex and can make it difficult to think clearly or make decisions. It's incredible that you thought so quickly and got not only yourself but also your family out of there! No one was hurt and if anything like that happens again around other people you will be reminded to call out to them. Well done man!

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lil_chef77@reddit

As a Marine who has seen some things, don’t be too hard on yourself. Life itself is a learning experience. What is important is that you learn from your experiences and use that knowledge for the next time you find yourself faced with a threat.

Not one time did I expect many of the hardest moments I’ve faced. I always think back about what I could have done differently at the moment. Of all of the signs that I missed or didn’t get right. But I never realized until later in my life that it was never the knowing what to do per say that makes someone a survivor, but the ability to analyze your situations to disseminate a better outcome for the next time you find yourself fighting for your life.

Your post here shows what kind of person you already are. Keep learning and don’t be hard on yourself. You can’t be right all the time, but you can learn ways to minimize the damage to yourself and others.

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pretzelsRus@reddit

What a compassionate and helpful response

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Dull_Kiwi167@reddit

Always protect yourself first. Your family comes next. After that, you can worry about others. You help as many as you can...but, you can't help anyone if you are the one that is taken out.

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strawberrysoup99@reddit

The fact that you reacted at all puts you in the top 5 percentile I'd wager. Don't beat yourself up.

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kait_1291@reddit

Please know that this was one reaction to one scenario.

Having been in multiple situations where danger is a very real and present threat, I have had a few different reactions, even when the danger and situations were similar/the same.

You got your family to safety, that's all that matters.

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mylifeisathrowaway10@reddit

The four car accidents I've been in have been around the same level of severity (fender benders or low-speed hits that I was able to drive away from), and my reactions varied wildly from nearly catatonic with freeze mode to literally reading a book while I waited for the initial adrenaline rush to subside (cop was already on scene and having a lengthy conversation with the other driver).

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kait_1291@reddit

Yep, exactly. These reactions can vary, you are not stuck in one type of reaction simply because you did that one first. The next time danger pops up, you could have a completely different reaction.

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twoplankerwanker@reddit

AZ. A.A A. yY 😁🌻😌😊😊(⁠T⁠T⁠):⁠0(⁠T⁠T⁠)(⁠⁠_⁠⁠)(⁠⁠_⁠⁠)=⁠-⁠O=⁠:⁠-⁠!(⁠⁠_⁠⁠)O⁠⁠o=⁠_⁠=:⁠-⁠$=⁠-⁠O S. A. Aaa ¢ AqQQQAaA.

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Anarcora@reddit

LIFE PRO TIP: KNOW THE LIGHTNING SQUAT

Place your feet tight together, heels touching, toes over one another, and squat as low as you possibly can. DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING OR ANYONE ELSE THAT IS ALSO TOUCHING GROUND.

Once the immediate danger passes, run like hell to shelter in a building that has electrical service and/or water pipes, or a motor vehicle. A picnic shelter or shed isn't likely appropriately grounded the way buildings with public utilities are.

Source: Information from National Park Service when up in high alpine tundra in what is essentially a thunderstorm nursery.

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SparrowLikeBird@reddit

I've never seen a fish or whale get struck by lightning. So, I think being in the water is probably ok

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melympia@reddit

Wanna bet your life on it?

Then again, I've never seen a dinosaur struck by lightning, so being the tallest thing in a thunderstorm is probably okay...

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SparrowLikeBird@reddit

I consider swimming in any large outdoor water to be betting my life. which is why I don't do that.

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melympia@reddit

Bit it's probably okay, isn't it?

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SparrowLikeBird@reddit

tons of people enjoy water outside. I used to as a kid.

But like, once you know what could be there (sharks, gators, catfish to swallow you whole, brain eating amoeba, bacteria, leaches....) ... its harder to have fun in it

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melympia@reddit

I feel ya. My father was.ince swept away in a riptide. Things at the beach aren't the same now as before.

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SparrowLikeBird@reddit

we were made to fear them as kids.... and then one of us got caught in one and our dad just hollered from the shore "ride it out! - swim once its done!"

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melympia@reddit

My famiky lives far inland. I didn't know what a riptide is until over a decade later. I just know that particular beach quite well, and knew how to tell which way the current goes. That one sucked my dad right away from the shore, but not in the upper foot or so of the water. Below that, however..

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ImJustHereForItt@reddit

Focus on the fact that you even knew what you did. A lot of people wouldn't even know what you did. Knowledge is power but useless without correct application. I think you did a good job on how you handled it.

