I Guess This is Fate | TheaterFire

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damion789@reddit

Who knows, death may be the best experience ever.

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cerealandcorgies@reddit

paint a skull and crossbones on it. rock that lil alarm proudly, you've lived a lot of years and have earned it

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OreoSpeedwaggon@reddit

Bingo. Just because we get old doesn't mean we have to act old.

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Ima be the gal printing large-print character sheets for D&D Night at the old folks home, singing Tool songs in the hallway and pushing my flame-detailed walker to the boutique to get my hair dyed electric purple.

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mystery_biscotti@reddit

I'll bring the pureed prunes and Ensure. We can stay up late to play: 9:00 PM! 🩵

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D2Dragons@reddit

It’s a deal! I’ll show you how to glue vampire fangs to your dentures 😁

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cerealandcorgies@reddit

I'm gonna have nascar decals all over my rollator. Don't even like racing particularly I just think it looks badass.

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penprickle@reddit

Don’t forget the air horn!

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CaptainAwesome_5000@reddit

I have seen both walkers and canes with flame jobs and they were pretty badass.

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ShakespearianShadows@reddit

Put an Andre the Giant has a posse sticker on it

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MaximumJones@reddit

👆 This person GenXs right here.

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Infinite-Lychee-182@reddit (OP)

Love it!

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vf-guy@reddit

I see a clapper in your future. Lol. Joking aside, I bought one for someone once who is the same age and they loved it! Lol

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SAHMultrA1981@reddit

Could a person get one of these and wear it and when ice gets up in their business, just push the button??

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Violetgirl567@reddit

gif

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AnxiousDwarf@reddit

51m. I practice getting down and back up from the floor three times a day after seeing what one fall can do to an otherwise healthy senior.

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Violetgirl567@reddit

That's pretty smart!

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cerealandcorgies@reddit

Yoga. For no other reason that I have to get down on the floor and back up several times. The pace and poses just make it more intentional and less like I'm just sick of life and lying in the floor

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PinkyLeopard2922@reddit

About a month ago I was alone at home and messing around on a ladder in my yard that was not totally level and stable. You can guess what happened next. I came very close to impaling the left side of my chest on a piece of rebar in the ground that is being used as a plant support. My husband already worries because I am known to do things I really should not be doing and he was furious with me. I probably need one of these.

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Violetgirl567@reddit

Sister from another mister!!! I'm one of those too. On a ladder, with a chainsaw. Fell. Somehow had the presence of mind to toss the chainsaw away from me. (Felt like Wile E Coyote just hanging in midair for a bit). Thought I was a goner or at least going to be paralyzed. Just a majorly bruised ass. Bubble wrap and/or Nerf suits for us!

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NotReallyJohnDoe@reddit

This may not help you if you impale yourself on rebar.

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PinkyLeopard2922@reddit

You are 100% correct...especially on the left side of the chest! I had some nasty bruises from it but it could have been so much worse.

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postprandialrepose@reddit

Does anyone remember the other senior citizen in that LifeCall commercial? The old fella clutches his chest and blurts out:

I'M HAVING

#CHEST

PAIN!

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UnicornFarts1111@reddit

I do. Because I got teased in high school, because for about a week, I would get random chest pains. I went to the ER once and everything was fine. Never did find a cause so it was probably just stress, but kids will be kids.

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postprandialrepose@reddit

Of course kids are gonna figure out a way to use something fun and wholesome, like an old man crying out for life-saving medical attention, to hurt someone else.

I'm sure having chest pains was scary and that everyone busting your balls about it didn't help at all.

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zip-a-dee_doo-dah@reddit

Damn. Now you got me thinking of getting one.

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UnicornFarts1111@reddit

Since I use Apple anyway, I was thinking of getting the watch with the fall detection.

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Affectionate_Song_36@reddit

I just had to buy a medical bracelet for a not-fun new medical condition. In September, at the airport in Austin, I got stopped by TSA for wearing it. When I asked loudly, “Are you stopping me for wearing a MEDICAL bracelet???” the guy suddenly decided my shoes were the problem.

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Pretty-Concentrate33@reddit

If you fly often, no, if you fly 1 time per year, TSA precheck is the best $85 you will ever spend. No X ray machine unless we are in high alert, no shoes off, no computer outta the bag bs. Just head through the metal detector. It's awesome.

