ULPT Request: Seduce my coworker
Posted by TA1235689@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 60 comments
Throwaway account for obvious reasons. I am currently working a temp job that ends at the end of the year. After that I will never see anyone from this job again.
My coworker kissed me last week. He has been hot and cold since then. Some days avoiding me, other days he is back to kissing me.
I want to continue. Other than dressing more scandalous, how should I seduce him when he avoids being alone with me?
Avanelst@reddit
I'd like an update please.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Update: I ignored him all day yesterday. Didn't even look in his direction. Our office is closed until Monday so probably no updates until then. But I promise you lovely strangers of reddit that I will update this post over the next few months while my horny saga plays out. Wish me luck.
Avanelst@reddit
I LOVE the cat and mouse game you're entrenched in. I think long term the more updates you provide the more emotionally invested readers will become. As a male a in a professional office setting, I too often wish I could fall into such a web like you crafting!
You've got my vote!
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
I love that you love this. Even if this goes nowhere, I'm having fun writing it down nonetheless.
Update #2: so during one of our off days last week, I had to go by the office because I left something behind and he was coming in just as I was leaving. We were the only two there, and he seemed almost mad to see me so I just grabbed my stuff and ran out pretty quickly.
Today, back to the office, back to my heavy handed ignoring him. He came to my desk around lunch and asked if I hated him. I said no. We talk a little bit. He apparently came after me when I stopped by last week but I was gone by the time he came out into the hallway. I'm kicking myself for walking too fast, but also feels like it adds to the sexual tension which I am here for.
So next thing I know, we're making out in the stairwell. Then, after some heavy petting, he's back to "we can't." So I fixed my clothes and walked away, flipping him the bird with my most devious smile. We shall see where things are tomorrow. He knows I come in early and am alone for about an hour before anyone else gets there, so stay tuned.
Avanelst@reddit
oh god can't wait HAHA Thanks TA
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Update: we're back to cold. he is back to avoiding being alone with me. I want to both rip his clothes off and throw him off this building. Will update if this changes. Ugh.
Avanelst@reddit
It sounds to me like he's a timid dog to a stranger.
I think you need to invite him out for a quick lunch. Change the environment. He may be just overly cautious and not wanting to get caught.
Switch it up, work play seems to be hit and miss with this one.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
It's so strange because HE started out as the hardcore pursuer here, with seemingly very little concern about being caught. I did not start this, he entirely did and then once he kissed me, I was like okay yeah let's do it. NOW he has cold feet. I would have preferred to keep our light flirting going if I knew he'd take ten steps backwards.
I poked my head in his office yesterday and said "still no?" And he said "still no." So I gave him my number on a piece of paper that says "if you ever change your mind. Life is short." It's been a day since then and he is still cold. I think I've shot my shot, and we'll just have to see if he comes around before this job ends. If not, oh well, his loss. Still going to dress obnoxiously hot though.
Avanelst@reddit
You'll have to forgive me on this next comment, but I think it would be fun for you to post neck down photos of these hot outfits. Bonus points if you like heels, extenuating those legs.
Depending on the backlash, I may delete this message lol, but let's stir up the pot.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Honestly, might as well. At least I'll know someone appreciates them. I'll post to my profile tomorrow. Feedback welcome. I'm hoping to make this man sweat.
Avanelst@reddit
Its been quiet, did you ever get around to your photo shoot?
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
No, still considering it, but concerned about doxxing myself so leaning towards not posting any pics publicly.
Avanelst@reddit
I'm always open to DMs lol
Anyway, what's new? I sense that spark for your coworker is fading, if not already burnt out.
EffReddit420@reddit
Have you tried asking him?
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Yes. The answer changes daily. One day I am irresistible, the next it "would be better if we didn't."
hamsandwich232@reddit
Sounds like he is married....
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Yeah I'm pretty sure he is. Annoyingly makes the whole thing more tempting.
Fragrant-Wall-@reddit
Dirty hoe
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Ooh stop it daddy.
liquid_acid-OG@reddit
Show him your tits when this happens.
If it doesn't change his mind, move on.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Hit him with the tried and true pierced nipple reveal, usually gets them.
liquid_acid-OG@reddit
I mean.. now I'm interested lol
Hope you have a spiked stud, those feel the best on the tongue
No_The_Other_Todd@reddit
you got your answer. if he's not consistent, why are you wasting your time?
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Ugh because I am bored, hot, and horny. And he is hot and for some reason the inconsistency makes him hotter. Why am I like this?
AdImmediate9569@reddit
It’s pretty normal. You’re describing every office romance. Also he’s married or close to it.
Ignore him. He will be all over you.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
I'm pretty sure he is married or, like you said, at least close to it. Again, I hate myself for this, but that makes it hotter. I'm going to blast music in my headphones and ignore him unless/until he comes to me.