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Suspicious-Agent8932@reddit

You almost have to have a scenario such as this happen to know what to do under such circumstances. It helps you later sort out what to do in another emergency. You don’t know how you will react the first time, now you have a baseline to work off of. You did well even KNOWING what was happening, give yourself a pat on the back. God looks out for fools and babes, everything worked out, don’t let someone rib you when nothing cataclysmic happened. Sometimes the best answer to such people is a ‘So?’ Or ‘So What?’ Answer over and over until they stamp their foot and walk away. Now, you know. Well done!

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chasonreddit@reddit

Lightning strikes are still rare. That's why the expression struck by lightning still connotes a rare event. You might have saved someone. You might have caused panic. But I applaud you trying.

I had a similar failure once. My niece (25 yo) jumped off my boat. And disappeared. I dithered. Then I started pulling off shoes and pants. Then she finally popped up at the other end. (it's a catamaran and she swam between the hulls) I wasn't so scared for her as for me having to tell her father.

At the time though, you see what you perceive as an emergency. You take the action you think necessary. You may over react, you may under react. Trust your instincts.

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mylifeisathrowaway10@reddit

In a crisis situation, you don't rise to the occasion, you fall back to your most ingrained training. You knew enough to get your family out of the area before the lightning struck even if you forgot the exact protocol. That's a good thing. Take this as a reminder to keep training your skills and knowledge so that it comes back to you when adrenaline shuts off the higher functions of your brain.

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Proud-Chart-9697@reddit

Continue to place yourself in dangerous situations and you will sharpen your responses a hundred fold. Like anything it takes the hours and the experience.

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Ticket2ride21@reddit

Let's start from the top shall we?

The fact that you had enough inclination to realize what was happening and try to save your family should make you proud. They might all think you're overreacting but should they find themselves in this situation again I'll bet you a buffalo nickel they draw on the knowledge that you taught them today. They may not know it now but you taught them (and yourself) a valuable lesson.

Let this be a good dry run for the real thing. What did you do right? What did you do wrong? How could you improve upon this?

Lastly (if I still have you) I'll leave you with a story of me in the same scenario only slightly different.

I should preface this with the fact that I've been around the ocean all my life. I can Captain anything under 50 ft and do it extremely safely. I started captaining my first vessel at the age of eight. I am intimately familiar with the ocean as it's where I find peace.

Now that that's out of the way I can get on with my story. A few years ago we were in Florida and the family and I were fishing the flats from our skiff (boat). Sometimes we will anchor the boat and wade (walk) across the shallow flats. Works out well as I fish them and my girls love to find all the cool critters/nature.

There we are wading across the flats when all of the water just starts being pulled very quickly out of the Bay. Our boat went from floating in 6 inches of water to dry land in moments.

My family was like "COOL!" And started exploring all the new ground. I panicked and yelled at them to "get your asses behind me NOW!" and started running towards land/buildings. When I turned around the wife and kid are just staring me....holding still by the skiff. They actually went AWAY from me and started picking things out of the boat with confused looks on their faces.

By now the water in the bay is being pulled out and there's more dry land that I've ever seen before even at the lowest tides. I can see everything. I can see abandoned crab traps and all the Deep Pockets in the flats. The water is rushing out of the Bay.

"WE HAVE NO TIME LEAVE IT ALL. BABY COME TO ME NOW PLEASE!" Sent my wife into actual panicked mode. She didn't necessarily know what was wrong but she saw me panicked and scared (which doesn't happen on the water with me) and grabbed our girl and started hauling ass to me.

We made it to shore covered in mud and mess and completely out of breath. I made it to a nearby marina where I got bait from and started to warn them when they told me it was some weird phenomenon. It took me a while to calm down. We eventually had to do the walk of shame back out to our boat which by then was floating again.

At the time I looked completely stupid and irrational. There was absolutely no amount of explaining tsunamis to my wife who was pretty pissed at me for scaring her.

When we got home I showed her footage from The Boxing Day tsunami. You could see the look of "ohhhh I see why he was paniced" wash over her face.

If you're still with me, and I hope you are, you should know that my whole family now knows about tsunamis and they know if the water gets sucked out to see you need to move your ass to dry and high ground.

I do understand geology and I do know very well about the continental shelf around the gulf that would protect us from tsunamis. Still....it's very unnerving to watch that water go out like that. You have that "I shouldn't be standing here" moment.

So yeah you're not alone. I too have had that moment. Maybe us looking dumb will save them one day.

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

I would have done the same as you.