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UnicornFarts1111@reddit

I got upgraded on one flight to pre-check for free (I have NO clue how it happened). Anyway, I get there and go through the metal detector and get randomly stopped for further screening (I ALWAYS get stopped in the Xray machine due to having scoliosis does weird things to the way my clothes lay). So, when I got stopped at pre-check as well, I thought it was funny. They put some solution on my hands and swabbed them. It took about 5minutes and they let me go. When I get stopped at the extra, I get a pat on the back so they can feel my bra strap and they let me go.

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GroundbreakingBird16@reddit

My Apple Watch has the fall detection on always 😳

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UnicornFarts1111@reddit

I am thinking about getting one and this is a big factor in my deciding I probably should. I just don't know that I should put the money out on it at this time.

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Pale-Way-8731@reddit

Love my Apple Watch for so many reasons. The biggest reason I love it is for the “where the hell did I put my phone” button. BUT, I know that fall sensor will come in handy within the next few years.

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Fritz5678@reddit

I'll need to upgrade mine to the fall detection one at some point. Scared the hell out of my family not too long ago, but not having my phone or watch on me. They all thought I was dead.

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midnight_to_midnight@reddit

I hope you don't fall and can't get up.

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holidayoffools@reddit

Is this the same commercial where you got a prize for ordering and the old lady yells, "I got the microwave!!" (Whatever it was for, I still randomly yell this on occasion.)

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73rd-virgin@reddit

Mom's got one of those, they're kinda sensitive. There've been a few times where the pendant has bumped a table and called for help.

Then again, about six weeks ago, mom tripped over her granddaughter's mongrel and hit the floor, face down. It didn't activate.

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ImCaffeinated_Chris@reddit

This has put recent setbacks in perspective for me. Perhaps I should just slow down the abuse of my body at this age. I've been struggling with not being able to do certain full contact hobbies like I used to.

Stay strong, and off the floor!

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tracknod@reddit

I purchased an Apple Watch for my mum a couple years ago and it has saved her twice now. Once she was taking out her garbage can to the street and she fell in a snowdrift and got stuck. Her watch called EMS. (I know, I laughed too. I’m going to hell)

The second time, she fell in the bathroom and hit her head and became concussed. The Apple Watch again called 911 and got her to the hospital.

It sucks getting older and losing your balance.

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bulldogdrool@reddit

Second the Apple Watch. Saved my mother as well from a fall outside and called the EMS for her.

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Old_Till2431@reddit

🤔🤔🤔 my son handed me a cane with a skull and tophat . Maybe il rock that one instead 👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽

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3speedracer@reddit

Hell, most of us will get there. I work in aged care, I've already watched our 'clients' go from people who have always been old to me (silent gen, WW2 gets, etc), proper manners, listen to "old people" music. Now we've got boomer rock'n'rollers listening to Elvis and that era. Even have a few hippies showing up. I'm 50, so I reckon I'll be working long enough to see a huge cultural change in aged care residents, including Gen-x, and that's gonna be cool. Keep on rockin.

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rhcedar@reddit

You know how you know you're old?? When you fall people say "Shit!! Are you alright Sir/Ma'am??", instead of laughing at you. (This was me last February)

I think every generation goes through this. It's the attitude that's different. A lot of great supportive comments. Own it!! You got it!! You won't be alone either, I can promise you that!!

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rextasy001@reddit

I should probably have one of these, living alone with no friends or relatives within a two hour drive. Disaster hasn't come yet, but when it does I hope it kills me outright.

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SteamshipsAndTea@reddit

Is that the “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!” device?

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Infinite-Lychee-182@reddit (OP)

Yup

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Average0ldGuy@reddit

Kind of related, my 88 year old mom still driver around, out meeting friends 2-3 times a week. But just in case, I attached Samsung Tag on her car keys, camera all over the home, except restroom. Made her wear medical bracelet and Apple watch. So far only time I ever check the camera was when she was yapping away with her friends and ignore my calls.

If any of X-Redditors have parents still alive, might be a good idea to setup the parent's home and parents, just in case.