Aromatic-Arugula-896@reddit
Honey good God please don't play with fire. You're asking to lose your job
Find some self respect
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
The job is just temporary. I have another lined up for after this one that is permanent. I don't need this place as a reference, won't list it on my CV, and am only here to collect some paychecks while I wait for the other job to start.
Self-respect, yeah I could definitely work on that. I clearly don't handle rejection well and this whole thing has been an eye opener for me. But I could either work on it now, or wait a few months, hopefully have a fun fling, and then work on it later. I don't have enough self-respect to choose the former right now and am leaning into my devilish impulses. Life has been particularly hard this year, not that that gives me an excuse to be shitty, but I'm being unabashedly shitty nonetheless.
AdImmediate9569@reddit
No judgement from me. Adult relationships are complex. Just pretend you don’t care. You’ll be fucking in the handicapped by tomorrow afternoon.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
God I love reddit. I will report back in a week for anyone who is now personally invested in my horny work romance. Thank you kind strangers for helping me get the strange.
AdImmediate9569@reddit
Please do. Idk why, but im rooting for ya
EffReddit420@reddit
Furthermore at this point if he said no, asking is to help you would be borderline rape
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Fair point. If the genders were reversed, this would probably be a different conversation. Not going to force it, just want to make it ridiculously tempting.
Material-Bill3803@reddit
Pretty sure piss discs or liquid ass would work.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Thank you, I'm peeing in a frisbee as we speak. Gonna freeze it in the company kitchen and then leave it on his windshield.
Successful_Stomach@reddit
The woman he’s seeing is gonna send you a piss disk I hope for it
bpetersonlaw@reddit
Flirt with a different guy in the office. Make him jealous.
Erudyx@reddit
hmmm check if he don't already have a gf/wife..
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
I do have my suspicions. But he already kissed me, multiple times, so it feels a little late for that. Yes I am a piece of shit who would still do this with or without a wife in the picture.
Erudyx@reddit
Are you aiming for a sex friend or a boyfriend ? For the boyfriend plan, a cheating man will always be a cheating man, if he cheated for you, he will cheat for someone else
Unethical solution if he do have a wife, ask someone to "catch you off guard" while you guys are kissing, this someone then sends picture to the wife, now wait for him to crawl back at you because he feels alone.
Risky tho, because he might stop talking to you to "prove his loyalty" to his wife
Jordano_Golds@reddit
He’s probably married
Ok_Perception1131@reddit
Let him see you flirting with someone else.
Tell him he’s right, it would be a bad idea for you guys to hook up. You’re not looking for a relationship and it sounds like he is.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Unfortunately I work in a very small office and everyone else is absolutely hideous. Lovely people, would rather jump off this building than bone anyone else.
He is definitely not looking for a relationship either. We were both very clear about that.
DaLakeShoreStrangler@reddit
Let him make the choice. For example, just say that u want "it" and ur ready and he does not have to give u reasons or excuses, just say what u want to do with him and it does not matter what his situation is. U can write it down and give it to him before you leave with ur contact or just say it. Obviously he wants you, but something is holding. Don't listen to moral police, they are in the wrong sub.
burner118373@reddit
Tell him you wanna bone. Women have like 103% success rate with that
Obvious-Release-5605@reddit
Kidnap the guy and keep him in a 10 ft pit dug in your basement.
n00dl3s54@reddit
Don’t forget the lotion in a basket on a string every now n again.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
This is it.
baseballforlyf420@reddit
Grab him by the balls and tell him to stop messing around or u squeeze harder
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
This feels like it would be cathartic.
sysop042@reddit
Dudes love puppies and margaritas. Bring some to work.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
I did go take some shots over lunch, hoping it would make me feel less desperate for his attention but I think it made it worse honestly lol.
Dangerous-Gap7037@reddit
Ask if he likes cardio
Jumpy-Ad6470@reddit
Tell him you have no gag reflex.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Lol I did print some salacious pics and put them in an envelope that says "let me know if you wanna see me on my knees."
"I have no gag reflex" was a close second.
Have not given him the envelope. Saving it for better timing when it doesn't feel so desperate.
Jumpy-Ad6470@reddit
Really though, just walk up to him near the end of the shift and ask him if he wants to come over tonight.
It's that easy. If he declines, drop it because he isn't actually interested or scared of diping in the company ink.
nyxinadoll@reddit
Rub your scent on his belongings.
Pure_Log7513@reddit
YOU be cold & hot — and definitely start with a whole lot of cold first. You’re waiting for him to decide if it’s on or not. Only actual puppies are cute when they are desperate and pathetic — humans not so much. There is nothing more attractive than you being confident enough to withhold the kissing unless it meets you terms cause you go other options.
For the record, I’d consider this a fling. Get your rocks off and get out.
TA1235689@reddit (OP)
Okay this is decent advice and probably the advice I needed to hear. Operation cold, sexy bitch is a go.
Good_Habit3774@reddit
I seduced my husband at work by telling him sexy stories and dreams