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MinefieldExplorer@reddit

I’m shocked that in today’s era where information is so available, people still don’t know basic signs like static hair for lightning and receding water for tsunamis etc. Just from Hollywood movies, news articles, and random clips online… I’ve been exposed to all those kinds of “predanger” indicators without even seeking them out lol. I’d used to critique movies like “oh pah-leeze… no way those people would just stand there during that!” And then I realize that yes, a lot of people WOULD just stand there or take selfies etc.

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Virtual_Site_2198@reddit

It's not automatic, it's practice!! Emergency responders, soldiers etc do well in stressful, fast moving situations due to training and practice.

Learn stuff and practice it often so you can do it under stress. Short, frequent practice is better than like a weekend a year. (Just like for learning any skill)

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jacksonwhite@reddit

You did fine and learned something. As far as the other people on the beach I imagine they would have been calling for the mobile psych wagon if you started yelling get out of the water Jaws style for no reason.

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EngineerRemote2271@reddit

Most people run on autopilot for much of the day, so it's not surprising there is a lot of inertia when it comes to taking action. And then there is always indecision about what is actually an appropriate response. We saw this during Covid, nobody knew what to do because information was incomplete

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SubstantialStress561@reddit

That’s crazy! Was no one else’s hair also standing up? And for your to do that even when wet, it must have been a heck of a charge!

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Firefluffer@reddit

Well, I’ve been in the fire service for over a dozen years, firefighter-paramedic and you know why we’re good at dealing with emergencies? We practice, we create scenarios in our minds, we add them to training, we do after action reviews of calls… None of us are born with it.

Humans act off of scripts in our heads and if we don’t have a script, we do poorly. If we’re in a situation unlike anything we’ve done before, we often freeze.

My entire fire academy was running drill after drill of what to do if we were low on air, what to do if we were tangled in wires, what to do if we were pinned and couldn’t move… and we continue to drill those things over.

My paramedic program actually had paid actors to play the role of sick or injured patients so we could develop muscle memory and mental models for what to do in various situation. Every other year I have to go through training to refresh the most critical skills.

You can do this. Fire drills for your house, car crash drills, power outage drills, active shooter drills, home invasion drills, lost in the woods drills, injured or sick family member drills; start building those mental models and muscle memory for how to respond.

Think about the scenarios, come up with a plan, teach the plan, practice the plan.

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capt-bob@reddit

Your family barely listened to you , the other people would have acted like you were insane. It's true, lightning hits the tallest object for the shortest route to the ground, I think you did good realizing lightning was about to strike, you have to get used to responding to things, it's not natural. You need to plan out beforehand what to do in different situations to respond quickly. Think of it this way, you were the only one to react at all! Doing pretty good.

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funnysasquatch@reddit

This is a very common human reaction. Most people don’t actually respond to danger- even a fire in their unless they go through training.

It’s why if you are at work or even a hotel & they do a fire drill you leave the building. It conditions you to leave once you hear that alarm.

On an airplane- I check to see where the nearest exit is. And I think to myself what to do.

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ReactionAble7945@reddit

They do not really see you as a leader or they do not think you were serious by the way you said it.

Odds are you need to asses how they see you and deal with it.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

They don’t. I was swimming with my (37f) three adult sisters, mom, four-year-old nephew, and husband. Husband backed me right away but my sisters and mom...

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ReactionAble7945@reddit

In the end you can't save people who will not listen.

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CypherCake@reddit

Honestly, don't beat yourself up so bad. Definitely take the lessons so you are happier with your outcome next time. But remember that when we're in a sticky situation, fight or flight kicks in, it is VERY hard to think clearly and make all the best decisions. You don't have time to think and fear jams up the brain.

If this happens again, you'll be better prepared.

I've never taken lightning very seriously but even I wouldn't stay out in the open/in a pool etc during a storm like that.

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LifeHappenzEvryMomnt@reddit

In a way you’re fortunate because you had an opportunity to learn to do better.

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Agreeable-Clerk-7689@reddit

You are not the lifeguard thus community safety is not your responsibility.

In a dangerous situation I only focus on myself (If I had kids or grandkids I would focus on them too).

Those other people were just as qualified to look after themselves as you were. It is their responsibility.

Granted, if I notice something suspicious in my building I report it to the superintendent and to crime stoppers if it is serious enough.

The tree incident was not good but in a panic people can't always think straight. This has probably been ingrained in your brain and you won't do it again.

With the way people are today (random violence) I believe that you were prudent to look after yourself and your family. What if one of them came at you when you told them to get out of the water? Why take the risk for strangers? These were adults not 5 year olds alone.