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Rishtu@reddit

You just need a clapper now.

gif

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mephitine@reddit

Dang, it’s crazy how often I think about having a clapper to turn my lights off now that I’m old!

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Erinn_13@reddit

Perhaps it is a right of passage. We all laughed at how over the top the commercials were. As young people we were clueless when it came to things to worry about as we age.

I’m getting my hip replaced a week from today. I get to use a walker, cane and a tub bench! I am a bonafide old woman now!

I am so glad this allows you to feel more safe and comfortable. I wish you well and hope you remain healthy and happy!

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trahnse@reddit

I'm one week post partial knee replacement. Sucks getting old 😭

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Erinn_13@reddit

How are you doing/healing?

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trahnse@reddit

Pretty good I think! The first couple days were hell with pain and having to ask for help with everything. After that, I've been doing well. Pain is controlled, physical therapy has been coming to my home. I think I'm ready to transition to outpatient. Hopefully my surgeon will let me go back to work at 6 weeks, but we'll see!

Good luck with your surgery! Stay on top of the pain meds and do the therapy! You'll do great!

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Erinn_13@reddit

That is my plan! Wishing you continued progress!

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Infinite-Lychee-182@reddit (OP)

Good luck with your surgery!

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LayerNo3634@reddit

Better safe than sorry. Add some band stickers and wear it like a backstage pass.

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mustardmadman@reddit

Fuck all that. Just setup some Alexa’s and if you fall, just yell out a prompt to contact someone

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Strict_Weather9063@reddit

Why I keep my Apple Watch on my left wrist and not my right. So I can try and trigger the alert if I’m having a heart attack, it auto triggers the alert if I fall.

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chrispd01@reddit

Why not just get an Apple Watch ?

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SinoSoul@reddit

Does not an Apple Watch do the same (and much more?) that’s why we got it for pops and it did notify when he actually did fall and needed stitches

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cerealandcorgies@reddit

yah but the VA ain't handing out Apple Watches. Yet

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Infinite-Lychee-182@reddit (OP)

The VA got it for me

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CntBlah@reddit

At least with the bypasses, you’ve certainly found the beef 👍

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Zealousideal_Sink420@reddit

My mom got herself an Apple Watch when she hit that stage and was living alone. Not inexpensive, but did the trick!

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elspotto@reddit

Oh dear. Have you fallen? Can you not get up?

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Taekwonmoe@reddit

We all cursed ourselves for laughing. lol.

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timberwolf0122@reddit

You say that but when I fall and can’t get up I am going to die laughing

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insecurecharm@reddit

Knowing me, if I get some kind of personal alarm that triggers a call, I'm going to deliver that line while laughing my ass off. They'll probably mark it as a prank.

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Taekwonmoe@reddit

Back when covid first hit, pretty sure after being vaxed, my back went out. I live by myself, my girlfriend doesn't live far but she works in healthcare so I didn't want her to catch covid. I remember ordering doordash. When the food came to my door, I hobbled over to the door but couldn't bend over to pick up the order. I had to close the door, get on my hands and knees, then opened the door to grab it. I swore I thought I probably looked like gollum reaching for the ring. I was sick, in pain, on all fours. I closed the door and laughed as I ate by the door on the floor. Good times.

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elspotto@reddit

I will still laugh. I laugh at the advent calendar full of prescription meds on the kitchen counter. I laugh at the knee brace I have to wear because I did fun stuff when I was younger. I laugh at that daggum ringing in my ears from all the great concerts in HS and college and the job I had in the army that involved loving a lot of very large, very loud equipment on and off ships and around the terminal at Rotterdam during desert storm.

What else can I do? I’m GenX.

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GrayLightGo@reddit

I'm glad your taking your safety seriously, remember the good old days when we didn't think about it at all!

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No-Onion8029@reddit

Just seeing the pic made me hear the commercial.

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BWWFC@reddit

your safety and peace of mind first... fk all the others. they'll get theirs sooner or later LOL ;-p

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xjeanie@reddit

Had a triple bypass 2.5 years ago now. You got this. I know the recovery is difficult. Gotta keep moving. Do what your doctor says. Cardiac rehab works. ❤️‍🩹

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tmarthal@reddit

there is also have a wrist version if you prefer not to wear the device around your neck (not an apple watch, the same device type as in the original post)

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