My attitude may be harsher but I am a senior citizen and I need to focus on my own safety. I don't trust the general public due to random violence, road rage, etc. If it were an elderly person (or a young child alone with no adult around) I would have tried to convince them of the possible lightening strike. An ordinary adult - nope, not my responsibility.

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Vegetaman916@reddit

This, right here.

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FogTub@reddit

Just learn what you can and move forward. If you try to warn strangers about something, they'll usually be more concerned about you as a threat. People are oblivious, just focus on your family.

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Agreeable-Clerk-7689@reddit

Today people are very confrontational and what if someone thought you were a threat 'telling them what to do'. Better focus on you and yours. Unless you are the lifeguard or an official with clearly delineated responsibilities.

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There_Are_No_Gods@reddit

Messaging can be important in that context. Saying something like, "Lightning is about to strike! We're getting out of the water and heading to safety right now," where you focus on identifying the threat and stating an inclusive ("we") yet not authoritarian or confrontational ("you need to") plan can often avoid the aspect of someone feeling like you're overstepping and telling them what to do. Informing and inviting is the honey as opposed to threatening and demanding being the stick.

Leading by example can work well with a crowd, as long as you get get a few followers going in the right direction quickly to start building momentum, and you avoid triggering their defenses against perceived aggression or seemingly unwarranted claim of authority.

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Agreeable-Clerk-7689@reddit

True, but many seniors feel quite vulnerable these days, to possible aggression, so it is often just safer to remove ourselves from a situation.

A young, strong, muscular person may feel more at ease.

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Be7th@reddit

This is an amazing feeling you have.

That sick-in-the-gut, that guilt/relief...

Shelve it, and remember it when it counts.

I've had a few of those over the years and now I don't even question how people perceive me. Folks tend to sense the expertise if one is politely stern, and the crowd obtemperates.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

?

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Be7th@reddit

This is to mean, you may feel disappointed in yourself, but it actually is awesome that you feel as such.

Many people would just shrug it off and move on, but you actively review the scenario and see what could have went terribly wrong, not just for your close ones but also for strangers.

Hopefully you never encounter danger again, but if ever you do, that event can propulse your ability to perform under pressure, regardless of what that new danger could be.

And your demeanor will show that you care and know better.

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skyrymproposal@reddit (OP)

I see. Thank you.

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SunLillyFairy@reddit

This is exactly why people in the field do drills. You learn every time. The science is pretty interesting… when we sense danger our brains literally go into a stress reaction that turns on the need to move and turns down our ability to reason… so you can thank what is referred to as your “lizard brain.” If you’ve practiced (or lived through an event) previously, you have muscle memory and mental experience that helps keep your reasoning brain online.

Don’t be disappointed, you did great for a first run, much better than the others who had no sense of danger, and everyone was OK. You’ll do better next time.

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Kayakboy6969@reddit

Airplane ruels apply

Put the mask on yourself, then family.

Off duty office was publicly outed because he was in a mall with an active shooter. He did not engage. He was with his wife and children.

He called it in , as he moved his family to saftey.

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unorganized_mime@reddit

You got kids. You save your family first. Next time, given more experience, if you yell lightning I imagine people might run.

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moon_lizard1975@reddit

Now you've got experience. Take it at that. I'm sure you're even more ready than before because of this possible failure.

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Austechprep@reddit

My family has a safe word to use when we need to drop the jokes and take something seriously, it's been surprisingly effective, although it's not been in response to life threatening danger it has been useful for snapping me out of work mode during a meeting when I was interrupted for a family medical emergency I needed to help with.

The idea of it was in case one of us saw a snake or spider nearby or like above, one of the kids has been bitten, but it mostly (but still rarely) gets used to discretely say in public that we've had a bad reaction to food and need to get home immediately haha.

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EffinBob@reddit

Meh, if you had screamed, everyone else might have just looked at you like you were an idiot and tried to argue with you, possibly delaying your action to help your family. There's no need to worry about that.

If there's that much of a charge in the air, it was probably a crapshoot where the strike would actually occur. You weren't going to get out of the area fast enough to avoid what was going to happen. The tree wasn't a great idea, but lying flat on the ground might not have helped, either. You got lucky. Don't dwell on it.

Kudos on getting them out of the water. Be happy with that.

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tooserioustoosilly@reddit

You have no responsibility to help those not part of your family or friends. This whole idea that we are required to care for the community or society is just a long-term conditioning that society has been pushing on people. It's every individuals responsibility to protect themselves. It always has been, and it always will be. We are to protect those thst benefit us or those that will carry on our bloodlines or culture. Anyone who pushes the narrative that we need to help out those who refuse to help themselves are just people who want others to care for them ultimately. The worst policies of modern government are the welfare and policies that take responsibility for self-improvement and self responsibility away from the people. From modern teaching policies of no one left behind or everyone gets a trophy to the generational welfare cultures.

So do I care if my neighbors have their crops in and hay ready for winter? Sure, but I only care after I have mine in and know my livestock will be safe for the winter. If I have all mine ready and they look to need help, sure I will help them, but that's because they would help me. So it's still in my benefit and a benefit to my family that I help them.

Some will say I'm wrong, but ultimately, all that succeed and have their family thrive follow the natural order of things.

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Mountain_Fig_9253@reddit

You picked up on the static electricity in the air and the danger it presented before everyone else that day.

Be kind to yourself. This isn’t a scenario that you train for and it’s not one you find yourself in frequently. You have to rely on your brain to connect two data points, decipher them, then take action.

I say this as someone who worked as a paramedic for over a decade and a critical care nurse for awhile afterwards. Deciphering lessons learned is incredibly difficult to do and not be critical of yourself. You survived, so did everyone else, now it’s time to learn and become more resilient for the future. You did some things great, learn from those too. You want to build on that foundation and not wipe it out by fixating on a failure to act perfectly.

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oranggit@reddit

Don't beat yourself up. You got most of it right and nobody got hurt. Use this as a lesson learned and move forward.

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Mundane_Reality8461@reddit

Professionally, I keep people safe from hazardous weather.

Yet I experience such a struggle to get my wife and kids to come out of the pool when there is lightning nearby. We can see it in the distance and hear the thunder, and yet they moan about it. Like I’m an inconvenience

So way to go! You got them out. Sure, could fine tune the retreat location. But it’s a very reasonable mistake to make. Experiencing the electrical charge in the air as you did is quite uncommon and you can’t expect to have a tried and true approach to everything.

They’re safe. All those people are safe. Learn from this and do better next time. That’s all you can do.

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thenorm05@reddit

Something worth remembering. In emergencies where you are forced to act immediately without much warning, you don't usually rise to the occasion, and instead fall to your level of training.

If you aren't running scenarios in your mind regularly on the list of common and uncommon hazards, and also running physical drills from time to time, these things happen. It's not a personal failing, it's just an is. Very few people would react perfectly to most hazards. At least you recognized the danger, even if you didn't navigate it perfectly.

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johndoe3471111@reddit

It happens. Everyone talks shit until it all goes bad. A good deal of the “hero’s” or “badasses” that you see on here have their experiences rooted in Xbox video games so don’t let those chuckle heads get you down. The great news it is you reacted and maybe saved the family. The bonus is the experience. You would do things even better in those circumstances next time and that split second pause to think about all the other people will be there in any other crisis. It’s all about experience. That was a valuable one in many ways.

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New-Temperature-4067@reddit

at least the thunder proved you were right. you acted correctly altough sitting down on the beach would be better than under a tree.

next time especially with kids, make it a competition like, the last one to the beach isa chicken, then start building a sand castle. after the thunder explain what happened and how you knew.

this works best when kids are very young as to not unnecessarily scare them.

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Street-Owl6812@reddit

You have to remember that the fight or flight response is strong and you cant always control your monkey brain in those moments. One time my neighbor's fence was on fire and I called 911 but my brain got so jammed by panic that I forgot my own address, lol. Try not to beat yourself up because I think you did well under the circumstances, and now you know how to prepare your family for a future situation where you need them to respond quickly.

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eastyorkshireman@reddit

You reacted far in excess of what the majority of those around you did when you recognised imminent danger to your family.

Your situational awareness was on point and well done for that.

Yes, you made a couple of calls you are now questioning but these can just be filed under what I will do differently next time.

Nothing bad happened, it was a dry run and you demonstrated you have the wit to react to danger others haven't seen ut also got some free learning about it too.

As for your concern about everyone else, you and the family are your main priority until they are safe and secure, I'm sure tha majority of us would have made exactly the same call.

Most of the people if you had shouted that would have likely laugher or ignored you, cynical i know but it's reality.

Well done pal.

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FrumiousBanderznatch@reddit

It won't be the first time you feel like that. Just means you'll do better next time.

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malaliu@reddit

Nah man. Practice makes perfect. Muscle memory is real. Everyone's alive, and you've learnt something. Next time you'll act fast and decisively. And the fact that there was other people in the water means they had even less preparedness. You live, you learn!

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collectivethink@reddit

You did great. We don’t get to trial run these situations like operators in a CQB house. The first time put to the test (hopefully the last) I don’t think anyone should have expectations it’s going to go perfectly scripted.